MODULE 2

MANAGING STRESS
       &
   OBSTACLES



    Nehemiah on the completion of Jerusalem’s
    walls in the face of ...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES




               BB LIFE SKILLS WORKBOOK



       MODULE 2: MANAGING STRESS & ...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES



               Identifying ANXIETY and FEAR


 Check the statements that desc...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES



                               Noticing ANGER

    Check the pointers which y...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES


                   Empowering Yourself With
                       Self-Awarene...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES


                   An example of the ABCD Model

                Two possible w...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES


                     Applying the ABCD Model
  Changing your beliefs will influ...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES



                   ABCD Model Worksheet


                     Negative Mindse...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES


                  FACING YOUR OBSTACLES
                “I gain strength, coura...
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES




                                           10
MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES


    OVERCOMING OBSTACLES IN YOUR LIFE :

  Case Study
  Samuel often wonders ab...
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Module 2 V3

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Module 2 V3

  1. 1. MODULE 2 MANAGING STRESS & OBSTACLES Nehemiah on the completion of Jerusalem’s walls in the face of obstacles and threats: “So the wall was completed on the twenty-fifth of Elul, in fifty-two days. When all our enemies heard about this, all the surrounding nations were afraid and lost their self-confidence, because they realised that this work had been done with the help of our God.” Nehemiah 6:15-16
  2. 2. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES BB LIFE SKILLS WORKBOOK MODULE 2: MANAGING STRESS & OBSTACLES “So the wall was completed on the twenty-fifth of Elul, in fifty-two days. When all our enemies heard about this, all the surrounding nations were afraid and lost their self-confidence, because they realised that this work had been done with the help of our God.” Nehemiah 6:15-16 Objectives  You will learn to identify your core obstacles in life.  You will understand that overcoming any negative emotions will empower you.  You will understand what motivates you.  You will learn how to face your their fears. Learning Outcomes At the end of the session, Boys you will: 1. Learn how to identify the core of an issue and deal with it, rather than livinge in the past or with anxiety or fear. 2. Be able to apply the ABCD model to deal with their your fears. 2
  3. 3. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES Identifying ANXIETY and FEAR  Check the statements that describe how you feel right now.  You feel anxious about going to school.,  You have difficulty doing your school work.  You feel negative about almost everything and nothing seems to work for you.  You do not want to mix with friends or meet new people.  You’ve lost your appetite.  You feel stressed and uptight most of the time.  You feel really scared about the future.  You feel like nobody understands you.  You spend hours in your room alone, thinking and worrying.  You constantly worry about things which you cannot control or influence (for example, starving children, world hunger, nuclear war). One-to-One Sharing: Share with a friend someone a situation in your life wheren you feel you were anxious and afraid. 3
  4. 4. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES Noticing ANGER Check the pointers which you feel are appropriate will help for you deal with your when you are angryer.  Reflect and identify the reasons for why you are feeling angry.  Write down how you feel in detail ands the reasons with yourself why you feel the way you do.  Talk to the person face-to-face about your feelings, in private.  If the other person gets angry in return, focus the discussion try to stay on with your feelings and do not broaden the discussions to other issues from the past.  Use the energy from your anger to and do something positive and constructive to remove yourself from the angry emotions (for example, going for a run or play some games). This will help to dissipate the angry emotions.  Do not let the angry scene keeps replaying itself in your mind as it will make you revengeful.  Do not justify your actions to anyone else. This is not helpful. Leave others out of the quarrel. as iIncluding them couldan result in division and disunity., as Iit forces your common friends to take sides.  Let go when it is over. If you have expressed ityour feelings and spoken honestly, there is nothing else you can do. You should not harbour resentment or guilt, and as you should consider the case closed. Here are two basic ground rules for expressing your anger:  Do not use your hands (or any verbal abuse or physical violence) as this is a clear sign that you have lost control of yourself and the situation.  Make sure you do not regret your words or actions. This allows you to feel good about yourself afterwards. 4
  5. 5. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES Empowering Yourself With Self-Awareness The ABCD Model In order to make changes in your life, you need to realize that it is your beliefs that have a significant impact on your actions. Using the ABCD model below, you will be able to change yourany negative mindset and eventually change your actions or reactions. ABCD Model What it means The factors that What causes theyour Activating Events feelings/emotions to arise?. This helps you to know Wwhat triggers your feelings?. The mental state at the time of processing the event. Beliefs This helps you to know the ‘why’ of your actions. The feelings created by myyour beliefs Consequential feelings The actions Iyou tooake because of myour Decisive Actions feelings/emotions. 5
  6. 6. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES An example of the ABCD Model Two possible ways to a situation: Negative Mindset Positive Mindset Activating Events I was not promoted I was not promoted People think I’m not There are some areas Beliefs good enough I may improve upon. Consequential I’m very angry I feel the need to feelings improve I ask my officers how Decisive Actions I quit I may improve 6
  7. 7. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES Applying the ABCD Model Changing your beliefs will influence your decisive behaviour Using the ABCD model, discuss with your group the following case scenario : Teck Ming does not really enjoy outdoor activities. The feeling gets worste when the Company goes on expeditions or conducts rappelling or Omega Descent activities. He hates expeditions for many reasons: the bugs, the heavy backpack and the long, endless plodding. But these are tolerable when compared to activities involving height. Teck Ming has a fear of heights. He still clearly remembers the rapid beating of his heart and the growing fear he felt when he looked down from the third floor during the Omega Descent in his recruits’ training camp. In fact, that gnawing feeling had begun when he saw the Officers setting up the apparatus. He didn’t really care that the Officers assured him that it iwas safe. Up to this day, he cannot understand why Mr Soon, his Officer, shouted at him to leap. How can Teck Ming change his belief to improve his experience in the company? Using the ABCD model worksheet, write down the experiences of Teck Ming. Record the positive mindset that Teck Ming should harve to overcome his fear of heights. Remember: If you change your negative mindset, it will allow you to be free from the negative emotions that you have been holding on to. 7
  8. 8. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES ABCD Model Worksheet Negative Mindset Positive Mindset Activating Events Beliefs Consequential fFeelings Decisive Actions 8
  9. 9. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES FACING YOUR OBSTACLES “I gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which I must stop and look fear in the face.” - Eleanor Roosevelt Check the pointers that will help you deal with your obstacles or fears.  I look at the positive and focus on them instead of the negative.  I do not crowd my mind with everything I have to do. Instead I decide to do one thing at a time and be happy with it.  I talk to a friend whom I can trust about my feelings and fears.  I write in a journal about how you I feel.  I take up a hobby or sport that I enjoy to occupy my mind.  I get out into the fresh air and exercise. This allows my energy to flow in a positive way.  I make a list of all the problems I have and work out which are important and which are urgent. What other things you can do to help you deal with your obstacles? 9
  10. 10. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES 10
  11. 11. MODULE 2 : MANAGING STRESS AND OBSTACLES OVERCOMING OBSTACLES IN YOUR LIFE : Case Study Samuel often wonders about how good it will be if he could turn back time. He looks back at his Primary School days longingly, a time in his life when he even enjoyed going to school. Now, he feels he has to juggle schoolwork, CCA and hours of tuition. He also feels that going to BB gives him needless stress. The atmosphere is tense with too much shouting and negativity. The Officers on parade hardly seem like the friendly sort on Recruitment Day. Staying home on Saturdays doing nothing seems a far better option. Help Samuel analyze the problem with the following ABCD model worksheet. Remember: changing your beliefs will change your behaviour. Negative Mindset Positive Mindset Activating Events Beliefs Consequential Ffeelings Decisive Actions 11

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