Welcome to the Pseudo Legacy, where the last scion of the Legacina elves follows a mysterious prophecy
that seems to indicate that he shall be the one who founds the legacy to restore the lost magic and strength
of the Legacina line.
Why ‘Pseudo’ Legacy? Well, to be honest, I didn’t want to give up any of my hacks and that pretty much
nixes this from being a legacy that follows the official rules.
Now, on with the story!
This chapter was originally uploaded to the Sims2 Exchange on January 21, 2007.
Sim State University, a place far from the wilds of Pleasantview where he grew up, is the place that Teylir
Legacina, now calling himself Taylor, has chosen to come for his education. After all, if he is to found a
legacy to revive his family’s lost glory, then having an education is going to be a very helpful thing.
It has been several years since his parents and grandfather were callously killed by the whims of a
despicable vampire. As far as Taylor is aware, he has escaped the evil woman’s notice and is now free to
follow the dictates of the prophecy.
“Why am I hearing voices?”
“Great. Not only am I hearing voices, I’m talking out loud to myself. What a way to make an impression on
my first day.” He sighed.
Well, as narrator, I didn’t think Taylor would be able to hear me this quickly. This is a phenomenon that has
been known to happen among legacy sims, but for some reason, I thought my sims would be immune.
“Yeesh, and to top it off, the voice in my head is talking to itself too. Greeaaaat.”
Taylor Legacina is a Cancer, popularity aspiration, with the lifetime want to become a General. His stats are 5
Neat, 5 Outgoing, 5 Active, 5 Playful, and 5 Nice. A very middle of the road sim.
“Gah. Stupid voice-in-my-head.”
Continuing on, Taylor is a popularity sim with a lifetime want of becoming a General. Unfortunately, that
beautiful flowing hair is never going to cut it in the military, so we ought to cut it now. Perhaps a buzz cut?
“Look voice-in-my-head, I am not cutting my hair. They’re not that strict. This is the sim military that went
to war on the garden gnomes after all. I’ll just put it back in a ponytail. Now it’s out of the way.”
I’m not sure that would fly in the real world, but whatever floats your boat, Taylor. I guess I like the ponytail
Since he is a popularity sim, it’s time to start making friends. And finding a suitable mate.
I’m not sure why popularity sims have such a bad reputation among legacy players. In my mind, they’re
easy as pie to handle. Give them a phone and they’re well on their way to have as many friends as their
little pixel hearts desire.
“Wait a sec, voice-in-my-head, did you say mates? Come on, I just got to college! Let me sow my wild oats.”
“Hey! Aren’t you Laci Mazza?” Taylor got excited when he met his first dormie, thinking he might have met a
“Huh? No... I’ve got no idea who this Lazi Macca is. My name is Christa Kearney.”
“Oh.. uh.. sorry.” Swallowing, Taylor offers a sheepish grin, “You look just like someone I’d read about. Just..
just as a word of advice, you should probably stay away from cow plants and vampires.”
“Whatever...” Walking away, the Laci Mazza clone muttered, “Pointy eared freak.”
Well, don’t let that get you down, Taylor. She’s always had people issues.
Trying again with the next dormie, Taylor introduces himself with a touch of trepidation, “Uh.. hi. I’m Taylor.”
“Nice to meetcha. I’m Cherry.” She pauses, “I’m not going to bite you. Unless you really want me to.”
Looking him up and down, she adds, “Not that I’d mind that, you’re kinda hot.”
“Uh...” Blushing and laughing nervously, Taylor realizes he might have found a romance sim, “Maybe. So..
what’s your major?”
After a couple of conversations and in spite of her boldly forward advances, Taylor’s had his first friend.
Taylor’s next friend was a rather rebellious looking dormie by the name of Charlie Thompson.
Wait, you can hear me? You’re not supposed to hear me at all, you’re a dormie!
“Pfft. Whatever, lady. You may be fishing for chicks to hitch up Taylor, but you need some eye candy as well.
I got a feeling you’ll be wanting me around for a while.”
The first few weeks of college were a blur of new people and hard work. After all, Taylor had absolutely no
skills or money when he came to college, so he was at a bit of a disadvantage when it came to getting his
grades up there.
Still, with some hard work and dedication, he was easily able to get a 4.0 halfway through his Freshman
Of course, it didn’t hurt at all that he’d gone out of his way to befriend his professors. One in particular
seemed to get along with him rather well.
Professor Kelly Hanby was a young woman not long out of school herself, and she found Taylor’s sense of
humor to be quite charming. He might struggle a bit with some of the coursework, but he could tell a great
Actually, they both enjoyed each other’s company quite a bit more than either really wanted to admit. After
all, there was this whole student-teacher professionalism boundary between them. Professor Kelly knew
some professors took advantage of their students, but she didn’t want to be like that.
Cherry, on the other hand, had no boundaries at all between her and what she wanted, which was Taylor.
Despite his uncertainty about the situation, Taylor was quite flattered at the attention from Cherry. She
wasn’t unattractive, and she was quite definitely persistent.
