Is there a Santa Claus


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A supposedly Scientific examination for the existence of Santa Claus.

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Is there a Santa Claus

  1. 1. Creative Youth Ideas Is There a Santa Claus? A supposedly Scientificexamination for the existence of Santa Claus.
  2. 2. As a result of anoverwhelming lack ofrequests, and withresearch help from thatrenown scientific journalSPY magazine (January,1990) - I am pleased topresent the annualscientific inquiry intoSanta
  3. 3. 1) No known species ofreindeer can fly. BUTthere are 300,000 speciesof living organisms yet tobe classified, and whilemost of these are insectsand germs, this does notCOMPLETELY rule outflying reindeer which onlySanta has ever
  4. 4. 2) There are 2 billion children(persons under 18) in the world.BUT since Santa doesnt (appear)to handle the Muslim, Hindu,Jewish and Buddhist children, thatreduces the workload to 15% ofthe total - 378 million accordingto Population Reference Bureau.At an average (census) rate of 3.5children per household, thats91.8 million homes. Onepresumes theres at least onegood child in each.
  5. 5. 3) Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to workwith, thanks to the different time zones andthe rotation of the earth, assuming he travelseast to west (which seems logical). This worksout to 822.6 visits per second. This is to saythat for each Christian household with goodchildren, Santa has 1/1000th of a second topark, hop out of the sleigh, jump down thechimney, fill the stockings, distribute theremaining presents under the tree, eatwhatever snacks have been left, get back upthe chimney, get back into the sleigh and moveon to the next house. Assuming that each ofthese 91.8 million stops are evenly distributedaround the earth (which, of course, we knowto be false but for the purposes of ourcalculations we will accept), we are nowtalking about .78 miles per household, a totaltrip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stopsto do what most of us must do at least onceevery 31 hours, plus feeding and etc.
  6. 6. This means that Santas sleighis moving at 650 miles persecond, 3,000 times thespeed of sound. For purposesof comparison, the fastestman-made vehicle on earth,the Ulysses space probe,moves at a poky 27.4 milesper second - a conventionalreindeer can run, tops, 15miles per
  7. 7. 4) The payload on the sleigh adds anotherinteresting element. Assuming that eachchild gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh iscarrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa,who is invariably described as overweight.On land, conventional reindeer can pull nomore than 300 pounds. Even granting that"flying reindeer" (see point #1) could pullTEN TIMES the normal anount, we cannotdo the job with eight, or even nine. Weneed 214,200 reindeer. This increases thepayload - not even counting the weight ofthe sleigh - to 353,430 tons. Again, forcomparison - this is four times the weightof the Queen
  8. 8. 5) 353,000 tons travelling at 650 miles persecond creates enourmous air resistance - thiswill heat the reindeer up in the same fashionas spacecrafts re-entering the earthsatmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer willabsorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Persecond. Each. In short, they will burst intoflame almost instantaneously, exposing thereindeer behind them, and create deafeningsonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeerteam will be vaporized within 4.26thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile,will be subjected to centrifugal forces17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim)would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by4,315,015 pounds of
  9. 9. In conclusion - IfSanta ever DIDdeliver presents onChristmas Eve, hesdead
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