Emotional Intelligence Workshop explained

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Emotional Intelligence (EQ) can be even MORE important than Intellectual Intelligence (IQ), per Dr. Daniel Goleman. Learn how to use your right-brain to live fully (and wisely), heal your inner …

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) can be even MORE important than Intellectual Intelligence (IQ), per Dr. Daniel Goleman. Learn how to use your right-brain to live fully (and wisely), heal your inner child, and create the life you want to live!

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  • 1. New Directions Workshops “ A Journey to the Center of your Feelings” Give us a weekend and we can help you to learn to live the life you truly desire; live it powerfully and differently from your past. Would you like to know how?
  • 2. Are you as happy as you want to be, or know you can be?
  • 3. Are you living your life to the fullest, or are your fears and ‘shoulds’ controlling you?
  • 4. Are you carrying around deep emotional pain that just won’t go away?
  • 5.
    • Are you overwhelmed with grief and pain and feel as though you can never be happy again?
  • 6. Do you. .
    • Feel free to be yourself?
    • Control your feelings and emotions, or do they control you?
    • Feel your feelings fully or are you shut down and out of touch?
    • Abuse alcohol or drugs?
    • Have thoughts of suicide?
    • Have difficulty controlling your anger?
    • Find yourself in unhealthy relationships, choosing abusive partners over and over?
  • 7. We can help you find the answers you seek and the happiness you crave. "New Directions Intensive Weekend Workshops"
  • 8. What does this workshop offer that is so unique? New Directions takes a unique but really simple approach to helping people understand how their current decisions are influenced by your feelings and emotions – both past and present. In a controlled and safe environment, the instructors lead you and your group thru lecture, sharing and visualizations before embarking on the most incredibly life-changing exercise… the Statement of Direction. We’ll help you identify what events, feelings and behaviors are acting as barriers to your happiness and success. Students learn the wonder and purpose of each emotion, as well as to separate and utilize them effectively in day-to-day life and relationships. The key to our success is working with individuals to help them “break through” their barriers to emotional health and free expression. The magic of the Group works wonders on each participant. You will come away feeling more Connected, like you Belong -- Not Alone anymore – one of the most amazing feelings known to man.
  • 9. 5 Steps to Healthy Feelings 1. Acknowledge & Accept who you are, where you’ve been and all the feelings you have stored in your body. 2. Express & Release pent-up, unexpressed, life-defeating feelings from your past. 3. Learn to Manage and Regulate your heart and your feelings in healthy, productive ways. 4. Replace your inner child’s pain with self-love, acceptance and compassion 5. Live your life, feeling fully, happy, successful and FREE! Connect, Love, Live!
  • 10. Often events happen in our lives which we have no control over - As a child, as a young adult, and even as adults. Our future decisions can be influenced by these events.
  • 11.
    • Are you aware of what events have taken place in your life that are getting in the way of your success and happiness today ?
  • 12.
    • Moving?
    • Death?
    • Physical abuse?
    • Molest, Rape, Incest?
    • Child of Alcoholic/Addict?
    • Abandonment?
    • Divorce?
  • 13. Each of these are events that can have an affect on us long after the event has passed. They can influence our decisions about ourselves, our relationships, and our environment, and can keep us stuck in a cycle of pain, grief, fear, anger or rage.
  • 14. To understand the behaviors that are contributing to our unhappiness, we must first examine the events that shaped them and the Meanings we put on these events… Dr. Phil calls them “Life Defining Events”
  • 15.
    • By examining the ‘events’ that took place in our life we can come to understand the purpose for our ‘behaviors,’ and begin to change them. Awareness is the first step to change. We begin to understand why we behave or react in certain ways by looking at the
    • following model:
    • EVENT -> MEANING -> FEELING -> BEHAVIOR
  • 16.
    • Events: Events or traumas take place in our life.
    • Meaning: Following such events we instinctively place a meaning on them – meanings
    • about ourselves and our environment.
    • Feeling: The meaning we place to such events, stirs
    • in us emotions or feelings about what
    • we have experienced, how we feel about ourselves and our environment.
