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  • 1. ‫ﻃﻘﻮس اﻻﺣﺘﻀﺎر‬ ‫رواﻳﻪ‬ ‫ﺧﺎﻟﺪ اﻟﺴﺮوﺟﻲ‬
  • 2. ‫ﻃﺒﻘﺎ ﻟﻘﻮﺍﻧﲔ ﺍﳌﻠﻜﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﻔﻜﺮﻳﺔ‬ ‫א‬ ‫א‬ ‫א‬ ‫.‬ ‫אא‬ ‫א‬ ‫)ﻋـﱪ ﺍﻻﻧﱰﻧـﺖ ﺃﻭ‬ ‫א‬ ‫אא‬ ‫ﻟﻠﻤﻜﺘﺒــﺎﺕ ﺍﻻﻟﻜﱰﻭﻧﻴــﺔ ﺃﻭ ﺍﻷﻗــﺮﺍﺹ ﺍﳌﺪﳎــﺔ ﺃﻭ ﺍﻯ‬ ‫א‬ ‫ﻭﺳﻴﻠﺔ ﺃﺧﺮﻯ (‬ ‫א‬ ‫א‬ ‫.‬ ‫.‬ ‫א א‬
  • 3. ‫-1-‬ ‫:ﺴﺄﺤﻜﻰ ﻟﻙ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ.. ﺴﺄﺤﻜﻰ ﻟـﻙ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﺘﻔﺼﻴل.. ﺃﺤﺘﺎﺝ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻓﻀﻰ ﺇﻟﻴﻙ.. ﻟﻘﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﺘﺼﻠﺕ ﺒﻰ ﺃﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﺍﻷﺯﻤﺔ.. ﺍﺘﺼﻠﺕ ﺃﻜﺜﺭ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﺭﺓ ﻭﻟﺩﻴﻙ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻷﻗل ﻓﻜﺭﺓ ﻋﻤﺎ ﺤﺩﺙ.. ﻟﺸﺩ‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺤﺘﺎﺝ ﺇﻟﻴﻙ.. ﻫل ﺘﺘﺫﻜﺭ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﺃﺤﺩﻨﺎ ﻴﻤﺭ ﺒﺄﺯﻤﺔ ﻓﻴﻭﺠﻊ ﺭﺃﺱ ﺍﻵﺨﺭ ﺒﺎﻟﺤﺩﻴﺙ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻁﻭﻴل.. ﺃﻓﻀﻰ ﺇﻟﻴـﻙ ﻓﺄﺸـﻌﺭ ﺒﺎﻻﺭﺘﻴـﺎﺡ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﻨﺘﺒﺎﺩل ﺍﻷﺩﻭﺍﺭ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﻜﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﺘﺘﻌﺏ ﺃﻨﺕ..‬ ‫ﻤﻬﻤﻭﻤﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﺍﻷﺯﻤﺔ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﺒـﺔ ﻗـﺩ ﺍﻨﺘﺯﻋﺘـﻙ‬ ‫ﻤﻨﻰ.. ﺍﻨﺘﺯﻋﺕ ﻤﻨﻰ ﻤﺘﻨﻔﺱ ﺍﻷﺤﺯﺍﻥ..‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺃﻴﻥ ﺃﺒﺩﺃ ﻤﻌﻙ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ؟. . . . . !‬ ‫ﺴﺄﺒﺩﺃ ﻤﻌﻙ ﻤﻥ ﺤﻴﺙ ﺘﻭﻗﻑ ﺍﻟﺤﺩﻴﺙ ﺒﻨﺎ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺁﺨﺭ ﺇﺠﺎﺯﺓ ﻟﻙ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﺤﻜﻰ ﻟﻙ ﻋﻤﺎ ﺤﺩﺙ ﻤـﻥ ﺒﻌـﺩ ﺴـﻔﺭﻙ‬ ‫ﺍﻹﺠﺎﺯﺓ ﺍﻟﻤﺎﻀﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺴﺄﻁﻴل ﻋﻠﻴﻙ؟..‬
  • 4. ‫ﺤﺘﻰ ﻟـﻭ ﺃﻁﻠـﺕ ﻋﻠﻴـﻙ.. ﺃﻋﻠـﻡ ﺃﻨـﻙ‬ ‫ﺴﺘﺘﺤﻤﻠﻨﻰ..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﺍﻋﺫﺭﻨﻰ ﻓﻠﻥ ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﺤﺩﻴﺜﻰ ﻤﺭﺘﺒﺎ ﻭﻻ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻤﺴﻠﺴﻼ.. ﺴﺄﺤﺩﺜﻙ ﺒﺸـﻜل ﻋﺸـﻭﺍﺌﻰ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻗﻭل ﻤﺎ ﻴﺘﻭﺍﺭﺩ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺫﻫﻨـﻰ ﺃﻭ ﹰ ﺒـﺄﻭل‬ ‫ﻻ‬ ‫ﺩﻭﻥ ﺘﻌﻤﺩ ﺍﻟﺘﺭﺘﻴﺏ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺃﺒﺩﺃ؟..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﺒﺩﺃ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ . . . . . .‬
  • 5. ‫–2-‬ ‫:ﺒﻌﺩﻤﺎ ﺴﺎﻓﺭﺕ ﺃﻨﺕ ﺒﺤﻭﺍﻟﻰ ﺸـﻬﺭ..‬ ‫ﻋﺎﺩ ﺍﻟﻭﺭﻡ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﻴﺙ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻟﻠﻤﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻨﻴﺔ ﻭﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﻨﻔﺱ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﻀﻊ ﺍﻟﻘﺩﻴﻡ.. ﻭﻗﺭﺭ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺇﺠـﺭﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﻋﻤﻠﻴﺔ ﺠﺭﺍﺤﻴﺔ ﻻﺴﺘﺌﺼﺎل ﺍﻟﻭﺭﻡ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﻴـﺙ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺨﻁﺔ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺘﺴﺘﻠﺯﻡ ﺍﺴﺘﻜﻤﺎﻟﻪ ﺒﺠﻠﺴـﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﺸﻌﺔ ﺍﻟﻜﻭﺒﺎﻟﺕ..‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻷﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﻋﻠﻤﺕ ﺸﻘﻴﻘﺘﻰ "ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ‬ ‫.."ﺍﺘﺼﻠﺕ ﻤﻥ ﻟﻨﺩﻥ.. ﺒﻜﺕ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺤﺩﺙ ﺃﺒﻰ‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺴﺘﺤﻀﺭ ﻟﺘﻜﻭﻥ ﺇﻟﻰ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺘﻠﻴﻔﻭﻥ..‬ ‫ﺠﺎﻨﺏ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺃﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﻌﻤﻠﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﺠﺭﺍﺤﻴﺔ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ‬ ‫ﻁﻤﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﻌﻤﻠﻴﺔ ﺴﺘﻜﻭﻥ ﺴـﻬﻠﺔ ﻭﻏﻴـﺭ‬ ‫ﻭﻭﻋﺩﻫﺎ ﺒﺄﻥ ﻴﺤﻀﺭ ﻫـﻭ ﻭﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﺨﻁﻴﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﻟﺯﻴﺎﺭﺘﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﻟﻨﺩﻥ ﺒﻌـﺩ ﺍﻟﺠﺭﺍﺤـﺔ ﻭﺠﻠﺴـﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺸﻌﺔ.. ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻭﻋﺩ ﻫﺩﺃ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻨﻔﻌﺎل "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "‬ ‫ﺃﻨـﺕ ﻻ‬ ‫ﻭﺤﺴﻥ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺍﻟﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﺴﻴﺔ ﻷﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺸﻙ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻤﺩﻯ ﺍﺭﺘﺒﺎﻁ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒـ "ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ .."‬ ‫ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﺨﺘﻴﻥ ﻜﺎﻨﺘﺎ ﻗﺒل ﺃﻥ ﺘﻜﻭﻨﺎ ﺃﻤﺎ ﻭﺍﺒﻨﺔ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 6. ‫ﻜﺘﻭﻤﺔ ﻭﻻ ﺘﺤﻜﻰ ﻷﺤـﺩ.. ﻻ ﺘﺤﻜـﻰ ﺤﺘـﻰ‬ ‫ﻷﻤﻬﺎ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﺤﻜﻰ ﻟﺴﻤﺎﺀ . . . .‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻬﻡ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻙ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻭﻋﺩ ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ‬ ‫ﺒﺯﻴﺎﺭﺓ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﻭﻗﺩ ﺤﺩﺙ ﺫﻟﻙ.. ﺒﻌﺩ ﺍﻨﺘﻬـﺎﺀ‬ ‫ﺠﻠﺴﺎﺕ ﺃﺸﻌﺔ ﺍﻟﻜﻭﺒﺎﻟﺕ ﺴﺎﻓﺭﺍ.. ﻗﻀﺕ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﻊ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻭﺍﻷﻭﻻﺩ ﺜﻼﺜﺔ ﺃﺸﻬﺭ.. ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﻌﻭﻴﻀﺎ ﻋﻥ ﺜﻼﺙ ﺴﻨﻭﺍﺕ ﻟﻡ ﺘﺘﻘﺎﺒﻼ ﻓﻴﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺭﺴﺎﺌل ﺃﻤﻰ ﻟﻰ ﻭﻟﺸﻘﻴﻘﺘﻰ ﺼﻔﺎﺀ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﺸﻰ ﺒﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﻘﻀﻰ ﺃﻴﺎﻤﺎ ﺴﻌﻴﺩﺓ ﻓﻰ ﻟﻨﺩﻥ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻨﺘﻬﺯ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻓﺭﺼﺔ ﺍﻟﻭﺠـﻭﺩ ﻓـﻰ ﻟﻨـﺩﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﻋﺭﺽ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺇﻨﺠﻠﻴﺯﻯ ﻤﺘﺨﺼﺹ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻋﻼﺝ ﺍﻷﻭﺭﺍﻡ.. ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺍﻹﻨﺠﻠﻴﺯﻯ ﺃﻜـﺩ‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺘﻠﻘﺘﻪ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓـﻰ ﻤﺼـﺭ ﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﺠﻴﺩﺍ.. ﻭﺃﻥ ﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺃﺼﺒﺤﺕ ﺍﻵﻥ ﻤﻁﻤﺌﻨﺔ .‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫...‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻴﺏ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻓﻰ ﻁﺭﻴﻕ ﺍﻟﻌﻭﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﻟﻨﺩﻥ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﻋﺒﻭﺭﺍ ﺒﻤﺎﻟﻁﺔ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺘﻭﻗﻔﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻴﻬﺎ ﻴﻭﻤﺎ ﻭﺍﺤـﺩﺍ.. ﻋـﺎﻭﺩ ﺍﻟـﻭﺭﻡ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﻴـﺙ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻅﻬﻭﺭ ﺒﺴﺭﻋﺔ ﻏﻴﺭ ﻤﺘﻭﻗﻌﺔ . . . .‬
  • 7. ‫ﻻ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻴﺎ ﺃﺨﻰ ﺤﺠﻡ ﺍﻟﻤـﺄﺯﻕ ﺍﻟـﺫﻯ‬ ‫ﻭﻗﻌﻨﺎ ﻓﻴﻪ ﺒﻌﺩ ﻋﻭﺩﺓ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻤﺼﺭ..‬ ‫ﻟﻘﺩ ﻋﺎﺩ ﺍﻟﻭﺭﻡ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﻴﺙ ﻟﻠﻤﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻟﺜﺔ ﻭﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺫﺍﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﻀﻊ.. ﻜﺎﻥ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺴـﺘﺤﻴل ﺇﺠـﺭﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﺠﺭﺍﺤﺔ ﺜﺎﻟﺜﺔ.. ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺃﻜﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻷﻨﺴـﺠﺔ ﻟـﻥ‬ ‫ﺘﻠﺘﺌﻡ ﻓﻰ ﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺍﻟﺠﺭﺍﺤﺔ.. ﺍﻟﺠﺭﺍﺤﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﺴـﺎﺒﻘﺔ‬ ‫ﺠﻌﻠﺕ ﺍﻷﻨﺴﺠﺔ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻨﻁﻘـﺔ ﺍﻟـﻭﺭﻡ ﺘﺘﻬﺘـﻙ‬ ‫ﻭﻴﺴﺘﺤﻴل ﺍﻟﺘﺌﺎﻡ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻷﻨﺴﺠﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﻋﻤل ﺃﻯ‬ ‫ﺠﺭﺍﺤﺔ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ..‬ ‫ﺤﺘﻰ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺒﺄﺸﻌﺔ ﺍﻟﻜﻭﺒﺎﻟﺕ ﻟـﻡ ﻴﻜـﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﻤﻜﻨﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻘﺩ ﺘﻠﻘﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻼﺠﺎ ﺇﺸﻌﺎﻋﻴﺎ ﻤﻜﺜﻔﺎ ﻗﺒل‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺴﻔﺭﻫﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻟﻨﺩﻥ.. ﻭﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﺠﺴـﺩﻫﺎ ﻴﺤﺘﻤـل‬ ‫ﺠﺭﻋﺔ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻷﺸﻌﺔ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻷﺒﻰ:‬ ‫ﻻ ﻴﻭﺠﺩ ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻨﺎ ﺴﻭﻯ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ‬
  • 8. ‫-3-‬ ‫:ﻜﺎﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺍﻟﺒﺩﺍﻴﺔ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻋﻠـﻡ ﺒـﺄﺩﻕ‬ ‫ﺘﻔﺎﺼﻴل ﻤﺭﺽ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻭﺘﻁﻭﺭﺍﺘﻪ ﻭﻜﺎﻓﺔ ﺍﻟﺘﻭﻗﻌﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻻﺤﺘﻤﺎﻻﺕ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﻟﻠﻤﺭﺽ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ ﺃﺨﻔـﻰ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻜﺜﻴﺭ ﻤﻤﺎ ﻴﻌﻠﻤﻪ.. ﺘﺤﻤل ﻭﺤـﺩﻩ ﻋـﺏﺀ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﺎ ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻨﺎ ﻓﻜﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﻌﺭﻓﺔ ﺍﻟﺤﻘﻴﻘﺔ ﺒﻜل ﺃﺒﻌﺎﺩﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﻴﻀﻊ ﻗﻨﺎﻋﺎ ﻴﺨﻔﻰ ﺒﻪ ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭﻩ ﻭﻤﺨﺎﻭﻓـﻪ.. ﻻ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺸﻙ ﺃﻨﻪ ﺃﺩﺭﻙ ﺃﻥ ﺇﻁـﻼﻕ ﺍﻟﻌﻨـﺎﻥ ﻟﻠﻤﺸـﺎﻋﺭ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﻤﺨﺎﻭﻑ ﻻﺒﺩ ﺴﻴﻌﺭﻀﻨﺎ ﻟﻼﻨﻬﻴـﺎﺭ.. ﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﺤﺭﺹ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﻥ ﻴﺠﻌﻠﻨﺎ ﻨﺘﻤﺎﺴﻙ.. ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﻌﻁﻴﻨﻰ ﺍﻹﻴﺤﺎﺀ ﺒﺄﺸﻴﺎﺀ ﺤﻭل ﻤﺭﺽ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﻻ‬ ‫ﻴﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺍﻹﻴﺤﺎﺀ ﺒﻬﺎ ﻟﻠﺒﻨﺎﺕ ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻔﻌـل‬ ‫ﺫﻟﻙ ﻤﻌﻰ ﺒﺤﺴﺎﺏ ﺩﻗﻴﻕ.. ﻜﺎﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻴﺒﺩﻭ ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻗﻭﻴﺎ ﻭﻻ ﺃﺨﻔﻰ ﻋﻠﻴﻙ ﺃﻥ ﺫﻟﻙ ﺠﻌﻠﻨﺎ ﻨﺘﻤﺎﺴـﻙ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﻁﺒﻴﻌﺘﻪ ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭﻩ ﻫﺎﺩﺌـﺔ‬ ‫ﺒﺸﻜل ﺃﻓﻀل..‬ ‫ﻭﻻ ﺘﻌﺒﺭ ﻋﻥ ﻨﻔﺴﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺼﺨﺏ ﻭﺃﻤﻰ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﻟﻬﺎ ﻨﻔﺱ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﻌﺔ . . . .‬
  • 9. ‫ﺍﻟﻌﻼﻗﺔ ﺒﻴﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻭﺃﻤـﻰ ﺘﺤﻜﻤﻬـﺎ ﻫـﺫﻩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭ ﺍﻟﻬﺎﺩﺌﺔ.. ﺃﺜﻕ ﺘﻤﺎﻤﺎ ﺃﻥ ﻜﻼ ﻤﻨﻬﻡ ﻜﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻴﺤﺏ ﺍﻵﺨﺭ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺠﻴل ﺘﻌﻭﺩ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻜﺘﻡ‬ ‫ﻴﺒﺩﻭ‬ ‫ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭﻩ ﻭﻋﺩﻡ ﺍﻟﺘﻌﺒﻴﺭ ﻋﻨﻬﺎ ﺒﺼﺭﺍﺤﺔ..‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺠﻴل ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻌﺘﺒﺭ ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭ ﺍﻟﺤﺏ ﻋﻭﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻻ ﻴﻨﺒﻐﻰ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻅﻬﺭ ﺃﻤﺎﻡ ﺍﻷﺒﻨﺎﺀ.. ﻟـﻡ ﻴﺤـﺩﺙ‬ ‫ﻴﻭﻤﺎ ﺃﻥ ﻗﺎل ﺃﺤﺩﻫﻤﺎ ﻟﻶﺨﺭ ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻨﺎ ﻜﻠﻤﺔ ﺤـﺏ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺼﺭﻴﺤﺔ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻨﻰ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺭﻯ ﺃﺸـﻴﺎﺀ ﻜﺜﻴـﺭﺓ‬ ‫‪‬‬ ‫ﺘﻌﻁﻰ ﻤﺅﺸﺭﺍﺕ ﺒﻭﺠﻭﺩ ﻤﺸـﺎﻋﺭ ﻋﻤﻴﻘـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭ ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﻋﻤﻕ ﺒﻜﺜﻴﺭ ﻤـﻥ ﺍﻟﺤـﺏ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺭﻭﻤﺎﻨﺴﻰ.. ﺤﺏ ﻟﻪ ﻁﺒﻴﻌﺔ ﺨﺎﺼﺔ ﺘﺘﺠﻠﻰ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺩﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﺭﺤﻤﺔ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺘﻨﻅﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﺸـﻲﺀ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻘﺩﻴﺱ.. ﺘﻔﻌل ﺍﻷﺸﻴﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻴﺤﺒﻬﺎ ﻭﺘﺘﺠﻨـﺏ‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﻴﻜﺭﻫﻪ ﺒﺸﻜل ﺼﺎﺭﻡ.. ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﻨﺎ ﻨﻐﻀـﺏ‬ ‫ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﺘﺼﺭﻑ ﺃﻭ ﻓﻌل ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﻫـﻰ ﺍﻷﺨـﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﺘﻐﻀﺏ ﻤﻨﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺃﺠﻠﻪ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻘﻭل ﻟﻨﺎ:‬
  • 10. ‫ﻭﺍﻟﺩﻜﻡ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺃﻋﻅﻡ ﺭﺠل ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺩﻨﻴﺎ .‬ ‫ﻭﺘﺨﺎﺼﻤﻨﺎ ﺤﺘﻰ ﻨﺴﺘﺭﻀﻴﻪ . . . .‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﺯﻭﺍﺝ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻭﺃﺒﻰ ﻋﻥ ﺤﺏ ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ‬ ‫ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﺃﺤﺏ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻓﺘﺎﺓ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻋﻥ ﺍﺨﺘﻴﺎﺭ..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ ﺍﺨﺘﺎﺭ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻟﻠﺯﻭﺍﺝ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺍﺒﻨﺔ ﺨﺎﻟﺘـﻪ‬ ‫ﻭﺨﺒﺭ ﺃﺨﻼﻗﻬﺎ ﻭﺘﺭﺒﻴﺘﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﻟﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻴﻭﻤﺎ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﺯﻭﺠﺕ ﺃﻤﻙ ﻟﻡ ﺘﻜﻥ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻅـﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﺃﺠﻤل ﻓﺘﺎﺓ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﺒﻌﺩ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻤﻌﺎﺸﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻁﻭﻴﻠﺔ‬ ‫ﺃﺼﺒﺤﺕ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻅﺭﻯ ﺃﻋﻅﻡ ﺍﻤﺭﺃﺓ .‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻓﺎﺭﻕ ﺍﻟﺘﻌﻠﻴﻡ ﻭﺍﻟﺜﻘﺎﻓﺔ ﻜﺒﻴﺭﺍ ﺒﻴﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﺒﻤﺭﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﺴﻨﻴﻥ ﺍﺴﺘﻁﺎﻋﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﺘﻌﻭﻴﺽ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻔﺎﺭﻕ ﺒﺤﻜﻤﺘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻔﻁﺭﻴﺔ ﻭﺨﺒـﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻴﺎﻡ..‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺭ ﻟﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻴﻭﻤﺎ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻔﺘﺭﺓ ﺍﻷﺨﻴﺭﺓ ﻟﻡ ﺃﻜﻥ ﺃﻗﻁﻊ ﺒـﺭﺃﻯ‬ ‫ﺩﻭﻥ ﺍﺴﺘﺸﺎﺭﺓ ﺃﻤﻙ‬
  • 11. ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻠﻙ ﺸﻬﺎﺩﺓ ﻤﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﺫﻭﺒﺎﻥ ﻓﺎﺭﻕ‬ ‫ﻟﻘﺩ ﺍﻜﺘﺴـﺒﺕ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻌﻠﻴﻡ ﻭﺍﻟﺜﻘﺎﻓﺔ ﺒﻴﻨﻬﻤﺎ..‬ ‫ﺒﻤﺭﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﺴﻨﻴﻥ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﺭﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﺤﻜﻤﺔ ﻭﺼﻭﺍﺏ ﺍﻟﺤﻜﻡ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻷﻤﻭﺭ ﻟﻴﻘﺘﺭﺏ ﻤﺴﺘﻭﻯ ﺘﻔﻜﻴﺭﻫـﺎ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﺴﺘﻭﻯ ﺘﻔﻜﻴﺭ ﺃﺒﻰ.. ﺘﺤﻭﻟﺕ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﻗﺔ ﺒﻴﻨﻬﻤﺎ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻬﺎﻴﺔ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻨﻭﻉ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺼﺩﺍﻗﺔ ﻭﺍﻷﺨﻭﺓ..‬ ‫ﺒﻌﺩ ﺍﻟﻌﻭﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻟﺜﺔ ﻟﻠﺴـﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺒﺤـﻭﺍﻟﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﻗﺭﺭ ﺃﺒـﻰ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺸﻬﺭ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻋﻴﺩ ﻤﻴﻼﺩ ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﻨﺤﺘﻔل ﺒﻌﻴﺩ ﻤﻴﻼﺩ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﻟﻡ ﺘﻜﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻤﻌﺘـﺎﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻻﺤﺘﻔﺎل.. ﻭﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻫـﺫﻩ ﻫـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺓ ﺍﻷﻭﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻴﺤﺩﺙ ﻓﻴﻬﺎ ﻫـﺫﺍ ﺍﻻﺤﺘﻔـﺎل‬ ‫ﻗﺭﺭ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺫﻟﻙ ﺒﺎﻻﺘﻔﺎﻕ ﻤﻌﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﺒﻌﻴﺩ ﻤﻴﻼﺩﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﻟﺭﻓﻊ ﻤﻌﻨﻭﻴﺎﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﻭﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺨﺠﻠﺔ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺫﻟﻙ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﺎﺴﺘﻨﻜﺎﺭ ﻤﺼﻁﻨﻊ:‬ ‫ﻭﻫل ﺃﻨﺎ ﺼﻐﻴﺭﺓ ﺤﺘﻰ ﻴﻘـﺎﻡ ﻟـﻰ ﻋﻴـﺩ‬ ‫ﻤﻴﻼﺩ؟!!‬
  • 12. ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺨﺠﻠﺔ ﻟﻠﻐﺎﻴﺔ ﺒﺴﺒﺏ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻻﺤﺘﻔﺎل..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺴﻌﻴﺩﺓ . . . .‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 13. ‫-4-‬ ‫:ﻋﻼﻗﺘﻰ ﺒﺄﻤﻰ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻋﻼﻗﺔ ﺨﺎﺼﺔ..‬ ‫ﺨﺼﻭﺼﻴﺘﻬﺎ ﺘﺨﺘﻠﻑ ﻋﻥ ﺨﺼﻭﺼـﻴﺔ ﻋﻼﻗـﺔ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒـ"ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺃﻭ "ﺼﻔﺎﺀ .."ﻜﻨﺕ ﻭﻟﺩﺍ ﻭﺤﻴﺩﺍ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺒﻨﺘﻴﻥ.. ﺍﻟﻭﻟﺩ ﺍﻟﻭﺤﻴﺩ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺒﻨﺎﺕ ﻴﺴﻤﻰ "‬ ‫.."ﻜﻨﺕ ﺩﻴﻙ ﺍﻟﺒﺭﺍﺒـﺭ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴـﺒﺔ‬ ‫ﺩﻴﻙ ﺍﻟﺒﺭﺍﺒﺭ‬ ‫ﻷﻤﻰ.. ﻻ ﺘﻀﺤﻙ.. ﻫﻜﺫﺍ ﻴﺴﻤﻭﻨﻪ.. " ﺩﻴـﻙ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺒﺭﺍﺒﺭ .."ﻻ ﺃﻋـﺭﻑ ﺒـﺎﻟﻁﺒﻊ ﺃﺼـل ﻫـﺫﻩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺴﻤﻴﺔ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻨﻰ ﺃﻋﺘﻘﺩ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﺴـﻤﻴﺔ ﺘﺨـﺹ‬ ‫ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻷﻥ ﺍﻟﺩﻴﻙ ﺍﻟﻭﺤﻴـﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﻻﻤﺘﻴﺎﺯ ﺒﺎﻟﺫﻜﻭﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﻭﺴﻁ ﻤﺠﻤﻭﻋﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺩﺠﺎﺝ ﻴﺼﺒﺢ ﻤﻤﻴـﺯﺍ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺘﻤﻴﻴﺯ ﺍﻟﺫﻜﻭﺭﻯ ﻫﻭ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻁﺒﻊ‬ ‫ﻋﻼﻗﺘﻰ ﺒﺄﻤﻰ ﺒﻁﺎﺒﻌﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺨﺎﺹ.. ﺒﺎﻟﻘﻁﻊ ﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﺒﻴﻨﻰ ﻭﺒﻴﻨﻬﺎ ﺤﺏ ﻭﺤﻨﺎﻥ ﻤﺘﺒﺎﺩل.. ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﺍﻟﺤﺏ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﺤﻨﺎﻥ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭ ﺍﻟﺸﺎﺌﻌﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺃﺴـﺭﺘﻨﺎ ﻭﻻ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﻜﻭﻨﻰ ﻭﻟﺩﺍ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻴﺘﻤﻴﺯ ﺒﻬﺎ ﺃﺤﺩ ﻋﻥ ﺍﻵﺨﺭ..‬ ‫ﻟﻘـﺩ‬ ‫ﻫﻭ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺃﻋﻁﻰ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﻗﺔ ﺨﺼﻭﺼﻴﺘﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻋﻭﻤﻠﺕ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻷﺴﺎﺱ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺍﻟﺼﻐﺭ..‬
  • 14. ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﺨﺘﻰ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺍﻷﻜﺒـﺭ‬ ‫ﺴﻨﺎ ﻤﻨﻰ ﺘﺨﻁﺊ ﻤﻌﻰ ﺃﻭ ﺘﺭﺩ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺒﺸﻜل ﻏﻴﺭ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻻﺌﻕ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺘﻨﻬﺭﻫﺎ ﻗﺎﺌﻠﺔ:‬ ‫ﻋﻴﺏ.. ﺇﻨﻪ ﺃﺨﻭﻙ‬ ‫ِ‬ ‫ﻜﻭﻨﻰ ﻭﻟﺩﺍ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻌﻁﻴﻨﻰ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻅﺭ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻤﻴﺯﺓ ﺍﻟﺘﻔﻭﻕ ﺭﻏﻡ ﻓﺎﺭﻕ ﺍﻟﺴﻥ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻫﻭ ﻟﺼﺎﻟﺢ‬ ‫"ﺴﻤﺎﺀ .."ﺘﺭﺒﻰ ﺠﻴل ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺃﻥ ﻟﻠﺭﺠـل‬ ‫ﻭﻻﺒﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻜـﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﻬﻤﺎ ﺼﻐﺭ ﺴﻨﻪ ﺍﺤﺘﺭﺍﻤﻪ..‬ ‫ﺍﻋﺘﺎﺩﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﻤﻴﺯﺍ ﺤﺘﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺃﺒﺴﻁ ﺍﻷﺸﻴﺎﺀ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﺘﻀﻊ ﻷﺒﻰ ﻗﻁﻌﺔ ﻟﺤﻡ ﺯﺍﺌﺩﺓ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﻤﺎﺌـﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻐﺫﺍﺀ.. ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻌﺔ ﺍﻟﺯﺍﺌﺩﺓ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺭﻤﺯ ﺇﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﻴﺎﺩﺓ.. ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻴﺄﻜﻠﻬﺎ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻅﻠﺕ ﺘﻭﻀﻊ ﻟﻪ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺎﺌﺩﺓ ﻜﺭﻤﺯ ﻟﻼﻤﺘﻴﺎﺯ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﺒﺭﺕ ﺩﺸﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺭﺠﻭﻟﺘﻰ ﺒﻘﻁﻌﺔ ﺍﻟﻠﺤﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺯﺍﺌﺩﺓ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻤﺎﺌﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﻐﺫﺍﺀ.. ﺠﻴل ﺃﻤـﻰ ﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﻌﺘﺒﺭ ﺍﻻﺒﻥ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻴﻜﺒﺭ ﺍﻟﺭﺠل ﺍﻟﺜـﺎﻨﻰ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻬﻥ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺍﻟﺯﻭﺝ.. ﻴﻌﺘﺒﺭﻨﻪ ﺘﺤﺼﻴﻥ ﺇﻀﺎﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﻀﺩ ﺍﻟﺯﻤﻥ ﻭﺘﻘﻠﺒﺎﺘﻪ..‬