“Uh.. oh my.. Cherry, I don’t think that’s anatomically possible, but.. uhm.. heh... it sure sounds interesting.”
She had quite the talent for getting the usually verbose Taylor to blush profusely.
“Come on hot stuff. I’ve got something I want to show you. And something I want to see. And do, and
touch...” Grabbing his hand, Cherry led the finally willing Taylor to her dorm room.
This led from one thing to another, which led to another, and finally, in the end, Taylor learned the true
meaning of woohoo. Cherry certainly knew the ins and... er... well, she had a good grasp on.. uhm... She
had a good understanding of the wooing and the hooing.
Unfortunately, Cherry’s somewhat dim roommate had no sense of timing. Lisa Trottier scratched her head,
“Hey Cherry? Do you know what the capitol of Bulgaria is? Or maybe your boyfriend does?”
It did bring Taylor down from his high a touch.
While he greatly enjoyed the evening with Cherry, Taylor spent the rest of the day thinking about someone
else. Cherry might be fun to spend time with, but she’d never be someone he could enjoy spending the rest
of his life with. He needed someone who could be his best friend as well as his lover. He needed someone
smart, witty, intelligent. Someone who would understand and support his need to found a legacy.
He needed Professor Kelly.
“Kelly, I.. I know we said we wouldn’t cross that line because you didn’t want to be one of those teachers,
but...” Taking a deep breath, Taylor blurted it all out, “I just can’t get you out of my head. You’re my best
friend, you understand my jokes, you’re good at anything you put your mind to, and you’re gorgeous.
Please, can we give this a try?”
“I.. Taylor.. I don’t know what to say...”
“I don’t... mmmphle! Mmmmmmmmmm.”
Taylor really didn’t give her a chance to say no. From the stories he’d heard of his parents, his father never
let his mother have a chance to say no either, and if Professor Kelly was the one he wanted, he needed to
let her know in no uncertain terms.
In the end, Professor Kelly was quite agreeable to the whole thing.
After that, the semesters seemed to fly by in a daze of studying, skilling, and dating Professor Kelly. Taylor
was fairly content with life in the dorms, but it always felt like there was something he was missing out on.
One day between class and skilling, he took a good look around campus using the telescope up on the roof.
A streaker was running across the quad, there was a professor making out with a student up in the tower
with the hot tub, the cow mascot was tormenting some poor freshmen. And then he saw the Greek Houses.
“Oh my gosh, is he... Wow. He really is. That’s totally...” Taylor was astoundingly disturbed by whatever it
was he was seeing over at Urele Oresha Cham House.
“WAIT! That’s it! That’s what I need to do. I need to found my own Greek House. It’ll be a legacy within my
Somehow, everyone knows when they’re being spied upon, so Ashley Pitts came rushing over to the dorm
to give Taylor a good thrashing. Instead, he was shocked to find a very angry and determined Taylor ready
to face him.
“You think you’re hot stuff being in that Greek House. Well, I’ll tell you buddy, I’ve seen what kind of person
you are, and you’re nothing! And to prove it to you, I’m going to start my own Greek House! Where people
don’t need to kowtow to your kind of slime!”
Taylor immediately called up Professor Kelly to share his ideas with her. She was always a great sounding
board for his thoughts.
Apparently she had no objections to Taylor’s plan to start a Greek House.
Phi Dagga Katta wasn’t much to look at in the beginning. A few walls, some run down appliances, a table,
some chairs. It didn’t matter, though. Taylor was still the talk of the campus.
His first visitor was the irrepressible Whitney Buckingham, cheerleader extraordinaire. After all, save the
cheerleader, save the...
“Wrong show, voice-in-my-head.”
Oh yeah. What I meant was, befriend the cheerleader, befriend the campus.
In addition to Whitney and her cheering ways, there were also the two mascots that took turns showing up.
Neil Pederson, the Llama, and Colin Cox, the Cow, didn’t really get along that well, but they’d occasionally
Finally, the other important person that Taylor met after founding Phi Dagga Katta was the streaker.
“Hi! I’m Parker Parker. Part of the Greek Society welcoming committee. It’s good to have you here.” Parker
Parker was nothing if not gregarious.
“Uhm... dude, you’ve got no clothes on. You’re just... hanging out there.” Taylor was a touch disturbed by
this, but Parker Parker was disarmingly friendly and eventually our founder was able to see past the
And yes, his name really is Parker Parker.
Phi Dagga Katta is also where the Gnome Conspiracy was born. Taylor took great joy in buying his first lawn
gnome, but random people would show up and insist on stealing the durn thing. I think he went through a
good half dozen gnomes during his last two years in school.
Taylor quickly became known around campus for holding some of the best toga parties seen in a long time.
Of course, his first party was almost his last. You see, the juice was flowing rather freely at this first party,
and Taylor had a little too much to drink. A lot too much actually. Especially with what he was about to do.