    • Behavior: The feelings we experience influences
    • our behaviors and decisions .
  • 17. Until we figure out how we got from “ Event ” to “ Behavior ” we often have a difficult time changing those things that are not working for us and preventing us from achieving what we want from our lives. At the New Directions Workshop you will learn the T ools necessary to change troublesome behaviors by becoming aware of where they originated, and examining the feelings at the root of them.
  • 18. Let’s see how it works. . .
  • 19. Event:
    • “ Christine” was a petite little girl, always small for her age, and never grew past 5’ 2”. At the age of 4 she was molested by a 15 year old neighbor, then again at the age of 9 by her stepfather and grandfather - whom she adored .
  • 20. Meaning:
    • What meaning did Christine place on the
    • events from her childhood?
    • What did they mean about her?
    • Because of the events (her molestation), Christine made the decision that she was not safe, that her parents would not protect her, that girls who are little or petite can be hurt, and that men are to
    • be feared.
  • 21. “ Children are wonderful observers, but terrible interpreters. If they don't understand, they'll fill in the blanks, often in error...and they'll live based on these decisions and beliefs." ~ Doc Downing, LMFT Do you want to live your life based on feelings and decisions of a 5-year-old?
  • 22. We’ve discussed so far how children interpret their environment and personalize events that take place. Now lets look at what Christine Felt as a result of these events and the Meanings she gave them. . .
  • 23. Feeling:
    • As a result of being molested (Event), and the decisions she made about herself and her value (Meaning). From these meanings, Christine was afraid (Feelings), she felt guilty and ashamed, she felt as if she had no control over what people did “to” her. She became defensive, and rageful (Behavior)– which lasted well into adulthood.
    • As a result of her experiences she also felt mistrustful and fearful of men.
  • 24. Behavior:
    • Because being “petite” and feeling helpless was unacceptable to Christine, she began to use her anger as a protection. It was impossible to grow beyond her 5’ 2” stature, so she used her anger to make herself appear “bigger” to those around her. She became mistrustful, she became defensive, and she began to have serious issues with anger management, which became problematic when she began having children. As a result of the molest Christine was unable to fully enjoy an intimate/sexual relationship with her husband, which put a great deal of strain
    • on her marriage.
  • 25. How did New Directions Help?
    • Christine : “When I first walked into New Directions, at 5’ 2” and 130 pounds, I carried the energy of a giant. I was suspicious, I was guarded, and I was doubtful that one weekend was going to make much difference when nothing else to that point had. I had all but given up hope that I would ever be a fully functioning wife and mother, but my mother had paid my way through the course and when I commit to something I usually follow through come hell or high water. That weekend was the beginning of a journey that eventually led me to be able to heal my wounded spirit, to find happiness in my life, to enjoy my husband and my children, to change my negative behaviors, to let go of all the negative labels placed on me by family members, which I had accepted and even strove to live up to! I began to grow in my understanding and to increase my capacity to love and accept myself, and more importantly, to actually feel grateful for all the things I had lived through as a child and as an adult, because it was those experiences that gave me the ability to protect my children in a way that I had not been protected, and to give them what I never had - - Two parents living under the same roof, safety, healthy role models about love and sexuality, and the freedom to express their feelings…”
    • Continued - -
  • 26.
    • “ . . .This growth did not happen over night. I cannot pinpoint the exact moment that I felt “healed” and that I could have a healthy relationship with my husband and the kids. It was a series of small steps that I took over a period of time as I continued to return to the New Directions workshops. Until that time, I had read every book imaginable about healing from sexual abuse, I had spent thousands of dollars for therapy, but it was not until I took the New Directions course weekend that all that knowledge and therapy I had undergone truly began to take root. It was not until the workshop that I began to understand what had happened to me, why I behaved the way I did, and more importantly that what I did to survive as a child was truly amazing, because “I had survived it” without the use drugs and/or alcohol, and with a relatively healthy capacity to love. I just had to find a place that made it safe for me to express all of the emotions that had been stuck in my system as a result of my childhood traumas. Just as important was learning that each emotion has a specific feeling and purpose. I learned that I protected myself with my anger growing up, but that as an adult I am not living in the kind of emotional or physical peril I did as a child. Now, as an adult, I can choose who is safe and I don’t have to be angry all the time. I can still use my anger appropriately to protect my family, and myself, and to set boundaries for others, but it does not have to be overwhelming or rage filled, nor does my anger have to be a lifestyle. I can now show those people I choose to trust my vulnerable side. The techniques or “tools” I learned at New Directions changed my life and it can change yours as well!
