9 people you must remove from your inner circle
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9 people you must remove from your inner circle Document Transcript

  • 1. Entrepreneurship Ref: 01249 People You Must Remove From YourInner CircleBy Jeff Haden | October 15, 2012When youre trying to get a business off the ground, the people you surroundyourself with matter. Keep these nine types at a distance.You are what you eat, and you definitely are whom you associate with. The peopleclosest to you make all the difference--in a good and a bad way.Of course, it can be tough to find great new connections and friends to add to yourinner circle; people who will support you, help you, and encourage, motivate, andinspire you.Its a lot easier to spot the people in your inner circle who are holding you back.If you have people like these in your inner circle, remove them:Devilish AdvocatesDevilish advocates are rarely advocates for anything other than their own egos andpoints of view. "Perspective" is often just bragging in disguise. "Voice of reason" isoften just the voice of ego or the voice of a person who tried and failed and thereforethinks no one can--or more likely should--ever succeed. For further information on this handout and the consulting and coaching programs available please contact: Page 1 of 4 Image Group International Asia Pacific Head Office T: (+61 3) 9824 0420 E: info@imagegroup.com.au www.imagegroup.com.au ©2012
  • 2. Keep the people who ask smart questions, share lessons learned and ways to dothings differently, and offer to help you if a problem does pop up.Get rid of the people who always forecast doom and gloom based solely on their badexperiences. Your results may vary because you arent them.And you dont need them.Raving FansOn the other end of the spectrum is the person who thinks your every thought anddeed is astounding, amazing, incredible. Youre Michael Scott and hes DwightSchrute (well, most of the time).Unconditional praise is fun but rarely helpful. None of us are that smart, thatinsightful, or that talented. Often we do get it wrong. Often we do make mistakes.But often we dont realize it until someone tells us.Its easy to tell someone he or she is great. Its much, much harder--it takes a realfriend--to tell someone he or she can do better.Hype is the enemy of improvement. Be nice to raving fans, but dont pay muchattention to what they say.Let your mom be the only raving fan you need.Inside ScoopersIts hard to resist inside information and gossip. Finding out the reasons behindsomeones decisions, the motivations behind someones actions, the inside scoopabout someones hidden agenda--jeez, that stuff is hard to resist.The problem is, the person who gives you the inside scoop on other people is alsogiving other people the inside scoop on you.The people you want in your inner circle are willing to share the inside scoop on onlytheir own thoughts or feelings--thats not gossip, thats just truth.BackstabbersThe people in your inside circle should have one anothers backs. For further information on this handout and the consulting and coaching programs available please contact: Page 2 of 4 Image Group International Asia Pacific Head Office T: (+61 3) 9824 0420 E: info@imagegroup.com.au www.imagegroup.com.au ©2012
  • 3. Backstabbers have no ones back but their own.GeocentristsBefore Copernicus, most people thought Earth was at the center of the solar system.Too bad there hasnt been a Copernicus for people who think everything revolvesaround them.Self-interest is good. Enlightened self-interest is better. Self-centered just sucks tobe around.So dont be a Galileo and try to change their minds. Just move on. Its easy.They wont even notice youre gone.Roadblock ProphetsThe seer of all roadblocks has the uncanny ability to foresee a long list of potentialbarriers and problems that in reality will not appear and sometimes even cannotappear.Granted, none of us want to make a mistake we could have avoided. But whensomeone always counters every single idea with a never-ending list of reasons it justwont work, then he or she needs to go, because unreasonable doubt is the enemyof achievement.If my idea truly wont work, I definitely want to know. Tell me, tell me why, and thentell me what might work instead. Then youre helping. Then we can go placestogether.Otherwise, we should just go our separate ways.SchmoozersBuilding connections is important. But networking isnt a numbers game.Connections arent an end; connections are just a beginning.Too many beginnings means lots of starts and no finishes. Theres no way to buildmeaningful connections with dozens or hundreds of people.Be nice, but otherwise keep the schmoozer outside your inner circle. He cares justabout making connections.He doesnt actually want to connect. For further information on this handout and the consulting and coaching programs available please contact: Page 3 of 4 Image Group International Asia Pacific Head Office T: (+61 3) 9824 0420 E: info@imagegroup.com.au www.imagegroup.com.au ©2012
  • 4. Maintenance SchedulersIt makes sense: You need to service some equipment regularly so it doesnt fallapart.What doesnt make sense is when you need to "service" some personal andprofessional relationships or they fall apart: They need regular check-ins. They needregular contact so they can feel reassured that you still "care." When they dont getserviced, they make you feel youve somehow let them down.In short, theyre needy.Real professional relationships are based on only one kind of need: The people youtruly want in your inner circle are there when you really need them--just like you arefor them.The Walking Dead*Some people just drift like zombies. They wander aimlessly from task to task, fromday to day and year to year with no plan, no purpose, no goal.Surround yourself with people who have ambitious plans, meaningful purposes, andbig goals. Even if their goals are different from yours--and they probably will be--youll feed off their energy, and theyll feed off yours.And stay away from the walking dead. They wont kill you, but theyll definitely killyour motivation and enthusiasm. For further information on this handout and the consulting and coaching programs available please contact: Page 4 of 4 Image Group International Asia Pacific Head Office T: (+61 3) 9824 0420 E: info@imagegroup.com.au www.imagegroup.com.au ©2012