“Mmm. Cherry on top. Heheh. C’mere.” He was drunk. She was wearing a sheet. And, of course, Cherry
certainly wasn’t going to object to another chance to fool around with Taylor.
“TAYLOR LEGACINA! How dare you!” Professor Kelly’s wounded shout immediately shattered the spell of
juice and bubbles. Cheery wisely crept away and let the two ‘lovebirds’ be.
“K.k.kelly, I.. I d.don’t... I... Uh.. oh gosh.” Taylor stammered away.
“Whitney, dear child, please move yourself. You’re blocking my view of Professor Kelly in her bikini. That and
I’m missing out on the drama. What use is there being a professor at this school if I do not at least get the
opportunity to witness such fine drama once in a while?” Professor Peter Boyle added finally, “Not to
mention witnessing such a fine professor in her bikini.”
Taylor didn’t care about anyone else there and set right to groveling, “Kelly, I don’t know what I was
thinking. I wasn’t thinking. It was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. Please, please, PLEASE forgive my
stupid sorry a..”
“Save it. I don’t want to hear it. You told me you wanted a woman to be at your side, but apparently that
wasn’t good enough. You can have your dormie trash.” Kelly turned and stalked off the lot.
“Hey, I heard that!” Cherry shouted.
“Charlie man, I don’t know what to do. I’m miserable without her. I don’t want to give up on the Greek
House, though. I need someone else here to help me out. Uh.. would you consider joining me?”
Ever aware, Charlie said on the other end of the line, “You want me to be a placeholder, huh?”
“Uh, that’s not what I said, Charlie.” Taylor blinked a few times at the phone.
“No sweat, Taylor. It’s no biggie. Besides, who knows what might come after being a placeholder. Sure, I’ll
join your Greek House.”
“Charlie, I’m going to die if I don’t get her back. She’s all I can think about.” Taylor was getting rather pitiful
about the whole thing.
“Hey, I’m just a hot knowledge sim. I don’t know that much about women. But, I’d say call her up and
apologize again, now that you’re not smelling like pineapple juice and bubbles, and Cherry’s not in the
“You’re brilliant, dude!” Taylor rushed off to find the phone.
“Hey, does this mean I can eat your grilled cheese sandwich too?”
“Okay Taylor. What is it?” Professor Kelly hesitantly came over to the house after Taylor’s call. Charlie wisely
decided to go to class right around then. He might be a knowledge sim, but there were some things he
didn’t want to see.
“Kelly, please hear me out. No words can ever make up for me being a drunken idiot. I could blame it on the
juice, I could blame it on Cherry, I could blame it on everything under the sun, and that still wouldn’t make
up for what I did to you.” Taylor took a deep breath and forged ahead, “You are all I think about, day and
night. I don’t think I can go forward with the legacy if I don’t have you at my side, and now that I’ve done
the stupidest thing on the planet, I know I may have lost you forever. Please forgive me. I don’t want to
spend my days without you at my side.”
Perhaps the words were enough. Perhaps it was the contrition in Taylor’s face. Perhaps it was that she didn’t
want to be without him either. Whatever it was, Professor Kelly gave a quiet sigh and pulled him close, “If I
ever catch you doing something like that again, I’m going to feed you to a cowplant, resurrect you and then
do it all over again. For a very, very long time.”
With Taylor’s relationship with Professor Kelly restored, life returned to a semblance of normal at the Greek
House. He and Charlie happily continued their success at skilling, studying, and partying. Everyone loved a
good smustle on their front lawn.
Phi Dagga Katta may have humble beginnings, but its founder and first placeholder earned their rights to
adorn the walls for the generations to come.
Taylor graduated at the top of his class and Summa Cum Laude. Despite his cavalier attitude, Charlie was
sad to see the man go. He was aware that as placeholder, he would essentially be frozen in time until
Taylor’s children came to Sim State.
For Taylor’s part, he was eager to get on with the meat of his legacy as foretold by the prophecy.
The move from college to his new home lot was a rather large transition for Taylor. Though he had gotten
used to a degree of lawn living with Phi Dagga Katta, he felt as if he should have moved beyond such
“Voice-in-my-head, are you sure you can’t hit me with just one motherlode? Walls would be really nice. And
You’ll get the bed when you get home from work and we can sell your car. You’re a little late for work and
you need a promotion.
Horrified, Taylor whined, “You’re going to sell my car!? But.. but I had a specific want for that car and
Look, we can either sell the car and get you a bed or you can sleep on the ground when you finally pass
out. You’re not in college anymore. You don’t get the ‘sleep on floor’ option.
Despite his complaints..
“Hey, I don’t complain that much.”
Hush. Despite his complaints, Taylor did settle in to his new life rather easily. A promotion came quickly. One
more and he could call up Professor Kelly and set the time for their wedding. He couldn’t wait until she
could join him. He just hoped she wouldn’t be too upset at the accommodations.
Having a goal like that in mind made the skilling necessary for promotions that much easier. Taylor worked
hard to reach the level of physical prowess needed to advance through the military.