  • 15. ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻋﺎﺩ ﺇﻟﻴﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻟﻠﻤﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻨﻴـﺔ‬ ‫ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﻘﻠﻘﻬﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺒـﺄﻥ ﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﱠ‬ ‫ﻤﺯﺍﺝ ﻤﻌﻴﻥ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻷﻜل ﻭﻋﺎﺩﺍﺕ ﺨﺎﺼﺔ ﻭﺘﺸﻔﻕ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘـﺩﺭﻙ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻤﺎ ﺘﺭﻜﺘﻨﻰ ﻭﻤﺎﺘﺕ..‬ ‫ﱠ‬ ‫ﻭﺃﺼﺒﺤﺕ‬ ‫ﺠﻴﺩﺍ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻟﻥ ﻴﺘﺤﻤﻠﻨﻰ ﺃﺤﺩ ﺴﻭﺍﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﻠﺢ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻤﺴﺄﻟﺔ ﺯﻭﺍﺠﻰ..‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻔﺘﺭﺓ ﻜﻨﺕ ﻗـﺩ ﺘﻌﺭﻓـﺕ ﺒــ‬ ‫"ﻟﻴﻠﻰ "ﻭﺃﺒﺩﻴﺕ ﺭﻏﺒﺘﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺨﻁﺒﺘﻬﺎ.. ﺃﺼﺭﺕ‬ ‫ﻫﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺫﻫﺎﺏ ﻤﻌﻨﺎ ﻟﻤﻨﺯل ﺃﺴﺭﺘﻬﺎ ﻟﻘـﺭﺍﺀﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻔﺎﺘﺤﺔ.. ﻟﻡ ﺘﺴﺘﻤﻊ ﻟﺭﺠـﺎﺌﻰ ﻭﻟﺭﺠـﺎﺀ ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺘﺄﺠﻴل ﺫﻟﻙ ﺤﺘﻰ ﻴﺘﻡ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﻭﺘﺸﻔﻰ.. ﺃﺠﺒﺭﺘﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺘﺤﺩﻴﺩ ﻤﻭﻋﺩ ﻗﺭﻴﺏ.. ﺫﻫﺒـﺕ ﻤﻌﻨـﺎ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﺴﺭﺓ ﻟﻴﻠﻰ ﺘﺴﻜﻥ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﺴﺎﺩﺱ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﺭﻫﻘﻬﺎ ﺼﻌﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﺴـﻠﻡ‬ ‫ﻋﻤﺎﺭﺓ ﺒﺩﻭﻥ ﻤﺼﻌﺩ..‬ ‫ﺤﺘﻰ ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﺴﺎﺩﺱ ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺴﻌﻴﺩﺓ..‬ ‫ﺩﻟﺘﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺃﺤﺒﺕ ﻟﻴﻠﻰ ﻤـﻥ ﺃﻭل ﻟﻘـﺎﺀ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺒﻭﺼﻠﺔ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺒﺩﺍﺨﻠﻬﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﻥ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻔﺘﺎﺓ ﻫـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺴﺘﺭﻴﺤﻨﻰ ﻭﺘﺘﺤﻤﻠﻨـﻰ.. ﻅﻠـﺕ ﻤﺴـﺄﻟﺔ‬
  • 16. ‫ﺯﻭﺍﺠﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺘﺸـﻐﻠﻬﺎ ﺤﺘـﻰ ﻋﻨـﺩﻤﺎ ﺩﺨﻠـﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺍﻟﻌﻭﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻟﺜﺔ ﻟﻠﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻤﻥ ﻭﻗﺕ ﻵﺨﺭ ﺘﻘﻭل ﻷﺒﻰ:‬ ‫ﺍﺸﺘﺭ ﻟﻪ ﺍﻟﺸﺒﻜﺔ .‬
  • 17. ‫-5-‬ ‫:ﻫﺒﻁﺕ ﻤﻌﻨﻭﻴﺎﺕ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﺇﻟـﻰ ﺃﺩﻨـﻰ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻋﻭﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﺩﺭﺠﺎﺘﻬﺎ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺃﺼﺎﺒﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻟﻠﻤﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻟﺜﺔ ﻭﻓﻰ ﺫﺍﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﻜﺎﻥ ﺘﻌﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺍﻨﺘﺼﺎﺭﻩ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﻌﺭﻜـﺔ.. ﻭﺭﺒﻤـﺎ‬ ‫ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﻗﺩ ﺤﺴﻡ ﺍﻟﻤﻌﺭﻜﺔ ﻨﻬﺎﺌﻴﺎ ﻟﺼﺎﻟﺤﻪ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﺤﻘﻕ ﺍﻨﺘﺼﺎﺭﻩ ﺒﻌﻨﺎﺩ ﺸﺩﻴﺩ.. ﻭﺒﺩﺍ ﻟﻰ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻗﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﺴﺘﺴﻠﻤﺕ ﻟﻤﺼﻴﺭﻫﺎ ﻤﻌﻪ ﻭﻓﻘﺩﺕ ﺍﻟﻘﺩﺭﺓ ﻨﻬﺎﺌﻴـﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺘﺤﺩﻴﻪ..‬
  • 18. ‫-6-‬ ‫:ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻨﻘﻁﺔ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺸـﺩﻴﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺤﺴﺎﺴﻴﺔ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﻷﻤـﻰ.. ﺇﻨﻬـﺎ ﻭﺍﺠﺒﺎﺘﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺯﻟﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺘﻨﻅﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻫـﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻭﺍﺠﺒـﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻡ ﺘﻔﻠﺢ ﻤﺤـﺎﻭﻻﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺯﻟﻴﺔ ﻨﻅﺭﺓ ﻤﻘﺩﺴﺔ..‬ ‫ﺃﺒﻰ ﻤﻌﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺇﻗﻨﺎﻋﻬﺎ ﺒﺈﻋﻔﺎﺀ ﻨﻔﺴﻬﺎ ﻤـﻥ ﺘﻠـﻙ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻭﺍﺠﺒﺎﺕ.. ﻭﺭﻓﻀﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﻌﻨﺎﺩ ﺸﺩﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺄﺘﻰ‬ ‫ﺨﺎﺩﻤﺔ ﻟﺘﺅﺩﻯ ﺍﻷﻋﻤﺎل ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺯﻟﻴﺔ ﺒﺩﻻ ﻤﻨﻬـﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻜﻤﺎ ﺭﻓﻀﺕ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻘﻭﻡ ﺸﻘﻴﻘﺘﻰ ﺼﻔﺎﺀ ﺒﻬﺫﻩ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺘﻌﻠل ﺒﺄﻨﻨﺎ ﻗﺩ ﺘﻌﻭﺩﻨﺎ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻋﻤﺎل..‬ ‫ﻁﻌﺎﻤﻬﺎ ﻭﻻ ﻨﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺍﺴﺘﺴـﺎﻏﺔ ﻤـﺎ ﺘﻁﺒﺨـﻪ‬ ‫ﺼﻔﺎﺀ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻷﻤﻰ ﻨﻅﺎﻡ ﺼﺎﺭﻡ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻁﻌﺎﻡ.. ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﺴﺒﺕ ﻻﺒﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻨﺄﻜل ﺍﻟﻤﻜﺭﻭﻨﺔ ﻭﺍﻟﻜﻔﺘﺔ ﻷﻨﻪ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﻐﺴﻴل ﻭﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻭﺠﺒﺔ ﺍﻟﺨﻔﻴﻔـﺔ ﺘﻌـﺩ‬ ‫ﺒﺴﺭﻋﺔ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺠﺎﻨﺏ ﻏﺴل ﺍﻟﻤﻼﺒﺱ ﻭﻨﺸﺭﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﻭﻓﻰ ﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻷﺭﺒﻌﺎﺀ ﻻﺒﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻨﺄﻜل ﺴﻤﻜﺎ.. ﺃﻤـﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 19. ‫ﺒﺎﻗﻰ ﺃﻴﺎﻡ ﺍﻷﺴﺒﻭﻉ ﻓﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﺍﻟﻐﺫﺍﺀ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺦ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻠﺤﻡ ﻴﺅﻜل ﻁﻭﺍل ﺍﻷﺴﺒﻭﻉ ﻓﻴﻤﺎ ﻋﺩﺍ ﺍﻷﺭﺒﻌﺎﺀ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺼﺹ ﻟﻠﺴـﻤﻙ ﻭﺍﻟﺨﻤـﻴﺱ ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺼـﺹ‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺕ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ ﺃﻋﺭﻑ ﻤﺎ ﺴـﺂﻜﻠﻪ ﺩﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻟﻠﺩﺠﺎﺝ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻨﻅﺎﻡ ﺍﻟﻐﺫﺍﺀ ﻨﻅﺎﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺤﺎﺠﺔ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺴﺅﺍل..‬ ‫ﺤﺩﻴﺩﻴﺎ ﻟﻡ ﺘﺴﻤﺢ ﻟﻪ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﺎﻻﺨﺘﻼل ﺘﺤـﺕ ﺃﻯ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻅﺭﻑ.. ﻜل ﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﺘﻌﻠﻕ ﺒﺎﻟﺒﻴـﺕ ﻭﻨﻅﺎﻤـﻪ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻜﺘﺴﺏ ﺍﻟﻘﺩﺍﺴﺔ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻅﺭ ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺎ ﺇﺫﺍ ﺃﻟﺤﺤﻨﺎ ﻓﻰ ﻤﺴﺄﻟﺔ ﺍﻹﻋﻔـﺎﺀ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻭﺍﺠﺒﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺯﻟﻴﺔ ﻭﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﻘﻭﺓ ﺤﺠﺘﻨﺎ ﻭﻟـﻡ‬ ‫ﺘﺴﺘﻁﻊ ﺍﻟﺭﺩ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻁﺎﻟﻌﻨﺎ ﺒﻨﻅـﺭﺓ ﺘﺘﻬﻤﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﻓﻴﻬﺎ ﺒﻘﺘﻠﻬﺎ ﺒﻬﺫﺍ ﺍﻹﻋﻔﺎﺀ ﻤﻥ ﻭﺍﺠﺒﺎﺘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺯﻟﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﻓﺘﻠﺠﻤﻨﺎ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻨﻅﺭﺓ..‬
  • 20. ‫-7-‬ ‫:ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻅﺭﻭﻑ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻭﺠـﺩﺕ‬ ‫ﺫﻫﻨﻰ ﻤﺸﺘﺘﺎ . . . .‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻜﻨـﺕ ﻗـﺩ ﺍﺴـﺘﺠﺒﺕ‬ ‫ﻹﻟﺤﺎﺡ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺒﺘﻜﻤﻠﺔ ﺍﻟﺩﺭﺍﺴﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻌﻠﻴـﺎ..‬ ‫ﱠ‬ ‫ﻭﺘﻘﺩﻤﺕ ﺒﺎﻟﻔﻌل ﻟﺩﺒﻠﻭﻤﺔ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻨﻭﻥ ﺍﻟﻌﺎﻡ.. ﺃﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺘﺨﺭﺠﻰ ﻭﺤﺼﻭﻟﻰ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻠﻴﺴﺎﻨﺱ ﻭﻫﻭ ﻴﻠﺢ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺄﻟﺔ.. ﻟﻡ ﺘﻜﻥ‬ ‫ﻟﺩﻯ ﺍﻟﺭﻏﺒﺔ ﻭﻻ ﺍﻟﺤﻤﺎﺱ.. ﺃﺘﺫﻜﺭ ﺃﻨﻙ ﻜﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﺭﻯ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻻ ﻀﻴﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺨﻭﺽ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺘﺠﺭﺒﺔ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻬﻡ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﺘﻘﺩﻤﺕ ﺒﺎﻟﻔﻌل ﻟﻨﻴل ﺩﺒﻠﻭﻤﺔ ﺍﻟﻘـﺎﻨﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﺃﻅﻥ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻙ ﻓﻰ ﺃﺤﺩ ﺨﻁﺎﺒﺎﺘﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻌﺎﻡ..‬ ‫ﺇﻟﻴﻙ ﺒﺄﻨﻨﺎ ﻨﺩﺭﺱ ﺍﻷﻭﻀـﺎﻉ ﺍﻟﺩﻭﻟﻴـﺔ ﻏﻴـﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺸﺭﻭﻋﺔ.. ﻭﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻨﺒﻐﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻗﺩﻡ ﺒﺤﺜـﹰ‬ ‫ﺎ‬ ‫ﱠ‬ ‫ﻤﺭﺘﺒﻁﺎ ﺒﻬﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﻀﻭﻉ.. ﻭﺃﺫﻜﺭ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﺃﺨﺒﺭﺘﻙ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﺨﺘﻴﺎﺭﻯ ﻟﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺇﺴﺭﺍﺌﻴل ﻜﻤﺜـﺎل ﻟﻸﻭﻀـﺎﻉ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻭﻟﻴﺔ ﻏﻴﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺸـﺭﻭﻋﺔ.. ﻭﻭﺍﻓـﻕ ﺍﻷﺴـﺘﺎﺫ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺸﺭﻑ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺒﺤﺙ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﻀﻭﻉ ﻭﺨﻁـﺔ‬
  • 21. ‫ﺍﻟﺒﺤﺙ.. ﻜﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﺒﺤﺙ ﻴﺴﺘﻨﺩ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺒﺎﺩﺉ ﺍﻟﺘـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﺴﺘﻘﺭﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻘـﺎﻨﻭﻥ ﺍﻟـﺩﻭﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻌـﺎﻡ ﺤـﻭل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺸﺭﻭﻋﻴﺔ ﻜﻤﺒﺩﺃ ﻋﺩﻡ ﺠﻭﺍﺯ ﻀﻡ ﺍﻷﺭﺍﻀـﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻘﻭﺓ..‬ ‫ﻤﻊ ﺘﻘﺩﻡ ﺤﺎﻟـﺔ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﻀـﻴﺔ ﺒـﺩﺃ‬ ‫ﺘﺭﻜﻴﺯﻯ ﻴﺘﺸﺘﺕ . . . .‬ ‫ﻭﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﺄﻨﻨﻰ ﻏﻴـﺭ ﻤﻬﻴـﺄ ﻻﺠﺘﻴـﺎﺯ‬ ‫ﺍﻻﻤﺘﺤﺎﻥ.. ﻭﺍﺘﺨﺫﺕ ﻗـﺭﺍﺭﺍ ﺴـﺭﻴﺎ ﺒﺘﺄﺠﻴـل‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺩﺨﻭﻟﻰ ﺍﻻﻤﺘﺤﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﻭﻤﻊ ﺴﻁﻭﺓ ﺃﺠـﻭﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﻤـﺭﺽ.. ﺒـﺩﺃ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻬﺎﺠﺱ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻨﻰ ﻴﺘﻤﻠﻜﻨﻰ.. ﻭﺒﺩﺃ ﻤﻭﻀـﻭﻉ‬ ‫ﺇﺴﺭﺍﺌﻴل ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﻋﺩ ﺒﺤﺜﻰ ﻋﻨﻪ ﻴﺘﺨﺫ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺫﻫﻨﻰ ﺒﺸﻜل ﻏﺎﻤﺽ ﻭﻤﻠﺘﺒﺱ ﺒﻌﺩﺍ ﺴﺭﻁﺎﻨﻴﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﺃﺼﺒﺤﺕ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻔﻜﺭﺓ ﺘﺸﺩﻨﻰ.. ﻗﻭﺓ ﻏﺎﻤﻀـﺔ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺩﻓﻌﻨﻰ ﻭﺭﺍﺀ ﺍﻻﻨﺴﻴﺎﻕ ﻟﻬﺎﺠﺱ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻹﺴﺭﺍﺌﻴﻠﻰ..‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺘﺴﺎﺀل: ﺘـﺭﻯ ﻤﺘـﻰ ﺒـﺩﺃ ﻫـﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺘﻜﻭﻥ؟ . . . . !‬
  • 22. ‫ﺍﻟﺸﻰﺀ ﺍﻟﻤﺅﻜﺩ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻗﺩ ﺤﺩﺙ ﻓﻰ ﻟﺤﻅـﺔ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﻟﺤﻅﺎﺕ ﻀﻌﻑ ﺍﻟﺠﻬﺎﺯ ﺍﻟﻤﻨـﺎﻋﻰ ﻟﺠﺴـﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻨﻁﻘﺔ.. ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﻫـﻭ ﺍﻨﺤـﻼل ﺍﻟﺩﻭﻟـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻭﺴﻁﻰ ﻓـﻰ ﻤﺼـﺭ ﺍﻟﻘﺩﻴﻤـﺔ.. ﻭﺩﺨـﻭل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻬﻜﺴﻭﺱ ﻤﺼﺭ ﻭﻤﻌﻬﻡ ﺍﻟﻘﺒﻴﻠﺔ ﺍﻹﺴﺭﺍﺌﻴﻠﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﻫﻭ ﺃﻨﺴـﺏ ﺍﻷﻭﻗـﺎﺕ ﻟﺒﺩﺍﻴـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺍﻹﺴـﺭﺍﺌﻴﻠﻰ.. ﺍﻟﺠﺴـﺩ ﺍﻟﻤﺼـﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﻀﻌﻴﻑ ﻭﻤﻨﺎﻋﺘﻪ ﻤﻨﻬﺎﺭﺓ.. ﻭﺍﻟﻘﺒﻴﻠﺔ ﺍﻹﺴﺭﺍﺌﻴﻠﻴﺔ‬ ‫ﺘﺘﻐﺫﻯ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺩﻤﺎﺀ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺠﺴﺩ ﻓﻰ ﻓﺘﺭﺓ ﺤﻀﺎﻨﺔ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﻴﻌـﻭﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﺴﺘﻤﺭﺕ ﻷﻜﺜﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺃﺭﺒﻌﺔ ﻗﺭﻭﻥ..‬ ‫ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻟﻴﻨﻬﺵ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﺴﺩ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻨﻤﺎ ﻓﻴـﻪ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻟﺤﻅﺔ ﻀﻌﻑ ﻤﻨﺎﻋﻰ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ . . . .‬
  • 23. ‫-8-‬ ‫ـﺭﻁﺎﻥ‬‫ـﻙ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﺴـ‬‫ـﻰ ﻋﻠﻴـ‬‫:ﻻ ﺃﺨﻔـ‬ ‫ﺍﻹﺴﺭﺍﺌﻴﻠﻰ ﺃﻋﺎﺩﻨﻰ ﻤﺭﺓ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺴـﺭﻁﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻴﻨﻬﺵ ﻓﻰ ﺠﺴﺩ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﻭﺘﺴﺎﺀﻟﺕ: ﻤﺘـﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺩﺃ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻴﺘﻜﻭﻥ ﻓﻰ ﺠﺴﺩ ﺃﻤﻰ؟ . . . .‬ ‫ﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺘﺫﻜﺭ ﻓﻰ ﺃﻯ ﻭﻗﺕ ﻤﻥ ﺤﻴﺎﺓ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﻻﺒﺩ ﻭﺃﻥ ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﺠﻬﺎﺯﻫـﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﻨـﺎﻋﻰ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﻀﻌﻑ ﺤﺎﻻﺘﻪ.. ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺍﻟﺒﺩﺍﻴـﺔ ﻫـﻰ‬ ‫ﺩﺨﻭل ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﺃﻋﺘﻘﺩ ﺃﻨﻙ ﺭﺃﻴﺕ‬ ‫ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻨﺯﻟﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻘﺩﻴﻡ..‬ ‫ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﺠﺎﺀﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻤﻨﺯﻟﻨﺎ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺯﻭﺍﺝ ﺃﻤﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺴﻨﺔ ﻭﺍﺤﺩﺓ.. ﺠﺎﺀﺕ ﻤﻁﻠﻘﺔ ﻭﺘﺤﻤل ﺍﺒﻨﻬﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ‬ ‫ﻜﺘﻔﻬﺎ.. ﻟﻡ ﻴﺴﺘﻁﻊ ﺯﻭﺠﻬﺎ ﺘﺤﻤل ﺸﺭﺍﺴﺘﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺃﻨﻪ ﺤﺴﺏ ﺍﻟﺘﻘﺎﻟﻴﺩ ﻻﺒﺩ ﻭﺃﻥ ﺘﻌـﻴﺵ‬ ‫ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻨﺯل ﺃﺒﻰ ﺸﻘﻴﻘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻭﺤﻴﺩ..‬ ‫ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﺃﺫﺍﻗﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻜل ﺼﻨﻭﻑ ﺍﻟﻌﺫﺍﺏ..‬ ‫ﺒ ـﺩﺀﺍ ﻤ ـﻥ ﻗ ـﻭﺍﺭﺹ ﺍﻟﻜﻠ ـﻡ.. ﻭﻤ ـﺭﻭﺭﺍ‬ ‫ـ ﹰ‬ ‫ـ‬ ‫ـ ﹰ ـ ـ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻤﺸﺎﺤﻨﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻤﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﻔﺘﻌﻠﺔ.. ﻭﺍﻨﺘﻬﺎﺀ ﺒﺎﻨﺘﺯﺍﻉ‬ ‫‪‬‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﻠﻁﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺒﻴﺕ..‬
  • 24. ‫ﻜل ﻤﺎ ﺍﺴﺘﻁﺎﻉ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻔﻌﻠـﻪ ﻫـﻭ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﻁﺎﻟﺏ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﺼﺒﺭ.. ﻭﺘﻘﺩﻴﺭ ﻤﻭﻗﻔﻪ ﺍﻟﻌﺎﺌﻠﻰ..‬ ‫ﻓﻬﻭ ﻟﻥ ﻴﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﻁﺭﺩ ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻟـﻴﺱ ﻟﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻤﺄﻭﻯ ﻏﻴﺭ ﺒﻴﺘﻪ.. ﻜﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﺨﺸﻰ ﺃﻯ ﺸﻜﺎﻴﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﻟﻌﻤﺘﻰ ﺤﻭل ﻤﻌﺎﻤﻠﺘﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺒﻴﺘﻪ ﻗﺩ ﺘـﺅﺩﻯ ﺇﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘـﺩﺭﻙ‬ ‫ﺇﺴﺎﺀﺓ ﻭﻀﻌﻪ ﺍﻟﻌﺎﺌﻠﻰ..‬ ‫ﺤﺭﺝ ﻤﻭﻗﻑ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻭﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﺩﻓﻌﻬﺎ ﺫﻟﻙ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺯﻴﺩ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺸﺭﺍﺴﺔ ﻤﻊ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺸﺭﺍﺴﺔ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﺯﺩﺍﺩﺕ ﺒﻌـﺩ‬ ‫ﺠﺯﺀ ﻤﻥ ﻁﺒﻴﻌـﺔ ﻋﻤﺘـﻰ..‬ ‫‪‬‬ ‫ﻁﻼﻗﻬﺎ.. ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺸﺭﺴﺔ ﺤﺘﻰ ﻤﻊ ﺃﻤﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﺃﺤﺩ ﻴﺠﺭﺅ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻫﻰ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺼﺩﻯ ﻟﻬﺎ.. ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﻘﻬﺭ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺘﻌﺭﻀﺕ‬ ‫ﻟﻪ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻴﺩ ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﻫـﻭ ﺍﻟـﺫﻯ ﺃﻀـﻌﻑ‬ ‫ﺠﻬﺎﺯﻫﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺎﻋﻰ ﻭﻤﻬﺩ ﻟﻅﻬﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻤﺎﺘﺕ ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻗـﺩ ﺘﺭﻜـﺕ‬ ‫ﻷﻤﻰ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻜﺒﺩﻴل ﻋﻨﻬﺎ . . . .‬
  • 25. ‫-9-‬ ‫:ﺃﺘﺫﻜﺭ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﻜـﺎﻥ ﻟﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻤﻁﻠﺏ ﻭﺤﻴﺩ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ.. ﺃﻥ ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺒﻴـﺕ‬ ‫ﻤﺴﺘﻘل.. ﺒﻴﺕ ﻻ ﺘﺸﺎﺭﻜﻬﺎ ﻓﻴﻪ ﺃﻯ ﺍﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﻭﺘﺸﻌﺭ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺴﻴﺩﺘﻪ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻔﻬﻡ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ؟ ..!‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺒﻴﺕ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﺴﺎﻭﻯ ﻋﻨﺩ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺍﻤـﺭﺃﺓ‬ ‫ﺤﻘﻴﻘﻴﺔ.. ﻻ ﻴﻬﻡ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺒﻴﺕ ﻓﺨﻤـﺎ ﺃﻭ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬـﺎ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺃﻯ ﺤـﺎل‬ ‫ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﻤﺘﻭﺍﻀﻌﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺘﺭﺘﻴﺒﻪ ﻭﺘﻨﻅﻴﻤﻪ ﺩﻭﻥ ﺘﺩﺨل ﻤﻥ ﺃﺤﺩ..‬ ‫ﺒﻴﺕ ﻻ ﻴﻬﻤﺵ ﻓﻴﻪ ﺩﻭﺭﻫـﺎ ﺇﻟـﻰ ﻫـﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺤـﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺅﻟﻡ.. ﺍﻟﺘﺠﺭﺒﺔ ﺃﺜﺒﺘﺕ ﻟـﻰ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻯ ﺒﻴـﺕ ﻻ‬ ‫ﻴﺤﺘﻤل ﺃﻜﺜﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﻭﺍﺤﺩﺓ..‬ ‫ﻻ ﺘﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺘﺼﻭﺭ ﻓﺭﺤﺘﻬﺎ ﻋﻨـﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﻨﺒﻨﻰ ﺸﻘﺘﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﺠﺩﻴﺩﺓ.. ﻜﺎﻥ ﺨﺎﻟﻰ ﻗﺩ ﺴﻤﺢ ﻟﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﺸﻘﺔ ﻭﺍﺴﻌﺔ ﻤﻜﻭﻨﺔ‬ ‫ﺒﺒﻨﺎﺀ ﺩﻭﺭ ﻓﻭﻕ ﻋﻤﺎﺭﺘﻪ..‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺴﺕ ﻏﺭﻑ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﻨﺎ ﻨﺫﻫﺏ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺸﻘﺔ ﺃﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﺃﻋﻤﺎل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺸﻁﻴﺏ.. ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺸـﻌﺭ ﺒﺄﻨﻬـﺎ ﻻ ﺘﺭﻴـﺩ ﺃﻥ‬
  • 26. ‫ﺘﻐﺎﺩﺭﻫﺎ.. ﻜﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﺨﺸﻰ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺘﺒﺨﺭ ﺍﻟﺸﻘﺔ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﺘﺭﻜﻨﺎﻫﺎ.. ﻭﻜﻨﺎ ﻨﺘﻨﺎﺯﻉ ﻤﻥ ﺤﻭﻟﻬﺎ.. ﻜل ﻤﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﻴﺭﻴﺩ ﻏﺭﻓﺔ ﻤﺴﺘﻘﻠﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﺘﻘﺭﺭ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻋﺘﺯﺍﺯ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺨﺎﻁﺒﻨﻰ:‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺒﻨﺎﺕ ﻓﻰ ﻏﺭﻓﺔ.. ﻭﺃﻨﺕ ﻓﻰ ﻏﺭﻓﺔ..‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺘﺩﻭﺭ ﻓﻰ ﺃﺭﺠﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﺸﻘﺔ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻟﻡ ﺘﻌـﺩ‬ ‫ﺒﻌﺩ ﻟﻠﺴﻜﻨﻰ.. ﻭﺘﺘﻭﻗﻑ ﻋﻨﺩ ﺇﺤﺩﻯ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻑ..‬ ‫ﺘﻘﻭل ﻟﻨﺎ:‬ ‫ﻭﻫﺫﻩ ﻏﺭﻓﺔ‬ ‫ﻫﺫﻩ ﻏﺭﻓﺘﻰ ﺃﻨﺎ ﻭﻭﺍﻟﺩﻜﻡ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﺎﻟﻭﻥ.. ﺃﻤﺎ ﻫﺫﻩ ﻓﻐﺭﻓﺔ ﺍﻟﺴـﻔﺭﺓ.. ﻭﻫﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺘﺭﻴﻪ ﻟﻼﺴﺘﻘﺒﺎل .‬ ‫ﺤﺘـﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﻜﺩﻨﺎ ﻨﺴﺘﻘﺭ ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺸﻘﺔ..‬ ‫ﻀﻤﺕ ﻏﺭﻓﺘﻬﺎ ﺜﻼﺜﺘﻬﻡ.. ﻫﻰ ﻭﺃﺒﻰ ﻭﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ‬ ‫....‬ ‫ﺍﻋﺫﺭﻨﻰ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻜﻨـﺕ ﺃﺘﺤـﺩﺙ‬ ‫ﻜﺜﻴﺭﺍ.. ﺃﻭ ﺃﺘﺤﺩﺙ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻭﻀﻭﻋﺎﺕ ﻓﺭﻋﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺎ ﺃﺘﻜﻠﻡ ﺒﺩﻭﻥ ﺨﻁﺔ.. ﻓﻘﻁ ﺃﺭﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺘﻜﻠﻡ..‬ ‫ﺃﺒﻭﺡ.. ﺃﻓﺭﻍ ﻤﺎ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻔﺴﻰ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻔﻬﻤﻨﻰ؟. . . . !‬
