Learning domestic discipline

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  • I think that, in order to comment on the aspect of 'eroticism' involved in domestic discipline, you need to understand exactly what is *meant by* 'eroticism'. In fact, it has zero to do with any notion of 'Were going to have sex with some erotic spankings thrown in there to help you get your attitude fixed' and, should a couple decide to engage in such an activity, they would not call it 'domestic discipline', but by its correct name of 'erotic role play'.

    A very little basic and fundamental exploration and discussion with the thousands of couples who actually practise DD in their everyday lives will give a much more accurate picture of what is actually a small element of eroticism that can occur as a *natural* (not planned) component of what amounts to an intimate transaction between two loving consenting adults. Whereas, no matter how long you search for it, you will not find an instance in which a genuine DD couple substitutes an instance of erotic role play and calls it 'domestic discipline', you will find many, many cases in which a couple who has utilised the tool of DD to overcome the effects of an infraction which has caused a barrier between them and has effectively dealt with this and put it behind them feel a heightened mutual love and togetherness after the conclusion of the discipline, which, in some cases *may* translate itself into lovemaking.

    This is vastly different from the myth that the actual discipline spanking is 'fun', 'sexy' or pleasurable or is given with that deliberate purpose in mind and, if you simply ask the persons being punished in this way, you will find that to them it does not in any way resemble the sexual game you describe below and that there is no 'enjoyment' involved. On the contrary, the reason it works is because it is *not* enjoyable.

    When it comes to the sexual 'reconnection' experienced by *some* couples AFTER the punishment and at the point where the infraction has been dealt with and put firmly in the past, this is an added bonus to the loving relationship of the couple concerned and should be not be denied lest it has the effect of continuing and adding to a punishment that is supposed to be over. In fact, if is not accepted for the natural progression it is, there is a very high risk that entire point and purpose of DD will be lost and the couple will be left with the same problems of lingering resentment, unhappiness and disconnection that exist in many 'vanilla' marriages.
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  • 1. Learning Domestic Discipline
  • 2.  Some couples enjoy erotic spankings, and some of the couples that enjoy erotic spankings misunderstood my statement above. "Im upset with your attitude today, honey. Were going to have sex with some erotic spankings thrown in there to help you get your attitude fixed," sounds pretty absurd to me. This is NOT a "fun", "exciting", or "sexual" activity to be done whenever you feel like it. Spankings (under a discipline sense) are not fun, exciting or sexual. If you do find spankings to be those things, then information about erotic spankings is what youre looking for.
  • 3.  Weve established erotic spankings will not be discussed on this discipline presentation since they have nothing to do with Domestic Discipline. One commenter asked if I felt discipline spankings and erotic spankings could not co-exist in a marriage, and later went on to ask if I felt they could not work together. This comment/question confused me some, since I feel it was asking two different questions. Do I feel discipline spankings and erotic spankings can co-exist in a marriage? Of course they can.
  • 4.  A couple that practices Domestic Discipline can include erotic spankings in their sex life. What they do during intimate times is their business. Absolutely discipline spankings and erotic spankings can co-exist in a marriage.
  • 5.  Do I feel discipline spankings and erotic spankings can work together? No, I do not. Going back to the point I made earlier, one cannot correct a behavior by having sex. When sex gets mixed in with discipline, it confuses the brain. Literally. One begins associating discipline with sex, and it causes increased problems in behavior.
  • 6.  In a discipline instance, people associate poor behavior with subsequent discipline. If sex gets involved in any way, one then associates discipline with sex. So, when sex and discipline get mixed together, the association then becomes poor behavior leads to subsequent sex. As general human nature, people enjoy sex. When this happens, future poor behaviors increase since the one acting out knows sex will follow (after the disciplinary action), which is something they enjoy.
  • 7.  Domestic discipline sex, ultimately, is reinforcing the poor behavior and thus will increase the likelihood of it repeating. Discipline spankings and erotic spankings CANNOT work together. That last paragraph was kind of confusing so Ill illustrate my point. Here is the thought process: Poor behavior --> Discipline --> Sex
  • 8.  Naturally, through the transitive property (If A = B and B = C, then A = C), this then becomes: Poor behavior --> Sex That cant happen unless you want to see an increase in poor behavior, which is essentially the exact opposite of what Domestic Discipline is intended to do. So, once again, discipline spankings and erotic spankings cannot work together. I understand spanking, even in a discipline sense, can be arousing. Im not arguing that point at all. It can be. But, after the little spiel I went on about how mixing sex with discipline is a no-no, I obviously highly recommend NOT mixing sex with discipline.
  • 9.  If this is difficult for you to do, change the way you spank. Start to spank over the underwear or light clothing rather than bare-bottomed. After the comforting, do something to take your mind off of sex. So how long after a spanking (a discipline spanking) should you wait to have sex? For best results, I recommend you wait until her buttocks feels 100% better. I understand why people were confused by what I said, and the difference between punishment spankings and erotic spankings.
  • 10.  They fall under the same category (spankings) but are two completely different things. Just like apples and oranges. Same category (fruit), different things. One last thing I want to say before I end this - Domestic Discipline is one ASPECT of a marriage. I think that covers everything I wanted to put within this entry. I hope it clarified, but maybe it didnt. I dont know. I talk a lot sometimes. Anyway, as always feel free to comment or ask questions in the comments section of the presentation.