Eventually the time came for the wedding. Since Taylor was a popularity sim, there was no way he was
going to get married without having a party. Scraping together his bonuses from his recent promotions (and
the sale of his car), he was able to afford a wedding arch and a buffet. That left no room for chairs, though.
No one seemed to mind too much, though.
“I, Taylor Legacina, take you, Professor Kelly, to be my wife. To have, to hold, and cherish for all of my sim
“And I, Professor Kelly Hanby (no relation to Lucy), take you, Taylor Legacina, to be my husband. To have,
to hold, and woohoo for all of my sim days.”
There was a huge kiss I forgot to photograph, and then much cheering.
And the first thing Professor Kelly did after kissing Taylor to seal the marriage was to rush over to the
counter and start cleaning it with a flourish of bubbles.
Professor Kelly Hanby Legacina revealed herself to be a popularity sim with the want to have 20 best
friends. Her attributes were 10 Neat, 7 Outgoing, 3 Active, 4 Playful, and 4 Nice.
With two popularity sims in the house, the phone was going to be getting a definite workout.
Despite her cleaning fetish and the meager accommodations, the party went off without a hitch. All of
Taylor’s college friends were there, including Parker Parker and Charlie Thompson. They also happily invited
in Melissa Fancey when she wandered onto the lot.
“Y’know Taylor, I always had a thing for you. I guess I regret I wasn’t as forward as Cherry or as lucky as
Professor Kelly.” Kenya Jeffries had hit the juice a little too hard and caused an uncomfortable moment.
“Uh.. Kenya, you’re a pretty girl and I know some sim down the line will take a shine to you, but I value
your friendship above anything else. And you know I’m madly in love with Professor Kelly. Come on, let’s
play some red hands.” Taylor had learned a little bit of tact over the years.
When the party was over, Professor Kelly took some time to change her look. She’d left the university
behind, so there was no reason to keep the same staid look. A wardrobe change and wearing her hair looser
gave her a much more relaxed demeanor.
“Kelly...” Taylor began hesitantly.
Interrupting him, Professor Kelly said, “You know, this may not fit the typical fairy tale a girl has, but this is
probably the happiest day of my life, Taylor. You here by my side, the stars over head, and a phone on the
wall that I can use any time I want.” Turning towards him, she smiled, “I love you.”
His response involved no words other than an eventual ‘Woohoo!’
As the days progressed, both Taylor and Professor Kelly worked hard at their respective careers and goals.
Taylor was making headway in the military career and was already in line to become a senior officer.
Professor Kelly took a job in the athletic career, but was much more focused on making and keeping friends.
“Hi Melissa. How are you doing?”
“It’s me, Professor Kelly.”
“Professor Kelly Legacina. You know, you were at my wedding the other day.”
“Well, yes, I know we only talked for a moment or two, but I thought we could chat and become best
frien... Hello? Melissa? Are you there? Oh, she hung up on me.”
Amidst the working, skilling, and talking, there were also nights of loving woohoo between Taylor and
Professor Kelly, leading to something everyone but Professor Kelly seemed to be expecting.
Yes dear, that happens when you woohoo constantly. Birds, bees, and Try For Baby and all that.
“TAYLOR!! I’m pregnant!” Despite her shock, she really was overjoyed about this whole thing.
Taylor was also thrilled with the prospect of becoming a daddy. With a baby on the way, he made sure to
work hard enough so that they could put some walls up and paint the place so it would be more like a real
“Hi little baby. I’m your daddy. We’re gonna have so much fun, you and me.” Taylor loved rubbing Professor
Kelly’s tummy and talking to the baby.
“Hee... Taylor, that tickles. I hope you still feel this way when you have to change her stinky diaper.”
“Her? What if it’s a him. We should probably start talking about names, Kelly.”
“Hmm. What about Sassafras?”
“Uh...” Taylor could tell this was going to be a long discussion.
Quicker than could be expected, the day arrived. Kelly was less than thrilled with the whole concept of labor.
“AAAAAHHHRRG! THIS HURTS! TAYLOR!!!! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!”
“Oh my, what do you want me to do? Kelly? Kelly?!?” Taylor leapt from the couch, rushing to her side.
“YOU CAN DIE! AIEEEE! PAINFULLY!”
Luckily for everyone involved, the sim birthing process is relatively quick, despite what any sim mother
thinks. In the blink of an eye Professor Kelly was holding their new daughter in her hands.
“What should we name her, Taylor? You didn’t like any of my names, so you choose.” Professor Kelly was
astoundingly serene after her initial outburst.
Beaming with pride but approaching with caution, Taylor asked, “What do you think of the name Zoey?”
I think that’s perfect. Welcome little Zoey Legacina, our first legacy born child.
“Thanks voice-in-my-head. I know I like it.” Taylor smiled down at his daughter.
“Taylor, who are you talking to?”
With Zoey snug in her crib, the two legacy lovebirds cuddled together in bed. Taylor suddenly and adoringly
looked at Professor Kelly and said, “I think we should have another one.”