  • 27. ‫- 01 -‬ ‫:ﻜﺜﻴﺭﺍ ﻤﺎ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺘﺴﺎﺀل ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻋـﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺸﻌﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﻔﻘﺩ ﺜﺩﻴﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻴﺨﻴل ﺇﻟﻰ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﻔﻘﺩ ﺜـﺩﻴﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﱠ‬ ‫ﺘﺒﺩﺃ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻅﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻨﻔﺴﻬﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺍﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﻏﻴﺭ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻤﻠﺔ.. ﺇﻥ ﺒﺘﺭ ﺃﻯ ﺠﺯﺀ ﻤﻥ ﺤﺴﺩ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﻗـﺩ‬ ‫ﻻ ﻴﺨل ﺒﺄﻨﻭﺜﺘﻬﺎ.. ﺇﻻ ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﺍﻤﺭﺃﺓ.. ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﺃﻤﻭﻤـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﻋﻁﺎﺀ.. ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﺤﻴﺎﺓ..‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﺘﺘﺤﺩﺙ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻥ ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭﻫﺎ ﺘﺠﺎﻩ ﺒﺘﺭ‬ ‫ﺜﺩﻴﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻻ ﺃﻋﺭﻑ ﻜﻴﻑ ﻫﻴﺄﺕ ﻨﻔﺴـﻬﺎ ﻟﺘﻘﻀـﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻗﻰ ﻋﻤﺭﻫﺎ ﺒﺜﺩﻯ ﻤﺒﺘﻭﺭ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻭﺍﺠﻪ ﺍﻟﻨﺎﺱ ﻋﻨﺩ ﺨﺭﻭﺠﻬﺎ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺯل ﺒﻭﻀﻊ ﻜﻤﻴﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ ﻤﻜـﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﺜـﺩﻯ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺒﺘﻭﺭ ﺤﺘﻰ ﻻ ﻴﻼﺤﻅ ﺍﻟﻨﺎﺱ ﺃﻯ ﺨﻠل ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻨﻁﻘﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺠﺴﺩﻫﺎ..‬
  • 28. ‫ﻟﻡ ﺃﺠﺭﺅ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺴﺅﺍﻟﻬﺎ ﻋـﻥ ﻤﺸـﺎﻋﺭﻫﺎ‬ ‫ﺘﺠﺎﻩ ﺒﺘﺭ ﺜﺩﻴﻬﺎ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻨﻰ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺩﺭﻙ ﺃﻥ ﻫـﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺒﺘﺭ ﻗﺩ ﺘﺭﻙ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻔﺴﻬﺎ ﺠﺭﺤﺎ ﻏﺎﺌﺭﺍ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﺍﺴﺘﻁﻌﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺤﺩﺜﻙ ﻋﻥ ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﺘﺠﺎﻩ ﺜﺩﻯ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺒﺘﻭﺭ..‬ ‫ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﻴﺨﺹ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻭﺤﺩﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﻴﺨﺹ ﻤﻥ ﺃﺭﻀﻌﻬﻡ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ ﻤﺼﺩﺭ ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻬﻡ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺍﻟﻤﻴﻼﺩ‬ ‫ﺒﺘﺭ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ ﻜـﺎﻥ ﻴﻌﻨـﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﺤﺘﻰ ﺍﻟﻔﻁﺎﻡ..‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﻟﻰ ﺒﺘﺭ ﺠﺯﺀ ﻫﺎﻡ ﻤﻥ ﺘﺎﺭﻴﺨﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺒﻜﺭ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ‬ ‫ﻭﻴﻭﻓﺭ ﻟﻰ ﺇﻤﻜﺎﻨﻴﺔ ﺍﺴﺘﻤﺭﺍﺭﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻤﺅﻟﻤﺎ ﻟﻠﻐﺎﻴﺔ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻠﻘﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺴﻠﺔ ﻤﻬﻤﻼﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺍﻟﺠﺭﺍﺤﺔ.. ﻫـﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺃﺭﻀﻌﻙ ﻭﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻨﻤﺕ ﻋﻠﻴﻪ ﻭﺃﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﺎﻟﺸﺒﻊ ﻭﺍﻻﻁﻤﺌﻨﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺤﺩﺙ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻥ ﺒﻌﺜﻨﺎ ﻴـﻭﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﻴﺎﻤﺔ.. ﺘﻌﻤﺩﺕ ﺇﻓﻬﺎﻤﻬﺎ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻹﻨﺴـﺎﻥ ﻴﺒﻌـﺙ‬
  • 29. ‫ﺒﺠﺴﺩﻩ ﻜﺎﻤﻼ.. ﺤﺘﻰ ﻤﻥ ﻭﻟﺩ ﺒﻌﺎﻫﺔ ﻜـﺎﻟﻌﻤﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻴﺒﻌﺙ ﺒﺼﻴﺭﺍ.. ﻭﺃﻥ ﻤﻥ ﺒﺘﺭﺕ ﻴﺩﻩ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟـﺩﻨﻴﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﻌﻭﺩ ﻟﻪ ﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﻘﻴﺎﻤﺔ.. ﻟﻡ ﺃﺤﺩﺜﻬﺎ ﻋﻥ ﺜﺩﻴﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﺃﺩﺭﻜﺕ ﻤﺎ ﺃﺭﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻗﻭﻟـﻪ.. ﺃﺩﺭﻜﺘـﻪ‬ ‫ﺒﺸﻌﻭﺭ ﻋﻤﻴﻕ ﺒﺎﻻﺭﺘﻴﺎﺡ..‬
  • 30. ‫- 11 -‬ ‫:ﻜﺎﻥ ﻻﺒﺩ ﻤﻥ ﺒﺩﺀ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ..‬ ‫ﻻ ﺃﺨﻔﻰ ﻋﻠﻴﻙ ﺴﺭﺍ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤـﻭﺩ ﻓﺄﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻗﺩﺭﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﻯ ﺍﻟﻤﺎﻟﻴﺔ‬ ‫ﻟﺴﺕ ﻏﺭﻴﺒﺎ ﻋﻨﻰ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻗﺩ ﺘﻭﻗﻔﺕ ﻋﻨﺩ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺤﺩ.. ﻻ ﺘﺘﺼﻭﺭ ﻜﻡ ﻫـﻭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻌـﻼﺝ‬ ‫ﻤﻜﻠﻑ ﻋﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻓﻰ ﺒﻠـﺩﻨﺎ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻨﻔﻘﺘﻙ ﺍﻟﺨﺎﺼﺔ ﻻﺒﺩ ﻭﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﻌﺠﺯﻙ.. ﻴﺼﺒﺢ ﻓـﻭﻕ ﻗـﺩﺭﺓ ﺃﻯ ﺸـﺨﺹ‬ ‫ﻤﺘﻭﺴﻁ ﺍﻟﺤـﺎل.. ﻫـل ﺘﺘﺼـﻭﺭ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺩﻭﻴـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻴﺔ ﺘﺒﺎﻉ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺴﻭﻕ ﺍﻟﺴـﻭﺩﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﺒﺄﻀﻌﺎﻑ ﺜﻤﻨﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺤﻘﻴﻘﻰ.. ﻫل ﺘﺘﺨﻴل ﺃﻥ ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﻭﻅﻴﻔﺘﻪ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺘﻌـﺎﺩل ﺩﺭﺠـﺔ ﻭﻜﻴـل ﻭﺯﺍﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻭﻋﻀﻭﻴﺘﻪ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺠﻠﺱ ﺍﻟﻨﻴﺎﺒﻰ ﻭﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻴﺨﺎﻁﺒﻪ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﺎﺱ "ﻓﻼﻥ ﺒﻙ "ﻴﻌﺠﺯ ﻋﻥ ﺍﺴﺘﻜﻤﺎل ﻋـﻼﺝ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﺃﻟﻴﺱ ﺫﻟﻙ ﻤﻬﻴﻨﺎ؟ . . . . !‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻻ ﺘﻘل ﻟﻰ ﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻟﻡ ﺘﻁﻠﺏ ﻤﻨﻰ ﻨﻘﻭﺩﺍ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﺎﻟﻨﻘﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺘﺠﻤﻌﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﺒﺔ ﻟﻤﺩﺓ ﻋـﺎﻡ ﻻ‬ ‫ﺘﻜﻔﻰ ﺸﻬﺭﺍ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ ﺒﺄﺴﻌﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﺴﻭﻕ‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 31. ‫ﺍﻟﺴﻭﺩﺍﺀ.. ﺍﻟﺠﺭﺍﺤﺔ ﻭﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻹﺸﻌﺎﻋﻰ ﻜﺎﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻤﻘﺩﺭﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﻯ ﺍﻟﻤﺎﻟﻴﺔ.. ﺃﻤﺎ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ‬ ‫ﻓﻔﻭﻕ ﺍﻟﻘﺩﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﻭﺒﺩﺃﻨﺎ ﺭﺤﻠﺔ ﻤﻀﻨﻴﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺃﺠـل ﺍﻟﻌـﻼﺝ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺠﺎﻨﻰ..‬ ‫ﺴﻴﺎﺴﺔ ﺍﻟﻜﻌﺏ ﺍﻟﺩﺍﺌﺭ ﺒـﻴﻥ ﺍﻟﻘﻭﻤﺴـﻴﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻰ ﻭﻭﺯﺍﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﺼﺤﺔ ﻭﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺍﻟﻘـﺎﻫﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺘﺨﺼﺹ.. ﻭﺁﻩ ﻤـﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸـﻔﻰ.. ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻴﺎﺘﻨﺎ ﻴﻨﻅﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﻴﺽ ﻤﻬﻤـﺎ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺤﺎﻟﺘﻪ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻤﺠﺭﺩ ﺸﻰﺀ.. ﻻﻤﺒﺎﻻﺓ ﺭﻫﻴﺒﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﻋﻠﻴﻙ ﺇﺫﺍ ﺃﺭﺩﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺸﺘﺭﻯ ﻟﻨﻔﺴﻙ ﺍﻟﻤﻌﺎﻤﻠـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻹﻨﺴﺎﻨﻴﺔ . . . .‬
  • 32. ‫- 21 -‬ ‫:ﺴﺄﺤﻜﻰ ﻟﻙ ﻋﻥ ﻤﻭﻗـﻑ ﺭﺒﻤـﺎ ﺒـﺩﺍ‬ ‫ﻏﺭﻴﺒﺎ ﻭﻤﺅﻟﻤﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺍﻟﻘـﺎﻫﺭﻯ ﺍﻟﻤﺘﺨﺼـﺹ‬ ‫ﺍﺤﺘﺎﺠﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺃﺤﺩ ﺃﺩﻭﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺒﺸـﻜل‬ ‫ﻋﺎﺠل.. ﻭﺍﻜﺘﺸﻑ ﺍﻷﻁﺒﺎﺀ ﺃﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺍﺀ ﻏﻴﺭ‬ ‫ﻤﻭﺠﻭﺩ ﺒﺼﻴﺩﻟﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ..‬ ‫ﺃﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻜﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﺤل ﻟﺩﻴﻬﻡ؟ ..!!‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﻭﺍ ﻻﺒﺩ ﻤﻥ ﺘﺸـﻜﻴل ﻟﺠﻨـﺔ ﻭﻁـﺭﺡ‬ ‫ﻤﻨﺎﻗﺼﺔ ﻟﺸﺭﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺍﺀ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺃﺒﻰ ﻟﻠﻤﺩﻴﺭ ﺍﻹﺩﺍﺭﻯ ﻟﻠﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ:‬ ‫ﺤﺘﻰ ﻴﺘﻡ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺘﻜﻭﻥ ﺯﻭﺠﺘﻰ ﻗﺩ ﻤﺎﺘﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﺭﺩ ﺍﻟﻤﺩﻴﺭ ﺍﻹﺩﺍﺭﻯ ﺒﺒﺭﻭﺩ:‬ ‫ﻫﺫﻩ ﻫﻰ ﺍﻟﻠﻭﺍﺌﺢ .‬ ‫ﻓﻘﺎل ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﻌﺼﺒﻴﺔ:‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﺤﺘﺎﺝ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟـﺩﻭﺍﺀ ﺒﺸـﻜل‬ ‫ﻋﺎﺠل .‬ ‫ﻭﺭﺩ ﺍﻟﻤﺩﻴﺭ ﺍﻹﺩﺍﺭﻯ ﺒﺫﺍﺕ ﺍﻟﺒﺭﻭﺩ:‬ ‫ﻻ ﺤل ﺴﻭﻯ ﻟﺠﻨﺔ ﻭ ﻤﻨﺎﻗﺼﺔ .‬
  • 33. ‫ﻭﻜـﺎﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻴﺤـﺩﺙ‬ ‫ﻴﻭﻤﻬﺎ ﺜﺎﺭ ﺃﺒـﻰ..‬ ‫ﺍﺸﺘﺒﺎﻙ ﺒﺎﻷﻴﺩﻯ ﻟﻭﻻ ﺘﺩﺨﻠﻰ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺃﺒﻰ ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﻻ ﺃﺯﺍل ﺃﻤﺴﻙ ﺒﻪ:‬ ‫ﺴﺄﺫﻫﺏ ﺇﻟـﻰ ﻤﻜﺘـﺏ ﺍﻟـﻭﺯﻴﺭ ﻭﺃﻗـﺩﻡ‬ ‫ﺸﻜﻭﻯ.‬ ‫ﻭﻗﺒل ﺃﻥ ﻴﻐﺎﺩﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﻫﺩﺩﻫﻡ:‬ ‫ﺇﺫﺍ ﻤﺎﺘﺕ ﺯﻭﺠﺘﻰ ﺒﺴـﺒﺏ ﻨﻘـﺹ ﻫـﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺍﺀ.. ﺴﺄﺒﻠﻎ ﻋﻨﻜﻡ ﺍﻟﻨﻴﺎﺒﺔ ﺍﻟﻌﺎﻤﺔ ﺒﺘﻬﻤﺔ ﺍﻟﻘﺘل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻌﻤﺩ .‬ ‫ﺒﻌﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻋﻠﻤﻭﺍ ﺃﻨـﻪ ﻋﻀـﻭ ﺒـﺎﻟﻤﺠﻠﺱ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻴﺎﺒﻰ ﺃﻋﺎﺩﻭﻩ.. ﻭﺠﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺍﺀ..‬
  • 34. ‫- 31 -‬ ‫:ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﻟـﻪ ﻤﺸـﺎﻜﻠﻪ‬ ‫ﻓﺎﻵﺜﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﺠﺎﻨﺒﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻴﺤﺩﺜﻬﺎ ﺍﺴﺘﺨﺩﺍﻡ‬ ‫ﺃﻴﻀﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺘﺘﻁﻠـﺏ ﺍﻟﺤـﺫﺭ ﻭﺍﻟﻤﺘﺎﺒﻌـﺔ‬ ‫ﻓﺎﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻴﺎﺕ ﺒﺎﻹﻀﺎﻓﺔ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺇﺤـﺩﺍﺜﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻗﻴﻘﺔ..‬ ‫ﻀﻌﻑ ﻋﺎﻡ ﻟﻠﺠﺴﻡ ﻭﺸﻌﻭﺭ ﺒﺎﻟﻐﺜﻴﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﺸﺩﻴﺩ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺤﺩﺙ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺍﻨﺨﻔﺎﻀﺎ ﺨﻁﻴﺭﺍ ﻓﻰ ﻋـﺩﺩ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻜﺭﺍﺕ ﺍﻟﺩﻡ ﺍﻟﺒﻴﻀﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻫﻰ ﺠﺯﺀ ﺃﺴﺎﺴﻰ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺘﻜﻭﻴﻥ ﺍﻟﺠﻬﺎﺯ ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺎﻋﻰ ﻭﺫﻟﻙ ﻴﺘﻁﻠﺏ ﻋﻼﺠـﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﻜﻤﻴﻠﻴﺎ ﻟﺘﻌﻭﻴﺽ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺹ ﺍﻟﺤﺎﺩ ﻓﻰ ﻜـﺭﺍﺕ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻡ ﺍﻟﺒﻴﻀﺎﺀ .‬ ‫ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﺴﺘﻌﺩﺍﺩ ﻟﺘﻘﺒل ﻜل‬ ‫ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻵﺜﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﺠﺎﻨﺒﻴﺔ ﻟﻠﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ.. ﺇﻻ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﻟﺩﻴﻬﺎ ﻨﻔﺱ ﺍﻻﺴـﺘﻌﺩﺍﺩ ﻟﺘﻘﺒـل ﺍﻷﺜـﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺠﺎﻨﺒﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺘﻤﺜل ﻓﻰ ﺘﺴﺎﻗﻁ ﺸﻌﺭ ﺍﻟﺭﺃﺱ..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬـﺎ ﻜﻌﺎﺩﺘﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﺫﻟﻙ ﻴﺤﺯﻨﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺘﺠﺎﻫل ﺍﻟﺤﺩﻴﺙ ﻋﻤﺎ ﻴﺤﺯﻨﻬﺎ ﻭﻴﺅﻟﻤﻬﺎ..‬
  • 35. ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻨﻰ ﺍﺴﺘﻁﻌﺕ ﻴﻭﻤﺎ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻟﻤـﺢ ﻫـﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺤﺯﻥ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺸﻘﻴﻘﺘﻰ "ﺼـﻔﺎﺀ "ﻗـﺩ ﺤﻤﻤﺘﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻭﺃﺨﺫﺕ ﺘﻤﺸﻁ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺸﻌﺭﻫﺎ.. ﻭﺘﺴـﺎﻗﻁ ﺸـﻌﺭ‬ ‫ﻭﺭﺃﻴﺘﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺭﺃﺱ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﻐﺯﺍﺭﺓ ﺃﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﺘﻤﺸﻴﻁ..‬ ‫ﻭﻗﺩ ﺘﻨﺎﻭﻟﺕ ﺒﻌﺽ ﺍﻟﺸﻌﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺘﺴﺎﻗﻁ ﻓﻰ ﻴﺩﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﻭﻨﻅﺭﺕ ﺇﻟﻴﻪ ﺒﺤﺯﻥ.. ﺜﻡ ﺘﺭﻜﺘﻪ ﻴﺴـﻘﻁ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﺩﻫﺎ . . . .‬
  • 36. ‫- 41 -‬ ‫:ﺒﻌﺩ ﺍﻟﻌﻭﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻟﺜﺔ ﻟﻠﻭﺭﻡ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﻴـﺙ..‬ ‫ﺼﺎﺭﺤﺕ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﻀﺭﻭﺭﺓ ﺍﺴﺘﺩﻋﺎﺀ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻤﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ ﻗﺎل ﻟﻰ ﺒﺄﻥ ﺍﻟﻭﻗـﺕ ﻻ ﻴـﺯﺍل‬ ‫ﻟﻨﺩﻥ..‬ ‫ﻤﺒﻜﺭﺍ ﻻﺘﺨﺎﺫ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺨﻁﻭﺓ.. ﺃﺼﺎﺭﺤﻙ ﺃﻨﻨـﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﻀﺎﻴﻘﺕ ﻤﻥ ﻤﻭﻗﻑ ﺃﺒﻰ.. ﻓﻤـﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﻤﻜـﻥ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﺘﻤﻭﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﻰ ﻟﺤﻅﺔ.. ﻭﻟﻥ ﻨﻐﻔﺭ ﻷﻨﻔﺴﻨﺎ ﺃﻨﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﻨﻤﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺭﺅﻴﺔ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ .."ﻭ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺃﻴﻀﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻟﻥ ﺘﻐﻔﺭ ﻟﻨﺎ ﻫﺫﺍ..‬ ‫ﺒﻌﺩ ﻋﺩﺓ ﺸﻬﻭﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺤﺩﻴﺜﻰ ﻤـﻊ ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﺤﺩﺙ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺯﻭﺝ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺘﻠﻴﻔﻭﻨﻴﺎ.. ﺸﺭﺡ ﻟـﻪ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻭﻀﻊ ﻭﺃﻜﺩ ﻟﻪ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻀﺭﻭﺭﺓ ﻤﺠﻰﺀ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻷﻭﻻﺩ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻤﺼﺭ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ ﻨﺒﻬﻪ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺇﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﺘﺄﺘﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺄﻟﺔ ﺒﺸﻜل ﻁﺒﻴﻌﻰ.. ﻭﺍﻗﺘﺭﺡ ﻋﻠﻴﻪ‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﻴﻔﻬﻡ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺒﺄﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﻔﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻤﺼﺭ ﺒﻤﺒﺎﺩﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻤﻨﻪ ﻟﺸﻌﻭﺭﻩ ﺒﻘﻠﻕ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﻤﻬﺎ ﻭﺭﻏﺒﺘـﻪ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻨﺯﻭﻟﻬﺎ ﺇﻟـﻰ ﻤﺼـﺭ ﻟﻼﻁﻤﺌﻨـﺎﻥ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺼﺤﺘﻬﺎ..‬
  • 37. ‫ﺯﻭﺝ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺤﺠﺯ ﻟﻬﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﻭل ﻁﺎﺌﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻤﺘﺠﻬﺔ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ.. ﻭﺘﻘﺭﺭ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺫﻫﺏ ﻤﻊ ﺃﺒﻰ‬ ‫ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﻻﺴﺘﻘﺒﺎل "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺒﺎﻟﻤﻁﺎﺭ.. ﻜﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻟﺨﺒﺭ ﻤﺠﻰﺀ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺃﺜﺭ ﻜﺒﻴﺭﺍ ﻓـﻰ ﺘﺤﺴـﻴﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﺴﻴﺔ ﻷﻤﻰ..‬
  • 38. ‫- 51 -‬ ‫:ﻜﺜﻴﺭﺍ ﻤﺎ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺘﺴﺎﺀل: ﻤﺘﻰ ﺒﺩﺃﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﺴﺘﺸﻌﺭ ﺍﻟﻨﻬﺎﻴﺔ؟ . . . .‬ ‫ﺃﻋﺘﻘﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺫﻟﻙ ﺤﺩﺙ ﻋﻘﺏ ﺍﻟﻌﻭﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻨﻴﺔ‬ ‫ﻟﻠﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﺃﺼﺒﺤﺕ ﺘﺼﺭﻓﺎﺘﻬﺎ ﺘﺸـﻰ ﺒﺎﻹﺤﺴـﺎﺱ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻤﻐﺎﺩﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻭﺸﻴﻜﺔ..‬ ‫ﻻﺯﻤﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻗﺭﺍﺀﺓ ﺍﻟﻤﺼﺤﻑ.. ﺭﺒﻤـﺎ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺭﻤﻀﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻗﻀﺕ ﺃﻏﻠﺏ ﻭﻗﺘﻬﺎ ﻤﻊ ﺍﻟﻘﺭﺁﻥ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺎﻀﻰ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺤﺭﻴﺼﺔ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﺩﺍﺀ ﺼﻼﺓ ﺍﻟﻔﺠﺭ‬ ‫ﺤﺎﻀﺭﺍ ﻭﺠﻤﺎﻋﺔ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﻟﻰ:‬ ‫ﺴﻤﻌﺕ ﺃﻥ ﻤﻥ ﻴﺼﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻔﺠـﺭ ﺃﺭﺒﻌـﻴﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﻭﻤﺎ ﻤﺘﻭﺍﺼﻠﺔ ﻏﻔﺭ ﺍﷲ ﻟﻪ ﺫﻨﻭﺒﻪ .‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻴﺴﺎﻤﺤﻨﻰ ﺍﷲ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺴﻬﺭ ﻟﺼـﻼﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻔﺠﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺃﺠﻠﻬﺎ ﻫﻰ.. ﻟـﻡ ﺃﻜـﻥ ﺃﺤـﺏ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﺃﺤﺭﻤﻬﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺼﻼﺓ ﺍﻟﻔﺠﺭ ﻭﺜﻭﺍﺏ ﺍﻟﺠﻤﺎﻋـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻴﻨﺎﻡ ﻤﺒﻜﺭﺍ ﻭﻻ ﻴﻠﺤﻕ ﺼـﻼﺓ ﺍﻟﻔﺠـﺭ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺤﺎﻀﺭﺍ.. ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺴﻬﺭ ﻤﺘﺭﺒﺼﺎ ﻟﻠﻔﺠﺭ.. ﺜـﻡ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 39. ‫ﺃﻭﻗﻅﻬﺎ.. ﻭﺃﺼﻠﻰ ﺒﻬﺎ ﺇﻤﺎﻤﺎ.. ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺘﺤـﺏ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻷﺨﺹ ﺴﻭﺭﺘﻰ "ﻴﺱ "ﻭ "ﺍﻟﻤﻠﻙ .."‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﻟﻰ ﻴﻭﻤﺎ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺴﻭﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻤﻠﻙ ﺘﻨﺠﻰ ﻤﻥ ﻋﺫﺍﺏ ﺍﻟﻘﺒﺭ .‬ ‫ﻓﻘﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ ﻤﺩﺍﻋﺒﺎ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻫل ﻴﻌﺫﺏ ﺍﷲ ﺍﻟﻤﻼﺌﻜﺔ؟!‬ ‫ﻓﺭﺩﺕ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺒﺤﺯﻥ:‬ ‫ﱠ‬ ‫ﻜﺘﺭ ﺨﻴﺭﻙ ﻴﺎﺒﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻀﻁﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﺠﺎﻟﺴـﺔ ﻷﻥ‬ ‫ﺤﺭﻜﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻭﻗﻭﻑ ﻭﺍﻟﺭﻜﻭﻉ ﻭﺍﻟﺴﺠﻭﺩ ﺃﺼـﺒﺤﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﺭﻫﻘﻬﺎ ﺒﺸﺩﺓ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺄﻟﺔ ﺘﺅﺭﻗﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻭﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺼﻠﻰ ﻭﺍﻗﻔﺔ.. ﻜﺜﻴﺭﺍ ﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﺤﺎﻭل ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﻭﻗﻭﻓﺎ ﺜﻡ ﺘﻀﻁﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﻠـﻭﺱ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻤﻨﺘﺼﻑ ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﺎﻟﺘﻌﺏ..‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﻓﻰ ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻬﺎ ﻤﺎ ﻫﻭ ﺃﻗﺩﺱ ﻤـﻥ ﺍﻟﺼـﻼﺓ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﻭﺍﺠﺒﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺯﻟﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﺘﻌﻠﻤﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﻓﻰ ﺴﻥ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻤﻨﺔ..‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻤﺘﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻡ ﺘﻨﻘﻁﻊ ﻋﻥ ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺘﻌﻠﻤﺘﻬﺎ..‬
  • 40. ‫ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﻓﻰ ﻤﺜل ﺍﻟﺴﻥ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺘﻌﻠﻤﺘﻬﺎ ﻓﻴﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻡ ﺘﻜﻥ ﺘﺘﺴﺎﻤﺢ ﻤﻌﻰ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺃﺘﻜﺎﺴل ﻓﻰ ﺃﺩﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ.. ﻻﺯﻟﺕ ﺤﺘﻰ ﺍﻵﻥ ﺃﺼﻠﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﻁﺭﻴﻘـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻋﻠﻤﺘﻨﻰ ﺒﻬﺎ.. ﻭﺃﺭﺩﺩ ﺫﺍﺕ ﺍﻷﺩﻋﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﺘـﻰ‬ ‫ﻟﻘﻨﺘﻨﻰ ﺇﻴﺎﻫﺎ.. ﺤﺘﻰ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﺒـﺭﺕ ﻭﻋﺭﻓـﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﺩﻋﻴﺔ ﺃﻓﻀل ﻤﻥ ﺘﻠﻙ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻋﻠﻤﺘﻬﺎ ﻟـﻰ.. ﻟـﻡ‬ ‫ﺃﻜﻥ ﺃﺼﻠﻰ ﺇﻻ ﺒﺄﺩﻋﻴﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﻭﻜﺄﻥ ﺼـﻼﺘﻰ‬ ‫ﻟﻥ ﺘﻜﻭﻥ ﻤﻘﺒﻭﻟﺔ ﺇﻻ ﺒﺄﺩﻋﻴﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺩﺨﻠﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸـﻔﻰ ﻓـﻰ ﺍﻟﻤـﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺨﻴﺭﺓ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺤﺭﻴﺼﺔ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺇﻗﺎﻤﺔ ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﻭﻗﺎﺘﻬﺎ.. ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﺴـﻤﻊ ﺼـﻭﺕ ﺍﻷﺫﺍﻥ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺠﺩ ﺍﻟﻘﺭﻴﺏ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺘﻁﻠﺏ ﺇﺤﻀـﺎﺭ‬ ‫ﻤﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﻭﻀﻭﺀ ﻭﺘﻌﺩﻴل ﻭﻀـﻌﻬﺎ ﺇﻟـﻰ ﻨﺎﺤﻴـﺔ‬ ‫ﺘﺘﻭﻀﺄ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻴﺭ ﻭﺘﺼﻠﻰ ﻭﻫـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺒﻠﺔ..‬ ‫ﺠﺎﻟﺴﺔ..‬ ‫ﺃﺘﺫﻜﺭ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺃﺤﺩ ﺍﻷﻴﺎﻡ ﺘﻨﺎﻭﻟـﺕ ﺩﻭﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﻤﺴﻜﻥ ﻴﺤﺘﻭﻯ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻤﺨﺩﺭ.. ﻭﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺘﻔﺘﻘـﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺭﻜﻴﺯ ﺒﺴﺒﺏ ﺍﻟﻤﺨـﺩﺭ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬـﺎ ﺘـﺫﻜﺭﺕ‬
