Mirror, Mirror: Understanding Yourself and Your Career Development

Mirror, Mirror: Understanding Yourself and Your Career Development
Jessica Faye Carter
2009 Diversity Women’s Business Conference
Greensboro, NC
October 16, 2009

Overview
About Self-Reflection and Your Career
Mirrors & Fairy Tales
What’s In Your Mirror?
Self-Assessment Exercise
© 2009 Jessica Faye Carter. All Rights Reserved.

Self-Reflection and Your Career
We sometimes get in the way of our own success
We are each bringing our “selves” into the workplace
Culture (e.g., Eastern European, African-American, Latino/a, Asian, South Asian)
Geographic background
Value systems
Notions of right and wrong
Acceptable behavior
Everyone is bringing different “selves” into the workplace and it is your interaction with these different “selves” that impacts your career development
People hire, promote, and fire others in the workplace

“ Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?”
— The Queen in Snow White

Mirrors and Fairy Tales
In fairy tales/myths, the mirror or reflection provides insight into the personality traits and motivation of the characters
Snow White
We ask the mirror questions
Mirror speaks to us about ourselves
Mirror speaks to us about others
We repeatedly approach the mirror with the same questions (get caught in a loop)
Narcissus
The mirror/reflection can lead to too much self-involvement

What’s In Your Mirror?
Purpose of looking into the mirror is to get a clear picture of yourself
Challenge: unclear picture
Personal issues
insecurities, past experiences, unhappiness, kudos, beauty, success
Influenced by other points of view
Family, friends, significant others, society, spiritual advisors, etc.
Solution
Isolate other points of view and your own perspective and issues will emerge

Keys to Self-Reflection
Take it seriously and look carefully at yourself
Be careful of “blind spots”
Use feedback you’ve received from friends, family, even “frenemies”/enemies
Filter out other perspectives
It’s not about how others view you/your situation
Think carefully about your likes, dislikes, and things you are indifferent to
This is also for your protection
Keep self-reflective exercises to yourself
This is a personal exercise; it is important that you learn to trust and develop your own judgment

Behavioral Mapping
Match your personal challenges and issues with workplace behaviors that may be hindering your career (example below):
Workplace Behavior /Challenge Underlying Emotion Root Cause of Issue Incessant talker/chatter Needs to feel heard Family : Comes from a large family, didn’t get much attention Spreads increased amounts of gossip about others Seeks to divert attention away from self; uncomfortable in environment; feels powerless Personal : Doesn’t feel like she measures up to others in the workplace Frequent disagreements with supervisor Desire for power; wants ideas to be heard and acted upon Personal : Believes that everyone operates by the same value system

Sarah’s Dilemma
Sarah, 35, is the Director of Marketing at a well-known consumer products company. She has an MBA from Dartmouth and was featured in BrandWeek for one of her product launches. Most of her colleagues don’t realize that she is from a small mining town in West Virginia and the oldest of 6 children. One day, her supervisor calls her in and hints that while she is viewed as an up-and-comer by senior executives, some colleagues view her as a little too intense. You went to b-school with Sarah and know her background. At lunch one day, she asks you how she should handle this situation.
What is the primary perception issue that Sarah is facing?
What are some ways that Sarah can handle it?
What should Sarah avoid doing?
Is this situation likely to impact Sarah’s career? Why or why not?

“ I’m starting with the [wo]man in the mirror”
— From “Man in the Mirror” by Michael Jackson

Key Takeaways
Know yourself: strengths, weaknesses, things that you’re indifferent to
Be comfortable with yourself
Don’t be surprised when others misunderstand your behavior and motivations
Be prepared to defend yourself, but don’t go overboard or share personal information that can be used against you
Check in with yourself regularly
Be kind to yourself; making mistakes is part of life. Learn from them and move on.

Thank You.

Mirror, Mirror: Understanding Yourself and Your Career Development

by Jessica Faye Carter on Oct 18, 2009

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