“So soon?” But Kelly was smiling.
Grinning, he replied, “Yeah. At least, it sure can’t hurt to try. I like the trying part.”
And try they did. Pretty much everywhere in the house. Thankfully Zoey was far too young to walk in on
them during this time.
Time passed quickly, and a day arrived that Taylor had been looking forward to since the moment he knew
Professor Kelly was pregnant — the chance to throw a birthday party!
All the regulars from college came to the party. Parker Parker, Gavin Miller, Whitney Buckingham, and so on.
Charlie Thompson looked on with a grin, knowing that it wouldn’t be that long before Zoey would grow up
and join him at college, letting him get on with his life as she took over the Greek House. “I hope she’s
“Well, I do. Don’t be a hater ‘cause I’m honest.”
For heaven’s sake...
While I wouldn’t use the term ‘hot’ at this stage of Zoey’s life, she was definitely a child I’d call ‘cute’.
Adorable is also appropriate. Look at those cute widdle ears and those big blue eyes. Gotta love cute
Cute as a button and mean as a hornet. Zoey’s personality turned out to be 5 Neat, 5 Outgoing, 9 Active, 5
Playful and 1 Nice.
Completely on her own, Zoey started making friends. Going up to Parker Parker and pulling on his pant leg,
she demanded to be picked up.
“Well hello, little one. I’m Uncle Parker. No remember, no matter what anyone says, nudity is OKAY. It’s
completely natural, right?”
All in all, the party was a complete success. The cops even came to break it up at midnight. You know how
out of hand those toddler birthday parties get.
The next span of time was spent helping Zoey learn everything she needed to in her toddler years. Even
though Professor Kelly teased him about how much work a baby was, Taylor quite happily stepped in to be
the one to teach Zoey most of her toddler skills.
“Wha...” Kelly blinked down at her stomach. “Taylor! I’m pregnant! How did this happen!?”
For an intelligent sim, Professor Kelly could be a bit dense at times. It wasn’t like she and Taylor were being
cautious in their attempts at having another child.
“Woo! We’re gonna have a baby! We’re gonna have a baby! VO GERBITS!” Even with the mystifying shock
Professor Kelly professed, she was delighted that they had conceived another baby.
“Kelly, uhm.. maybe.. maybe you shouldn’t dance quite like that. It can’t be good for the baby, can it?”
Zoey may have been a bit too young to understand why her mother was dancing, but she could at least get
into the whole dancing thing.
Isn’t toddler dancing one of the cutest things you’ve ever seen?
Time marches on, and it was soon time to throw another birthday party. Everyone was invited, both old
college friends, and new townie friends. Professor Kelly even relented and let Taylor invite Cherry this time.
It seems like just yesterday she was a cute little baby. Oh wait, that was yesterday. Either way, Zoey grew
up into an adorable child. One of the cutest I’ve ever had, certainly.
“Hey, you’re the voice daddy calls ‘voice-in-my-head’, right? Can I just call you voice?”
“Alright! Want some cake?”
Over in the kitchen, Cherry sat munching on some potato chips. Or possibly cookies. They are
indistinguishable from chips.
“So. This is what they call ‘domestic bliss’? Man, to think that this all could have been mine. Stinky diapers,
spoiled bottles, tacky kitchen furniture, full time job. Yeesh. What the heck was I thinking? I’m glad he
didn’t want me.”
Ahh Cherry. The tact of romance sim faced with domestic bliss. Not this generation at least.
Soon after Zoey’s birthday party, Professor Kelly gave birth to their second daughter, Victoria Legacina.
Being that the narrator is a bit new at this, she forgot to get pictures of the birth, or any decent pictures of
Victoria as a baby. This is probably the best one, where Professor Caryl came to visit and took it upon
herself to feed the baby.
With Zoey a child and in school, it was time to ensure that she got the best education possible. This meant
inviting the headmaster of the local private school over. BJ Ryan apparently drew the short straw.
“Man, I’ve heard what nightmares some of these legacy families can be. I’m really not looking forward to
this. If I don’t make it out alive, tell my mother I loved her.”
BJ, you’re being overly dramatic. There are no cowplants on this lot anyway.
When all was said and done, the tour had been given, the meal had been served (unburnt) and BJ was
“Mrs. Legacina, we’ll be proud to admit young Zoey to our student body. The Legacinas are just the type of
family our school looks to foster.”
“Uhm.. Thanks, I think, Mr. Ryan.”
Babies grow so fast, and it was soon time to have another party. In most sim homes I’ve observed (played),
the baby-toddler transition is a quiet one, shared among the immediate family and perhaps a close friend or
two. Not among the Legacinas. Put two popularity sims in a house and EVERYTHING is an opportunity to
have a party.
This time Professor Kelly took the honors of inviting the guests. Continuing to work her way towards her
lifetime goal of having twenty best friends, she invited some new folks, including the infamous Sandy Bruty.