  • 41. ‫ﻭﺤﺎﻭﻟﻨﺎ ﺇﻗﻨﺎﻋﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﻭﺃﺭﺍﺩﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺼﻠﻰ..‬ ‫ﺒﺘﺄﺠﻴل ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻭﻗﺕ ﺁﺨﺭ ﺘﻜﻭﻥ ﻓﻴﻪ ﺃﻜﺜـﺭ‬ ‫ﺭﻓﻀـﺕ ﺒﻌﻨـﺎﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﺴﺘﻌﺩﺍﺩﺍ ﻷﺩﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﺼـﻼﺓ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻋﺼﺒﻴﺔ.. ﻭﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﻓﻰ ﺍﺴـﺘﻁﺎﻋﺘﻬﺎ ﺒﺴـﺒﺏ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺩﺭ ﺍﻟﺠﻠﻭﺱ ﺒﺎﺘﺯﺍﻥ ﻭﺍﺘﺨﺎﺫ ﻭﻀﻊ ﺍﻻﺘﺠـﺎﻩ‬ ‫ﻟﻠﻘﺒﻠﺔ.. ﺼﻠﺕ ﻭﻫﻰ ﻨﺎﺌﻤﺔ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻅﻬﺭﻫﺎ ﻭﺒﺩﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﻀﻭﺀ.. ﻨﺴﻴﺕ ﺍﻟﻭﻀﻭﺀ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺨﻠﻁ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ ﺒﺴﺒﺏ ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺩﺭ.. ﺘﺒﺩﺃ ﻓﻰ ﻗﺭﺍﺀﺓ ﺍﻟﻔﺎﺘﺤﺔ‬ ‫ﻭﻋﻨﺩ ﻤﻨﺘﺼﻔﻬﺎ ﺘﻌﻭﺩ ﻟﺘﻘﺭﺃ ﺍﻟﻔﺎﺘﺤﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺠﺩﻴﺩ..‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺘﺨﻠﻁ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻘﺭﺍﺀﺓ ﻓﺘﺄﺘﻰ ﺍﻵﻴﺔ ﺃﺤﻴﺎﻨﺎ ﻤﺘﻘﺩﻤﺔ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻥ ﻤﻭﻀﻌﻬﺎ ﻭﺃﺤﻴﺎﻨﺎ ﻤﺘـﺄﺨﺭﺓ.. ﺍﺴـﺘﻐﺭﻗﺕ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺼﻼﺘﻬﺎ ﻭﻗﺘﺎ ﻁﻭﻴﻼ ﺠـﺩﺍ.. ﺼـﻠﺕ ﺨﻤـﺱ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺍﻨﺘﻬﺕ ﻤﻥ ﺼـﻼﺘﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺭﻜﻌﺎﺕ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﺭﺘﺴﻡ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﺍﺭﺘﻴﺎﺡ ﻋﻤﻴﻕ . . . .‬
  • 42. ‫- 61 -‬ ‫:ﺴﺎﻓﺭﺕ ﻤﻊ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻻﺴﺘﻘﺒﺎل "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ .."‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻭﺼﻠﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻤﺸـﺎﺭﻑ ﺍﻟﻘـﺎﻫﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﺎﻟﻀﻴﻕ..‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﻠﻡ ﺃﻥ ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﻨﻭﻉ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﻭﺭ ﻴﺤﻜﻡ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺃﺴﺎﻓﺭ ﺇﻟﻴﻬﺎ ﻻﺒﺩ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﻋﻼﻗﺘﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﺃﺼﺎﺏ ﺒﺎﻟﺼﺩﺍﻉ ﻭﺍﻟﻘﻰﺀ..‬ ‫ﺃﺸﻌﺭ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﺘﺴﺘﻘﺒﻠﻨﻰ ﺒﻭﺠـﻪ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﺎﺒﺱ ﻭﺼﺭﺍﺥ ﻻ ﻴﻨﺘﻬﻰ.. ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺃﺴﺘﻘﺒﻠﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺒﻘﻠﺏ ﻤﻨﻘﺒﺽ ﻭﺭﻏﺒﺔ ﺤﺎﺭﻗﺔ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻐﺎﺩﺭﺘﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺭﻉ ﻭﻗﺕ..‬ ‫ﻻ ﺃﻋﺭﻑ ﻴﺎ ﺃﺨﻰ ﻤﺎ ﺴﺭ ﻫـﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻨﻔـﻭﺭ‬ ‫..!!‬ ‫ﻫل ﻫﻭ ﺒﺴﺒﺏ ﻨﺸﺄﺘﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺃﺤﻀﺎﻥ ﻤﺩﻴﻨﺔ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﺩﻋﺔ ﻜﺎﻹﺴﻜﻨﺩﺭﻴﺔ.. ﺒﻌﻼﻗﺎﺘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻬﺎﺩﺌـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﺒﺤﺭﻫﺎ ﺍﻟﺴﻤﺢ.. ﺃﻡ ﻟﺸﻰﺀ ﺁﺨﺭ؟..‬ ‫ﺘﺸﻌﺭﻨﻰ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﺩﺍﺌﻤـﺎ ﺒـﺄﻨﻨﻰ ﻤﻬـﺩﺩ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻻﺒﺘﻼﻉ ﺃﻭ ﺍﻟﺘﻴﻪ.. ﻭﻴﺸﻌﺭﻨﻰ ﺘﺠﻬـﻡ ﻨﺎﺴـﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺤﻤﻭﻤﻴﻥ ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﻻ ﺴﺒﻴل ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﻹﻗﺎﻤﺔ ﻋﻼﻗـﺔ‬
  • 43. ‫ﺇﻨﺴﺎﻨﻴﺔ.. ﺒل ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻌﻜـﺱ ﺘﻤﺎﻤـﺎ.. ﻫﻨـﺎﻙ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺨﺸﻴﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺩﻫﺴـﻙ ﺍﻷﻗـﺩﺍﻡ ﺍﻟﻤﺤﻤﻭﻤـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺘﻌﺠﻠﺔ..‬ ‫ﺘﻀﺨﻤﺕ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺎﺱ.. ﻭﺍﻟﻜﺒﺎﺭﻯ..‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻷﻨﻔﺎﻕ.. ﻭﺍﻟﺴﻴﺎﺭﺍﺕ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺯﻭﺭ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸـﻔﻰ‬ ‫ﺭﺃﻴـﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﻯ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻌـﺎﻟﺞ ﻓﻴـﻪ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺎﺫﻭﺭﺍﺕ ﻭﺍﻟﻨﻔﺎﻴـﺎﺕ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺸـﺎﻁﺊ ﺍﻟﻨﻴـل‬ ‫ﻓﺘﺫﻜﺭﺕ ﺍﻟﺜﺩﻯ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺃﺭﻀﻌﻨﻰ ﻭﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ‬ ‫ﻴﻨﻬﺵ ﻓﻴﻪ..‬ ‫ﻭﺨﻁﺭ ﻓﻰ ﺫﻫﻨﻰ ﺴﺅﺍل ﻏﺭﻴـﺏ: ﻫـل‬ ‫ﺘﻌﺎﻨﻰ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ؟ ..!‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺒﻤﺭﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﻭﻗﺕ ﺘﺤـﻭل ﻫـﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺨـﺎﻁﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻴﺏ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻗﻨﺎﻋﺔ.. ﺜﻡ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺭﺜﺎﺀ..‬
  • 44. ‫:ﻻ ﺃﺨﻔﻰ ﻋﻠﻴﻙ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﻗـﻑ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﻻﺤﻅﺕ ﺃﻴﻀـﺎ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺼﺎﻟﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﻁﺎﺭ ﻤﺘﻭﺘﺭﺍ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻨﻅﺭﺕ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﺒﻰ ﻫﻭ ﺍﻵﺨﺭ ﻤﺘﻭﺘﺭ..‬ ‫ﺴﺎﻋﺔ ﻴﺩﻯ ﺘﺒﻴﻥ ﻟﻰ ﺃﻥ ﻤﻭﻋﺩ ﻁﺎﺌﺭﺓ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﺒﻌﺩ‬ ‫ﻨﺼﻑ ﺴﺎﻋﺔ ﺒﺎﻟﻀﺒﻁ.. ﻭﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ ﻗﺘل ﺍﻟﻭﻗـﺕ‬ ‫ﺒﺘﺨﻴل ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﻘﺘﺭﺏ ﻤﻥ ﻤﺼﺭ..‬ ‫ﻭﻗﻠﺕ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻔﺴﻰ ﻻﺒﺩ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻤﻀﻁﺭﺒﺔ ﻟﻠﻐﺎﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻨﺘﺯﻋﻨﻰ ﻤﻜﺒﺭ ﺍﻟﺼﻭﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺼﺎﻟﺔ ﺍﻻﺴـﺘﻘﺒﺎل‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺨﻭﺍﻁﺭﻯ.. ﺃﻋﻠﻥ ﻋﻥ ﻭﺼـﻭل ﻁـﺎﺌﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻟﻨﺩﻥ.. ﻻ ﺃﻋﺭﻑ ﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﺘﺴﺎﺭﻋﺕ ﺩﻗﺎﺕ ﻗﻠﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﺯﺩﺍﺩ ﺘﻭﺘﺭﻯ.. ﻭﺍﻟﺘﻔﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺃﺒـﻰ ﻓﻭﺠﺩﺘـﻪ‬ ‫ﻴﺤﺎﻭل ﺭﺴﻡ ﺍﺒﺘﺴﺎﻤﺔ ﻭﺍﺜﻘﺔ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻭﺠﻬﻪ ﻟﻡ ﺘﻨﺠﺢ‬ ‫ﺘﻤﺎﻤﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺇﺨﻔﺎﺀ ﺘﻭﺘﺭﻩ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻟﻤﺤﺘﻨﻰ "ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ "ﻋﺒـﺭ ﺤـﺎﺠﺯ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﺎﻟﺔ ﺍﻟﺠﻤﺭﻜﻴﺔ ﻟﻭﺤﺕ ﺒﻴـﺩﻫﺎ.. ﻭﺃﺸـﺎﺭﺕ‬ ‫ﻟـ"ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ "ﻭ"ﺃﺤﻤﺩ "ﻨﺎﺤﻴﺘﻨﺎ.. ﺘﻘﺎﻓﺯﺍ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﻟﻤﺤﺎﻨﺎ.. ﻭﻅﻼ ﻴﻠﻭﺤﺎﻥ ﺒﺄﻴﺩﻴﻬﻡ ﺍﻟﺼﻐﻴﺭﺓ..‬
  • 45. ‫ﻭﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺨﺭﺠﺕ ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ ﻤـﻥ ﺍﻟﺼـﺎﻟﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺠﻤﺭﻜﻴﺔ ﻻﺤﻅﺕ ﺃﻥ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻤﺼﻔﺭﺍ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﺤﺘﻀﻨﺕ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺃﺒﻰ ﻭﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ ﺒﺨﻭﻑ:‬ ‫ﻫل ﺴﺄﺭﻯ ﺃﻤﻰ؟‬ ‫ﻓﻘﺎل ﻟﻬﺎ ﺒﺜﻘﺔ:‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻙ ﺒﺨﻴﺭ .‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺭﻜﺒﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ ﺠﻠﺱ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﺠـﻭﺍﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴـﺎﺌﻕ.. ﻭﺠﻠﺴـﺕ ﻓـﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﻘﻌـﺩ ﺍﻟﺨﻠﻔـﻰ‬ ‫ﻭ"ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ "ﻋﻠﻰ ﺴﺎﻗﻰ.. ﺒﻴﻨﻤﺎ ﺍﺴﺘﻘﺭ "ﺃﺤﻤﺩ "‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺴﺎﻕ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ .."‬ ‫ﻫﻤﺴﺕ ﻟﻰ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ:‬ ‫ﺃﺭﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻀﻡ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺼﺩﺭﻯ .‬ ‫ﻓﻘﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ ﻤﺘﺭﺩﺩﺍ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻻ ﺩﺍﻋﻰ ﻻﺤﺘﻀﺎﻨﻬﺎ .‬ ‫ﺍﻨﻔﺠﺭﺕ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺒﻜـﺎﺀ.. ﻓﻤﺴـﺤﺕ‬ ‫ﺒﻴﺩﻯ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺭﺃﺴﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﺘﻤﺎﻟﻜﻰ ﺃﻋﺼﺎﺒﻙ .‬
  • 46. ‫ﻓﻘﺎﻟﺕ ﻟﻰ:‬ ‫ﺼﺩﺭﻯ ﻴﺄﻜﻠﻨﻰ .‬ ‫ﻭﻋﺎﺩﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺒﻜﺎﺀ ﻤﺭﺓ ﺜﺎﻨﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ:‬ ‫ﻜﻴﻑ ﻻ ﺃﺴـﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺤﺘﻀـﻥ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﺃﻀﻤﻬﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺼﺩﺭﻯ؟ ﻜﻴﻑ؟..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﻗﺩ ﻴﺅﻟﻤﻬﺎ ﺫﻟﻙ .‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻨﻰ:‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺨﻁﻴﺭﺓ.. ﺃﻟﻴﺱ ﻜﺫﻟﻙ؟‬ ‫ﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﻅﺎﻫﺭﺕ ﺒﻌﺩﻡ ﺴﻤﺎﻉ ﺴﺅﺍﻟﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻤﺩﺍﻋﺒﺔ "ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ .."ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﻋﺎﺩﺕ ﺘﻠـﺢ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺅﺍل..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﻟﻰ ﺒﻀﺭﺍﻋﺔ:‬ ‫ﺃﺭﺠـﻭﻙ.. ﺍﺤـﻙ ﻟـﻰ ﻜـل ﺸـﻰﺀ‬ ‫ِ ـ ـ ـ‬ ‫ـ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﺘﻔﺼﻴل..‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺎ ﻗﺩ ﺍﻗﺘﺭﺒﻨﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻁﺭﻴﻕ ﺍﻟﺼﺤﺭﺍﻭﻯ..‬ ‫ﻭﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﺘﻠﻔﻅﻨﺎ..‬
  • 47. ‫:ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﻟﻰ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﻨﻅﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻅﻼﻡ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺨﻼل ﺯﺠﺎﺝ ﺍﻟﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ:‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻋﺭﻀﻨﺎﻫﺎ‬ ‫ﻻ ﺃﺼﺩﻕ ﻤﺎ ﺤﺩﺙ..‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻓﻰ ﻟﻨﺩﻥ ﺃﻜﺩ ﻨﺠﺎﺡ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ..‬ ‫ﻜﻴﻑ ﻴﻤﻜﻥ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻌﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺒﻬﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻋﺔ؟‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺍﻟﻤﻌﺎﻟﺞ ﻫﻨﺎ ﺃﺒـﺩﻯ ﺍﺴـﺘﻐﺭﺍﺒﻪ‬ ‫ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺴﺭﻋﺔ ﺍﺭﺘﺩﺍﺩ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ:‬ ‫ﻭﻜﻴﻑ ﺴﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺒﻌﺩ ﻋﻭﺩﺘﻬـﺎ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﻟﻨﺩﻥ؟‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﻷﺴﺒﺎﺏ ﻁﺒﻴـﺔ ﺍﺴـﺘﺒﻌﺩﺕ ﺍﻟﺠﺭﺍﺤـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻹﺸﻌﺎﻋﻰ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ.. ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜـﻥ ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺒﺩﺍﻴـﺔ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺴﻭﻯ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ..‬ ‫ﻟﺩﺭﺠـﺔ ﺃﻨـﻪ ﺒﻌـﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﺘﺎﺌﺞ ﻤﺸﺠﻌﺔ ﻟﻠﻐﺎﻴﺔ..‬
  • 48. ‫ﺍﻟﺠﺭﻋﺔ ﺍﻟﺭﺍﺒﻌﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺘﻘﻠﺹ ﺤﺠﻡ ﺍﻟﻭﺭﻡ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﻓﺠﺄﺓ ﺒﺩﺃ ﺤﺠﻡ ﺍﻟﻭﺭﻡ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﺼﻑ..‬ ‫ﺍﻻﺯﺩﻴﺎﺩ ﻤﺭﺓ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ ﺭﻏﻡ ﺍﺴﺘﻤﺭﺍﺭ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻁﻌﺘﻨﻰ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ":‬ ‫ﻭﻤﺎ ﺘﻔﺴﻴﺭ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻟﻬﺫﻩ ﺍﻻﻨﺘﻜﺎﺴﺔ؟!‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ:‬ ‫- ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻗﺎل ﺃﻨـﻪ ﺭﺒﻤـﺎ ﺍﺴـﺘﻁﺎﻋﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺨﻼﻴﺎ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻨﻴﺔ ﻋﻤل ﺩﻓﺎﻉ ﻀﺩ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻨـﻭﻉ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ.. ﻟﺫﻟﻙ ﻗﺭﺭ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴـﺏ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﻗﻑ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺒﻬﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻨﻭﻉ ﻭﺍﻟﺒﺤﺙ ﻋﻥ ﺒﺩﻴل ﺁﺨﺭ‬ ‫.. ﻗﺎل ﺃﻨﻪ ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻴﺴﺘﺨﺩﻡ ﺍﻜﺜﺭ ﻤﻥ ﻨـﻭﻉ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ ﻟﺘﻼﻓﻰ ﺤـﺩﻭﺙ ﻫـﺫﺍ ﺍﻷﻤـﺭ‬ ‫ﺜﺎﻨﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻨﻰ ﺒﺴﺭﻋﺔ:‬ ‫ﻤﺘﻰ ﺴﻴﺒﺩﺃ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﺠﺩﻴﺩ؟..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ:‬ ‫ﺨﻼل ﺃﻴﺎﻡ . . . .‬
  • 49. ‫ﻭﺤﺎﻭل ﺃﺒﻰ ﺘﻐﻴﻴﺭ ﺍﺘﺠـﺎﻩ ﺍﻟﺤـﺩﻴﺙ..‬ ‫ﻭﺃﺴﺘﺩﺍﺭ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺨﻠﻑ ﻤﺨﺎﻁﺒﺎ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ":‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫-ﺍﻷﻭﻻﺩ ﻜﺒﺭﻭﺍ‬ ‫ﻓﺭﺩﺕ "ﺃﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺒﺂﻟﻴﺔ:‬ ‫ﺁﻩ.. ﻜﺒﺭﻭﺍ‬ ‫ﻭﺘﺒ ـﺎﺩل ﺃﺒ ـﻰ ﻤ ـﻊ ﻴﺎﺴ ـﻤﻴﻥ ﺤ ـﺩﻴﺜﺎ‬ ‫ـ ﹰ‬ ‫ـ‬ ‫ـ ـ‬ ‫ـ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻹﻨﺠﻠﻴﺯﻴﺔ.. ﻭﺃﺼﻠﺤﺕ ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ ﻟﺠﺩﻫﺎ ﻨﻁـﻕ‬ ‫ﺒﻌﺽ ﺍﻟﻜﻠﻤـﺎﺕ ﺍﻹﻨﺠﻠﻴﺯﻴـﺔ.. ﻓﻌﻠـﻕ ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﻀﺎﺤﻜﺎ.. ﻭﻤﺤﺎﻭﻻ ﺇﺨﻔﺎﺀ ﺠﻭ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺡ .‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻭﻻﺩ ﺃﺼﺒﺤﻭﺍ ﻜﺄﻭﻻﺩ ﺍﻹﻨﺠﻠﻴﺯ ..‬ ‫ﻓﺭﺩﺕ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻭﻫﻰ ﺴﺎﻫﻤﺔ:‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺎﺘﺫﺘﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ ﻤﺘﻔﻭﻗﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺩﺭﺍﺴﺘﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻴﺤﺒﻭﻨﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻕ ﺃﺒﻰ:‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﺸﺎﺀ ﺍﷲ ……‬ ‫ﻨﺎﻡ ﺍﻷﻭﻻﺩ.. ﻭﺠﻠﻠﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﺼﻤﺕ.. ﺘﺒﺎﺩﻟﺕ‬ ‫ﻤﻊ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻨﻅﺭﺍﺕ ﺨﺭﺴﺎﺀ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻨﻅﺭﺍﺘﻨﺎ‬
  • 50. ‫ﺘﻠﺘﻘﻰ ﺜﻡ ﺘﻬﺭﺏ ﺒﺴﺭﻋﺔ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻅﻼﻡ ﺍﻟﻤﺤﻴﻁ ﺒﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺨﻼل ﺯﺠﺎﺝ ﺍﻟﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﻫﻤﺴﺕ ﻟﻰ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ :"‬ ‫ﺃﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﺼﺩﺭﻯ ﻴﺄﻜﻠﻨﻰ ﻜﻠﻤﺎ ﺘﺼـﻭﺭﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻟﻥ ﺃﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺍﺤﺘﻀﺎﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﻋﺎﺩﺕ ﻟﻠﺒﻜﺎﺀ‬ ‫ﻓﻘﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺒﺭﻓﻕ:‬ ‫ﺇﺫﺍ ﺭﺃﺘﻙ ﺃﻤﻙ ﻤﻨﻬـﺎﺭﺓ ﻫﻜـﺫﺍ ﻓﺴـﻭﻑ‬ ‫…ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻗﺎل ﺇﻥ ﺍﻟﺤﺎﻟـﺔ‬ ‫ﺘﻔﺴﺩﻴﻥ ﻜل ﺸﻰﺀ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻔﺴﻴﺔ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺘﺄﺜﻴﺭ ﻜﺒﻴﺭ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻨﺠﺎﺡ ﺍﻟﻌـﻼﺝ..‬ ‫ﻨﺤﻥ ﻨﺘﻤﺎﺴﻙ ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻬﺎ ﻭﻻ ﻨﺸـﻌﺭﻫﺎ ﺒﺨﻁـﻭﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺤﺎﻟﺔ.. ﺇﺫﺍ ﺍﻨﻬﺎﺭﺕ ﻤﻌﻨﻭﻴﺎ ﻓﻼ ﺠـﺩﻭﻯ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ . . . .‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﺘﻔﺕ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺇﻟﻰ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻭﺴﺄﻟﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﻜﻴﻑ ﺤﺎل ﺯﻭﺠﻙ؟‬ ‫ﻓﺄﺠﺎﺒﺕ :‬ ‫ﺒﺨﻴﺭ.. ﺒﺨﻴﺭ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺍﺴﺘﺴﻠﻤﻨﺎ ﺠﻤﻴﻌﺎ ﻟﻠﺼﻤﺕ.. .. ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 51. ‫: ﻭﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻭﺼﻠﻨﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺒﻴﺕ ﻭﺠﺩﻨﺎ ﺼﻔﺎﺀ‬ ‫ﺘﻨﺘﻅﺭﻨﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺒﻠﻜﻭﻨﺔ.. ﻭﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ ﻗـﺩ‬ ‫ﺃﻴﻘﻅﺕ ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ ﻭﺃﺤﻤﺩ ﻋﻨﺩ ﻤﺩﺨل ﺍﻹﺴﻜﻨﺩﺭﻴﺔ‬ ‫ﻓﺼﻌﺩﺍ ﺍﻟﺴﻼﻟﻡ ﻭﻫﻤﺎ ﻴﺤﺩﺜﺎﻥ ﻀﺠﺔ ﻀـﺎﻋﻔﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺴﻜﻭﻥ ﺍﻟﻠﻴل.. ﺍﻨﺘﻬﺭﺘﻤﺎ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻭﺃﻤﺭﺘﻬﻤﺎ ﺒﻌـﺩﻡ‬ ‫ﺇﺤﺩﺍﺙ ﺃﺼﻭﺍﺕ..‬ ‫ﻭﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺩﺨﻠﺕ "ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ "ﺇﻟـﻰ ﺍﻟﺸـﻘﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﺤﺘﻀﻨﺕ ﺼﻔﺎﺀ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺒﺤﺙ ﺒﺒﺼـﺭﻫﺎ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﺭﺠﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﺸﻘﺔ.. ﻭﺴﺄﻟﺕ ﺃﺨﺘﻬﺎ ﺒﻠﻬﻔﺔ:‬ ‫ﺃﻴﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ؟‬ ‫ﻓﺄﺠﺎﺒﺘﻬﺎ "ﺼﻔﺎﺀ":‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﺘﺴﺘﻁﻊ ﺍﻟﺴﻬﺭ.. ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﻟـﻰ ﺃﻭﻗﻅﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﺼﻠﻴﻥ..‬ ‫ﻓﻘﺎﻟﺕ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ :"‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻭﻗﻅﻬﺎ ﺒﻨﻔﺴﻰ..‬
  • 52. ‫ﻭﻨﺒﻬﺕ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ ﻭﺃﺤﻤﺩ ﺒﺎﻟﺒﻘﺎﺀ‬ ‫ﻭﺘﻘـﺩﻤﺕ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻤﻜﺎﻨﻬﻤﺎ ﻭﻋﺩﻡ ﺇﺤﺩﺍﺙ ﻀﺠﺔ..‬ ‫ﺃﻀـﺎﺀﺕ ﻨـﻭﺭ‬ ‫ﻤﻊ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻏﺭﻓﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ.. ﻭﺍﻤﺘﺩﺕ ﻴﺩ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﺘﻬﺯ ﺠﺴـﺩ ﺃﻤﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺒﺭﻓﻕ.. ﺃﻀﻁﺭﺒﺕ ﺭﻤﻭﺵ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﺍﺒﺘﺴـﻤﺕ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﺕ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ.. ﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ ﺍﻟﻨﻬﻭﺽ.. ﺃﺒﻘﺘﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺍﻨﺤﻨـﺕ ﻋﻠﻴﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﺒﺤﺭﻜﺔ ﻤﻥ ﻴﺩﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﻭﻗﺒﻠﺘﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻟـ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ :"‬ ‫ﺨﺸﻴﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻤﻭﺕ ﺩﻭﻥ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺭﺍﻙ..‬ ‫ﻓﺭﺒﺘﺕ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻋﻠﻰ ﻅﻬﺭﻫﺎ:‬ ‫ﻟﻙ ﻁﻭل ﺍﻟﻌﻤﺭ ﻴﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﻭﺃﺒﺩﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺭﻏﺒﺘﻬﺎ ﻓـﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﻠـﻭﺱ..‬ ‫ﺴﺎﻋﺩﻨﺎﻫﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﻠﻭﺱ ﻭﻭﻀﻌﻨﺎ ﻤﺴﻨﺩﺍ ﻭﺭﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻅﻬﺭﻫﺎ.. ﻭﺴﻤﻌﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ ﻭﺃﺤﻤﺩ ﻴﻨﺎﺩﻴﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻴﻬﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺼﺎﻟﺔ.. ﻓﻀﺤﻜﺕ ﻭﻨﺎﺩﺕ ﻋﻠﻴﻬﻤﺎ..‬ ‫ﺠﺎﺀﺍ ﺒﺴﺭﻋﺔ.. ﺘﻘﺎﻓﺯﺍ ﺤﻭل ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻴﺭ.. ﻗـﺒﻼ‬ ‫ﺠﺩﺘﻬﻤﺎ.. ﻜﻨﺎ ﻗﺩ ﻨﺒﻬﻨﺎ ﻋﻠﻴﻬﻤﺎ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺍﺤﺘﻀﺎﻨﻬﺎ..‬
  • 53. ‫ﺃﺸﺎﺭﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻤﻭﻀـﻊ ﺍﻟـﻭﺭﻡ..‬ ‫ﻭﻜﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﻌﺘـﺫﺭ ﻋـﻥ ﻋـﺩﻡ ﻗـﺩﺭﺘﻬﺎ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﺤﺘﻀﺎﻨﻬﻡ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻟـ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺒﺄﺴﻰ:‬ ‫…‬ ‫ﺃﺭﺃﻴﺕ ﻴﺎ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ‬ ‫ِ‬ ‫ﻗﺒﻠﺘﻬﺎ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻭﻗﺎﻟﺕ:‬ ‫ﺴﺘﺸﻔﻴﻥ ﻴﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺇﻥ ﺸﺎﺀ ﺍﷲ …‬ ‫ﻓﺎﺒﺘﺴﻤﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺍﺒﺘﺴـﺎﻤﺔ ﻤﻭﺠﻌـﺔ ..‬ ‫ﺍﺒﺘﺴﺎﻤﺔ ﻏﺭﻴﺒﺔ ﻭﺘﻌﺒﻴﺭ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻭﺠـﻪ ﻴﺼـﻌﺏ‬ ‫ﻭﺼﻔﻪ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ ﻴﺴﺘﻘﺭ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻘﻠﺏ ﻜﺴﻜﻴﻥ ﺤـﺎﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺸﻔﺭﺓ.. ﻨﻔﺱ ﺍﻻﺒﺘﺴﺎﻤﺔ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻟﻡ ﺃﻨﺴﺎﻫﺎ ﻤﻨـﺫ‬ ‫ﺜﻤﺎﻨﻰ ﺴﻨﻭﺍﺕ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺍﻜﺘﺸـﻔﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻤـﺭﺽ ﻷﻭل‬ ‫ﺍﺒﺘﺴﻤﺕ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻻﺒﺘﺴﺎﻤﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺠﻌﺔ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﻤﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺎ ﻨﺤﺩﺜﻬﺎ ﻋﻥ ﺴﻬﻭﻟﺔ ﺍﻟﺸﻔﺎﺀ.. ﺍﺤﺘﺭﺕ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﻌﺎﻥ ﻜﺜﻴـﺭﺓ ﻟﻬـﺫﻩ ﺍﻻﺒﺘﺴـﺎﻤﺔ: ﺍﻻﺴﺘﺴـﻼﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻁﻠﻕ.. ﺍﻟﺘﺤﺫﻴﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺨﺩﺍﻉ.. ﺍﻟﺤـﺯﻥ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺒﻜﺎﺀ.. ﺍﻟﺭﻀﺎ ﺒﺎﻟﻘﻀﺎﺀ …‬
  • 54. ‫ﺘﺭﻜﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻤﻊ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻭﺨﺭﺠﺕ ﺇﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﺎﻟﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﺠﺩﺕ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻴﺠﻠﺱ ﺴﺎﻫﻤﺎ …‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻷﺒﻰ:‬ ‫"ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺠﺎﺀﺕ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻭﻋﺩﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﻓﻘﺎل ﺩﻭﻥ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻠﺘﻔﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ:‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺕ ﺃﻨﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺤـﺩﺩ ﻤﻭﻋـﺩ‬ ‫ﺃﻋﺭﻑ..‬ ‫ﺤﻀﻭﺭﻫﺎ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ:‬ ‫ﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﺘﻘﺼﺩ؟‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﻭﻗﺩ ﺍﻟﺘﻔﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ:‬ ‫-ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﺃﺸﻴﺎﺀ ﻟﻡ ﺃﻗﻠﻬﺎ ﻟﻜﻡ.. ﻟﻘﺩ ﺤﺩﺩﺕ‬ ‫ﻤﻭﻋﺩ ﺤﻀﻭﺭ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺒﻨﺎﺀ ﻋﻠﻰ‬ ‫ﺘﻘﺩﻴﺭﺍﺕ ﻁﺒﻴﺔ ﺩﻗﻴﻘﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻡ ﺃﺸﺎﺀ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺴﺎﻟﻪ ﻋﻥ ﺘﻠﻙ ﺍﻟﺘﻘـﺩﻴﺭﺍﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﺩﻗﻴﻘﺔ.. ﻜﻨﺕ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﻨﺤـﻭ ﻏـﺎﻤﺽ‬ ‫ﺃﺩﺭﺍﻙ ﻤﺎ ﻴﻤﻜﻥ ﺃﻥ ﻴﺨﺒﺭﻨﻰ ﺒﻪ..‬
