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PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship
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PNAIS 2011 SDLC Bullying Bias and Allyship

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45 minute keynote presentation for the Pacific Northwest Association of Independent Schools' Middle School Student Diversity Leadership Conference. The cycle of oppression in the adult world is not …

45 minute keynote presentation for the Pacific Northwest Association of Independent Schools' Middle School Student Diversity Leadership Conference. The cycle of oppression in the adult world is not unlike the cycle of bullying in our schools. How can we move from being bystanders who help perpetuate the cycle into allies who interrupt it? How will this practice in our youth shape the adults we become later?

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  • Introduction - Who Am I? Why This Workshop? Goals and Outcomes?
  • 1. Stereotype - A preconceived or oversimplified generalization about an entire group of people without regard for their individual differences. While often negative, stereotypes may also be complimentary. Even positive stereotypes can have a negative impact however, simply because they are broad generalizations. The stereotypes we hold form the basis of our prejudices. 2. Prejudice - A conscious or unconscious negative belief about a whole group of people and its individual members. When the person holding the prejudice also has and uses the power to deny opportunities, resources or access to a person because of their group membership, there is discrimination. 3. Discrimination - Prejudice plus the power. Discrimination can take many forms, including racism, sexism, heterosexism, ableism, ageism, etc. Many acts of discrimination build up over time, perpetuated against one relatively less powerful social group by a more powerful social group, lead to a group of people being in a state of oppression. 4. Oppression - The systematic subjugation of a group of people by another group of people with access to social power, the result of which benefits one group over the other and is maintained by social beliefs and practices. Because oppression is institutionalized in our society, target group members often believe the messages and internalize the oppression. 5. Internalized Oppression - The "buying into" the elements of oppression by the target group. When target group members believe the stereotypes they are taught about themselves, they tend to act them out and thus perpetuate the stereotypes which reinforces the prejudice and keeps the cycle going.
  • Real or Alleged Identity or Characteristics - A preconceived or oversimplified generalization about an individual without regard for the whole and complex person. A person’s various identities are shaved down to “jock,” “sissy,” “geek,” “goth,” “slut,” “weirdo,” etc. These generalizations may be based on real aspects of the person or wholly made up by rumors and assumptions. These generalizations, when examined to the core, are often based on the person’s race, gender, class, ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation, ability, or age. The generalizations we make form the basis of our assumptions and stereotypes (prejudice). Assumptions, Stereotypes, and Labeling (Prejudice) - A conscious or unconscious negative belief about a whole group of people and its individual members. When the person holding the prejudice also has and uses the power (physical power – stronger and bigger, social power – friends, popularity, good reputation) to deny opportunities, resources or access (to friends, social occasions, self esteem) to a person because of their real or labeled group membership, there is mistreatment, rumors, and exclusion (discrimination). Mistreatment, Rumors, and Exclusion (Discrimination) - Prejudice plus the power. Discrimination can take many forms: isolating, hitting/tripping, verbally harassing/teasing, taking/hiding things, spreading rumors, sending hurtful emails, and more. Many acts of discrimination build up over time, perpetuated against one relatively less powerful social individual by a more powerful social individual or individuals, lead to condoned and widespread bullying and harassment ( oppression). Condoned and Widespread Bullying and Harassment (Oppression) - The systematic subjugation of a group of an individual by another group of people with access to social power. The bullying is widespread, performed by people who didn’t dislike the person in the first place. There is a silence from most everyone that seems to make this bullying okay. This condoned and widespread bullying benefits the non-bullied over the bullied and is maintained by social beliefs and practices. Because oppression is accepted by the peer community, the target individual often believes the messages and gives in to self blame and shame (internalized oppression). Self Blame and Shame ( Internalized Oppression) - The "buying into" the elements of oppression by the target individual. The bullied person starts to believe the stereotypes they are taught about him/herself, and he/she starts to accept the discrimination and oppression passively. Bullied people blame themselves for what is happening, feel ashamed of themselves, and even act out in the way their peers expect them to be and thus perpetuate the stereotypes which reinforces the prejudice and keeps the cycle going.
  • Policy - When schools don’t have an explicit policy, teachers have no legs to stand on in dealing with these matters. Kids know it’s happening, teachers know it’s happening, but there is no real response when parents or students say “it’s just what happens at this age,” or “what’s the big deal?” Programming - As Gary Howard always said, “You can’t teach what you don’t know.” Give teachers support in learning about alternative aggression, how to recognize it, and what to do about it. Teachers and staff also need to stop repeating the cycle of gender bias unwittingly and punishing girls more harshly for acts of aggression or acting out in general. Students need support, too. If girls don’t know how to deal with conflict, they will resort to what they know and what is safer. Practice - Adults jump on kids “don’t say” “don’t do” but don’t always follow through with meaningful follow-up. These same things then get driven underground to be used when adults aren’t around. They become the very weapons of bullying, which occurs in spaces where there is less adult supervision. Swift and clear consequences must follow acts of alternative aggression, and further explanation and training must reinforce the policy and programming. Adults also need to commit to being more visible in unsupervised spaces like bathrooms, hallways, lunch rooms, etc. to increase safety for all kids from all forms of bullying.
  • Transcript