Victoria apparently did not want to grow up, though. The first birthday cake earned cheering and singing,
but she refused to be tossed. Taylor realized she needed a diaper change and a bottle first. Throughout this
whole process, the entire party followed him around, continuing to cheer and try and encourage Victoria into
Eventually, she gave in and transitioned into a toddler.
Again, it was Taylor who took on the responsibility of seeing that Victoria learned everything she needed to.
Although she was almost identical* to Zoey, she also seemed to want to take her own sweet time learning
*Curse of the Clones - I misunderstood the steps needed to be taken to avoid having the second child be a
clone of the first, so Zoey and Victoria ended up with the exact same personality.
Despite her stubbornness, Taylor eventually succeeded in making sure Victoria learned everything she
should to become a happy child.
Just in time, too. Again, all the familiar faces were invited, turning the birthday into a festive event.
Charlie watched on with a grin, “Man, I hope she ends up hot too. It’ll be like living with twins. Whoa
Charlie! Come on man, she’s a toddler. It’s kinda creepy.
“Look, just because a guy can plan for the future doesn’t mean you should hate on him.”
Man, I’m glad my founder wasn’t female. I probably would have married you in, and who knows what that
would have led to.
“Good reading for sure.”
Victoria transitioned without a hitch and quickly introduced herself to everyone, including Charlie.
“Hi, I’m Victoria.” She looked him up and down and stated succinctly, “I’m going to marry you.”
“Whoa.. hang on a sec, kid. Voice was calling me creepy, now you’re creeping me out. Who said anything
about marriage?” Charlie was getting a little nervous.
“Don’t worry. You’ll like it. First I gotta grow up, though. Okay, bye mister. I gotta go eat cake.”
“Taylor?” Professor Kelly mused thoughtfully after everyone had gone home, “Do you think we should have
“Gah.. no. I’m happy with two. Those two are going to be a handful on their own.” Taylor continued painting
“Oh well. I suppose you’re right.” There was a long, thoughtful pause. “Does this mean we shouldn’t
woohoo as much anymore?”
“Wha? Oh heck no. We can have a dozen more kids if no more kids means no more woohoo.”
Luckily for Taylor, more woohoo didn’t necessarily mean more kids. The two he had were quite enough.
“Listen lady, I know they hired you to watch me while they’re both at work, but I don’t want your pies, your
crepes, or your friendship. Someday, when I rule the world.. No, not the world, the UNIVERSE, you’re gonna
have to go into hiding. Zoey told me how you put me on the floor and left rotten food all over the house.”
“Mr. Legacina, that Nanny looked a touch frightened when she ran out of here. Is there anything else I
should know?” BJ had come by to see whether they wanted to allow Victoria to come to their school as well.
“Oh, it was probably nothing. You know those nannies and their bl... bingo nights.” Taylor cast a skyward
glance towards the ceiling and the girls’ room above. He could command an army, but he couldn’t control
two small girls.
“In that case, we’ll be proud to admit Victoria to our ranks.”
Oddly enough, as mean as the two girls were, they got along famously. They often played cops and robbers
in the yard, shooting and killing each other continuously. What was funny was that the winner would always
run over and KICK the one lying on the ground. They thought this was hilarious and did it for hours on end.
“Hey Zoey. The voice says you’re gonna be heir, ‘cause you were first born and we’re ‘xactly the same.”
Victoria commented this as they played, her toy horse stomping peasants into the ground.
“Yeah. I don’t think it matters, though. I mean, you can still try and take over the world even if you’re not
heir. Daddy said something about the not-heir getting something called motherlode, which sounds way cool.”
Zoey’s rocketship blasted off into space, hurtling towards an unsuspecting space station about to be
exploded into smithereens.
“Universe, Zoey. I want to rule the Universe.”
Evil incarnate and the best of friends.
Well, I guess I shouldn’t call them evil. They’re not exactly evil. They just have a different way of looking at
Being popularity sims, Taylor and Professor Kelly often brought friends from work home. One of the friends
that often accompanied Professor Kelly was Ahbijeet Depiesse.
“Hi Mr. Depiesse. Are you staying for dinner again tonight?”
“Hiya Zoey. Hey Zoey, did I ever tell you about the time I was in the 18th Airborne Infantry and we went up
against the Gnomes of Hochtenstein?”
“Yes Mr. Depiesse. Several times.”
“Oh.” He paused, and then started in on the story anyway, “It was a horribly stormy night, but it was perfect
cover for our planes...”
The years of Zoey’s childhood had raced by, and now it was time to grow into a teenager. The regular crew
was there, as might be expected. Man, these parties were getting to be old hat. It’s definitely a good thing
for the narrator’s sanity that there weren’t more children.
Taylor whispers, “Psst, voice-in-my-head. I know for a fact that you like the parties as much as we do. So
“WOO! I’m a teenager! Look at me, Victoria! I’m a teenager. I’m HOT!” The candles were blown out and
Zoey quickly raced into the kitchen to tell her best friend and little sister.