    • I began as a student over 12 years ago with New Directions, and have continued to return to the workshops to assist others as they begin their journey to emotional wellness. Today, at 45 years of age I am FREE to live my life without the overwhelming pain, anger and depression.
    • ~ Christine H. – Fresno, California
  • 27. More True-Life Testimonials:
    • “ As a student I accomplished more in the 3-day New Directions experience than I had in 5 years of “working on myself.” It truly gave me personal power and a New Direction in my life.”
    •  
    • ~ Linda V.
  • 28.
    • “ I went to New Directions after my therapist had suggested it previously, but I never seemed to have a weekend free. Shortly after my separation a session came up on a weekend I had free. I didn’t feel I could handle it emotionally at the time, but walked in with great reluctance on Friday night and came out on Sunday with a lifetime of insight.
    •  
    • Never before had I been aware of the feelings and the power they carried inside me; especially anger and sadness. But the most important thing that I learned was that I needed to feel a whole range of feelings before I could become whole again.
    •  
    • It was a very scary position to be in, but facing the fear gave me the inner power and knowledge that the feelings of anger, fear, sadness, and being happy are within my control and gave me back some control over my own life.”
    •  
    • ~ Patrick S.
  • 29.
    • “ Many of my most genuine laughs, most joyous experiences, and most human moments have been among friends during a New Directions weekend. I have also brought my husband and other good friends to New Directions in order to offer them a new discovery of themselves - - the best gift anyone could receive.”
    •  
    • ~ Julie B .
  • 30.
    • “ I want to say thank you for starting New Directions. I don’t think you fully appreciate what last weekend meant and did for me. I have recommended the program to my pastor and other friends and your ministry is in my prayers. Paula, you were correct in that I was sitting there Friday night as a block of stone, you just picked the wrong type. You said “granite” but I ended up being sandstone. I don’t know if you have been to Lake Powell in Arizona, but the canyons there are sandstone and quite beautiful. What formed their beauty was the flow of water. Why I say I was sandstone is that as everyone helped me lower my defenses and let my emotions show, the tears cut away at the rock and let me see who I am, and that I am all I need to be.”
    •  
    • ~ Garrick S.
  • 31.
    • “ New Directions has changed my life in many ways large and small. The first thing that happened to me in my first class (August 1989) on the very first night was the safety and security to finally begin to grieve the death of my mother (16 years from then). It was an incredible experience, such a relief and so cleansing. The next day I got to find out that I was not the only person there experiencing panic & anxiety and again was given the safety and security to work through the feelings without masking or running from the anxiety. So that was just my personal stuff, then my husband was there with me and we got to do a lot of work on our feelings about the relationship. It was a very busy weekend and I was validated, encouraged, and loved through it all.
    •  
    • New Directions gave me tools and taught me how to get through the hard times in my life. I also met wonderful people in the classes; many who I still have close and dear relationships with.”
    •  
    • ~Helen T.
  • 32.
    • “ I am able to make my life look like I want it to look. I am no longer depressed and only get angry appropriately. I can stand up for myself. I make things happen in my life, in my relationships, and in my work. I am nicer and more fun, and people like being around me more. I am truly happy and have been for years now. I am able to live on the coast (a long-term dream); I am in a wonderful long-term relationship. I am truly living my dream.
    • Thank you Matt and Paula.”
    •  
    • ~ Valerie G.
  • 33.
    • For over 17 years now, Matt and Paula Perelstein have been teaching others how to live happier, joyful, more powerful and successful lives!
    •  
    • The Perelsteins combine a unique blend of “attitude with heart” to encourage and push their students and clients. They’ll make it safe for you to be who you are, but they are also about Personal Responsibility – getting results without blaming or being a victim – sometimes the road is bumpy. Net result? They help people who are struggling for happiness to make their lives look, and more importantly “feel” the way they want them to feel.