  • 55. ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺠﺎﺀﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﺒﻌﺩ ﻓﺸل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﻴﺎﺌﻰ ﺒﺩﺍ ﻜل ﺸﻰ ﻭﺍﻀـﺤﺎ.. ﻟـﻡ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﻜﻥ ﻗﺎﺩﺭﺓ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺼﻌﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﺴﻼﻟﻡ.. ﺃﺤﻀﺭﻨﺎ ﻟﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﻜﺭﺴﻴﺎ.. ﺘﺼﻌﺩ ﺒﻀﻊ ﺴـﻠﻤﺎﺕ ﺜـﻡ ﺘﺠﻠـﺱ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻟﺘﺴﺘﺭﻴﺢ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺼﻔﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﺘﻌﻠﻭ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻴﻭﻤﻬﺎ ﺃﻴﻘﻨﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﻨﻬﺎﻴﺔ ﻭﺸﻴﻜﺔ …‬ ‫ﻴﻭﻤﻬﺎ ﺃﻏﻠﻘﺕ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﻨﻔﺴـﻰ ﺒـﺎﺏ‬ ‫ﻏﺭﻓﺘﻰ.. ﻭﺒﻜﻴﺕ ﺒﻜﺎﺀ ﻤﺭﺍ …‬ ‫‪ ‬ﹰ‬
  • 56. ‫- 02 -‬ ‫: ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤـﻭﺩ ﻤـﺎﺫﺍ ﻗﺎﻟـﺕ‬ ‫ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺃﺭﺩﺍﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺼﻑ ﺠﺩﺘﻬﺎ؟ …‬ ‫ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ ﻗﺎﻟﺕ:‬ ‫ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻤﺜل ﻗﻁﻌﺔ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ . . .‬ ‫ﻗﻁﻌﺔ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ ..!!‬ ‫ﺘﺼﻭﺭ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻭﺠﺩﺕ ﺘﺸﺒﻴﻪ ﻴﺎﺴﻤﻴﻥ ﺃﻜﺜﺭ‬ ‫ﺭﻭﻋﺔ ﻭﺒﻼﻏﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺃﻯ ﻭﺼﻑ ﻴﻤﻜﻥ ﺃﻥ ﻨﺼﻔﻪ‬ ‫ﻨﺤﻥ ﺍﻟﻜﺒﺎﺭ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻨﻴﺔ ﻫﻰ ﺃﺒﺭﺯ ﻤﺎ ﻴﻤﻴﺯ ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﺒﻴﺎﺽ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ.. ﻨﻌﻭﻤﺘﻪ.. ﻗﺩﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻻﻤﺘﺼﺎﺹ.. ﺤﻨﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﻴﻤﻜﻥ ﻭﺼﻑ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ ﺒﺎﻟﺤﻨﺎﻥ؟ ..!ﻻ‬ ‫ﺃﺩﺭﻯ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻨﻰ ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﻪ ﻫﻜﺫﺍ.. ﻫﺸﺎﺸـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ ﻭﺭﻗﺘﻪ.. ﺼﺩﻕ ﺍﻟﻘﻁﻥ.. ﺒﻴﺎﺽ ﺍﻟﻘﻁـﻥ‬ ‫ﻫـل ﺃﺩﺭﻜـﺕ ﻴﺎﺴـﻤﻴﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﺸﻌﺭﻙ ﺒﺎﻟﺼﺩﻕ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﻐﻴﺭﺓ ﻜل ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻤﻌﺎﻨﻰ؟ ..!‬
  • 57. ‫ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺤﻴل ﺃﻥ ﺘﻀﺒﻁ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﻤﺘﻠﺒﺴـﺔ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻜﺫﺏ.. ﺒﺒﺴﺎﻁﺔ ﻷﻨﻬﺎ ﻻ ﺘﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻜﺫﺏ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺤﺎﻭل ﺃﻥ ﺘﻘﻭل ﺸﻴﺌﺎ ﻤـﻥ ﻭﺭﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺒﻬﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﻴﺤﻤﺭ ﺒﺸﺩﺓ.. ﻭﺘﺘﻭﻗﻑ ﻋـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻜﻼﻡ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﻏـﺎﺭ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺎﺀ ..! !‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﻏﻀﺏ ﺒﺸﺩﺓ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻤﺎ ﺼﺩﺭ ﻤﻨﻬﺎ ﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﻴﻤﻜﻥ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻤﺱ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺎﺀ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻤﺘﻠﻙ ﻗﺩﺭﺓ ﻋﺒﻘﺭﻴﺔ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺇﻨﻜـﺎﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺫﺍﺕ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺅﺜﺭﻨﺎ ﺒﻜل ﺸﻰﺀ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﺘﺫﻜﺭ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜـﺎﻥ ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﻴﺭﻓﺽ ﺸﺭﺍﺀ ﺸﻰﺀ ﺃﻁﻠﺒﻪ ﺃﻴﺎﻡ ﺍﻟﺩﺭﺍﺴﺔ؟..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺨﺭﺝ ﺍﻟﻤﺒﻠﻎ ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺼﺹ ﻟﺸـﺭﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﻜﺴﻭﺘﻬﺎ ﻭﺘﻌﻁﻴﻪ ﻟـﻰ.. ﺍﻟﻤﺒﻠـﻎ ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺼـﺹ‬ ‫ﻟﻜﺴﻭﺘﻬﺎ ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ.. ﻜﺎﻥ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻤﺒﻠﻎ ﺃﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﻤﻥ ﻨﺼﻴﺒﻰ.. ﺃﻭ ﻤﻥ ﻨﺼﻴﺏ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﺃﻭ‬ ‫"ﺼﻔﺎﺀ .."ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﺃﺒﺩﺍ ﻤﻥ ﻨﺼﻴﺒﻬﺎ.. .‬
  • 58. ‫- 12 -‬ ‫: ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺩﺨﻠﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻤﺭﺤﻠـﺔ ﺍﻵﻻﻡ ﻟـﻡ‬ ‫ﺘﻜﻥ ﺘﺸﻜﻭ.. .. ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺭﺩﺩ ﺁﻴﺔ ﻗﺭﺁﻨﻴﺔ ﻭﺍﺤـﺩﺓ..‬ ‫ﻭﻜﺄﻥ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻵﻴﺔ ﻫـﻰ ﺒﻠﺴـﻤﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺸـﺎﻓﻰ.. ﺃﻭ‬ ‫ﻤﻼﻜﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺤﺎﺭﺱ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺭﺩﺩ:‬ ‫"- ﺭﺏ ﺇﻨﻰ ﻤﺴﻨﻰ ﺍﻟﻀﺭ ﻭﺃﻨﺕ ﺃﺭﺤﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺭﺍﺤﻤﻴﻥ … "‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﺘﺫﻜﺭ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻟﺴﺎﻥ ﻤﻥ ﻭﺭﺩ‬ ‫ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺩﻋﺎﺀ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻘﺭﺁﻥ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﺩﻋﺎﺀ ﺃﻴﻭﺏ..‬ ‫ﺘﺭﻯ ﻤـﺎ ﻫـﻰ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﻗـﺔ ﺒـﻴﻥ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﺃﻴﻭﺏ؟!..‬ ‫ﻫل ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺘﻤﺜل ﺃﻴﻭﺏ؟!..‬ ‫ﺍﻜﺘﺸﻔﺕ ﺃﻥ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻷﻴﻭﺒﻴﺔ ﻤﺘﺠـﺫﺭﺓ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻬﺎ..‬
  • 59. ‫ﺤﻴﺭﺘﻨﻰ ﻤﺴﺎﻟﺔ ﺇﻴﻤﺎﻨﻬﺎ.. ﻟﻭ ﻜﺎﻥ ﺍﻷﻴﻤﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﺒﻜﺜﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻌﻠﻡ ﻭﺍﻻﻁﻼﻉ ﻟﻤﺎ ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﺘﻀـﺎﺅل‬ ‫ﺇﻴﻤﺎﻨﻰ ﺒﺠﺎﻨﺏ ﺇﻴﻤﺎﻨﻬﺎ.. ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﻔﻬﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻴﻥ ﻭﺍﻷﻴﻤﺎﻥ ﺃﻋﻤﻕ ﻤﻨﻰ ﺭﻏﻡ ﻜﺜـﺭﺕ ﻤـﺎ‬ ‫ﻗﺭﺃﺕ ﻭﻋﻠﻤﺕ.. ﻫـﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺼـﺒﺭ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺍﻵﻻﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺒﺭﺤﺔ ﻭﻋﺩﻡ ﺍﻟﺘﺸﻜﻰ ﻻ ﻴﻤﻜﻥ ﺇﻻ ﺃﻥ ﻴﺴـﺘﻨﺩ‬ ‫ﺇﻟﻰ ﺇﻴﻤﺎﻥ ﺭﺍﺴﺦ.. ﺇﻴﻤﺎﻥ ﻓﻁﺭﻯ ﻋﻤﻴﻕ.. ﻟﻘﺩ‬ ‫ﺭﺃﻴﺕ ﺃﻨﺎﺱ ﻴﻔﻘﺩﻫﻡ ﺍﻷﻟﻡ ﺼـﻭﺍﺒﻬﻡ ﺇﻟـﻰ ﺤـﺩ‬ ‫ﻓﻤـﺎ ﺒﺎﻟـﻙ ﺒـﺎﻵﻻﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻻﻋﺘﺭﺍﺽ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﷲ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻨﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﺒﺭﺤﺔ.. ﻓﻘﻁ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﻴﺘﻘﻠﺹ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺘﺘﻠﻭﺍ ﺍﻟﺩﻋﺎﺀ: " ﺭﺏ ﺃﻨﻰ ﻤﺴﻨﻰ ﺍﻟﻀﺭ ﻭﺃﻨﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﺭﺤﻡ ﺍﻟﺭﺍﺤﻤﻴﻥ .."‬ ‫ﻭﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻴﺯﻭل ﺍﻷﻟﻡ ﻴﻌﻭﺩ ﺃﻟﻴﻬﺎ ﻭﺠﻬﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺒﺎﺴﻡ ﺒﻁﺒﻴﻌﺘﻪ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﻟﻰ ﻴﻭﻤﺎ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻴﺯﻭل ﺍﻷﻟﻡ.. ﻻ ﻴﻬﻤﻨﻰ ﺸﻰﺀ‬ ‫ﺘﻜﻠﻤﺕ ﻤـﻊ ﺃﺒـﻰ ﻓـﻰ ﻤﻭﻀـﻭﻉ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺴﻜﻨﺎﺕ..‬
  • 60. ‫ﻗﺎل ﻟﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ:‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺴﻜﻨﺎﺕ ﻻﺒﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺅﺨﺫ ﺒﺤﺴـﺎﺏ.. ﺇﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﻭﻗـﺕ ﻻ‬ ‫ﺒﺩﺃﻨﺎ ﺒﻤﺴﻜﻨﺎﺕ ﻗﻭﻴﺔ ﻓﺴﻴﺄﺘﻰ ﻋﻠﻴﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻨﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﻓﻴﻪ ﺘﺴﻜﻴﻥ ﺁﻻﻤﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﺸﺭﺡ ﻟﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺍﻟﺨﻁـﺔ ﺍﻟﺘـﻰ ﻭﻀـﻌﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻻﺸﺘﺭﺍﻙ ﻤﻊ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺍﻟﻤﻌﺎﻟﺞ.. ﻭﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺘﺒـﺩﺃ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻷﺴﺒﺭﻴﻥ ﻭﺘﺘﺩﺭﺝ ﺤﺘﻰ ﺘﺼل ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺭﻓﻴﻥ .‬ ‫...‬
  • 61. ‫- 22 -‬ ‫: ﻫل ﺃﻁﻠﺕ ﻋﻠﻴﻙ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ؟..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﺄﺨﺭ ﺒﻙ ﺍﻟﻭﻗﺕ؟ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﻤﻜﻥ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﻨﻜﻤل ﻏﺩﺍ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺤﺴﻨﺎ.. ﺤﺴﻨﺎ.. ﺴﺄﻜﻤل ﻁﺎﻟﻤﺎ ﺘﺭﻏـﺏ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺴﻤﺎﻋﻰ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻋﻠﻴﻨﺎ ﺃﻥ ﻨﺩﺨل ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸـﻔﻰ ﻤـﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﺃﺨﺭﻯ ﻟﺘﺄﺨﺫ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﺩﻴـﺩ..‬ ‫ﻗﺭﺭ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﺨﻠﻴﻁﺎ ﻤﻥ ﻋﺩﺓ ﺃﺩﻭﻴـﺔ‬ ‫ﻟﻤﻨﻊ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻤﻥ ﻋﻤل ﺩﻓﺎﻉ ﻜﻤﺎ ﺤﺩﺙ ﻤـﻊ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﺴﺎﺒﻕ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﻴﺩ ﺠﺩﺍ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ . . . .‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻨﺤﺎﺭﺒـﻪ ﻭﻴﺤﺎﺭﺒﻨـﺎ.. ﻨﺘﺤﺎﻴـل ﻋﻠﻴـﻪ‬ ‫ﻭﻴﺘﺤﺎﻴل ﻋﻠﻴﻨﺎ..‬ ‫ﻭﺤﺵ ﻤﺨﻴﻑ ﻤﺎﻜﺭ..‬ ‫ﺃﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﻪ ﻜﻭﺤﺵ ﺤﻘﻴﻘﻰ ﻭﻟﻴﺱ ﻤﻥ ﻗﺒﻴل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺒﺎﻟﻐﺔ ﺃﻭ ﺍﻟﺒﻼﻏﺔ.. ﻭﺃﻋﺘﺭﻑ ﻟﻙ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﺃﺨﺎﻑ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻀﺒﻁ ﻜﻤﺎ ﺃﺨﺎﻑ ﻤـﻥ ﺃﻯ ﺤﻴـﻭﺍﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﻨﻪ..‬
  • 62. ‫ﻤﺅﺫ.. ﺃﺤﻴﺎﻨﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻨﺘﺎﺒﻨﻰ ﻫﺎﺠﺱ ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﻴﻤﻜـﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﻴﺨﺭﺝ ﻤﻥ ﺠﺴﺩ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻭﻴﻠﺘﻬﻤﻨﻰ . . .‬ ‫ﺃﺭﺠﻭﻙ ﻻ ﺘﺒﺘﺴﻡ.. ﻓﺄﻨﺎ ﻻ ﺃﻤﺯﺡ..‬ ‫ﻻﺯﻟﺕ ﻤﺭﺘﻌﺏ ﻤﻨﻪ ﺤﺘـﻰ ﺃﻻﻥ.. ﻟﻘـﺩ‬ ‫ﺃﺼﺒﺢ ﻜﺎﺒﻭﺴﺎ ﻴﺘﻤﻠﻜﻨﻰ.. ﻤﻨﺫ ﻓﺘﺭﺓ ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﺃﻋﺎﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﻫﻭﺍﺠﺱ ﺍﻹﺼﺎﺒﺔ ﺒﻪ.. ﺒﺎﻟﺫﺍﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﻨﺠﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﺤﻠﻕ.. ﺃﻨﺎ ﺃﺩﺨﻥ ﻜﻤﺎ ﺘﻌﻠﻡ.. ﻋﻨـﺩ ﺍﻟﻔﺠـﺭ‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺘﻴﻘﻅ ﻓﺯﻋﺎ ﻭﺃﻋﺎﻨﻰ ﻤﻥ ﺼﻌﻭﺒﺔ ﺍﻟﺘـﻨﻔﺱ..‬ ‫ﺃﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﺤﻠﻘﻰ ﻤﺘﻀـﺨﻤﺎ ﻭﻤﺴـﺩﻭﺩﺍ ﺒـﺎﻟﻭﺭﻡ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻨﻰ.. ﺃﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﺎﻻﺨﺘﻨﺎﻕ ﻓﻌﻼ.. ﻭﺘـﺩﻭﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻨﻴﺎ ﺒﻰ.. ﻭﺃﺤﺎﻭل ﺠﺎﻫﺩﺍ ﺴﺤﺏ ﺍﻟﻬﻭﺍﺀ ﺇﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﺭﺌﺘﻰ.. ﺜﻡ ﺘﺫﻫﺏ ﺍﻷﺯﻤﺔ ﺒﻌﺩ ﻗﻠﻴـل.. ﻭﻟﻜـﻥ‬ ‫ﺸﻌﻭﺭﻯ ﺒﺎﻟﻭﺭﻡ ﻓﻰ ﺤﻠﻘﻰ ﻻ ﻴﻨﺘﻬﻰ.. ﺘﺘﻜـﺭﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺯﻤﺔ ﻴﻭﻤﻴﺎ.. ﺫﻫﺒﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴـﺏ ﻭﻁﻠـﺏ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻤل ﺃﺸﻌﺔ ﻤﻘﻁﻌﻴـﺔ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﻤﻨﻁﻘـﺔ ﺍﻟﺤﻠـﻕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺭﺃﻯ ﺍﻷﺸﻌﺔ ﺃﻜﺩ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﺤﻨﺠﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﺴﻠﻴﻡ ﺘﻤﺎﻤﺎ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻨـﻰ ﻻ ﺯﻟـﺕ ﺃﺸـﻌﺭ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻭﺭﻡ ﻴﺨﻨﻘﻨﻰ . . . . . . .‬
  • 63. ‫ﻴﺎﻩ.. ﺃﻨﺕ ﻟﻡ ﺘﺸﺭﺏ ﺍﻟﺸﺎﻯ.. ﻻﺒﺩ ﺃﻨﻪ‬ ‫ﺃﺼﺒﺢ ﻜﺎﻟﺜﻠﺞ.. ﺴﺄﺠﻌل ﺼﻔﺎﺀ ﺘﺼﻨﻊ ﻟﻨﺎ ﺸﺎﻯ‬ ‫ﺁﺨﺭ . . . .‬
  • 64. ‫- 32 -‬ ‫:-ﻓﻰ ﺃﻭل ﺃﻴﺎﻤﻨﺎ ﺒﺎﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸـﻔﻰ ﺘﻌﺭﻓـﺕ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ "ﺼﻼﺡ .. "ﻭﻓﻬﻤﺕ ﺃﻨﻪ ﺴﻴﺘﺎﺒﻊ‬ ‫ﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﻜﻭﻤﻰ.. ﻟﻘـﺩ‬ ‫ﺘﺤﻭﻟﺕ ﻋﻼﻗﺘﻨﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺼﺩﺍﻗﺔ.. ﺴـﺄﻋﺭﻓﻙ ﺒـﻪ‬ ‫ﺤﺘﻤﺎ.. ﻷﻭل ﻭﻫﻠﺔ ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻟﻥ ﻴﺯﻴﺩ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻅـﺭﻙ‬ ‫ﻓﻤﻅﻬﺭﻩ ﻴﺘﻨـﺎﻓﺭ ﻤـﻊ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﻜﻭﻨﻪ ﺘﻭﻤﺭﺠﻴﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻅﻬﺭ ﺍﻟﺘﻘﻠﻴﺩﻯ ﻟﻸﻁﺒـﺎﺀ.. ﻓﻌـﻼﻭﺓ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺴﺎﻁﺔ ﻤﻼﺒﺴﻪ ﻭﻋﺩﻡ ﺘﻨﺎﺴﻘﻬﺎ ﻭﺴﻤﺭﺘﻪ ﺍﻟﻐﺎﻤﻘﺔ‬ ‫ﻭﺸﻌﺭﻩ ﺍﻟﻤﻨﻜﻭﺵ.. ﻴﺘﻤﻴﺯ ﺒﺒﺴﺎﻁﺔ ﺸﺩﻴﺩﺓ ﻨﺎﺩﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻷﻁﺒﺎﺀ.. ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺯﺍﺭ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻷﻭل‬ ‫ﺍﺼﻁﺤﺒﺘﻪ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺨﺎﺭﺝ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ:‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﻴﻙ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﻴﺎ ﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ؟..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل:‬ ‫- ﺍﻟﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﻓﻰ ﻤﺭﺤﻠﺔ ﻤﺘﻘﺩﻤﺔ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺕ :‬ ‫ﻫل ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﺃﻤل؟..‬ ‫ﺃﺠﺎﺒﻨﻰ:‬
  • 65. ‫ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ ﻗﺩﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻷﻤل..‬ ‫ﻓﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ:‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﺭﻯ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟـﺫﻯ ﺘﺘﻠﻘـﺎﻩ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﻨﺎﺴﺒﹰ؟‬ ‫ﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﺠﺩﺘﻪ ﻴﻨﻅﺭ ﻟﻰ ﺒﺤﻴﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻪ ﻤﺸﺠﻌﺎ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫-ﻜﻥ ﺼﺭﻴﺤﺎ.. ﻻ ﺘﻘﻠﻕ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل :‬ ‫-ﻻ ﻴﻭﺠﺩ ﺤﺘﻰ ﺃﻻﻥ ﻋﻼﺝ ﻟﻠﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﺼﻌﻘﺘﻨﻰ ﺇﺠﺎﺒﺘﻪ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻠـﻙ‬ ‫ﺁﺨﺭ ﺃﺠﺎﺒﻪ ﺃﺘﻭﻗﻌﻬﺎ ﻤﻥ ﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻤﺘﺨﺼﺹ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﻋﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻪ ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﻤﺎ ﺯﻟﺕ ﺃﻋﺎﻨﻰ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺩﻫﺸﺔ :‬ ‫ﺇﺫ ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﻋﻼﺝ ﻓﻤﺎ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺘﻔﻌﻠﻭﻨﻪ‬ ‫ﻤﻊ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﻀﻰ؟ ..!ﻫل ﺘﺨﺩﻋﻭﻨﻬﻡ؟ !‬ ‫ﺃﺠﺎﺏ ﺒﺒﺴﺎﻁﺔ:‬ ‫-ﻜل ﻤﺎ ﻨﻔﻌﻠﻪ ﻫﻭ ﻤﺤﺎﻭﻻﺕ.. ﻤﺠـﺭﺩ‬ ‫ﻤﺤﺎﻭﻻﺕ..‬
  • 66. ‫ﺴﻜﺕ ﻗﻠﻴﻼ ﺜﻡ ﺃﻜﻤل:‬ ‫ﻋﻼﺝ ﺃﻯ ﻤﺭﺽ ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﺍﺒﺘﺩﺍﺀ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ‬ ‫ﺇﺫﺍ ﻟﻡ ﺘﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻌـﺭﻑ ﺃﺴـﺒﺎﺏ‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺒﺎﺒﻪ..‬ ‫ﺘﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻘـﻭﻡ ﺒﻌـﻼﺝ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺽ ﻓﻠﻥ‬ ‫ﺼﺤﻴﺢ.. ﻤﺎ ﻨﺴﻤﻴﻪ ﺍﻵﻥ ﻋﻼﺠـﺎ ﻫـﻭ ﻗﺘـل‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻟﻠﺨﻼﻴﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﻴﻀﺔ.. ﻭﻤﻊ ﻗﺘل ﺍﻟﺨﻼﻴﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﻴﻀﺔ‬ ‫ﻨﻘﺘل ﺨﻼﻴﺎ ﺃﻜﺜﺭ ﺴﻠﻴﻤﺔ ﻭﻨﻨﻬﻙ ﺍﻟﺠﺴﺩ ﻭﻨﻔﻘـﺩﻩ‬ ‫ﻨﺤﻥ ﻨﺘﺒـﻊ ﺃﺴـﻠﻭﺏ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺩﺭﺓ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﻘﺎﻭﻤﺔ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺩﻤﻴﺭ ﻻ ﺃﺴﻠﻭﺏ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﻫـﺫﺍ ﻫـﻭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺘﺎﺡ ﺍﻷﻥ.. ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ ﺍﻟﺤﻘﻴﻘﻰ ﻟﻠﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻴﺒـﺩﺃ‬ ‫ﺒﻤﻌﺭﻓﺔ ﺃﺴﺒﺎﺏ ﺤﺩﻭﺜﻪ ﻭﻜﻴﻔﻴﺔ ﺘﻜﻭﻨﻪ.. ﻻ ﺯﻟﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻨﺠﻬل ﺫﻟﻙ ﺤﺘﻰ ﺍﻷﻥ.. ﺜـﻡ ﻴﻜـﻭﻥ ﺍﻟﻌـﻼﺝ‬ ‫ﺒﺈﻋﺎﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﺨﻼﻴﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺼﺎﺒﺔ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺤﺎﻟﺘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﻌﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﺒﺩﺃ ﺫﻟﻙ ﺤﻠﻤﺎ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﻤﺎ ﺃﻜﺜﺭ ﺍﻷﺤـﻼﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺤﻘﻘﺘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺒﺸﺭﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻪ :‬ ‫- ﻟﻡ ﺃﺘﻭﻗﻊ ﻤﻨـﻙ ﻫـﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻘـﺩﺭ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﺭﺍﺤﺔ..‬
  • 67. ‫ﺃﺒﺘﺴﻡ ﻭﻗﺎل:‬ ‫ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﺃﻴﻀـﺎ ﻻ‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺕ ﻁﻠﺒﺕ ﺍﻟﺼﺭﺍﺤﺔ..‬ ‫ﺃﺤﺏ ﺍﻟﻜـﺫﺏ.. ﻻﺒـﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻨﻌـﺭﻑ ﺍﻟﺤﻘﻴﻘـﺔ‬ ‫ﻭﻨﻭﺍﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﻤﻬﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻤﺭﺍﺭﺘﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻪ:‬ ‫ﺃﺭﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻋﺭﻑ ﺍﻟﻤﺯﻴﺩ ﻋـﻥ ﺍﻟﻁـﺭﻕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺘﺒﻌﺔ ﻟﻤﺤﺎﺼﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﻟﻰ:‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻐﺩ ﺴﺄﻜﻭﻥ ﻨﻭﺒـﺎﺘﺠﻰ.. ﻭﺨـﻼل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻠﻴل ﺴﺘﻭﻥ ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﻓﺭﺼﺔ ﻟﻠﺤﺩﻴﺙ..‬
  • 68. ‫- 42 -‬ ‫:ﻓﻰ ﻨﻔﺱ ﻴﻭﻡ ﺩﺨﻭﻟﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺴﻤﻌﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻋﻥ ﺤﺎﺩﺜﺔ ﺍﻷﻗﺼﺭ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﻭﺼل ﺍﻟﺨﺒﺭ ﻋﻨﺩﻜﻡ؟..‬ ‫ﺃﻨـﺎﺱ ﻴﺤﺴـﺒﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﺘﺼﻭﺭ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ..‬ ‫ﺃﻨﻔﺴﻬﻡ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻹﺴﻼﻡ.. ﻴﻘﺘﻠـﻭﻥ ﺃﺒﺭﻴـﺎﺀ ﺒـﻼ‬ ‫ﺫﻨﺏ.. ﺴﻴﺎﺡ ﺃﺠﺎﻨﺏ ﺠﺎﺀﻭﺍ ﻟﻤﺸﺎﻫﺩﺓ ﺍﻵﺜﺎﺭ..‬ ‫ﺃﺘﻭﺍ ﻟﻴﻠﻘﻭﺍ ﺤﺘﻔﻬﻡ ﻓﻰ ﺒﻼﺩﻨﺎ..‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺃﻴﻥ ﺠﺎﺀ ﻜل ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻌﻨﻑ؟ ..!‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺃﻴﻥ ﺃﺘﻰ ﻁﻭﻓﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﻜﺭﺍﻫﻴﺔ؟!..‬ ‫ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻘﺴﻭﺓ ﻟﻴﺴﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻹﺴﻼﻡ.. ﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻟﻡ‬ ‫ﻴﺭﻭﺍ ﺍﻟﺤﺏ ﻭﺍﻟﺭﺤﻤﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻹﺴﻼﻡ؟ ..!‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺴﻤﻌﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﻬﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﺭ ﺤﺯﻨﺕ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻗﺎﻟﺕ؟..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ:‬ ‫ﺭﺒﻨﺎ ﻟﻡ ﻴﻘل ﺒﻬﺫﺍ.. ﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻓﻌل ﻟﻬﻡ ﻫﺅﻻﺀ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺠﺎﻨﺏ؟ ..!ﺃﻟﻴﺴﻭﺍ ﻀﻴﻭﻓﻨﺎ ﻭﺇﻜﺭﺍﻡ ﺍﻟﻀـﻴﻑ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﺠﺏ..‬
  • 69. ‫ﺃﻟﻴﺱ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺘﻁﺭﻑ ﺴﺭﻁﺎﻨﺎ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ؟..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﺭﻯ ﻤﺘﻰ ﺒﺩﺃ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ؟..‬ ‫ﻫل ﻨﺸﺄ ﻋﻥ ﻟﺤﻅـﺔ ﻀـﻌﻑ ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺎﻋـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﺎﺘﺠﺔ ﻋﻥ ﻫﺯﻴﻤﺔ ﻴﻭﻨﻴﺔ 76؟.. ﺃﻡ ﻨﺸﺄ ﻋـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻨﻬﻴﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﺤﻠﻡ ﺍﻟﻘﻭﻤﻰ؟..‬ ‫ﺃﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺃﻨﻪ ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜـﺎﻥ ﻀـﻴﺎﻉ ﺍﻟﺤﻠـﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﻭﻤﻰ ﻗﺩ ﺃﻨﺘﺞ ﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺁﺨﺭ.. ﻫل ﺴﻤﻌﺕ ﻴﺎ‬ ‫ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻋﻥ ﺇﺩﻤﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﻬﻴﺭﻭﻴﻥ ﻭﻋﺒﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﺸـﻴﻁﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﺸﺒﺎﺏ ﺒﻼ ﺤﻠﻡ ﻭﻻ ﻫﻭﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﺃﺼﺒﺤﺕ ﺃﺨﺎﻑ ﻤـﻥ ﺍﻟﺴـﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺒﻜـل‬ ‫ﺼﻭﺭﻩ ﻭﺘﺠﻠﻴﺎﺘﻪ..‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻨﻔﺱ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻡ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺃﺨﺒﺭﺘﻨﻰ ﺼﻔﺎﺀ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺇﻥ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻗﺩ ﺴﺎﻤﺤﺕ ﻋﻤﺘﻰ.. ﻭﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﺃﺨﺒﺭﺘﻬﺎ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻗﺩ ﺴﺎﻤﺤﺕ ﻋﻤﺘﻰ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺯﻤﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﺴﺎﻤﺤﺕ ﻜل ﻤﻥ ﺃﺴﺎﺀ ﺇﻟﻴﻬﺎ..‬