“Yeah, big deal. You’ve got boobs now. I’ll get them too. Now stand back. I’m trying to cause my brain to
develop mind control powers by forcing the blood to my head.”
Out in the living room, Professor Kelly kicked the party into high gear by starting to freestyle. This
apparently is a great party pasttime, since everyone gets entertained and starts taking turns with their own
“Yo, Professor Kelly in the HOUSE! I got two girls, I got my man, I got my friends, I got my phone. Try and
take them from me and I’ll growl like a dog with a bone!”
“Parker Parker speaking now, and I’m gonna tell ya totally how! I’m wearin’ clothes ‘cause the man says he
arrest me, but I don’t feel me ‘less little Parker Parker is swingin’ free.”
Ivy looked at Taylor, “Is he rapping about his .. uhm.. member?”
Taylor blinked, “Huh? Oh, yeah. That’s Parker.” As if that explained everything.
“Sandy Bruty, hot patootie! Big fish lips, and killer hips!”
“Kelly.. you can stop now. Besides, I’ve had a hand in some rather well known legacies myself. It’s not like
my looks were a detriment to them.” Sandy knew Kelly really didn’t mean any harm, but she did get a bit
After the party, Zoey spent most of the evening checking herself out in the mirror.
“Daaaamn am I hot. Look out boys, here I come! Hey! Maybe daddy will let me borrow a tank or at least a
bazooka. That’ll be sure to attract some hot boys, and then we can go blow stuff up!”
For the record, Zoey rolled Pleasure and her lifetime want is to become a General, just like her daddy. To be
quite honest, I’m kinda scared at the idea of a pleasure sim who wants to be in the military. You know there
has to be a certain enjoyment of explosives in that case.
Speaking of the military...
Taylor had reached the top of his career and earned his lifetime want, but had started to feel some pressure
about his line of work.
“Look Taylor. Wasimington brass just doesn’t see eye to eye with you. Can’t you let it go and move on?” Ivy
was probably his closest friend at work.
“It’s not fair, Ivy. It was a brilliant idea. Cell phones for everyone in the military was a perfect idea. I’m just
going to retire early and go into a different line of work.” Taylor had made up his mind.
Luckily for him, it was a smooth transition from the military to the world of high business. After dealing with
generals, politicians and foreign operatives, dealing with some businessmen was a piece of cake.
Subsequently, he also earned a big bonus right off the bat, which ended up helping finish off the Legacina
While Taylor switched jobs, the girls continued on with their daily routines, including playing chess and
cheating horribly with each other.
“Zoey, I don’t see anything over there.”
“Keep looking, Vic. I’m sure I saw a social bunny with your name on it.”
“What do you mean it’s snowing outside? We don’t have seasons yet.”
“I swear! I just saw some snowflakes fall.” Victoria quickly swapped a couple of pieces.
They did this constantly with each other.
On the night before Victoria’s birthday, Professor Kelly began having nightmares. Something was wrong and
it worked its way deep into her psyche. The only thing she could get from the dream, though, was that
something was going to happen to Sandy.
Sandy was at the party the following night, but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. In fact, it seemed like it
was destined to be a roofraiser party.
“C’mon, mom. We’re just waiting for you!” Despite her nonplussed attitude towards Zoey’s growth into a
teenager, Victoria honestly couldn’t wait to ‘get boobs’ either.
Victoria grew up well, and with some style. Most teens seem to grow up in rather hideous outfits that they
throw on without thinking about it. Not our Victoria. She chose one of my favorite styles.
She also, for the record, rolled Fortune, with the lifetime want to earn $100,000. She may need to take a
lesson or two with Dr. Evil if she thinks that will help her take over the Universe.
At one point during the party, Professor Kelly tried to talk to Sandy about her concerns, but Sandy was more
interested in starting a pillow fight than talking about silly nightmares.
Ominous music played in the distance. What? Why are you looking at me like that?
It would be the last birthday the house would see for a while to come. After all, both girls would be headed
to college before turning into adults, and it was still some time before Taylor and Professor Kelly would be
facing their own birthdays to elderhood.
The girls helped make sure it was a party to remember.
Life settled into a semblance of normal, with everyone working on their different skills and careers. Ahbijeet
was still a regular visitor, but they learned the depths of his gnome problem when he began stealing their
lawn gnomes, right in front of them.
“Hehehe... evil, evil things. Must .. destroy...”
“Dad, Mr. Deppiesse is talking to himself again.” Victoria whispered to her father as they both painted.
“Shhh. I know, honey. Just ignore him. We’ll get another one when he takes this one home.”
“Must... kill... them all...”
“Psst. Vic.. Mr. Deppiesse is taking another gnome.”
“I know. Dad says just ignore him. He’s harmless. If he comes near me, though, this brush is going into his
Zoey, being a pleasure sim, had boys and dates on her mind. Eventually, when no suitable boys were
presenting themselves at her beck and call, she consulted with an expert on the issue.
“I know the perfect boy for you, my dear. You two will get along just fabulously. Now, if we could just have
that donation we discussed?” The old lady was a shrewd one.
