How to give awesome, effective feedback

SpeakStrong and a GPS Guideto awesome, effective feedbackThere may be a hundredways to get there, butturning into oncomingtraffic isn’t one of them.You made a wrong turn.Turn right NOW Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Why is the GPS metaphor useful? Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

The limits to the metaphor are instructive, too I’m sensing you need the scenic route today. Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Why did I invite my community to submit GPS phrases for sensitive people? What would a sensitive GPS say? Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Why did I invite my community torate and comment on the phrases? Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Walking across the coals of feedback requires the right state of mind Working WITH instead of playing gotcha AGAINST Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Some comments shifted theconversation from a creative, imaginative state to: Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

The GPS Metaphor at its best:“You’re the driver and I navigate” • I tell you what I see • I lay out options and probable outcomes • I recalibrate when necessary • I may SpeakStrong about the effect and probable impact of your choices, but I respect your right to choose Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

GPSes know a lot but aren’t infalliblePeople who offer greatfeedback trust theirknowledge and stilllisten to feedback.In fact, they likely trusttheir knowledgeBECAUSE they listen tofeedback. Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

We sometimes give our GPSes too much authority over us“You need to get asmarter GPS or think foryourself a little more.”Who’s ultimatelyresponsible for theresults? Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

I’d love to go thatway, but my GPS ladywill yell at me if I do. Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

GPSes need help to help • Keep them updated • Learn how they communicate and how they work • Express our routing and communication preferences Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

When we trust ourselves and our GPS we’re freer to explore and aspire I’d love to go that way, and my GPS lady will help me do it. Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

The qualities of the contributionsand the qualities of great feedback* Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Contribution and feedback qualities Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Prepare to offer feedback Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Adopt a mindset of appreciation Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Prepare to offer feedback Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Use your imagination to put yourself in their shoes Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

3. Prepare phrases that…Are Avoid being• Short • Wordy• Specific • Vague• Targeted • Random• Solution-oriented • Problem-oriented• Sincerely say what you mean • Brutally honest• Personal • Clinical, impersonal• Gracious • Condemning• Consistent • Problem-focused• Joining • Judging• Humble • Arrogant, teachy preachy Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Phrase checklistFactual, informative and true  HeadAligned, and resonant  HeartUseful, forward focused  Will Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

George Davidson School: “Whenever deposits were made, hearts were added to the bulletin board. But when withdrawals were made, hearts were removed.” Deposits Withdrawals Kindness and courtesy Unkindness and discourtesy Keeping promises Breaking Promises Clarifying and Honoring Violating Expectations Expectations Loyalty to the absent Disloyalty/Duplicity Making apologies Pride, Conceit, Arrogance Clear Expectations Unclear Expectations Accepting Responsibility Blaming Others Seeking First to understand Seeking First to be understood Honesty and openness Manipulation Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

SpeakStrong PrinciplesFeedback is as strong as it needs to be and no strongerFeedback is as long as it needs to be and no longer Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

4. SpeakStrong: Say what you mean and meanwhat you say without being mean when you say it Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Be sensitive but don’t pander There may be a hundred ways to get there, but turning into oncoming traffic isn’t one of them. You made a wrong turn. Turn right NOW Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Cookie and the Cocoa Puffs: Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Which way are you feeding it? Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

5. Listen to their feedback about your feedback and adjust Everything says something If the student hasn’t learned, the teacher hasn’t taughtResistance to feedback is feedback Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Some feedback/feed-forward phrases Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

Remember:Meryl Runion Rose, Chief Iteration Officer, SpeakStrong Please share freely with credit.

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How to give awesome, effective feedback

by Meryl Runion Rose on Aug 15, 2012

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