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ASI Preposterous Statement 2011
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ASI Preposterous Statement 2011



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  • 2. “Can you take Aural Gratification?”Danni When waiting for Keith to wrap up another phone call In Reference To: Aural Gratification, Inc.
  • 3. “Do you really think that would be a good use of my time?”Chad Katie: “Chad, can you run to the store and get me a Cherry Coke?”
  • 4. “When I was leaving, my tire bumped into your blinker.”Chad When telling Carol that he drove over the hood of her car
  • 5. “Well this is what I was always looking for the last time I was working here.”Jim Grim Jon: “So, Grim, what do you think of things around here in regards to the new corporate structure?”
  • 6. “I wore out the lifter on my headset from taking so many sales calls.”Chad When JR asked Chad why his headset was not working
  • 7. “I bet it’s for Chad, so he can print his quotes faster.”JR When trying to figure out who the new printer was for
  • 8. Destiny: “Jeez, you scared the crap out of me. My fingers are even tinging.”Keith: “I haven’t had a woman say that to me in years...” Keith Destiny was walking down the hall and Keith came out of his office and scared her
  • 9. “No, Keith, I can not do this with you today ... I am still sore.”Chad Talking with Keith
  • 10. Chad: “I hate working in the sample room!”Keith: “You show up every day for the next 2 weeks and work at least 32 hours per week, and you will never have to work in the sample room again.”Chad: “What would you like done in the sample room?” Chad & Keith Sales Meeting – Agenda Item: Sample Room
  • 11. “Hello, Jon, Dwayne over at Majam Building Supply in ahhh...Newburgh. I need...I need ya ta cawl me back, we have ahhh...we have a serious fuckin’ problem. You guys seem to have ahhh...sent da quote directly to da customer. And...I...I...I’d like ta know if ya bumped your fuckin’ head, or whatchya did, and why ya did it, but...ya’s a problem at this point. And ahhh...I need ya ta cawl me at my office. 555-5555 ext. 555 Thank you. Bye.” Customer – Dwayne Jaycox One of our friendly Marjam Distributors