  • 70. ‫- 52 -‬ ‫:ﻗﺭﺭﻨﺎ ﺠﻤﻴﻌﺎ ﺃﻥ ﻨﻘﻴﻡ ﻤﻊ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ.. ﺃﺒﻰ ﻓﻘﻁ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﺒﻴﺕ ﺒﺎﻟﻤﻨﺯل..‬ ‫ﺍﻹﻗﺎﻤﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺴـﺘﺭﻫﻘﻪ‬ ‫ﺠﺩﺍ.. ﻜﺒﺭ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻭﻟﻡ ﻴﻌﺩ ﻴﺤﺘﻤل ﺍﻟﻤﺯﻴـﺩ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺘﻌﺏ..‬ ‫ﺭﺘﺒﻨﺎ ﺃﻤﺭ ﺍﻹﻗﺎﻤﺔ ﺒﺎﻻﺘﻔﺎﻕ ﻤﻊ ﻤﻤﺭﻀﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺭ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﺒﻌﺽ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻑ ﺍﻟﺨﺎﻟﻴﺔ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﺭﺠﺔ ﺍﻷﻭﻟﻰ.. ﻜﻨﺎ ﻨﻨـﺎﻡ ﻓﻴﻬـﺎ.. ﻋﻨـﺩﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﺍﻜﺘﺸﻔﺕ ﺇﺤـﺩﻯ ﺍﻟﻤﺸـﺭﻓﺎﺕ ﺍﻷﻤـﺭ ﺃﺜـﺎﺭﺕ‬ ‫ﻀﺠﺔ..‬ ‫ﺘﻜﻠﻡ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻤﻊ ﻤﺩﻴﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸـﻔﻰ ﻭﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﻌﺭﻓﻪ ﻤﻌﺭﻓﺔ ﺸﺨﺼﻴﺔ.. ﺴـﻤﺢ ﻟﻨـﺎ ﻤـﺩﻴﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﻭﻡ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻑ ﺍﻟﺨﺎﻟﻴﺔ ﺒﺎﻟﺩﺭﺠـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻭﻟﻰ ﺒﺸﺭﻁ ﺴﺭﻋﺔ ﺘﺭﻜﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺤﺠﺯﻫـﺎ‬ ‫ﻟﻤﺭﻴﺽ ﺤﺘﻰ ﻴﻤﻜﻥ ﺘﺭﺘﻴﺒﻬﺎ ﺒﺴﺭﻋﺔ ﻻﺴﺘﻘﺒﺎﻟﻪ..‬
  • 71. ‫ﻗﺴﻤﻨﺎ ﺃﻨﻔﺴﻨﺎ ﻟﻤﺭﺍﻓﻘﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ.. " ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻭ‬ ‫"ﺼﻔﺎﺀ "ﻟﺭﻓﻘﺔ ﺍﻟﻨﻬﺎﺭ.. ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﻟﺭﻓﻘﺔ ﺍﻟﻠﻴل ﺤﺘﻰ‬ ‫ﻁﻠﻭﻉ ﺍﻟﺼﺒﺎﺡ..‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻔﺘﺭﺓ ﻜﻨﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺇﺠﺎﺯﺓ ﻤﻔﺘﻭﺤـﺔ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻌﻤل.. ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﺍﻷﻤﺭ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﻟﻰ ﻤﺠـﺭﺩ‬ ‫ﺘﺄﺩﻴﺔ ﻟﻭﺍﺠﺒﻰ ﺍﻷﺨﻴﺭ ﻓﺤﺴـﺏ.. ﻟﻜﻨـﻪ ﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﺤﺎﻭﻟﺔ ﻹﻋﻁﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﻤﻌﻨﻰ ﺍﻷﺨﻴﺭ ﻟﻜل ﻤﺎ ﻗﺎﻤـﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﺘﺸﻌﺭ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻟﻡ ﺘﻜﻥ ﺘﺤﺭﺙ‬ ‫ﺒﻪ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻨﺤﻭﻨﺎ..‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺒﺤﺭ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻗﺩ ﺘﻌﻭﺩﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻌﻁﻰ ﻓﺤﺴﺏ ﻭﻟـﻡ‬ ‫ﺘﺘﻌﻭﺩ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻷﺨﺫ.. ﻜﺎﻥ ﺒﺩﺍﺨﻠﻬﺎ ﺸﻌﻭﺭ ﻋﻤﻴﻕ‬ ‫ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﻟﻴﺱ ﻤﻥ ﺤﻘﻬﺎ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺄﺨﺫ.. ﻋﻨـﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﻔﺎﺠـﺄ‬ ‫ﺒﺄﻨﻙ ﺘﻌﻁﻴﻬﺎ ﺸﻴﺌﺎ ﻤﻬﻤﺎ ﻜـﺎﻥ ﺒﺴـﻴﻁﺎ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺴﺎﻋﺘﻬﺎ ﺘﺸﻌﺭ ﺃﻨﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﺎﻟﺩﻫﺸﺔ ﻭﺍﻟﺨﺠل..‬ ‫ﺒﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﻭﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻌﻴﺩﻩ ﺇﻟﻴﻙ ﻟﺸﻌﻭﺭﻫﺎ ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﻟﻴﺱ ﻤﻥ‬ ‫ﺤﻘﻬﺎ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺄﺨﺫ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ ﻴﻭﻤﺎ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺇﺫﺍ ﺃﻨﺠﺒﺕ ﺒﻨﺘﺎ ﻓﺴﺄﺴﻤﻴﻬﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﺴﻤﻙ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 72. ‫ﻓﻨﻅﺭﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺒﺩﻫﺸﺔ ﻭﺍﻤﺘﻨـﺎﻥ ﻭﻜـﺄﻨﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﱠ‬ ‫ﻤﻨﺤﺘﻬﺎ ﺸﻴﺌﺎ ﻜﺒﻴﺭﺍ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 73. ‫- 62 -‬ ‫:ﺍﻟﻔﺘﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻁﻭﻴﻠﺔ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﻗﻀﺘﻬﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻨﺎﺌﻤﺔ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﻅﻬﺭﻫﺎ ﺃﻨﺘﺠﺕ ﺘﻘﺭﺤﺎﺕ ﺸﺩﻴﺩﺓ.. " ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "‬ ‫ﺸﺎﻫﺩﺕ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺘﻘﺭﺤﺎﺕ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻫﻰ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺘﻐﻴﺭ‬ ‫ﻷﻤﻰ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺍﻟﺠـﺭﻭﺡ ﻭﺘـﺭﻓﺽ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻔﻌـل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻤﺭﻀﺎﺕ ﺫﻟﻙ.. " ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ "ﺘﻌﻠﻤـﺕ ﻫـﺫﻩ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺸﻴﺎﺀ ﻓﻰ ﺇﻨﺠﻠﺘﺭﺍ ﻀﻤﻥ ﻤﻬﺎﺭﺍﺕ ﻭﻨﺸﺎﻁﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﺨﻴﺭﻴﺔ ﺸﺎﺭﻜﺕ ﻓﻴﻬﺎ ﻫﻨﺎﻙ..‬ ‫ﺃﺨﺒﺭﺘﻨﻰ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﺘﻘﺭﺤﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺠـﻭﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﺒﻅﻬﺭ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﺸﻌﺔ ﻭﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﺴﺒﺏ ﺁﻻﻤﹰ ﻻ ﺘﻁﺎﻕ..‬ ‫ﺎ‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻤﺎ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺃﻨﻘﺫ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻤﻥ ﻫـﺫﻩ‬ ‫ﺍﻵﻻﻡ؟..‬ ‫ﻭﺭﻡ ﺜﺎﻨﻭﻯ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻀﻐﻁ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻷﻋﺼﺎﺏ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﻌﻤﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﻔﻘﺭﻯ.. ﺴﺒﺏ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺸﻠﻼ ﻓﻰ ﻨﺼـﻔﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺴﻔل ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺠﻭﺩ ﺒﻪ ﺍﻟﺘﻘﺭﺤﺎﺕ ﻭﺠﻌل ﺍﻹﺤﺴﺎﺱ‬ ‫ﺒﻬﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺠﺯﺀ ﻤﻨﻌﺩﻤﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 74. ‫ﺒﺩﺃﻨﺎ ﻨﺒﺤﺙ ﻋﻥ ﻭﺴﻴﻠﺔ ﻨﺘﺤﺎﺸـﻰ ﺒﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺤﺩﻭﺙ ﺘﻠﻙ ﺍﻟﺘﻘﺭﺤﺎﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﺼﻑ ﺍﻷﻋﻠﻰ ﻤﻥ‬ ‫ﻅﻬﺭﻫﺎ ﻭﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻻﻴﺯﺍل ﺍﻹﺤﺴﺎﺱ ﻓﻴﻪ ﺴﻠﻴﻤﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﺭﻓﻨﺎ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﺤل ﻴﺘﻤﺜل ﻓﻰ ﺸﻰﺀ ﺍﺴﻤﻪ "ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺘﺒﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻬﻭﺍﺌﻴﺔ .."ﻓﻬﻤﻨﺎ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻀﺭﻭﺭﺓ ﻟﻠﻤﺭﻀﻰ ﺍﻟﺫﻴﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﻘﻀﻭﻥ ﻓﺘـﺭﺍﺕ ﻁﻭﻴﻠـﺔ ﻓـﻰ ﺍﻟﻨـﻭﻡ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﻅﻬﻭﺭﻫﻡ..‬ ‫ﺒﺤﺜﻨﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﻓﺎﻜﺘﺸـﻔﻨﺎ ﺃﻨـﻪ ﻻ‬ ‫ﻴﻭﺠﺩ ﺒﻬﺎ ﻤﺭﺘﺒﺔ ﻫﻭﺍﺌﻴﺔ ﻭﺍﺤﺩﺓ..‬ ‫ﺘﺼﻭﺭ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ..!!‬ ‫ﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺤﻜﻭﻤﻰ ﻜﺒﻴـﺭ ﻻ ﻴﻭﺠـﺩ ﺒـﻪ‬ ‫ﻤﺭﺘﺒﺔ ﻫﻭﺍﺌﻴﺔ ﻭﺍﺤﺩﺓ..‬ ‫ﺃﻴﻥ ﻨﺠﺩﻫﺎ ﺇﺫﻥ؟ ..!‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻬﻡ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺤﺎﻭل ﺍﻟﻌﺜﻭﺭ ﻋﻠﻴﻬﺎ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺃﻯ ﻤﻜﺎﻥ ﺨﺎﺭﺝ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ..‬
  • 75. ‫- 72 -‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻤﺴﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﺘﺎﻟﻰ ﻟﺩﺨﻭﻟﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ‬ ‫ﻗﺎﺒﻠﺕ ﺍﻟﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ ﺼﻼﺡ …ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻨﻭﺒﺔ ﺴﻬﺭﻩ..‬ ‫ﺠﺎﺀﻨﻰ ﺒﻌﺩ ﻤﻨﺘﺼﻑ ﺍﻟﻠﻴل.. ﺠﻠﺴﻨﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻔﺭﺍﻨﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻼﺼﻘﺔ ﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﻟﻠﻐﺭﻓﺔ ﻨﺎﻓـﺫﺓ ﺘﻁـل‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻔﺭﺍﻨﺩﺓ.. ﺠﻠﺴﻨﺎ ﺒﺎﻟﻘﺭﺏ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻨﺎﻓﺫﺓ ﺤﺘﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﺘﻤﻜﻥ ﻤﻥ ﻤﻼﺤﻅﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻤﻥ ﺨـﻼل ﺯﺠـﺎﺝ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﺎﻓﺫﺓ ﻭﺴﻤﺎﻉ ﺼﻭﺘﻬﺎ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻨﺎﺩﺕ ﻋﻠﻰ.. ﻋﻤﻠﺕ‬ ‫ﻟﻠﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ ﺼﻼﺡ ﺍﻟﺸﺎﻯ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺴﺨﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﻜﻬﺭﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺠﻭﺩ ﺒﺎﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ.. ﻜﻨﺕ ﻤﺴـﺘﺭﻴﺤﺎ ﻟﻭﺠـﻭﺩﻩ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻘﺭﺏ ﻤﻥ ﻏﺭﻓﺔ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﻓﺭﺒﻤـﺎ ﺘﺤﺘﺎﺠـﻪ..‬ ‫ﻭﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻁﻴل ﻓﺘﺭﺓ ﻭﺠﻭﺩﻩ ﻗﺭﺏ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ..‬ ‫ﺃﻴﻥ ﺘﻘﻊ ﻋﻴﺎﺩﺘﻙ؟‬ ‫ﺃﺠﺎﺏ:‬ ‫ﻟﻴﺱ ﻟﺩﻯ ﻋﻴﺎﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﺴﺘﻐﺭﺒﺕ ﺫﻟﻙ ﻭﻗﻠﺕ:‬ ‫ﺃﻋﺘﻘﺩ ﺃﻨﻙ ﻟﻴﺱ ﺤﺩﻴﺙ ﺍﻟﺘﺨﺭﺝ‬
  • 76. ‫ﻗﺎل:‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻔﻌل ﺃﻨﺎ ﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻗﺩﻴﻡ‬ ‫ﻤﺎﺯﺤﺘﻪ:‬ ‫ﻗل ﻟﻰ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺃﻨﻙ ﻟﻴﺱ ﻟﺩﻴﻙ ﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺒﺠﺩﻴﺔ:‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﺘﻤﺯﺝ.. ﻫﺫﻩ ﻫﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﻘﻴﻘﺔ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ ﺒﺎﻫﺘﻤﺎﻡ:‬ ‫ﻜﻴﻑ ﻴﺎ ﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ؟!‬ ‫ﺭﺩ ﻋﻠﻰ:‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻴﻨﺒﻐﻰ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻜـﻭﻥ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴـﺏ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻴﺎﺩﺓ ﻭﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ ﻭﻓﻴﻼ؟ …‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﺃﻋﺭﻑ ﺒﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﺃﺠﻴﺒﻪ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل:‬ ‫ﺇﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻁﺏ ﻨﺠﺩﺓ ﻗﺒل ﺃﻥ ﻴﻜﻭﻥ ﻤﻬﻨـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﻤل ﺒﺎﻟﻁﺏ ﻓﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺴـﺘﺤﻴل ﺃﻥ ﺘﻜـﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﺘﺎﺠﺭﺍ ﻭ ﺇﻨﺴﺎﻨﺎ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻔﺱ ﺍﻟﻭﻗﺕ.. ﺃﻨﺎ ﻤﺘﻔـﺭﻍ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻟﻬﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﻜﻭﻤﻰ ﺍﻟﻔﻘﻴﺭ .…‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ:‬
  • 77. ‫ﺃﻟﺴﺕ ﺤﺯﻴﻨﺎ ﻷﻨﻪ ﻟـﻴﺱ ﻟـﺩﻴﻙ ﻋﻴـﺎﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ ﻭﻓﻴﻼ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل:‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻹﻁﻼﻕ.. ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﻘﺘﻨﻊ ﺒﻤﺎ ﺘﻔﻌﻠـﻪ‬ ‫ﻻ ﺘﻨﺩﻡ..‬ ‫ﺴﻜﺕ ﺍﻟﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ ﺼﻼﺡ ﻗﻠﻴﻼ ﺜﻡ ﻗﺎل ﻟﻰ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺃﻨﻬﻡ‬ ‫ﺴﺄﺭﻭﻯ ﻟﻙ ﺸﻴﺌﺎ ﻏﺭﻴﺒﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﺩﻭﺍ ﻴﻀﺭﺒﻭﻨﻨﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺎﺒﺔ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ ﺒﺎﻫﺘﻤﺎﻡ:‬ ‫ﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ؟‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺒﺤﺯﻥ:‬ ‫ﻷﻨﻨﻰ ﻁﺎﻟﺒﺕ ﺒﻀﺭﻭﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻌﻤـل ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺯﻴﺎﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﻤﻘﺒﻭﻟﻴﻥ ﻓﻰ ﻜﻠﻴﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻁﺏ.. ﺍﺘﺠﺎﻩ ﺴﺎﺩﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺎﺒﺔ ﻫﻭ ﺘﻘﻠﻴل ﻋﺩﺩ ﺍﻟﻤﻘﺒﻭﻟﻴﻥ.. ﻫل ﺘﻌـﺭﻑ‬ ‫ﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ؟.. ﻟﺘﻜﻭﻥ ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﻨﺩﺭﺓ ﻓـﻰ ﺍﻷﻁﺒـﺎﺀ..‬ ‫ﻭﻨﺩﺭﺓ ﺍﻷﻁﺒﺎﺀ ﺘﻌﻨﻰ ﺃﻁﺒﺎﺀ ﺃﻏﻨﻴﺎﺀ …‬ ‫ﺼﻤﺕ ﻗﻠﻴﻼ ﺜﻡ ﻗﺎل:‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 78. ‫ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺃﻥ ﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﺍﻷﻁﺒﺎﺀ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺘﻌـﺩﺍﺩ‬ ‫ﺸﻌﺒﻨﺎ ﻀﺌﻴﻠﺔ ﺒﺩﺭﺠﺔ ﻤﺭﻭﻋﺔ.. ﻭﻫل ﺘﻌـﺭﻑ‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﺫﻟﻙ ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﺤﺭﻤﺎﻥ ﻗﻁﺎﻋـﺎﺕ ﻜﺒﻴـﺭﺓ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺭﻋﺎﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺔ.. ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﻋﺸﺭﺍﺕ ﺍﻵﻻﻑ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺭﻀﻰ ﻴﻤﻭﺘﻭﻥ ﻟﻨﻘﺹ ﺍﻟﺭﻋﺎﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴـﺔ..‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻁﺒﺎﺀ ﻴﺘﻜﺩﺴﻭﻥ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺩﻥ ﺍﻟﻜﺒﺭﻯ ﻓﻘـﻁ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺭﻯ ﻭﺍﻟﻤﺩﻥ ﺍﻟﺼﻐﻴﺭﺓ ﺘﻌـﺎﻨﻰ ﻤـﻥ ﻨﻘـﺹ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻁﺒﺎﺀ ﻭﺍﻟﻤﻌﺩﺍﺕ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺔ.. ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻴﺘﻡ‬ ‫ﺘﺨﺭﻴﺏ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻴﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﺤﻜﻭﻤﻴﺔ ﻟﺼﺎﻟﺢ ﺍﻟﻌﻴﺎﺩﺍﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻴﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﺨﺎﺼﺔ..‬ ‫ﺴﺎﺩ ﺍﻟﺼﻤﺕ ﺒﻴﻨﻨﺎ ﻭﻜﻨـﺕ ﺃﻓﻜـﺭ ﻓﻴﻤـﺎ‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﻪ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻪ ﻓﺠﺄﺓ:‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻌﺘﻘﺩ ﻴﺎ ﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﺴـﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻗـﺩ‬ ‫ﻭﺼل ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺅﺴﺴﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺔ؟!‬ ‫ﺃﺒﺘﺴﻡ ﻟﻰ ﺒﺤﺯﻥ..‬
  • 79. ‫- ٨٢ -‬ ‫: ﺘﺘﺫﻜﺭ ﺼﺩﻴﻘﻨﺎ ﺠﻤﺎل؟ …‬ ‫ﺠﻤﺎل ﺠﺎﺀ ﻟﺯﻴﺎﺭﺓ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ..‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﻠﻡ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻋﻤل ﺒﺎﻟﻤﺤﺎﻤﺎﺓ ﻓﻭﺭ ﺘﺨﺭﺠـﻪ..‬ ‫ﺠﻤﺎل ﺤﺩﺜﻨﻰ ﻋﻥ ﺃﺨﺭ ﺃﺨﺒﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺤﺎﻜﻡ.. ﺤﻜﻰ‬ ‫ﻟﻰ ﻋﻥ ﺃﺸﻴﺎﺀ ﻜﺜﻴﺭﺓ ﺘﺨـﺹ ﺍﻟﺼـﺭﺍﻉ ﺒـﻴﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺤﺎﻤﻴﻥ ﻭﺍﻟﺤﺭﺍﺱ ﺍﻟﺫﻴﻥ ﻋﻴﻨـﺘﻬﻡ ﺍﻟﻤﺤﻜﻤـﺔ‬ ‫ﻟﻸﺸﺭﺍﻑ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺎﺒـﺔ.. ﻭﺍﻟﺤـﺩﻴﺙ ﻋـﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﺤﺩﺜﻨﻰ ﻋـﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺎﻟﻔﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﺎﻟﻴﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺎﺒﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﻜﻴل ﻨﻴﺎﺒﺔ ﻀﺒﻁ ﻤﺘﻠﺒﺱ ﺒﺭﺸﻭﺓ.. ﻭﻋﻥ ﺩﺍﺌﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻗﻀﺎﺌﻴﺔ ﺒﺄﻜﻤﻠﻬﺎ ﺘﻡ ﺇﺤﺎﻟﺘﻬـﺎ ﻟﻠﻤﻌـﺎﺵ ﻟﻌـﺩﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺤﻴﺔ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻭﻀﻭﻉ ﺭﺸﻭﺓ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ …‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺸﺭﺩﺕ ﻁﻭﻴﻼ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺴﻤﺎﻉ ﻫـﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻜـﻼﻡ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺭﻏﻡ ﺃﻥ ﺒﻌﻀﻪ ﻟﻴﺱ ﺠﺩﻴﺩﺍ ﻟﻰ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﻨﻰ ﺠﻤﺎل:‬ ‫ﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﺃﻨﺕ ﺸﺎﺭﺩ؟ !..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻪ ﺒﺫﻫﻭل:‬ ‫ﻫل ﺃﺼﻴﺒﺕ ﺍﻟﻌﺩﺍﻟﺔ ﺒﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ؟..‬
  • 80. ‫ﻨﻅﺭ ﻟﻰ ﻭﻜﺄﻨﻪ ﻴﺭﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻴﺴﺄﻟﻨﻰ ﺃﻥ ﻜﻨﺕ‬ ‫ﻗﺩ ﺠﻨﻨﺕ …‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﻴﺴﺘﻁﻴﻊ ﺠﻤﺎل ﺃﻥ ﻴﻔﻬﻡ ﻤﺎ ﺃﻗﺼﺩﻩ …‬
  • 81. ‫- 92 -‬ ‫:-ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻟﺙ ﻟﺩﺨﻭﻟﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸـﻔﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺯﻟﻭﺍ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻟﻌﻤل ﺃﺸﻌﺔ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺠﺴﺩﻫﺎ ﻜﻠﻪ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﺨﻭﻓﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻨﺘﺸﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﺴـﺭﻁﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺃﻤﺎﻜﻥ ﺠﺩﻴﺩﺓ.. ﻅﻠﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻁﻴﻠﺔ ﺍﻟﺴـﻨﻭﺍﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺜﺎﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺎﺒﻘﺔ ﺘﻌﺎﻨﻰ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻹﺼﺎﺒﺔ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻭﻀـﻊ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﺤﺩ ﻴﺘﻡ ﺍﻻﺴﺘﺌﺼﺎل ﺜﻡ ﻴﻌﺎﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﻭﺭﻡ ﺒﻌﻨﺎﺩ ﺇﻟﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﺅﺨﺭﺍ ﺘﻡ ﺍﻜﺘﺸﺎﻑ ﻤﻭﻀـﻊ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺫﺍﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﻀﻊ..‬ ‫ﺠﺩﻴﺩ ﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺜﺎﻨﻭﻯ ﻴﻀﻐﻁ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻷﻋﺼـﺎﺏ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﻌﻤﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﻔﻘﺭﻯ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻹﺼﺎﺒﺔ ﺍﻷﺨﻴﺭﺓ ﺸـﻠﺕ‬ ‫ﻨﺼﻔﻬﺎ ﺍﻷﺴﻔل.. ﻭﻟﻡ ﺘﺴﺘﻁﻊ ﺍﺘﺨـﺎﺫ ﻭﻀـﻊ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺭﺍﺀﺓ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺼﺤﻑ ﻭﺃﺼﺒﺤﺕ ﺘﻁﻠﺏ ﻤﻨـﻰ‬ ‫ﻗﺭﺍﺀﺓ ﺍﻟﺴﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺘﺤﺒﻬﺎ "ﻴﺱ "ﻭ "ﺍﻟﺭﺤﻤﻥ "ﻭ‬ ‫"ﺍﻟﻤﻠﻙ "ﻭ "ﺍﻟﻭﺍﻗﻌﺔ "ﻭ "ﺍﻟﻤﻌﻭﺫﺘﻴﻥ "ﻭﺁﻴﺔ "‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻜﺭﺴﻰ .."ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﺴﻙ ﺒﺎﻟﻤﺼﺤﻑ ﻓﻰ ﻴﺩ..‬ ‫ﺒﻴﻨﻤﺎ ﺍﻟﻴﺩ ﺍﻷﺨﺭﻯ ﺘﻤﺘﺩ ﻟﺘﻤﺴﺢ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺭﺃﺴـﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺃﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﺘﻼﻭﺓ.. ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻅﻬﺭﺕ ﻨﺘـﺎﺌﺞ ﺍﻷﺸـﻌﺔ‬ ‫ﺃﺘﻀﺢ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻗﺩ ﺃﻨﺘﺸﺭ ﺒﺼﻭﺭﺓ ﻤﺭﻭﻋﺔ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺠﺴﺩﻫﺎ.. ﺍﺴﺘﻘﺒﻠﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﺭ ﺒﻭﺠﻭﻡ..‬
  • 82. ‫ﻗﺎل ﺃﺒﻰ ﻟﻠﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ ﺼﻼﺡ:‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﻴﻙ؟‬ ‫ﻓﺄﺠﺎﺒﻪ ﺍﻟﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ..‬ ‫ﻟﻘﺩ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺒﺎﻟﻔﻌل ﺍﺴـﺘﻌﺩ ﻟﺒـﺩﺀ ﺍﻟﻌـﻼﺝ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻜﻴﻤﺎﺌﻰ.. ﺍﻟﻭﻀﻊ ﺍﻵﻥ ﺃﺨﺘﻠﻑ.. ﺃﻋﺘﻘﺩ ﺃﻨـﻪ‬ ‫ﻓﺎﻟﻭﺭﻡ ﻗﺩ ﺍﻨﺘﺸﺭ‬ ‫ﻻ ﺠﺩﻭﻯ ﺍﻵﻥ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻌﻼﺝ..‬ ‫ﺒﺼﻭﺭﺓ ﺘﺠﻌل ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺤﻴل ﻤﺤﺎﺼﺭﺘﻪ..‬
  • 83. ‫- 03 -‬ ‫:ﺃﺼﺒﺢ ﻫﺎﺠﺱ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﻴﺴـﻴﻁﺭ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺘﻔﻜﻴﺭﻨﺎ.. .‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻤﻨﺎﺴﺒﺔ ﺴﺄﺭﻭﻯ ﻟﻙ ﻭﺍﻗﻌﺔ ﻏﺭﻴﺒﺔ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻟﺸﻘﻴﻘﺘﻰ ﺼﻔﺎﺀ ﺼـﺩﻴﻘﺔ ﺘـﺩﻋﻰ‬ ‫ﻤﻨﻰ.. ﻭﺍﻟﺩﺓ ﻤﻨﻰ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﺎﻨﻰ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ..‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺫﻟﻙ.. ﻭﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ ﺘﺴـﺎل‬ ‫ﻋﻥ ﺼﺤﺔ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﺓ ﻤﻨﻰ ﺭﻏﻡ ﺃﻨﻬـﺎ ﻻ ﺘﻌﺭﻓﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻡ ﺘﻨﻘﻁﻊ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺅﺍل ﻋـﻥ‬ ‫ﺸﺨﺼﻴﺎ..‬ ‫ﺼﺤﺔ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﺓ ﻤﻨﻰ ﻭﻋﻠﻰ ﻓﺘـﺭﺍﺕ ﻤﺘﻘﺎﺭﺒـﺔ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺸﻰﺀ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻴﺏ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺍﻨﻘﻁﻌﺕ ﻓﺠﺄﺓ ﻋﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺅﺍل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻴﺏ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﺓ ﻤﻨﻰ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﻭﻓﺕ..‬ ‫ﻟﻘـﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻤﺭ ﺃﻨﻨﺎ ﻟﻡ ﻨﺨﺒﺭﻫﺎ ﺒﻭﻓﺎﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﺓ ﻤﻨﻰ..‬ ‫ﻀﺭﺒﻨﺎ ﺴﺘﺎﺭﺍ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻴﺔ ﺤﻭل ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﺭ..‬ ‫ﻟﺩﺭﺠﺔ ﺃﻥ ﻤﻨﻰ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺠـﺎﺀﺕ ﻟﺘـﺯﻭﺭ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﺨﻠﻌﺕ ﻤﻼﺒﺴﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺴﻭﺩﺍﺀ ﺘﻘﺩﻴﺭ ﻟﻠﻤﻭﻗﻑ ﻭﻟﺒﺴﺕ‬ ‫ﺜﻴﺎﺒﺎ ﻤﻠﻭﻨﻪ ﻭﻟﻡ ﻴﻅﻬﺭ ﻤﻨﻬﺎ ﺃﻯ ﺸـﻰﺀ ﻴـﻭﺤﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﻟﻡ ﺘﺴﺄﻟﻬﺎ ﻋﻥ ﺼﺤﺔ ﺃﻤﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺒﻭﻓﺎﺓ ﺃﻤﻬﺎ..‬ ‫…‬
  • 84. ‫ﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺼﻤﺕ؟!..‬ ‫ﻫل ﻋﻠﻤﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﻭﻓﺎﺓ ﻭﺍﻟـﺩﺓ ﻤﻨـﻰ؟ ..!‬ ‫ﻭﻜﻴﻑ ﻋﻠﻤﺕ؟ ..!‬ ‫ﻟﻘﺩ ﻜﻨﺕ ﻤﺘﺄﻜﺩﺍ ﻤﻥ ﻋﺩﻡ ﺘﺴﺭﺏ ﺍﻟﺨﺒﺭ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫.‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻜﺜﺭ ﻏﺭﺍﺒﻪ ﺃﻥ ﻤﻨﻰ ﺃﻗﺴﻤﺕ ﻷﺨﺘـﻰ‬ ‫ﺼﻔﺎﺀ ﺃﻥ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﺘﻬﺎ ﻨﺎﺩﺕ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﺒﺎﺴـﻤﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺤﺘﻀﺭ.. ﺃﻗﺴﻤﺕ ﻤﻨﻰ ﻷﺨﺘﻰ ﺼﻔﺎﺀ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﺩﺘﻬﺎ ﻟﻡ ﺘﻜﻥ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﺍﺴـﻡ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﻭﺃﻨﻬـﺎ ﻻ‬ ‫ﺘﻌﺭﻓﻬﺎ ﺴﻭﻯ ﺒﺎﺴﻡ "ﺃﻡ ﺼﻔﺎﺀ .… "‬