    About us:
  • 34.
    • Matt and Paula have been working with the widely-published therapist, author, and leader in the human potential movement, M.K. “Doc” Downing, PhD, LMFT. Doc is the author of “Taking Control of Your Life” textbook and workbook, “Anatomy of a Victim” and “Doc’s Quotable Quotes” plus hundreds of articles. Doc Downing has made significant therapeutic inroads into human motivations and interactions using the Cognitive-Affective-Behavioral therapy model. Matt and Paula are taking Doc’s powerful concepts into clear, sustainable, memorable lessons for the general public.
    •  
  • 35.
    •  
    • Over 2,000 participants have come from all over the country to attend the New Directions workshops.
    • They change
    • people’s lives!
    •  
  • 36.  
  • 37.
    • We at “New Directions,” would like to offer you an extraordinary weekend workshop that will change your emotional life forever! By introducing you to:
    •  
    • “ The New Directions Journey
    • of Feeling and Healing.”
  • 38. Are you ready to take a New Direction ?
  • 39. New Directions Intensive Weekend Workshop   Registrant Fee - $399.00 (Payment plans available) Valentine’s Day Special, Feb. 18 Class only Buy-1-Get-1-Free!  
  • 40. Registrant Fee includes :
    • ·  Doc Downing’s book - “ Taking Control of Your Life .”
    • ·   Class Work Book.
    • ·   Certificate of completion.
    • ·   Unlimited attendance to workshops as an assistant and the opportunity to further your growth.
    • ·   Discounted tuition as a Reviewing Student.
  • 41. During the workshop you will learn. . .
    • How your childhood conditioning is affecting your feelings and beliefs today.
    • How to identify and manage your personal feelings and emotions.
    • How to release your hidden emotional blocks to success and happiness.
    • How to recognize your “emotional blueprint” or personality so you can build on your strengths and overcome your weaknesses.
    • How to use “spiritual laws” to create “real world” success.
    • How happy people think differently than everyone else. How to recondition your mind for “automatic” success.
  • 42. You will learn. . .
    •  
    • Specific feeling enhancement and feeling reduction strategies. 
    • How to drastically increase your “emotional quotient.”
    • “ The Four Steps to Learning” that are practiced by truly happy people. 
    • The underlying cause of almost all emotional issues.
    • A “feeling management” method that allows you to know what you feel,
    • accept those feelings, and express feelings in positive and healthy ways.
    • Ten ways to directly handle your feelings so you never get stuck in a
    • feeling again.
    • Learn why it is imperative to manage your feelings NOW even if you
    • don’t believe you have any problems.
  • 43. “ Try Something Different…”
    • “ If what you’re doing isn’t getting you what you need, try something different !”
    •  
    • ~ Doc Downing, PhD, LMFT
  • 44.
    • Once you’ve attended
    • the New Directions Intensive Weekend Workshop as a student , You will have an opportunity to return as often as you wish free of charge and continue on your journey to emotional wellness as an “ Assistant .”
    You've Only Just Begun!
  • 45.
    • As an assistant you will have an opportunity to continue to work on personal issues while assisting first-time students as they begin their own journey to wellness. By giving back, sharing your experiences, and continuing to assist, you cement the concepts you learned as a first-time student, as well as augment your own personal growth.
  • 46.
    • Your happiness can only grow to the extent that you do!
    •  
    • Join us!
    •  
  • 47.
    • 2GetHelp Therapy Centers
    • Fresno, CA 93711
    •  
    • Next ND class in Fresno
    • Feb. 18-20, 2011
    • Only 24 seats per class, so sign up early
  • 48.
    • “ Our mission is to educate and inspire people to live in their higher-self, based in feelings of courage, purpose and joy – not fear, need, and obligation.”
    •  
    • ~ Matt & Paula Perelstein
    Our Mission
  • 49.
    • For course registration or more information please contact:
    • [email_address] (916) 599-8597 NewDirectionsWorkshops.com