    • 1. PNAIS Student Diversity Leadership Conference Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee Seattle Girls’ School What Are We Practicing For? Bullying, Bias, and Allyship Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 2. About Seattle Girls’ School Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 3. Agenda <ul><li>Bias and Bullying: Uncanny Similarities </li></ul><ul><li>Gender, Bias, and Bullying </li></ul><ul><li>Becoming the Adults We Want to Be </li></ul><ul><li>Moving from Bystander to Ally </li></ul><ul><li>Changing Your Schools </li></ul><ul><li>Resources </li></ul>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 4. Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 5. Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 6. Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 7. Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 8. <ul><li>Bias </li></ul><ul><li>15-20% unshakably biased, 15-20% unshakably convinced that discrimination is wrong. 60-70% could go either way. </li></ul><ul><li>It’s always been this way. </li></ul><ul><li>They didn’t mean anything by it. You’re being too sensitive. </li></ul><ul><li>Bullying </li></ul><ul><li>15% report that they bully regularly, 15% report that they are regularly targeted, 70% either never or occasionally bully or are targeted. </li></ul><ul><li>It’s just the way things are. It’s a common phase. </li></ul><ul><li>They didn’t mean anything by it. You’re being too sensitive. </li></ul>Bullying and Bias: What’s Said and Done What can I possibly do about it? Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 9. <ul><li>Bias </li></ul><ul><li>LGBTQ students experiencing harassment are more likely to have suicide ideation, experiment with drugs, participate in risky behaviors. </li></ul><ul><li>Stereotype vulnerable students are more likely to perform poorly in academic settings. </li></ul><ul><li>Students of color experience social loneliness, racial and social invisibility, class and cultural discomfort with White parents and administrators. </li></ul><ul><li>Although most schools have general diversity statements, few have initiatives or concerted and ongoing training of teachers and students. Lack of infrastructure. </li></ul><ul><li>Bullying </li></ul><ul><li>Children experiencing bullying are more likely to have suicide ideation, experiment with drugs, participate in risky behaviors. </li></ul><ul><li>Students experiencing bullying often experience a sharp drop of focus and grades in school. </li></ul><ul><li>Bullied students experience social loneliness, social invisibility, discomfort with parents and administrators who do not validate or understand their plight. </li></ul><ul><li>Although many schools have general anti-harassment statements, few have initiatives or concerted and ongoing trainings for teachers and students. Lack of infrastructure. </li></ul>Bullying and Bias: Statistics and Similarities Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 10. Gender, Bias, and Bullying Boys • Male Stereotypes & Homophobia • Physical Power • Worst Labels for Boys: Sissy, Fag, Wimp • Bullying = Physical & Athletic Size and Power • Bullied = Smaller, Weaker • Social Collective = Gangs, Athletic Teams • Physical Abuse and Overt Aggression • Outliers of Victims = Powerful Boys of Color, Empowered GBT Boys • Signs of Cry = Fantasy Lone Wolf, Extreme Sports Girls • Gender Bias & Homophobia • Social Power • Worst Labels for Girls: Mean, Ugly, Dyke • Bullying = Physical Beauty & Social Power • Bullied = Non-Mainstream Beauty, Few or No Friends • Social Collective = Cliques • Emotional Abuse and Relational Aggression • Outliers of Victims = Generalist Girls, Empowered Girls of Color • Signs of Cry = Isolated Damsel in Distress, Eating Disorders, Cutting Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 11. Exercise: Have You Heard? Put-Downs and Isms <ul><li>What are some of the put downs and insults you have heard at your schools to put or keep people on the outside? </li></ul><ul><li>How are these sayings connected to isms? </li></ul>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 12. Becoming the Adults We Want to Be <ul><li>Adolescent Brain Development </li></ul><ul><li>Peer Pressure </li></ul><ul><li>The Pressure of Being Middle </li></ul><ul><li>Backstage Spaces and </li></ul><ul><li>Frontstage Places </li></ul><ul><li>Path of Least Resistance </li></ul>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 13. Moving from Bystander to Ally <ul><li>Many bullying and anti-bias curriculum centers around