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# 10 ways to ruin your email newsletter...

# 10 ways to ruin your email newsletter

So I'm going to give you 10 ways to really make a mess out of your email newsletter. Maybe you hate creating newsletters and you want a way to make your boss stop asking you to do them. So in 10 minutes, you'll know exactly what not to do.

I see a lot of brilliantly ruined emails (hopefully none of yours!) so I had a lot to work with here.

## 10. Use modern CSS techniques

Make sure you use lots of floats and CSS positioning, background images and linked stylesheets. That will ensure that bits of your email appear in random spots, different for Outlook and Gmail and Lotus Notes.

## 9. Make everything an image!

This is a great way to prevent people accidentally seeing your content. Most of the major email clients won't show images by default and we can use that to our ruining advantage. Instead of some easily read copy explaining the value of the email, use a mammoth header image with no alt copy.

## 8. Just send an HTML version

It's easy to ruin email for people who work in certain businesses that block HTML , or people using older phones or even those neck beardy types who use Pine or Elm. Just don't send them a text version. They'll just get a beautiful empty email that is practically self deleting.

## 7. Design for the big screen

To really screw up an email, without it looking intentional, just design it to look best on your bosses 27" monitor. Then when you send it, the 20%~ of people who use mobile devices to read email will just get a tantalising glimpse of the top left corner.

## 6. Keep all the useful stuff way down the page

Still, making it for a big screen might make it work well for people who actually use big screens. Not to worry, we can defeat them by putting anything of value or interest waaay down the page. Just fill up the top with huge header images and a tedious "welcome" message that is the same every time.

## 5. Wait years before emailing

People still finding your emails useful despite your best efforts to ruin it? Send your email when they least expect it, years after they agreed to get them.

## 4. Save time by not testing

Hey, if it looks fine to you in the latest nightly build of Safari, I'm sure it will look fine on Lotus Notes too. By not testing in any email clients, you can save tons of time with the side benefit of a delightful surprise at all the different ways your email can be

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