  • 85. ‫- 13 -‬ ‫ﺃﺭﻗﻨـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﻏﺎﺒﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻷﺴـﺭﺍﺭ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻔﻜﻴﺭ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﻭﺃﺴﺭﺍﺭﻩ..‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﻤﻌﻨﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ؟.. ﻭﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻨﻤﻭﺕ؟..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﻤﺠﺭﺩ ﻤﻌﺒﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﺍﻟﻔﺎﻨﻴﺔ‬ ‫ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﺍﻟﺒﺎﻗﻴﺔ؟!..‬ ‫ﻻ ﺃﻅﻥ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﺒﻬـﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺒﺴـﺎﻁﺔ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﻨﻔﺴﻬﺎ ﻟﻐﺯ.. ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﻟﻡ ﻴﺘﻭﻗﻔـﺎ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺇﺩﻫﺎﺸﻨﺎ ﺭﻏﻡ ﻜﻭﻨﻬﻤﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻷﺤﺩﺍﺙ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻤﻴﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺘﻜﺭﺭﺓ ﻋﺒﺭ ﺃﺯﻤﺎﻥ ﺴﺤﻴﻘﺔ..‬ ‫ﺤﺩﺜﻨﻰ ﺃﺤﺩ ﺍﻷﺼـﺩﻗﺎﺀ ﻋـﻥ ﺘﺠﺭﺒـﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﺴﺘﻘﺒﺎﻟﻪ ﻟﻤﻭﻟﻭﺩﻩ ﺍﻷﻭل.. ﻗﺎل ﻟﻰ ﺃﻨـﻪ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺭﻏﻡ ﻤﻥ ﻜﺜﺭﺓ ﺍﻷﻁﻔﺎل ﺍﻟﺫﻴﻥ ﺭﺁﻫﻡ ﻴﻭﻟـﺩﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﺇﻻ ﺃﻨﻪ ﺍﻨﺩﻫﺵ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﻯ ﺍﺒﻨﻪ ﺍﻷﻭل.. ﺩﻫﺵ‬ ‫ﻭﻜﺄﻨﻪ ﻴﺭﻯ ﻟﻠﻤﺭﺓ ﺍﻷﻭﻟﻰ ﻁﻔﻼ ﻴﻭﻟﺩ.. ﻭﺃﺨـﺫ‬ ‫ﻴﻔﻜﺭ ﻜﻴﻑ ﺃﺼﺒﺢ ﺴﺎﺌﻠﻪ ﺍﻟﻤﻨﻭﻯ ﺍﻟﻤﻘﺯﺯ ﺃﻨﺴﺎﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻟﻪ ﺤﻴﺎﺓ.. ﺃﻜﺩ ﻟﻰ ﺃﻨﻪ ﺴـﻬﺭ ﺤﻨـﻰ ﺍﻟﺼـﺒﺎﺡ‬ ‫ﻴﺤﻤﻠﻕ ﻓﻴﻪ ﺒﺩﻫﺸﺔ..‬
  • 86. ‫ﻻﺯﺍﻟﺕ ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﺘﺩﻫﺸﻨﺎ ﻜﺎﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﺘﻤﺎﻤﺎ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ ﺼﻼﺡ ﻟﻪ ﺭﺃﻯ ﻏﺭﻴـﺏ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﻴﺭﻯ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﻫـﻭ ﺍﻟـﺫﻯ‬ ‫ﻤﺴﺄﻟﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ..‬ ‫ﻴﺤﻤﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ.. ﻜﻴﻑ؟ ..!ﻴﻘـﻭل‬ ‫ﺃﻨﻪ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻟﻡ ﻴﻤﺕ ﺍﻟﻨﺎﺱ ﻓﺈﻥ ﺘﻜﺎﺜﺭﻫﻡ ﺍﻟﻼﻨﻬـﺎﺌﻰ‬ ‫ﺴﻴﺼﺒﺢ ﺒﺎﻟﻀﺒﻁ ﻤﺜل ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ.. ﻭﺴﻴﻠﺘﻬﻤﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﻜل ﻤﺼﺎﺩﺭ ﺍﻟﻁﺎﻗﺔ ﻭﺍﻟﻐﺫﺍﺀ ﻭﺴﺘﺨﺘﻔﻰ ﺘﺩﺭﻴﺠﻴﺎ‬ ‫ﻤﻅﺎﻫﺭ ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﺤﻀﺎﺭﺓ.. ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺇﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﺃﻥ ﻴﺄﻜل ﺍﻟﺒﺸﺭ ﺒﻌﻀﻬﻡ ﻟﻨﻔﺎﺩ ﺍﻟﻐﺫﺍﺀ ﺃﻭ ﻴﻤﻭﺘﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﺠﻭﻋﺎ.. ﻭﻓﻰ ﻜل ﺍﻷﺤﻭﺍل ﺴﻴﺤﺩﺙ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻹﺠﺒﺎﺭﻯ ﻟﻠﺠﻨﺱ ﺍﻟﺒﺸﺭﻯ ﻭﻟﻜـﻥ ﻤـﺎ ﻴﻘﻭﻟـﻪ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ ﺼﻼﺡ ﻻ ﻴﺤل ﻜل ﺃﻟﻐﺎﺯ ﺍﻟﻤـﻭﺕ ﻭﻻ‬ ‫ﻴﻜﺸﻑ ﺃﺴﺭﺍﺭﻩ..‬
  • 87. ‫- 23 -‬ ‫-ﺤﻠﻤﺕ ﺤﻠﻤﺎ ﻋﺠﻴﺒـﺎ ﺃﺜﻨـﺎﺀ ﻭﺠﻭﺩﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ .…‬ ‫ﺭﺃﻴﺕ ﻨﻔﺴﻰ ﻤﻜﺎﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺴـﺭﻴﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ.. ﻭﻤﺼﺎﺏ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺒﺫﺍﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺽ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﺭﻏﻡ ﺍﻻﺒﺘﺴﺎﻤﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﻜﺎﻨﻭﺍ ﺠﻤﻴﻌﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺤﻭﻟﻰ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﻋﺒﺎﺭﺍﺕ ﺍﻟﺘﺸﺠﻴﻊ ﺍﻟﺤﺎﺭﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﻤﻁﻤﺌﻨﺔ ﻓﻘﺩ ﺃﻟﻘﺕ‬ ‫ﻨﻅﺭﺍﺘﻬﻡ ﺍﻟﻘﻠﻘﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﺘﺒﺎﺩﻟﺔ ﺒﻅﻼل ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺸﻙ ﺤﻭل‬ ‫ﺼﺤﺔ ﻤﺎ ﻴﻘﻭﻟﻭﻥ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻰ ﻜﻨﺕ ﻗﺩ ﺍﺴـﺘﻁﻌﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻭﺼﻭل ﺇﻟﻰ ﻨﻭﻉ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﻼﻡ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﺴﻰ ﻭﺍﻟﺭﻀﺎ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﺸﻰﺀ ﻏﺭﻴﺏ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻤﺼﻴﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺤﺘﻭﻡ..‬ ‫ﻴﺤﺩﺙ ﻟﻰ:‬ ‫ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﻭﺯﻨﻰ ﻴﺨﻑ ﺘﺩﺭﻴﺠﻴﺎ ﺜﻡ ﺃﻁﻔـﻭ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻭﻕ ﺍﻟﻬﻭﺍﺀ ﻭﺃﺭﺘﻔﻊ ﺸﻴﺌﺎ ﻓﺸﻴﺌﺎ.. ﺜـﻡ ﻫـﺎﻟﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺸﻬﺩ ﺍﻟﺘﺎﻟﻰ:‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺃﻋﻠﻰ ﺃﺭﺍﻨﻰ ﺭﺍﻗﺩ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺴـﺭﻴﺭ..‬ ‫ﺒﻴﻨﻤﺎ ﺘﺴﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ ﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻔﻭﻀﻰ.. ﺃﻫﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻷﻁﺒﺎﺀ ﻭﺍﻟﻤﻤﺭﻀﺎﺕ ﻓـﻰ ﺤﺎﻟـﺔ‬ ‫ﻴﺒﻜﻭﻥ..‬ ‫ﻓﺯﻉ.. ﺜﻡ ﻤﺤﺎﻭﻻﺕ ﻤﺴﺘﻤﻴﺘﺔ ﻹﻨﻘﺎﺫﻯ.. ﺜـﻡ‬
  • 88. ‫ﻴﻬﺯ ﻜﺒﻴﺭ ﺍﻷﻁﺒﺎﺀ ﺭﺃﺴﻪ ﺒﻤﺎ ﻴﻌﻨﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻬﺎﻴـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﻭﻗﻔﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻨﺩﻫﺸﺕ ﻭﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ ﺘﻨﺒﻴﻬﻬﻡ ﻟﻭﺠﻭﺩﻯ..‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻬﻡ ﻓﺎﻜﺘﺸﻔﺕ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻻ ﻴﺭﻭﻨﻨﻰ ..‬ ‫ﻫﺯ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺒﻴﺩﻯ ﻓﺘﺒﻴﻥ ﻟﻰ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻟـﻴﺱ ﺠﺴـﺩ‬ ‫ﻤﺎﺩﻯ.. ﺜﻡ ﺼﺭﺨﺕ ﻓﻠﻡ ﻴﺼﺩﺭ ﻤﻨﻰ ﺼـﻭﺕ‬ ‫…ﺜﻡ ﺭﺃﻴﺘﻬﻡ ﺠﻤﻴﻌﺎ ﻴﻐﺎﺩﺭﻭﻥ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻤﺴﻤﻭﻉ‬ ‫ﺇﻻ ﻤﻤﺭﻀﺔ ﻻ ﺃﺩﺭﻯ ﺴﺒﺏ ﻭﺠﻭﺩﻫﺎ.. ﻭﺃﻟﻘﻴﺕ‬ ‫ﻨﻅﺭﺓ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺠﺴﺩﻯ ﺍﻟﻤﺴـﺠﻰ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺍﻟﺴـﺭﻴﺭ‬ ‫ﻓﺭﺃﻴﺘﻪ ﻓﻅﻴﻌﺎ ﺒﻜﺜﺭﺓ ﺍﻷﻨﺎﺒﻴﺏ ﺒﺎﻟﻤﻭﻀﻭﻋﺔ ﺒﻔﻤﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﺃﻨﻔﻰ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻫﺸﺔ ﺜﻡ ﺍﻟﻔﺯﻉ ﻫﻭ ﺃﻭل ﻤﺎ ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﻪ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻭﻀﻌﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﺩﻴﺩ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻴﺏ.. ﺜﻡ ﺴﺭﻋﺎﻥ ﻤـﺎ‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺘﻭﻟﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺸﻌﻭﺭ ﻁـﺎﻍ ﺒـﺎﻟﻔﺭﺡ ﻋﻨـﺩﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﺍﻜﺘﺸﻔﺕ ﻗﺩﺭﺘﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻁﻴﺭﺍﻥ ﺒﻤﺠﺭﺩ ﺍﻟﺭﻏﺒـﺔ‬ ‫ﻭﺒﻼ ﻤﺠﻬﻭﺩ ﻴﺫﻜﺭ …ﻭﺘﺫﻜﺭﺕ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻜﺜﻴﺭﺍ ﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻨﺘﺎﺒﺘﻨﻰ ﺃﺤﻼﻡ ﺍﻟﻁﻴﺭﺍﻥ ﺒﺎﻟﻘﺩﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﺫﺍﺘﻴـﺔ ﻀـﺩ‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻨﻭﻥ ﺍﻟﺠﺎﺫﺒﻴﺔ ﺍﻷﺭﻀﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻴﻨﻌـﺩﻡ ﺘـﺄﺜﻴﺭﻩ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﻭﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﺸﻐﻠﺕ ﻜﺜﻴﺭﺍ ﺒﻤﺤﺎﻭﻟﺔ ﺘﻔﺴﻴﺭ ﻤﻌﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 89. ‫ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻁﻴﺭﺍﻥ …ﺜﻡ ﺍﻜﺘﺸـﻔﺕ ﻗـﺩﺭﺓ ﺃﺨـﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﺘﺨﺹ ﻭﻀﻌﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﺩﻴﺩ …ﺘﻤﺜﻠﺕ ﻓﻰ ﻤﻘـﺩﺭﺘﻰ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺭﺅﻴﺔ ﺨﻠﻑ ﺍﻟﺠﺩﺭﺍﻥ ﻭﺴﻤﺎﻉ ﺍﻷﺤﺎﺩﻴـﺙ‬ ‫ﻋﺒﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺎﻓﺎﺕ ﻭﺍﻟﻌﻭﺍﺌﻕ ﺒﻤﺠﺭﺩ ﺍﻟﺭﻏﺒﺔ .. ﻟﻘﺩ‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺩﺭﻙ ﺒﻭﺴﺎﺌل ﺘﺨﺘﻠﻑ ﻋﻥ ﻭﺴﺎﺌل ﺠﺴﺩﻯ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻟﻌﻴﻥ ﻭﺍﻷﺫﻥ ﻭﻜﺎﻓﺔ ﺃﺠﻬﺯﺓ ﻭﻭﺴﺎﺌل ﺍﻹﺩﺭﺍﻙ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺠﺴﺩﻯ …‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﻘﻭﺓ ﺠﺎﺫﺒﺔ ﺘﺸﺩﻨﻰ..‬ ‫ﻗﻭﺓ ﺠﺎﺫﺒﻴﺔ ﻤﻀﺎﺩﺓ ﻟﻠﺠﺎﺫﺒﻴﺔ ﺍﻷﺭﻀﻴﺔ.. ﻗـﻭﺓ‬ ‫ﺠﺎﺫﺒﻴﺔ ﻷﻋﻠـﻰ.. ﻭﺍﺴﺘﺴـﻠﻤﺕ ﻟﻬـﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻘـﻭﺓ‬ ‫ﻭﺘﺭﻜﺘﻬﺎ ﺘﻔﻌل ﻤﺎ ﺘﺭﻴﺩ ﺒﻰ …‬ ‫ﻭﻭﺠﺩﺕ ﻨﻔﺴﻰ ﺃﺭﺘﻔﻊ ﻨﺤﻭ ﻨﻔﻕ ﻤﻅﻠﻡ..‬ ‫ﻭﻭﺠﺩﺕ ﻜﺎﺌﻥ ﻨﻭﺭﺍﻨﻰ ﻴﻨﺘﻅﺭﻨﻰ ﻋﻨـﺩ ﻤـﺩﺨل‬ ‫ـﺕ ﺃﻥ ـﺎﺌﻥ ـﻭﺭﺍﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨـ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻜـ‬ ‫ـﻕ.. ﻓﻬﻤـ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻔـ‬ ‫ﺴﻴﺼﻁﺤﺒﻨﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺭﺤﻠﺘﻰ ﺩﺍﺨل ﺍﻟﻨﻔﻕ ﺍﻟﻤﻅﻠﻡ..‬ ‫ﻭﺴﻤﻌﺕ ﺃﺼﻭﺍﺕ ﺭﺠﺎل‬ ‫ﺒﺩﺍ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﻕ ﺒﻼ ﻨﻬﺎﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﻨﺴﺎﺀ ﻴﺒﻜﻭﻥ ﻭﻴﺼﺭﺨﻭﻥ..‬
  • 90. ‫ﺜﻡ ﺒﺩﺃﺕ ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻰ ﺘﺘﻭﺍﻟﻰ ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺸﺭﻴﻁ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺼﻭﺭ.. ﺘﻭﻗﻔﺕ ﺃﻤـﺎﻤﻰ ﺃﺤـﺩ ﺍﻟﻤﺸـﻬﺩ‬ ‫ﻭﻜﻨﺕ ﻗﺩ ﻅﻨﻨﺕ ﺃﻨﻨﻰ ﻨﺴﻴﺘﻪ ﻓﺈﺫﺍ ﺒـﻰ ﺃﺼـﻌﻕ‬ ‫ﻟﺭﺅﻴﺘﻪ.. ﺍﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﻀﺎﺠﻌﺘﻬﺎ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺴﻨﻭﺍﺕ.. ﻜﻨﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﻭل ﻤﺭﺓ ﺃﺠﺭﺏ ﻫﺫﺍ.. ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﻋـﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﻭﻟـﻡ‬ ‫ﺼﻌﻘﻨﻰ ﺍﻹﺤﺴﺎﺱ ﺒﺎﻟﺨﺠـل‬ ‫ﺃﻋﺭﻑ ﺃﺴﻤﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﻌﺎﺭ.. ﻭﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺃﻯ ﻤﺩﻯ ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﺫﻟـﻙ‬ ‫ﺇﻨﺴﺎﻨﻴﺎ.. ﻭﻭﺠـﺩﺘﻨﻰ ﺃﺸـﺎﺭﻙ ﺃﻫـل ﺍﻟﻨﻔـﻕ‬ ‫ﺼﺭﺨﺎﺘﻬﻡ.. ﺜﻡ ﺘﻭﺍﻟﺕ ﺍﻟﺼﻭﺭ.. ﺍﻟﻤﻭﺍﻗﻑ..‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺒﺎﻏﺘﻨﻰ ﺍﻟﺸﻌﻭﺭ ﺒﺄﻥ ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻰ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﻤﻤﺘﻠﺌـﺔ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﺯﻴﻑ.. ﺠﻨﺱ ﻤﺯﻴﻑ.. ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭ ﻤﺯﻴﻔﺔ..‬ ‫ﺍﺒﺘﺴﺎﻤﺎﺕ ﻤﺯﻴﻔﺔ.. .ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺅﺍل ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﺩﻭﺭ ﻓﻰ ﺭﺃﺴﻰ: ﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻟﻡ ﺍﻜﺘﺸﻑ ﻜـل ﻫـﺫﺍ‬ ‫..!ﻭﺒـﺩﺕ ﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺯﻴﻑ ﻓﻰ ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻰ ﻗﺒل ﺍﻵﻥ؟‬ ‫ﺃﺤﻼﻡ ﺍﻟﻁﻴﺭﺍﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺎﺒﻘﺔ ﻭﺘﺤﺩﻯ ﺠﺎﺫﺒﻴﺔ ﺍﻷﺭﺽ‬ ‫ﻭﻜﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﻤﺤﺎﻭﻟﺔ ﻟﻠﻬﺭﺏ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻘﻴﻭﺩ ﻭﺍﻟﺯﻴـﻑ..‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﻕ ﺍﻟﻤﻅﻠﻡ ﺃﺼﺭﺥ ﻭﺃﻋـﺎﻨﻰ ﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﺸﺎﻋﺭ ﺍﻟﻨﺩﻡ.. ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻭﺼﻠﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻨﻬﺎﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﻕ‬
  • 91. ‫ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﺄﻨﻨﻰ ﻗﺩ ﺘﻁﻬﺭﺕ ﺘﻤﺎﻤﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻷﻜﺎﺫﻴـﺏ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﺯﻴﻑ …‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺒﺩﺍ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻬﺎﻴﺔ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﻕ ﻀﻭﺀ ﺒﺎﻫﺭ ﻴﺸـﻊ‬ ‫ﺤﺒﺎ ﻭﺭﺤﻤﺔ.. ﻏﺸﻴﺘﻨﻰ ﻁﻤﺄﻨﻴﻨـﺔ ﻭﻓﺭﺤـﺔ ﻻ‬ ‫ﺴﺒﻴل ﺇﻟﻰ ﻭﺼﻔﻬﺎ ﺜﻡ ﻻﺤﺕ ﺃﻤـﺎﻡ ﻨـﺎﻅﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﻤﺩﻴﻨﺔ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻜﺭﻴﺴﺘﺎل ﺘﺴﺒﺢ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻭﺭ ﺍﻟﺭﺤﻴﻡ..‬ ‫ﻭﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ ﺍﻟﺘﻘﺩﻡ ﻓﻠﻡ ﺍﺴﺘﻁﻊ.. ﺜـﻡ ﺃﻟﻘـﻰ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺭﻭﻋﻰ ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﻟﻡ ﻴﺤﻥ ﺍﻟﻭﻗﺕ ﺒﻌﺩ.. ﺜﻡ ﻭﺠـﺩﺘﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﻭﺠﺩﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﺘﺭﺍﺠﻊ ﺴﺭﻴﻌﺎ ﻨﺤﻭ ﺍﻟﻨﻔﻕ ﺍﻟﻤﻅﻠﻡ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻨﻔﺴﻰ ﺩﺍﺨل ﺤﺠﺭﺘﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﻭﺍﻟﻤﻤﺭﻀـﺔ‬ ‫ﻻ ﺘﺯﺍل ﺘﺠﻠﺱ ﻓﻰ ﻨﻔﺱ ﻤﻜﺎﻨﻬـﺎ.. ﻭﻭﺠـﺩﺕ‬ ‫ﻨﻔﺴﻰ ﻤﺸﺩﻭﺩﺍ ﻨﺤﻭ ﺠﺴﺩﻯ.. ﻭﺤﺎﻭﻟﺕ ﻤﻘﺎﻭﻤﺔ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻌﻭﺩﺓ ﻟﺠﺴﺩﻯ ﻭﺍﻟﺭﺠﻭﻉ ﻟﻤﺩﻴﻨـﺔ ﺍﻟﻜﺭﻴﺴـﺘﺎل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺘﺴﺒﺢ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻭﺭ ﺍﻟـﺭﺤﻴﻡ.. ﻭﻟﻜـﻥ ﻗـﻭﺓ‬ ‫ﺩﺨﻠﺕ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺩﻓﻌﻨﻰ ﻨﺤﻭ ﺠﺴﺩﻯ..‬ ‫ﺠﺴﺩﻯ ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﺃﺸـﻌﺭ ﺒـﺎﻟﺤﻨﻕ.. ﺜـﻡ ﺴـﻤﻌﺕ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻤﺭﻀﺔ ﺘﺨﺒﺭ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﺒﻌﻭﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﺘﻨﻔﺱ ﻟﻰ …‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻤﻌﻨﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺤﻠﻡ؟ !‬ ‫.…‬
  • 92. ‫- 33 -‬ ‫-ﻨﺴﻴﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺃﺭﻭﻯ ﻟﻙ ﻭﺍﻗﻌﺔ ﺃﺜﺭﺕ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﻜﺜﻴﺭﺍ …‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﺫﻟﻙ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﺘﺎﻟﻰ ﻟﻭﺼﻭل ﺴﻤﺎﺀ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﻟﻨﺩﻥ …ﺍﺠﺘﻤﻌﻨﺎ ﻓﻰ ﻏﺭﻓﻰ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒـﺎﻟﻤﻨﺯل‬ ‫ﻭﻗﺩ ﺍﺘﻔﻘﻨﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﺼﻁﻨﺎﻉ ﺠﻭ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤـﺭﺡ‬ ‫ﻴﺅﺜﺭ ﺇﻴﺠﺎﺒﻴﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻨﻔﺴﻴﺔ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻭﻴﺒﻌـﺩﻫﺎ ﻋـﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﺴـﺘﻁﺎﻋﺕ ﺼـﻔﺎﺀ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻔﻜﻴﺭ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺽ..‬ ‫ﺒﻁﺒﻴﻌﺘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺤﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﺸﺎﻜﺴﺔ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺤـﺩﺙ ﻫـﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﺴﺭﻋﺎﻥ ﻤﺎ ﺍﻨﺩﻤﺎﺠﻨﺎ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺄﺜﻴﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﻁﻠﻭﺏ..‬ ‫ﺠﻭ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺡ.. ﺃﻗﻭل ﻨﻜﺘـﺔ.. ﻭﻴـﺭﻭﻯ ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﻨﺎﺩﺭﺓ.. ﻭﺃﻤﻰ ﺘﺴﺘﻤﻊ ﺇﻟﻴﻨﺎ ﻭﺘﺸﺎﺭﻜﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻀـﺤﻙ‬ ‫.…ﺜﻡ ﺍﻨﺘﺒﻬﻨﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺼﻭﺕ ﺴﻘﻭﻁ ﺸﻰﺀ ﻋﻠﻰ‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺘﺒﻴﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﺃﺭﺽ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ ﻭﺼﻭﺕ ﺘﻬﺸﻡ ﺯﺠﺎﺝ..‬ ‫ﺒﺴﺭﻋﺔ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺴﻘﻁ ﻫﻭ ﺍﻟﺒﺭﻭﺍﺯ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻴﺤﻤل‬ ‫ﺴـﻘﻁ ﺩﻭﻥ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﺼﻭﺭﺓ ﺯﻓﺎﻑ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻭﺃﺒـﻰ..‬ ‫ﻴﻘﺘﺭﺏ ﻤﻨﻪ ﺃﺤﺩ .…‬ ‫ﺘﻜﻬﺭﺏ ﺍﻟﺠﻭ ﻓﺠﺄﺓ …‬
  • 93. ‫ﻭﺃﺴﺭﻉ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻻﻟﺘﻘﺎﻁ ﺍﻟﺼﻭﺭﺓ ﻤﻥ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺭﺽ.. ﻜﺎﻥ ﺯﺠﺎﺝ ﺍﻟﺒـﺭﻭﺍﺯ ﻗـﺩ ﺜﻬﺸـﻡ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻜﺎﻤل ﻭﺘﻨﺎﺜﺭﺕ ﺸـﻅﺎﻴﺎﻩ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺍﻷﺭﺽ..‬ ‫ﻭﺤﻤل ﺃﺒﻰ ﺍﻟﺼﻭﺭﺓ ﻭﺨﺭﺝ ﺒﺴﺭﻋﺔ ﻟﻴﺒﺤﺙ ﻋﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﺤل ﺒﺭﺍﻭﻴﺯ ﻟﺘﺭﻜﻴﺏ ﺇﻁﺎﺭ ﺯﺠﺎﺝ ﺠﺩﻴﺩ..‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﺘﻨﻁﻕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﺤﺭﻑ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻰ ﻋﻨـﺩﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﻨﻅﺭﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﺃﺩﺭﻜﺕ ﻤﺎ ﻴﺩﻭﺭ ﺒﺭﺃﺴﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﻭﺍﻀﺤﺎ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺍﻋﺘﺒـﺭﺕ ﺴـﻘﻭﻁ ﺼـﻭﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺯﻓﺎﻓﻬﺎ ﻭﺘﻬﺸﻡ ﺍﻟﺯﺠﺎﺝ ﺒﻤﺜﺎﺒـﺔ ﻨـﺫﻴﺭ ﺒﻤـﻭﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﺸﻴﻙ .……‬
  • 94. ‫- 43 -‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﺨﺎﻤﺱ ﻟﺩﺨﻭﻟﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ..‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺎ ﻤﺠﺘﻤﻌﻴﻥ ﺤﻭل ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﻰ ﻏﺭﻓﺘﻬﺎ.. ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﺘﺄﻟﻡ ﻭﺃﺠﻭﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﻐﺭﻓﺔ ﺨﺎﻟﻴـﺔ ﺇﻻ ﻤـﻥ ﺼـﻭﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﺄﻭﻫﺎﺘﻬﺎ.. ﻁﻠﺒﻨﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﻤﺭﻀﺔ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺤﻀﺭ ﻟﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺩﻭﺍﺀ ﻤﺴﻜﻨﺎ ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﻤﺭﻀﺔ ﺘـﺄﺨﺭﺕ ﺠـﺩﺍ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫‪‬‬ ‫ﻭﻜﻨﺎ ﺃﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﺍﻨﺘﻅﺎﺭ ﺇﺤﻀﺎﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﻤﺭﻀﺔ ﻟﻠﻤﺴـﻜﻥ‬ ‫ﻨﺘﺒﺎﺩل ﻨﻅﺭﺍﺕ ﺤﺯﻴﻨﺔ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺘﻭﻗﻔﺕ ﻋﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺄﻭﻩ ﻓﺠﺄﺓ ﻭﺤﻤﻠﻘﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻔﺭﺍﻍ:‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻠـ ﺍ ﺍ ﻩ.. ﺍﻟﻠـ ﺍ ﺍ ﻩ..‬ ‫ﺘﺒﺎﺩﻟﻨﺎ ﻨﻅﺭﺍﺕ ﻤﻨﺩﻫﺸﺔ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻷﻤﻰ:‬ ‫-ﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﺘﺭﻴﻥ ﻴﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ ؟!..‬ ‫ﻓﺄﺠﺎﺒﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻭﻫﻰ ﻻ ﺘﺯﺍل ﺘﺤﻤﻠﻕ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻔﺭﺍﻍ:‬ ‫-ﺸﺊ ﺠﻤﻴل.. ﺸﺊ ﺠﻤﻴل..‬ ‫ﻭﻷﻜﺜﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺴﺎﻋﺔ ﺤﺎﻭﻟﻨﺎ ﺃﻥ ﻨﺴـﺘﺨﻠﺹ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺃﻯ ﻤﻌﻠﻭﻤﺔ ﻋﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﺘﻪ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺤﻤﻠﻕ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻔﺭﺍﻍ ﺇﻻ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺨﺘﺒﺊ ﻭﺭﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﺼﻤﺕ..‬
  • 95. ‫ﺇﺫﺍ ﺤﺩﺜﻨﺎﻫﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺸﺊ ﺃﺨﺭ ﺘﻜﻠﻤﺕ.. ﻭﺇﺫﺍ ﻋـﺩﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺴﺅﺍل ﻋﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﺘﻪ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺴﻜﺕ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﺭﺃﺘﻪ ﺴﺭﺍ؟!..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﻫﻭ ﺴﺭﻫﺎ ﻤﻊ ﺍﷲ؟!..‬ ‫ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﺃﺨﺒﺭﺘﻨﻰ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻴـﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﺴـﺎﺒﻕ‬ ‫ﺃﺜﻨﺎﺀ ﻭﺠﻭﺩﻫﺎ ﻤﻊ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﺘﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻅﻬﺭ.. ﻓﻬﻤـﺕ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﺘﺭﻯ ﺤﺼﺎﻥ ﺃﺒﻴﺽ ﺒﺎﻟﻐﺭﻓـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻭﺃﺨﺒﺭﺘﻬﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺃﻨﺼﺭﻑ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻔﻬﻡ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻜﻼﻡ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ؟!..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﺘﻪ ﺘﻭﻗﻔـﺕ ﻋـﻥ‬ ‫ﻻﺯﺍﻟـﺕ ﺤﺘـﻰ ﺍﻵﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺄﻭﻩ ﻭﺫﻫﺏ ﺍﻷﻟـﻡ..‬ ‫ﺃﺘﺴﺎﺀل ﻋﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﺘﻪ ﺃﻤﻰ…..‬
  • 96. ‫- 53 -‬ ‫:ﺃﺨﺒﺭﻨﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﺄﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻁﻠﺒـﺕ ﺭﺅﻴـﺔ‬ ‫ﺠﺩﺘﻰ …‬ ‫ﺃﺩﺭﻜﺕ ﺼﻌﻭﺒﺔ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺄﻟﺔ..‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﻰ ﻭﻀـﻊ ﻻ ﻴﺴـﻤﺢ ﻟﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻻﻨﺘﻘﺎل ﺇﻟﻰ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ.. ﻭﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻫﺭ ﻤﺕ ﻭﻓﻘﺩﺕ‬ ‫ﺠـﺩﺘﻰ ﻟـﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺩﺭﺓ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﺭﻜﺔ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺯﻤﻥ..‬ ‫ﺘﺨﺭﺝ ﻤﻥ ﺒﻴﺘﻬﺎ ﻤﻨﺫ ﺃﻜﺜﺭ ﻤﻥ ﻋﺸﺭﺓ ﺴﻨﻭﺍﺕ..‬ ‫ﺤﺘﻰ ﻭﻗﺕ ﻗﺭﻴﺏ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺘﺯﻭﺭ ﺠـﺩﺘﻰ..‬ ‫ﻤﻨﺫ ﻁﻔﻭﻟﺘﻨﺎ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻻﺜﻨﻴﻥ ﻤﻥ ﻜل ﺃﺴـﺒﻭﻉ‬ ‫ﻫﻭ ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺼﺹ ﻟﺯﻴﺎﺭﺓ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ.. ﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻻﺜﻨـﻴﻥ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺃﺤﺩ ﻤﻘﺩﺴﺎﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﻋﻠـﻰ ﻤـﺩﻯ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺴﻨﻭﺍﺕ ﻁﻭﻴﻠﺔ ﻅل ﺒﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻻﺜﻨﻴﻥ ﻫﻭ ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺼﺹ‬ ‫ﻟﺠﺩﺘﻰ.. ﺍﻟﺯﻴـﺎﺭﺓ ﺍﻵﻥ ﺃﺼـﺒﺤﺕ ﻤﺴـﺘﺤﻴﻠﺔ‬ ‫ﻷﻤﻰ.. ﻭﻟﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ.. ﻭﻤﻊ ﺫﻟـﻙ ﻓﺭﻏﺒـﺔ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﻭﻫﻰ ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻭﻀﻊ ﺘﺼﺒﺢ ﺭﻏﺒﺔ ﻤﻘﺩﺴﺔ‬ ‫ﻭﻻ ﻤﻔﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺘﺤﻘﻴﻘﻬﺎ …‬ ‫ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﻗﺎﻟﺕ:‬
