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Love Languages

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Relating to people with love languages different than your own. How to make anyone feel loved, no matter their background or differences.

Relating to people with love languages different than your own. How to make anyone feel loved, no matter their background or differences.

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  • 1. LanguagesofLove
    by
    Melanie Shoults
  • 2. LoveLanguages
    How people receive and give love
    Foreign Languages
    People speak how they want to hear
    Meeting emotional needs
    Criticism = pleading for love
  • 3. TheLoveTank
    How much love we can hold
    How loved we feel
    More love = Fuller Tank
    Less love = Empty Tank
    What empties a tank:
    Feeling despised (not just unloved)
    Draining day
    Emotional outbursts
    “Tank Check”  0-10
  • 4. Wordsof Affirmation
    Compliments
    Encouraging Words
    Motivation
    What they want
    Expressing Disappointment
    Lovingly
    Appreciation
  • 5. Words of Affirmation
    NOT:
    Nagging
    Flattery
    At the top of your voice
  • 6. Words of Affirmation
    How to Express Love:
    Keep a notebook
    Hear on TV
    Read in books
    Overhear from a friend
    Things they do well
    Positive things/Affirmations
    In public and otherwise
    Write a love letter, note, poem, etc.
    Note: Words are IMPORTANT!
  • 7. Quality Time
    Giving your undivided attention
    Listening, not analyzing
    Maintaining eye contact
    Not limited to location
    Conversation and activities
  • 8. Quality Time
    NOT:
    Watching TV
    Analyzing
    Interrupting
    • Goal: Spend time together
  • Quality Time
    How to Express Love
    Talk to each other
    Go out to lunch or dinner
    Have a discussion at dinner
    Play games, build puzzles, etc.
    Go on a picnic
    Go for a walk
    Call on lunch break, leave voicemail messages
    Whatever your spouse likes to do
    Start a garden, wash the car,
    Unlimited possibilities!
  • 9. Receiving Gifts
    Gifts are symbols of love
    Inexpensive is okay
    Not only for special occasions
    Being with them isa gift
  • 10. Receiving Gifts
    How to Express Love:
    Keep a notebook
    Parade of gifts
    Flower at the park/neighbors yard/etc.
    Handmade cards, paintings, wood carvings, ceramics
    “Time” coupons
    Give to charity “in honor of”
    Something living: tree, flowering bush
  • 11. ActsofService
    Anything to help someone
    Re-examine stereotypes
    Realize the importance
  • 12. ActsofService
    How to Express Love:
    Ask for a list of ten things for the next month, prioritized (you do everything!)
    Keep a list of requests or “nags”
    “Honey, I love you so much. I really appreciate you. I’d love to thank you in advance for (mowing the lawn).”
    Wash the car
    Cook a meal
    Vacuum the floor
    Walk the dog
    Take out the garbage
    Change the baby’s diaper…… The possibilities are endless!
  • 13. Physical Touch
    A child’s need
    Can communicate love or hatred
    Many dialects
    Explicit
    Massage
    Implicit
    Sitting together
  • 14. Physical Touch
    NOT:
    Withdrawing physically
    Sexual harassment
    Cold shoulder
    Affairs
    Love Tank: Explosion!
  • 15. Physical Touch
    How To:
    Ask your spouse
    Holding hands
    Play “footsie” under table
    Shoulder massage
    Foot massage (unless ticklish)
    Arm around shoulder (in public)
    Fingers through hair
  • 16. Limitations
    Everything out of love
    Nothing in return
    Not manipulation
    The big word: LOVE
  • 17. Discover your Love Language
    Two types of people
    Never loved
    Very loved
    Take the Quiz
    Bilingual People
  • 18. Why This is Important to Me
    • I read the book by Gary Chapman
    • 19. Applicable to all people
    • 20. Not just significant-others:
    Parents
    Grandparents
    Siblings
    Co-workers
    Friends
    Anybody you interact with on a daily basis
  • 21. Additional Resource
    • 5lovelanguages.com
    Take online quiz
    Conference info
    Buy the books
    Gary Chapman’s blog
    And more!
  • 22. Works Cited
    • Chapman, Gary D. Five Love Languages: how to express heartfelt commitment to your mate. Chicago: Northfield Pub., 1995. Print.
    • 23. http://www.hybridjungle.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/full_tank.png
    • 24. http://creativeunity.com/hikano/couple%20words%20of%20affirmation.jpg
    • 25. http://www.marriageandbeyond.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/couch-time.jpg
    • 26. http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscartoons/cartoonists/mbc/lowres/mbcn516l.jpg
    • 27. http://janeheller.mlblogs.com/nagging%20wife-saidaonline.jpg
    • 28. http://abbafund.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/feet.jpg
    • 29. http://creativeunity.com/hikano/holding%20hands.jpg
    • 30. http://theyhadsaid.files.wordpress.com/2009/10/2.jpg
    • 31. http://www.lubin.net/pages/FamilyPix/lizhug.jpg
    • 32. http://www.blurtit.com/var/question/q/q1/q15/q151/q1514/q151461_180312_158_2325837263_7db499f8f5.jpg
    • 33. http://fysop.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/words-12.jpg
    • 34. http://clearingspace.blogs.com/photos/uncategorized/a_gift_of_love_1.jpg
    • 35. http://www.weddingbee.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/23/flora4.jpg