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Complain & Resolve (2000)
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Complain & Resolve (2000)

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Transcript

  • 1. Complain&Resolve Business Proposal
  • 2. Human Nature Talk, talk, talk. Blah, blah, blah Complain, complain Chat, chat, chat Microsoft this, software that
  • 3. Corporate Vision„ Harness human potential„ Provide outlet, forum„ Attract special interest groups„ Focus attention on “ills of society”„ Make money
  • 4. Funding Proposal„ $500K to attract even greater fools„ $2.5 M for attractive slides and web graphics„ $45M for unnavigable website„ $1.5M to Empress and Minions (aka MITEFC)„ $100M for consulting division to do redesign
  • 5. Organization < N a m e > .c o m W e b la c k e y s S p e c ia l p r o j e c t s Counsel B ook cooke rs D e v e lo p e r s P h y s ic a l F a r R ig h t L itig a tio n S h a re h o ld e r D e s tr o y e r s C h e m ic a l F a r L e ft L itig a tio n O ff- & O n s h o re T a x M e n ta l A ll O th e r M a tte rs R e a lh o ld in g s S p ir itu a l N o th in g M a tte rs P e tty C a s h B ills (L a r g e ) B ill (S m a ll) B ill (G a te s ) O th e r g a te s
  • 6. Product Rollout„ Complain&Resolve.com ƒ Polite discourse„ Grumble.com ƒ Silent majority„ BitchBitchBitch.com ƒ Far left and right„ Revenge.com ƒ Gun and SUV owners„ Suethebastards.com ƒ Pros and cons
  • 7. Revenue Profile V IV VI III II I
  • 8. Uses of Funds„ $50K incorporation„ $250K offshore web development„ $10M salaries and professional services„ $40M pointless advertising„ $100M offshore entities (inc. tolls & parking)„ $2M travel
  • 9. Cashflow Profile I IPO SHLS II III VI IV V
  • 10. MITEFC Board Participation„ Moral and spiritual guidance„ Passing the hat„ Corporate donors/sponsors ƒ Anonymity guaranteed ƒ Be generous ƒ Be merciful