  • 97. ‫ﺒﺎﻷﻤﺱ ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺃﺤﺩ ﺍﻟﻤﻤﺭﻀﺎﺕ ﺃﻥ ﺭﻭﺡ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﺘﺸﺒﺜﺕ ﺒﺎﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﺤﺘﻰ ﺘﺭﻯ ﺃﻤﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻷﺒﻰ ﻤﺘﺤﻴﺭﺍ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﺍﻟﻌﻤل؟!..‬ ‫ﻻﺒﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻨﺤﻀﺭ ﺠﺩﺘﻙ..‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺕ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻅﺭﻭﻑ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ..‬ ‫ﻻ ﺨﻴﺎﺭ ﻟﻨﺎ..‬ ‫ﻭﻜﻴﻑ ﺴﻨﺤﻀﺭ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ؟!..‬ ‫ﺃﻁﺭﻕ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺴﺎﻫﻤﺎ:‬ ‫ﺴﻨﺤﻤﻠﻬﺎ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻨﻘﺎﻟﺔ ﻭﻨﺤﻀﺭﻫﺎ ﺒﺴـﻴﺎﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻹﺴﻌﺎﻑ..‬ ‫ﻤﺘﻰ ﻨﺫﻫﺏ ﺇﻟﻴﻬﺎ؟!..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻥ ﺴﻨﺩﺒﺭ ﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ ﺍﻹﺴـﻌﺎﻑ‬ ‫ﺍﻵﻥ..‬ ‫ﺃﻭﻻ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺃﺤﻀﺭ ﺃﻴﻰ ﺴـﻴﺎﺭﺓ ﺍﻹﺴـﻌﺎﻑ‬ ‫ﺍﻨﻁﻠﻘﻨﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ …‬ ‫ﺼﻌﺩﺕ ﻤﻊ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻭﺴﺎﺌﻕ ﺍﻹﺴـﻌﺎﻑ..‬ ‫ﻭﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﺘﻨﺎ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﺠﺯﻋﺕ ﻭﺃﺼﻔﺭ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ..‬
  • 98. ‫ﻀﺭﺒﺕ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﺒﻴـﺩﻫﺎ ﻋﻠـﻰ ﺼـﺩﺭﻫﺎ‬ ‫ﻭﺒﺎﺩﺭﺕ ﺃﺒﻰ:‬ ‫-ﻫل ﺤﺩﺙ ﺸﺊ؟‬ ‫ﻁﻤﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﺃﺒﻰ:‬ ‫-ﺘﺭﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺭﺍﻙ‬ ‫ﺒﻜﺕ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺃﺒﻰ ﻤﻬﺩﺌﺎ:‬ ‫-ﺘﻤﺎﺴﻜﻰ ﻴﺎ ﺤﺎﺠﺔ.. ﻜل ﺸﻰﺀ ﺒـﺄﻤﺭ‬ ‫ﺍﷲ..‬ ‫ﻭﻀﻌﻨﺎ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺎﻟﺔ.. ﻋﺎﻭﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﺒﻰ ﻭﺴﺎﺌﻕ ﺍﻹﺴﻌﺎﻑ ﻓﻰ ﺤﻤل ﺠﺩﺘﻰ …‬ ‫ﺃﺩﺨﻠﻨﺎ ﺍﻟﻨﻘﺎﻟـﺔ ﻓـﻰ ﻤﻜﺎﻨﻬـﺎ ﺍﻟﺨﻠﻔـﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ.. ﺠﻠﺴﺕ ﺒﺠﺎﻨﺏ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻭﺠﻠﺱ ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺠﻭﺍﺭ ﺍﻟﺴﺎﺌﻕ..‬ ‫ﻭﻀﻊ ﺍﻟﺴﺎﺌﻕ ﺸﺭﻴﻁ ﻗﺭﺁﻥ ﻓﻰ ﻤﺴـﺠل‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﻴﺎﺭﺓ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻻ ﺘﺯﺍل ﺘﺒﻜﻰ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻭﺼﻭﺘﻬﺎ ﻴﺨﺘﻨﻕ ﺒﺎﻟﺒﻜﺎﺀ:‬ ‫ﻟﻡ ﺘﻐﻀﺒﻨﻰ ﺃﻤﻙ ﻴﻭﻤﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 99. ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﺃﺭﺒﺕ ﻋﻠﻰ ﻜﺘﻔﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﺘﻤﺎﺴﻜﻰ ﺃﻤﺎﻤﻬﺎ ﻴﺎ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ‬ ‫ﻻ ﺘﺨﻑ ﻴﺎ ﺃﺒﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﺴﻜﺘﺕ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻗﻠﻴﻼ.. ﺜﻡ ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﻟﻰ..‬ ‫ﺃﻗﺭ ﺃﻟﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻘﺭﺁﻥ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ ﻴﺎ ﺃﺒﻨﻰ..‬ ‫ﺃﻨﺎ ﺃﻓﻌل ﺫﻟﻙ ﻴﺎ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ..‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻭﺼﻠﻨﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ ﺃﺤﻀـﺭﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﻟﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻜﺭﺴـﻴﺎ ﻤﺘﺤﺭﻜـﺎ …ﺃﺩﺨﻠﻨﺎﻫـﺎ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺼﻌﺩ.. ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺭﺃﺘﻬﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺍﺒﺘﺴﻤﺕ.. ﺩﻓﻌﻨﺎ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻜﺭﺴﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺘﺤﺭﻙ ﻟﻴﻼﺼﻕ ﺴـﺭﻴﺭ ﺃﻤـﻰ..‬ ‫ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻗﺒﻠﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ …‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ:‬ ‫ﺴﻼﻤﺘﻙ ﻴﺎ ﺒﻨﺘﻰ.. ﺃﻟﻑ ﺴﻼﻤﺔ‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻬﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ:‬ ‫ﺭﺍﻀﻴﺔ ﻋﻨﻰ ﻴﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ ؟..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺠﺩﺕ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺒﻜﻰ:‬ ‫ﺭﺍﻀﻴﺔ ﻴﺎ ﺒﻨﺘﻰ.. ﺭﺍﻀﻴﺔ..‬
  • 100. ‫ﺒﻌﺩ ﺫﻟﻙ ﻟﻡ ﺘﻨﻁﻘـﺎ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺘـﺎ ﺘﺘﺒـﺎﺩﻻﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻅﺭﺍﺕ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﻤﻭﻉ ﻓﻰ ﺼﻤﺕ.. ﺒﺩﺃ ﻟﻰ ﺃﻥ ﻜل‬ ‫ﻭﺍﺤﺩﺓ ﺘﺭﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺸﺒﻊ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻨﻅـﺭ ﻟﻸﺨـﺭﻯ..‬ ‫ﺒﻌﺩ ﻓﺘﺭﺓ ﻻﺤﻅﺕ ﺇﺸﺎﺭﺓ ﻤﻥ ﻴﺩ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻷﺒﻰ ﺒﻌﻴﺩﺍ‬ ‫ﻋﻥ ﻨﻅﺭ ﺠـﺩﺘﻰ.. ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺘﺭﻴـﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻘـﻭل‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻹﺸﺎﺭﺓ ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﻴﻜﻔﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ.. ﻓﻬﻡ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺍﻹﺸﺎﺭﺓ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺃﺒﻰ ﻟﺠﺩﺘﻰ:‬ ‫ﻫﻴﺎ ﺒﻨﺎ ﻴﺎ ﺤﺎﺠﺔ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻻﻤﻰ:‬ ‫ﺃﻻ ﺘﺭﻴﺩﻴﻥ ﺸﻴﺌﺎ ﻴﺎ ﺍﺒﻨﺘﻰ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﺄﺴﻰ:‬ ‫ﺃﺩﻋﻰ ﻟﻰ ﻴﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ.. ﺃﺩﻋﻰ ﻟﻰ …‬ ‫ﻭﺨﺭﺝ ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﺩﻓﻌﺕ ﺍﻟﻜﺭﺴﻰ ﺒﺠﺩﺘﻰ..‬ ‫ﻤﻌﻨﺎ .…‬ ‫ﺒﻌﺩ ﺫﻟﻙ ﺃﺨﺒﺭﺘﻨﻰ ﺴـﻤﺎﺀ ﺒـﺄﻨﻰ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺭﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺒﺄﻨﻬﺎ ﻁﻠﺒﺕ ﺼﺭﻑ ﺠـﺩﺘﻰ ﻷﻨﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻠﺤﻅﺔ ﺘﺘﺄﻟﻡ ﻭﻻ ﺘﺭﻴﺩ ﺃﻥ ﺘﺘﻭﺠﻊ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﺎﻡ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ …‬
  • 101. ‫- 63 -‬ ‫ﺤﺩﺜﻨﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ ﻋﻥ ﻤﺴﺄﻟﺔ ﺩﻓﻥ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺤﺎﻟﺔ ﺤﺩﻭﺙ ﺍﻟﻭﻓﺎﺓ …‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻗﺩ ﻗﺭﺭ ﺒﺼﺭﺍﺤﺔ ﺃﻥ ﺍﻷﻤﺭ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻤﺴﺎﻟﺔ ﻭﻗـﺕ ﻓﺤﺴـﺏ.. .‬ ‫ﻭﺼﺭﺡ ﺒﺈﻋﻁﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﻤﺴـﻜﻨﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﻘﻭﻴـﺔ ﺒـﺩﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﻗﺭﺭ ﺒﺄﻥ ﺍﻷﻭﻟﻭﻴﺔ ﺍﻵﻥ ﻟﺘﺠﻨﻴﺒﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﻤﺤﺎﺫﻴﺭ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺸﻌـﻭﺭ ﺒﺎﻟﻤﺯﻴـﺩ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻷﻟـﻡ.. .‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ ﻜﻡ ﻫﻭ ﻤـﺅﻟﻡ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﺘﻨﺎﻗﺵ ﺘﻔﺎﺼﻴل ﺩﻓﻥ ﺃﻤﻙ ﻭﻫﻰ ﻻ ﺘﺯﺍل ﺤﻴﺔ؟..‬ ‫ﺃﺨﺒﺭﻨﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﺃﺴﺘﺄﺫﻥ ﺠﺩﺘﻰ ﻭﺃﺨﻭﺍﻟﻰ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺩﻓﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﻤﻘﺒﺭﺓ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﻩ ﺇﺫﺍ ﺠـﺎﺀ ﺃﻤـﺭ ﺍﷲ.. .‬ ‫ﻭﻓﻬﻤﺕ ﺃﻨﻪ ﻓﻭﻀﻭﻩ ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻷﻤﺭ.. ﻭﻗﺎل ﻟﻰ‬ ‫ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﺃﺘﻔﻕ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺘﺠﺩﻴﺩ ﺍﻟﻤﻘﺒـﺭﺓ ﻭﺘﻌﻠﻴﺘﻬـﺎ ﻭﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻘﺒﺭﺓ ﺴﺘﻐﻁﻰ ﺒﻨﻭﻉ ﻓﺎﺨﺭ ﻤـﻥ ﺍﻟﺭﺨـﺎﻡ..‬ ‫ﻭﺒﺭﺭ ﻟﻰ ﺭﻏﺒﺘﻪ ﻓﻰ ﺩﻓﻥ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﻤﻘﺒـﺭﺓ ﻭﺍﻟـﺩﻩ‬ ‫ﺒﺄﻨﻪ ﻴﻨﻭﻯ ﺃﻥ ﻴﺩﻓﻥ ﻤﻌﻬﺎ ﻭﻤﻊ ﻭﺍﻟﺩﻩ.. ﻜﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺘﻤﻊ ﺇﻟﻴﻪ ﺼﺎﻤﺘﺎ.. ﻭﻻ ﺃﺩﺭﻯ ﻟﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﺃﻟﺤـﺕ‬
  • 102. ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﻤﺨﻴﻠﺘﻰ ﺼﻭﺭﺓ ﺃﻫﺭﺍﻤﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﺠﻴﺯﺓ ﺍﻟﺜﻼﺜﺔ..‬ ‫.‬
  • 103. ‫- 73 -‬ ‫:ﺸﻌﺭﺕ ﺒﺭﻨﺔ ﺃﺴﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺼـﻭﺕ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﻘﻭل:‬ ‫ﻴﺎﻩ.. ﻤﺎ ﺃﻗﺼﺭ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺤﻴﺎﺓ‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﻟﻘﺩ ﺍﺒﺘﻠﻴﺕ ﻓﺼﺒﺭﺕ.. ﺃﺘﻌﺭﻓﻴﻥ ﻴﺎ ﺃﻤـﻰ‬ ‫ِ‬ ‫ِ‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﺠﺯﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﺼﺒﺭ؟..‬ ‫ﺴﻜﺘﺕ . . . .‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ:‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺠﻨﺔ ﻫﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﺯﺍﺀ.. ﺃﺘﻌﺭﻓﻴﻥ ﻤﺎﺫﺍ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺠﻨﺔ؟..‬ ‫ﻨﻅﺭﺕ ﺇﻟ ﱠ . . . .‬ ‫ﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﻜﻤﻠﺕ:‬ ‫ـﺎ‬ ‫ـﺅ ﻭﺘﺭﺍﺒﻬـ‬ ‫ـﺎﻫﺎ ﺍﻟﻠﺅﻟـ‬ ‫ـﺔ ﺤﺼـ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺠﻨـ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺯﻋﻔﺭﺍﻥ.. ﻟﻠﻤﺅﻤﻥ ﻓﻴﻬﺎ ﻗﺼـﺭ ﻭﺨﻴﻤـﺔ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺼﺭ ﻤﻥ ﺫﻫﺏ.. ﻭﺍﻟﺨﻴﻤـﺔ ﻟﺅﻟـﺅﺓ ﻜﺒﻴـﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻤﺠﻭﻓﺔ.. ﻭﺃﻨﻬﺎﺭ ﻤﻥ ﻟﺒﻥ ﻭﻋﺴل.. ﻭﻓﻭﺍﻜﻪ ﻻ‬ ‫ﻭﻟﺤﻡ ﻁﻴﺭ ﻻ ﺤـﺩ‬ ‫ﻤﺜﻴل ﻟﻁﻌﻤﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺩﻨﻴﺎ..‬
  • 104. ‫ﻟﺠﻤﺎل ﻁﻌﻤﻪ.. ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﻨﺔ ﻨﻭﺭ ﺩﺍﺌﻤﺎ ﻭﻻ ﻴﻭﺠﺩ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻅﻼﻡ.. ﻭﺤﻴﺎﺓ ﺒﻼ ﺸﻴﺨﻭﺨﺔ ﻭﻻ ﻤﻭﺕ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻤﻌﺕ ﻋﻴﻨﺎ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﺒﺭﻴﻕ ﺨﺎﻁﻑ ﻭﻫـﻰ‬ ‫ﺘﻘﻭل:‬ ‫ﺍﷲ..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻟﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺠﻨﺔ ﻴﺭﻯ ﺍﻟﻤﺅﻤﻥ ﺍﷲ ﺒﺎﻟﻌﻴﻥ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻨﻰ ﺒﺩﻫﺸﺔ:‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻌﻴﻥ؟!..‬ ‫ﻗﻠﺕ ﻤﺅﻜﺩﺍ:‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻨﻌﻡ ﺒﺎﻟﻌﻴﻥ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺒﻔﺭﺤﺔ:‬ ‫ﺍﷲ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﺃﻫﻨﺎﻙ ﺠﺎﺌﺯﺓ ﺃﺠﻤل ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺠﻨﺔ ﻭﺭﺅﻴﺔ ﺍﷲ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻌﻴﻥ؟..‬ ‫ﺃﺠﺎﺒﺕ:‬ ‫ﻻ ﻴﺎ ﺍﺒﻨﻰ.. ﺇﻨﻬﺎ ﺃﺠﻤل ﺠﺎﺌﺯﺓ..‬
  • 105. ‫- 83‬ ‫:ﺃﻏﻠﻘﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻓﻤﻬﺎ ﻭﺼﺎﻤﺕ ﻋـﻥ ﻜـل‬ ‫ﺸﻰﺀ..‬ ‫ﺼﺎﻤﺕ ﻋﻥ ﺍﻷﻜل ﻭﺍﻟﺸـﺭﺏ ﻭﺍﻟﻜـﻼﻡ‬ ‫ﻭﺤﺘﻰ ﺍﻟﺩﻭﺍﺀ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﻜﻥ..‬ ‫ﻗﺒل ﺃﻥ ﺘﻐﻠﻕ ﻓﻤﻬﺎ ﻨﻬﺎﺌﻴﺎ ﺒﻴﻭﻡ ﻭﺍﺤﺩ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﺒﺩﺕ ﺭﻏﺒﺘﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻔﻁـﺭ ﻓـﻭﻻ.. ﻭﻜـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻨﺘﻅﺭﺕ ﺤﺘـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻭﻗﺕ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺎﺀ ﺍﻟﻤﺘﺄﺨﺭ..‬ ‫ﺫﻫﺒﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻟﺴﻭﻕ ﺍﻟﻘﺭﻴـﺏ‬ ‫ﻁﻠﻌﺕ ﺍﻟﺸﻤﺱ..‬ ‫ﻟﻠﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻰ.. ﺍﺸـﺘﺭﻴﺕ ﻟﻬـﺎ ﺨﺒـﺯﺍ ﻁﺎﺯﺠـﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺫﻟﻙ ﺍﻟﺼﺒﺎﺡ ﺃﻓﻁﺭﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﺒﺸﻬﻴﺔ‬ ‫ﻭﻓﻭﻻ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫.‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻴﻭﻡ ﺍﻟﺘـﺎﻟﻰ.. ﺃﻋﻠﻨـﺕ ﺍﻟﺼـﻭﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻁﻠﻕ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺇﺫﺍ ﻋﻁﺸـﺕ ﺃﺸـﺎﺭﺕ ﻟﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﺒﺘﺭﻁﻴﺏ ﻓﻤﻬـﺎ ﺒﺎﻟﻤـﺎﺀ.. ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﺘـﺭﻓﺽ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺸﺭﺏ.. ﻓﻘﻁ ﺘﺭﻁﻴﺏ ﺍﻟﻔﻡ.. ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺤـﺎﻭل‬ ‫ﻁﺒﻴﺏ ﻭﻀﻊ ﺨﺭﻁﻭﻡ ﻟﻠﺘﻐﺫﻴـﺔ ﻓـﻰ ﻓﻤﻬـﺎ..‬ ‫ﻓﺎﻤﺘﺜل ﺃﺒـﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﺸﺎﺭﺕ ﻷﺒﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﺭﻓﺽ ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻁﻊ..‬
  • 106. ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ‬ ‫ﻟﺭﻏﺒﺘﻬﺎ.. ﺍﻟﻤﺴﻜﻨﺎﺕ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ ﺭﻓﻀﺘﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﻌﺎﻨﻰ ﻤﻥ ﺁﻻﻡ ﻤﺒﺭﺤﺔ ﻭﺘﺠﺎﻫﺩ ﻻﺤﺘﻤﺎﻟﻬﺎ ﺒﺩﻭﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﺴﻜﻥ.. ﻜﺎﻥ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﻴﺘﻘﻠﺹ ﺒﺎﻷﻟﻡ ﻭﺘﺯﻭﻡ ﻤﻥ‬ ‫ﺁﻥ ﻵﺨﺭ.. ﻟﻡ ﻴﻜﻥ ﺫﻟﻙ ﻤﺤﺘﻤﻼ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﺴﺒﺔ ﻟﻨﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﺴﺘﺩﻋﻰ ﺃﺒﻰ ﺍﻟﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ "ﺼﻼﺡ "ﻭﻁﻠـﺏ ﻤﻨـﻪ‬ ‫ﺤﻘﻨﻬﺎ ﺒﻤﺨﺩﺭ ﻗﻭﻯ..‬ ‫ﻏﺎﺒﺕ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻥ ﺍﻟﻭﻋﻰ ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻬﺎ ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ ﻻ‬ ‫ﺘﺯﺍل ﺘﺯﻭﻡ.. ﻻ.. ﺒل ﻜﺎﻥ ﺸﻴﺌﺎ ﺃﻗﺭﺏ ﺇﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻌﻭﺍﺀ..‬ ‫ﺍﺴـﺘﺩﻋﻴﻨﺎ ﺍﻟـﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ "ﺼـﻼﺡ "ﻤـﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﻁﻠﺒﻨﺎ ﻤﻨﻪ ﺃﻥ ﻴﻌﻁﻴﻬﺎ ﺤﻘﻨﺔ ﺃﺨـﺭﻯ‬ ‫ﺃﺨﺭﻯ..‬ ‫ﻓﺎﻋﺘﺭﺽ..‬ ‫ﻗﺎل ﺍﻟﺩﻜﺘﻭﺭ "ﺼﻼﺡ":‬ ‫ﻟﻘﺩ ﺃﻋﻁﻴﺘﻬﺎ ﻤﺨﺩﺭﺍ ﻗﻭﻴﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻨﻌﻁﻴﻪ‬ ‫ﹰ ﹰ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻌﻤﻠﻴﺎﺕ..‬ ‫ﻭﻟﻜﻨﻪ ﺃﻤﺎﻡ ﺇﺼﺭﺍﺭﻨﺎ ﺍﻀﻁﺭ ﻷﻥ ﻴﻌﻁﻴﻬﺎ‬ ‫ﺤﻘﻨﺔ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ..‬
  • 107. ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻻ ﺘﺯﺍل ﺘﻌﻭﻯ ﺒﺎﻷﻟﻡ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺤـﺕ‬ ‫ﺘﺄﺜﻴﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﺨﺩﺭ..‬ ‫ﺃﺤﻀﺭﺕ ﺍﻟﻤﺼﺤﻑ ﻭﺠﻠﺴﺕ ﺒﺠﺎﻨﺒﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻗﺭﺃﺕ ﺴﻭﺭﺓ "ﻴﺱ "ﻋﺩﺓ ﻤﺭﺍﺕ.. ﻟـﻡ ﺘﻜـﻥ‬ ‫ﺘﺴﻤﻌﻨﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﻘﻁﻊ.. ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺓ ﻟﻡ ﺃﻜﻥ ﺃﻗـﺭﺃ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻘﺭﺁﻥ ﻟﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﻗﺭﺃ ﻤﻥ ﺃﺠﻠﻬﺎ..‬
  • 108. ‫- 93 -‬ ‫:ﻜﻨﺕ ﻨﺎﺌﻤﺎ ﻓـﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﺠـﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻤﺠـﺎﻭﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻟﺤﺠﺭﺓ ﺃﻤﻰ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺃﻴﻘﻅﺘﻨﻰ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ .."‬ ‫ﻗﺎﻟﺕ ﻟﻰ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺒﻜﻰ:‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻙ.. ﺍﻟﺒﻘﻴﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻙ..‬ ‫ﺴﺄﻟﺘﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺫﻫﻭل:‬ ‫ﻤﺎﺘﺕ؟!..‬ ‫ﺍﺭﺘﻤﺕ "ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻴﺭ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺘﺒﻜﻰ‬ ‫ﻭﺘﺭﺩﺩ:‬ ‫ﻤﺎﺘﺕ.. ﻤﺎﺘﺕ..‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﺴﺭﻋﺕ ﺇﻟﻰ ﻏﺭﻓـﺔ ﺃﻤـﻰ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺩﻤﻭﻉ ﺘﺘﺴﺎﻗﻁ ﺭﻏﻤﺎ ﻋﻨﻰ.. ﻜﺸﻔﺕ ﻭﺠﻪ ﺃﻤﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻐﻁﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﻤﻼﺀﺓ.. ﻨﻅﺭﺕ ﻓﻰ ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ.. ﻜﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﻴﺒﺘﺴﻡ.. ﺭﺃﻴﺕ ﻭﺠﻬﺎ ﻨﻭﺭﺍﻨﻴﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻤﺎ ﺃﺠﻤل ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ ﻋﻨـﺩﻤﺎ ﻴﺭﺤـل ﻋﻨـﻪ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﻟﻡ..‬
  • 109. ‫ﻜﺎﻨـﺕ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻠﺤﻅﺔ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤـﻭﺩ..‬ ‫ﻴﺤﻤﻠﻬـﺎ‬ ‫ﺭﻭﺤﻬﺎ ﻤﻠﻔﻭﻓﺔ ﻓﻰ ﺤﺭﻴﺭ ﺍﻟﺠﻨـﺔ..‬ ‫ﻤﻼﻙ ﺠﻤﻴل.. ﻴﺼﻌﺩ ﺒﻬﺎ ﺇﻟـﻰ ﺍﻟﺴـﻤﺎﺀ..‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﺘﺄﻜﻴﺩ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﻓﺭﺤﺔ ﻭﻫﻰ ﺫﺍﻫﺒﺔ ﻟﻠﻘﺎﺀ ﺍﷲ..‬ ‫ﺴﻴﻁﺭﻕ ﺍﻟﻤﻼﻙ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻴﺤﻤل ﺭﻭﺤﻬﺎ ﺒﺎﺏ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﺍﻷﻭﻟﻰ.. ﻭﺴﻴﺴـﺄل.. ﻤـﻥ ﺃﻨـﺕ؟..‬ ‫ﺴﻴﺫﻜﺭ ﺍﻟﻤﻼﻙ ﺍﺴﻤﻪ.. ﺜﻡ ﻴﺴـﺄﻟﻭﻨﻪ.. ﻭﻤـﻥ‬ ‫ﻤﻌﻙ؟ﺴﻴﺭﺩ.. ﻤﻌﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﺒﻴﻠﺔ.. ﺴﻴﻘﺎل ﻟﻪ.. ﻨﻌﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﺁﻤﻨﺕ ﻭﺼﺒﺭﺕ.. ﺴﻴﻨﺘﻘل ﺒﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻤـﻼﻙ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺴﻤﺎﺀ.. ﺴﻴﺼل ﺒﻬﺎ ﺇﻟﻰ ﺴـﺩﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﻨﺘﻬﻰ.. ﺴﻴﻔﺘﺢ ﻟﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺒﺎﺏ.. ﺴﺘﻌﺒﺭ ﺒﺤـﺭﺍ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻤﻥ ﻨﺎﺭ.. ﺜﻡ ﺒﺤﺭ ﻤﻥ ﻨﻭﺭ ﻓﺒﺤﺭ ﻤﻥ ﻅﻠﻤﺔ..‬ ‫ﺜﻡ ﺒﺤﺭ ﻤﻥ ﻤﺎﺀ.. ﺜﻡ ﺒﺤﺭ ﻤـﻥ ﺜﻠـﺞ.. ﺜـﻡ‬ ‫ﺘﺨﺘﺭﻕ ﺃﻤـﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﺠـﺏ ﺇﻟـﻰ ﻋـﺭﺵ ﺍﷲ..‬ ‫ﻭﺴﻴﻨﺎﺩﻯ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺤﻀﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻘﺩﺴـﻴﺔ.. ﻤـﺎ ﻫـﺫﻩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻔﺱ ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺠﺌﺘﻡ ﺒﻬـﺎ؟.. ﻓﻴﺠـﺎﺏ.. ﻫـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﺒﻴﻠﺔ.. ﻓﻴﻨﺎﺩﻯ ﻤـﻥ ﺍﻟﺤﻀـﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻘﺩﺴـﻴﺔ..‬ ‫ﻗﺭﺒﻭﻫﺎ ﻓﻨﻌﻡ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ..‬
  • 110. ‫ﺍﻨﺤﻨﻴﺕ ﻋﻠﻴﻬﺎ.. ﻭﻗﺒﻠﺕ ﺠﺒﻴﻨﻬﺎ.. ﺜﻡ ﻏﻁﻴـﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﺠﻬﻬﺎ..‬ ‫ﻫل ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻴﺎ "ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ "ﺃﻨﻪ ﻟﺤﻅﺔ ﻤﺎﺘﺕ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ ﻜﺎﻥ ﺠﺯﺀ ﻤﻨﻰ ﻗﺩ ﻤﺎﺕ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺃﺘﺤﺏ ﺃﻥ ﺘﻌﺭﻑ ﻤﺎ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﺠﺯ.. ﺤﺴﻨﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺇﻨﻪ ﺍﻟﻁﻔل ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻴﻌﻴﺵ ﺒﺩﺍﺨﻠﻰ ﻭﻴﺘﻐـﺫﻯ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﻭﺠﻭﺩﻫﺎ.. ﻟﺤﻅﺔ ﻤﻭﺘﻬﺎ ﻓﻁﻡ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻁﻔل‬ ‫ﺇﺠﺒﺎﺭﻴﺎ.. ﻭﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻴﻔﻁﻡ ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻁﻔـل ﺇﺠﺒﺎﺭﻴـﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺒﺎﻟﻤﻭﺕ ﻴﻤﻭﺕ ﻫﻭ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ.. ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻟﻁﻔل ﻴﻅـل‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻴﻌﻴﺵ ﺒﺩﺍﺨﻠﻙ ﻤﻬﻤﺎ ﺘﻘﺩﻡ ﻋﻤﺭﻙ ﻁﺎﻟﻤﺎ ﺃﻥ ﺃﻤﻙ‬ ‫ﻻ ﺘﺯﺍل ﺘﻌﻴﺵ.. ﻭﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺘﻤﻭﺕ ﻴﻤﻭﺕ ﻫـﺫﺍ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻁﻔل ﺃﻴﻀﺎ.. ﻭﺘﺸﻌﺭ ﺒﺄﻨﻙ ﻗﺩ ﺸﺨﺕ ﻓﺠﺄﺓ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬
  • 111. ‫- 04 -‬ ‫:ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﻤﺸﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺠﻨﺎﺯﺘﻬﺎ ﻤﺫﻫﻭﻻ.. ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺒﻌﺽ ﺍﻟﻠﺤﻅﺎﺕ ﻜﺎﻥ ﻴﺴﺎﻭﺭﻨﻰ ﺍﻟﺸﻙ ﻓـﻰ ﺃﻥ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﻰ ﺒﺎﻟﻨﻌﺵ ﺭﺒﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺍﻤﺭﺃﺓ ﺃﺨـﺭﻯ ﻏﻴـﺭ‬ ‫ﻭﻓﻰ ﻟﺤﻅﺎﺕ ﺃﺨﺭﻯ ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺸﻙ ﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻗﺩ ﻤﺎﺘﺕ ﺭﻏﻡ ﺃﻨﻬﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﻤﻭﺕ ﺃﻤﺎﻡ ﻋﻴﻨﻰ‬ ‫ﺠﺯﺀﺍ ﻓﺠﺯﺀﺍ ﺤﺘﻰ ﺍﻟﻨﻬﺎﻴﺔ.. ﻜﻨﺕ ﺃﺴﻴﺭ ﻭﺭﺍﺀ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻌﺵ ﻭﻜﺄﻥ ﻤﻐﻨﺎﻁﻴﺴﺎ ﻴﺸﺩﻨﻰ ﺇﻟﻴـﻪ.. ﻭﻓـﻰ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺫﻫﻭﻟﻰ ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺘﺘﺭﺍﺌﻰ ﻟﻌﻴﻨﻰ ﻤﺸﺎﻫﺩ ﻤﻥ ﺤﻴﺎﺘﻬﺎ:‬ ‫ﻫﺎ ﻫﻰ ﺘﻭﻗﻅﻨﻰ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺼﺒﺎﺡ ﻷﻟﺤـﻕ ﺒﻤﻭﻋـﺩ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻤﺤﺎﻀﺭﺓ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻜﻠﻴﺔ.. ﺜﻡ ﺃﻨﻅﺭ ﺇﻟﻴﻬﺎ ﺘﻌﺩ ﻟﻨـﺎ‬ ‫ﻤﺎﺌﺩﺓ ﺍﻟﻐﺫﺍﺀ.. ﺜﻡ ﺃﺴﻤﻊ ﺼﻭﺘﻬﺎ ﺘﻌﺎﺘﺒﻨﻰ ﻋﻠﻰ‬ ‫ﺇﻫﻤﺎل ﻤﻴﻌﺎﺩ ﺍﻟﺼﻼﺓ.. ﺜﻡ ﺍﺒﺘﺴﺎﻤﺘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺠﻤﻴﻠـﺔ‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻋﻠﻤﺕ ﺒﻨﺠﺎﺤﻰ ﻓـﻰ ﺍﻟﻠﻴﺴـﺎﻨﺱ.. ﺜـﻡ‬ ‫ﺍﺒﺘﺴﺎﻤﺘﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻤﺭﻴﺭﺓ ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻋﻠﻤـﺕ ﻷﻭل ﻤـﺭﺓ‬ ‫ﺒﺈﺼﺎﺒﺘﻬﺎ ﺒﺎﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ.. ﻫﺎ ﻫﻰ ﺘـﺯﻴﻥ ﺃﺨﺘـﻰ‬ ‫"ﺴﻤﺎﺀ "ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﺠﺎﺀ ﺯﻭﺠﻬﺎ ﻟﻴﺨﻁﺒﻬﺎ.. ﻴـﺎﻩ..‬
  • 112. ‫ﻜل ﻫﺫﺍ ﺍﻨﺘﻬﻰ.. ﻜل ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﻁﻴﺒـﺔ ﻭﺍﻟﺤﻨـﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﺭﺍﺤﺕ.. ﻭﺇﻟﻰ ﺍﻷﺒﺩ؟.. !‬ ‫ﻋﻨﺩﻤﺎ ﻜﺎﻨﻭﺍ ﻴﻨﺯﻟﻭﻨﻬﺎ ﻓﻰ ﺤﻔـﺭﺓ ﺍﻟﻘﺒـﺭ‬ ‫ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺍﻟﺩﻤﻭﻉ ﺘﺴﻴل ﻤﻥ ﻋﻴﻨﻰ.. ﺘﺴـﻴل ﺒـﻼ‬ ‫ﺍﻨﻘﻁﺎﻉ.. ﻭﻜﺄﻥ ﻴﻨﺒﻭﻉ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﺩﻤﻭﻉ ﻗﺩ ﺘﻔﺠـﺭ‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻋﻴﻨﻰ.. ﻜﺎﻨﺕ ﺃﻗـﺩﺍﻤﻰ ﺘـﺭﺘﻌﺵ ﻋﻠـﻰ‬ ‫ﱠ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺭﺽ ﻭﺠﺴﺩﻯ ﻴﻬﺘﺯ.. ﺠﻠﺴﺕ ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻷﺭﺽ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺘﺭﺍﺒﻴﺔ ﺒﻌﺩ ﺃﻥ ﻋﺠﺯﺕ ﺃﻗﺩﺍﻤﻰ ﻋﻥ ﺤﻤﻠـﻰ..‬ ‫ﻓﻰ ﻫﺫﻩ ﺍﻟﺤﻔﺭﺓ ﻟﻡ ﻴﺩﻓﻨﻭﻫﺎ ﻭﺤـﺩﻫﺎ.. ﺩﻓﻨـﻭﺍ‬ ‫ﻤﻌﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﻁﻔل ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﻤﺎﺕ ﺒﺩﺍﺨﻠﻰ.. ﻤـﺎﺕ ﺇﻟـﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻷﺒﺩ..‬ ‫ﻭﺃﻨﺎ ﻋﺎﺌﺩ ﻤﻥ ﺍﻟﻤﺩﻓﻥ ﻜﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻴﻠﺢ‬ ‫ﻋﻠﻰ ﺫﻫﻨﻰ.. ﺍﻟﻭﺤﺵ ﺍﻟﺫﻯ ﺍﺒﺘﻠﻊ ﺃﻤﻰ..‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻴﺭﻋﺒﻨﻰ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤـﻭﺩ.. ﻜـل‬ ‫ﺼﻭﺭﻩ ﻭﺘﺠﻠﻴﺎﺘﻪ ﺘﺭﻋﺒﻨﻰ.. ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻟﻴﺱ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺩﺍﺨﻠﻨﺎ ﻓﺤﺴـﺏ.. ﻭﻟﻜﻨـﻪ ﺤﻭﻟﻨـﺎ ﺃﻴﻀـﺎ..‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻴﺤﺎﺼﺭﻨﺎ.. ﺤﻴﺜﻤﺎ ﺃﺘﻠﻔـﺕ ﺃﺠـﺩﻩ.. ﻴﻜﺒـﺭ..‬ ‫ﻴـﺘﻤﻜﻥ.. ﻴـﻨﻬﺵ.. ﻴﺘﺨـﺫ ﺁﻻﻑ ﺍﻟﺼـﻭﺭ‬
  • 113. ‫ﻭﺍﻟﺘﺠﻠﻴﺎﺕ.. ﻜل ﺨﻠل ﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ.. ﻜـل ﻓﺴـﺎﺩ‬ ‫ﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ.. ﻋﻠﻰ ﺍﻟﺤﺩﻭﺩ ﺍﻟﺸﺭﻗﻴﺔ ﻟﺒﻼﺩﻨﺎ ﺘﻘـﻑ‬ ‫ﺩﻭﻟﺔ ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺘﻬﺩﺩ ﺒﺎﺒﺘﻼﻋﻨﺎ.. ﺍﻟﻘﺎﻫﺭﺓ ﺃﻴﻀﺎ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﺘﺘﺭﻨﺢ ﻤـﻥ ﺴـﺭﻁﺎﻨﻬﺎ ﺍﻟﺨـﺎﺹ.. ﺍﻟﻌﺩﺍﻟـﺔ‬ ‫ﺘﺘﺴﺭﻁﻥ.. ﻴﺤﻤل ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﺍﻟﺴـﻼﺡ ﻭﻴﻘﺘـل‬ ‫ﺒﺎﺴﻡ ﺍﻟﺩﻴﻥ.. ﻭﻴﺘﻨﻜـﺭ ﺃﺤﻴﺎﻨـﺎ ﻓـﻰ ﺠﺭﻋـﺔ‬ ‫ﹰ‬ ‫ﻫﻴﺭﻭﻴﻥ.. ﺍﻟﺴﺭﻁﺎﻥ ﻴﻀﺭﺏ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﻤﺴﺘﺸﻔﻴﺎﺕ‬ ‫ﻭﺍﻟﻤﺅﺴﺴﺎﺕ ﺍﻟﺼﺤﻴﺔ.. ﻴﻁل ﻋﻠﻴﻨﺎ ﻤﻥ ﺸﺎﺸﺔ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﺴﻴﻨﻤﺎ.. ﻨﺴﻤﻊ ﺼﻭﺘﻪ ﻤﻥ ﺨﻼل ﺍﻷﻏـﺎﻨﻰ..‬ ‫ﻨﻁﺎﻟﻌﻪ ﻓﻰ ﺍﻟﺼﺤﻑ ﻭﺍﻟﻜﺘـﺏ.. ﺍﻟﺴـﺭﻁﺎﻥ‬ ‫ﻴﺤﺎﺼﺭﻨﺎ ﻴﺎ ﻤﺤﻤﻭﺩ.. ﻴﺨﻨﻘﻨﺎ.. ﻭﺴﻴﻠﺘﻬﻤﻨﺎ ﻓﻰ‬ ‫ﺍﻟﻨﻬﺎﻴﺔ . . . . . . . . .‬