agents and targets. Why not empower the 60-70% who are bystanders to become allies? </li></ul><ul><li>Empowered bystanders-to-allies keep the focus away from blaming the targets or agents. </li></ul><ul><li>Empowering bystanders-to-allies gives you a chance at creating a new path of least resistance. </li></ul><ul><li>Empowered bystanders-to-allies shift the balance of power </li></ul>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 14. How to Break the Cycle <ul><li>Learn about the isms </li></ul><ul><li>Understand how isms play out in bullying </li></ul><ul><li>Practice effective intervention skills </li></ul><ul><li>Develop your ally skills </li></ul><ul><li>Build coalitions and practice youth activism </li></ul>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 15. <ul><li>The Four Ps </li></ul><ul><li>• Policy - A comprehensive anti-bullying policy that includes alternative aggression and names identity groups. </li></ul><ul><li>• Programming - Training for teachers and staff on bullying and bias. Support for teachers and staff in acting to combat bullying and bias. Self-esteem and conflict management programs for students. </li></ul><ul><li>• Practice - Consistent and meaningful follow-through in dealing with acts of bullying and bias. Coverage of unsupervised spaces where bullying occurs most. </li></ul><ul><li>• PEOPLE - Critical mass of people who are supportive AND active on all levels. </li></ul><ul><li>EMPOWER THE BYSTANDERS TO BECOME ALLIES! </li></ul>Changing Your Schools Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 16. Leadership Lessons From the Dancing Guy: Keep on Dancing… Someone will join you… And soon, everyone will… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fW8amMCVAJQ Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 17. Resources <ul><li>Joshua M. Aronson, Ph.D., “Improving Achievement & Narrowing the Gap,” Learning and the Brain Conference, Cambridge, MA, November 2003 </li></ul><ul><li>Roy Baumeister, Case Western Reserve University, Various Social Psychology Experiments on the Effects of Social Exclusion </li></ul><ul><li>Beatbullying Toolkit for Teachers, http://www.beatbullying.org/images/teachers.pdf </li></ul><ul><li>“ Cycle of Bullying,” North Central Educational Service District, http://www.ncesd.org/safe_civil/docs/resources/cycle_of_bullying.pdf </li></ul><ul><li>Kevin Jennings, GLSEN (Gay Lesbian and Straight Education Network) www.glsen.org </li></ul><ul><li>Allan G. Johnson, Privilege, Power, and Difference. </li></ul><ul><li>Tara Kuther, “Understanding Bullying,” PTA.org, http://www.pta.org/pr_magazine_article_details_1117637268750.html </li></ul><ul><li>Michael Thompson & Kathy Schultz, “The Psychological Experiences of Students of Color,” Independent School Magazine, http://www.nais.org/publications/ismagazinearticle.cfm?Itemnumber=144307&sn.ItemNumber=145956&tn.ItemNumber=145958 </li></ul>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 18. Gender Specific Resources <ul><li>JoAnn Deak, Ph.D., Girls Will Be Girls: Raising Confident and Courageous Daughters </li></ul><ul><li>Pooja Makhijani, Under Her Skin: How Girls Experience Race in America . </li></ul><ul><li>John Medina, Talaris Research Institute, various studies on early gender differences in competition and play and “Love Lab.” </li></ul><ul><li>Mary Pipher, Ph.D., Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls </li></ul><ul><li>Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out; Odd Girl Speaks Out; Curse of the Good Girl </li></ul><ul><li>Harriet R. Tenenbaum, “Gender Achievement Motivation,” Learning and the Brain Conference, Cambridge, MA, November 2003. </li></ul><ul><li>Rosalind Wiseman, Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends & Other Realities of Adolescence; Queen Bee Moms and Kingpin Dads </li></ul><ul><li>Naomi Wolf, The Beauty Myth; Promiscuities . </li></ul>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)
    • 19. Presenter Information <ul><li>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee </li></ul><ul><li>6th Faculty and </li></ul><ul><li>Professional Outreach </li></ul><ul><li>Seattle Girls’ School </li></ul><ul><li>2706 S Jackson Street </li></ul><ul><li>Seattle WA 98144 </li></ul><ul><li>(206) 709-2228 x 219 </li></ul><ul><li>[email_address] </li></ul><ul><li>http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/ </li></ul>Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee Rosetta Eun Ryong Lee (http://sites.google.com/site/sgsprofessionaloutreach/)

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