One morning, a woman was sad when she faced the mirror. She discovered she only had 3 strands of hair on her head. Suddenly, she smiled. “Today,” she said, “I’ll braid my hair!” And after doing so, she walked out of her home and had fun, fun, fun.
The next morning, the woman woke up and felt sad as she saw the mirror. She discovered she only had 2 strands of hair. Suddenly, she smiled. “Today,” she said, “I’ll part my hair in the middle.” After she did that, she walked out of her home and had fun, fun, fun.
The next morning, the woman woke up and felt sad as she saw the mirror. She discovered she only had 1 strand of hair left. Suddenly, she smiled. “Today,” she said, “I’ll wear my hair in a ponytail.” After she did that, she walked out of her home and had fun, fun, fun.
The next morning, the woman woke up and felt sad as she saw the mirror. She discovered she had zero hair left. Suddenly, she smiled. “Yeepee!” she shouted in glee, “I don’t have to do my hair today!” Immediately, she walked out of her home and had fun, fun, fun.
A thick wad of P1000 bills gives pleasure. A fun movie, gives pleasure. A roller coaster ride gives pleasure. A kiss gives pleasure A chocolate parfait with thick syrup gives pleasure.
Then what’s the difference between pleasure and happiness?
Pleasure is an outside job. But happiness is an inside job . It doesn’t depend on any external circumstances. Yep, even if you only have three strands of hair on your head. Happiness isn’t the absence of problems. Happiness
The Bible doesn’t say, “Be joyful sometimes.” Or “Be joyful when you don’t have problems.” The Bible says, “BE JOYFUL ALWAYS.” Is that possible? I mean, c’mon. No one can be happy 365 days a year. But the Bible says, “Be joyful always” because happiness isn’t a mood. Happiness isn’t an emotion either. Happiness is a way of life. “ Be Joyful Always”
What is common? I know of strange human beings walking this face of the earth who are extremely happy. Not just moderately or mildly happy. But deeply joyful. (Hey, you may be one of them. Congratulations!) I know them. Some of them are my friends. Because of my work, I’ve traveled all over the world. So I asked myself this question: Who are the happiest people I know? I listed them down. After sifting through the hundreds of thousands of people archived in my brain, I asked a more difficult question: What is common among them all?
I came up with seven great things I see in extremely happy people. I call them the 7 Tools of Happiness:
Let me share with you why many people are unhappy… The enemy of happiness isn’t sadness. The enemy of happiness isn’t problems. The enemy of happiness isn’t loneliness. The enemy of happiness is FEAR Our lives are so fueled by it. We run our lives by fear !!! Why people unhappy?
Your Body Is Hardwired To Be Afraid In Dan Baker’s excellent book, What Happy People Know, he explains how our body circuitry is wired to fear. Our brains have three parts. The brain stem, the amygdala, and the neocortex. The more primitive parts of our brains, the brain steam (also called the reptilian brain, because reptiles have these for brains) and the amygdala are “programmed for fear” . FEAR
Why? Our ancestors needed fear for their physical survival . Imagine yourself living in the wilderness with lions, wolves, and cobras around you. Danger lurks behind every tree and shadow. Once their brains register fear, the endocrine glands produce our fear hormones adrenaline and cortisol. It gave them super strength to fight or flight. And in fighting or fleeing, they exhaust the adrenaline and cortisol in their bodies. Our Ancestors Needed Fear
Well and good. But what about us who usually sit behind desks and work on computers? We still have the same fear mechanism. But this time, we’re no longer afraid of lions or cobras behind every tree. We afraid of our rising credit card bills. We’re afraid of our boss. We’re afraid of losing our jobs. We’re afraid for our children future? We’re afraid that at 35, we won’t get married. We’re afraid we’ll grow lonely. We’re afraid we’ll run out of money. We’re afraid of social rejection. We’re afraid of social shame and losing face. We’re afraid of disease. What about now?
And these fears are so real, our endocrine glands produce adrenaline and cortisol as well. And because we’re seated behind our desks, pounding on our computers, we really don’t use up any of it. Adrenaline and cortisol become POISON in our bodies, destroying our health bit by bit. Poison in life Poison
Thus, very few people are happy. If you want to be happy, we need to overcome our fears. How? Conclusion
Twenty years ago, a friend gave me a book about facing fears. My arrogant response to her: “Thanks for the book. But frankly, I don’t think I need it. I don’t know why, but fear isn’t a problem for me. I don’t have any fears.” Ten years later, I ate my words. Because after a deep soul search, I realized how my life was run by many fears. Many of the things I was doing I did because of fear! I feared what other people said about me. I feared failure. I feared angry people. I feared of not having enough. I feared of not being enough. What is our fear?
The Only Antidote to Fear Is… In my life, I’ve discovered that there is only one thing that can overcome fear. There is only one thing that is more powerful than fear. The only antidote to fear is LOVE . When you fill your life with love, your fears naturally disappears. I’m talking about a love for God, a love for others, a love for yourself, and a love for life itself. The Bible says, Perfect love casts out all fear and I totally believe it.
In fact, remember the “7 Tools of Happiness” I listed above? Every single one of them is really a facet of love Each tool can drive away a specific fear in your life. Once your fears are gone, happiness will flood your soul. Facet of love
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