“Okay, okay. Just as long as I get my first kiss, ‘kay?”
Unfortunately, Zoey and her blind date, Kent Midlock, didn’t really see eye to eye. Before they even made it
into the front door, Zoey had pulled him into a headlock and started noogieing him.
The gypsy rolled her eyes and walked away, “Good luck with that one.”
Kent eventually did make it into the house, but only to come face-to-face with the other Legacina sister.
“I heard you wouldn’t kiss my sister, dork. Do you know what I do to people who mess with my sister?”
“AAGH! You people are crazy! Please stop giving me noogies and let me go home!”
Eventually they let Kent out of the house alive.
Trying again, Zoey started hanging around with George McCarthy, a sim she met downtown. They seemed
to get along well enough, and he even proposed that they go out on a date that night.
“Well, it’s after curfew...”
“So? I didn’t think you’d let that stop a girl like you.”
“Well, no, I didn’t mean that. I just... Of course I’ll go out with you.”
That night, Zoey made sure she was ready for George to pick her up. She even conned her parents into
letting her meditate out by the mailbox. It was some excuse about needing to see the stars or some such.
They fell for it, and she got to sneak off into the night with George.
Unfortunately, the date didn’t go nearly as well as she planned.
“Oh man. They’re gonna kill me. They’re gonna ground me and then kill me. Then they’re going to ground
me again. And I still didn’t even get a kiss out of him. Come on, I’m supposed to be the hot one.”
Looking up at the sky, Zoey whined, “Voice, you said I was the heir. Why can’t I get any of the good stuff to
happen to me? I just wanted a date and I ended up getting busted by the cops.”
Cheer up, kid. Life gets better after high school, I promise. College will probably be a ton of fun for you.
The next morning, Zoey contemplated the way things were going. There was still a little bit of time before
she needed to leave to go to college, but what would it hurt to go early? After all, the voice said college was
a lot more fun than high school.
I didn’t quite mean it like that, Zoey.
“Yeah, but I got busted for sneaking out on a date. If I go to college, I can stay up as late as I want and do
whatever I want, can’t I? And heck, I can even woohoo, right?”
“That settles it, then. I’m going to college and no one can stop me. I’m outta here, man.”
Wow. I never thought it would be that easy to convince a pleasure sim to go to college.
“Wait.. what did you say?”
Too late, kid. You already called the taxi.
“Maaaan. This sucks. Now I’ve got to go to four more years of school, just because some stupid voice in my
head conned me into thinking it was the right idea. Stupid voice.”
Nyah nyah. I know you are, but what am I?
With Zoey off to college, Victoria decided to do some hormone inducing experimentation of her own.
“So, George. I hear you got busted before you could kiss my sister. That true?” Victoria batted her eyelashes
at the young store clerk.
“Well, I meant to kiss her, so don’t noogie me, okay?” George was a bit nervous. He’d heard about the
Kent’s experience with the Legacina girls.
“Okay. But you’re going to make up for it by kissing at least one Legacina, and I don’t mean my dad.” The
hearts began flying as Victoria made her move. Subtle as a sledgehammer, that one.
Luckily for George, he was agreeable to this particular proposition.
“It feels so strange to have our daughters growing up like this, Kelly. I mean, it seems like just yesterday
they were in diapers and playing cops and robbers.” Professor Kelly and Taylor took advantage of their
nearly empty nest to make with the nookie in random places in the house again.
“Well, we *could* always keep trying for another baby.” Kelly smiled slyly as she leaned in to nuzzle her
“I thought you were a little too close to your birthday to have another baby, sweetie?”
“Sure, but that doesn’t mean we can’t try, does it?” Kelly arched an eyebrow at Taylor.
“Oh... OH! Heheh. Woo and a hoo, then, hmm?”
“OH MY GOD, Zoey! You will never believe what they were doing when I got home from school today.
RIGHT THERE ON THE POOL TABLE!!!! I’m like never going to be able to play pool again.” Victoria called her
sister in a quite frantic state.
“I don’t care if it’s early, I am so coming to join you today. I don’t want to see wrinkly old butts doing that
type of thing again, and certainly not the wrinkly old butts of my parents.”
Before the end of the day, the taxi arrived to whisk Victoria off to join her sister at Sim State. While both
parents felt a little sad to be wishing their baby daughter farewell as she went off to college, Victoria could
hear the giddy giggles before the door closed behind her.
“Gah. And they say teenagers are hormonal.”
And so concludes the first chapter of the Pseudo Legacy. Taylor and Professor Kelly both succeeded at their
lifetime wants, while their two, nearly identical daughters grew up and went off to college to start their own
lives. What will the future hold? Will the enemies of Taylor’s past resurface? Can the prophecy handle a
violent pleasure sim as its next heir? Will Taylor and Professor Kelly ever tire of ‘Trying for Baby’?
I hope you enjoyed this first foray into the world of legacies and join me for Chapter Two, which should be
up relatively soon. Please feel free to leave a comment in my guest book.
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