How to lose a job?

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I delivered this lightening talk on 21st September in AIM Conference. It inspired people to "love" their jobs (pun intended).

I delivered this lightening talk on 21st September in AIM Conference. It inspired people to "love" their jobs (pun intended).

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  • 1. How to lose a job? Just Let MeBeer mug.jpg Go!!! September 21st, 2012 Disclaimer: All opinions expressed here are mine and does not reflect the Firm’s outlook in any case Gurpreet Singh
  • 2. The Prison Feeling - OfficePlease set me free from this Prison! How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 3. Activity #1 – Monday BluesA Report says: 33% people fall sick on Monday(s).. Lets see how! Nothing better than an Extended weekend – A Sick leave on Monday solves Monday Blues How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 4. Activity #2 – Punctuality Punctured Excuses Flat Tyre Maid got late RainsBe late -15 minutes daily! How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 5. Activity #3 – Conduct Toxic MeetingsSeatEatMeetCheat And Propose a new time for the next Meeting … How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 6. Activity #4 – Wife Vs Work Steps: Fight with Wife on the phone during the office hours Skip Office meetings and date your wife Honey, please book a movie ticket for Wife…! tomorrow and I will take a sick leave for the same How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 7. Activity #5 – Dress Codes The Dude!Bermudas + Slippers/ Crocs in office = Super Cool Look How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 8. Activity #6 – Seeking Conditional FeedbackAnd the condition is I expect only “Applause” in feedbacksessions, for all the mess-ups, I am already updatedupon! How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 9. Activity #7 – Cupid @ WorkLove is blind: It can happen at office as well. Plus, you gain attention as everybody talks about you (not for work) How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 10. Activity #8 – Obligation to Descend Go down in morals and fight with everybody in the team and Become an Angry bird How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 11. Activity #9 – Whats on your mind? If the firewall has allowed FB, we FB chat is better than should open FB FB at office is Office chat- lets use this to during the office fun! chat with each other hours Update your Facebook status before 100Likes checking the hand-overs for different projects A Hand-over can wait, a FB update can not! How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 12. Activity #10 – Multitasking Only Updates on Servers – No updates on my project!!!You are being on hold as Technical Updates are taking place on our Servers Client Employee How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 13. Activity #11 – Office GossipHe said, She said, They said … Blah Blah How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 14. Activity #12 – Keep My Secret! Jack, Buddy, I just got Wow! Super Cool!interviewed in ABC firm Don’t worry, I will keep your secret! By the way, what are they offering? No Secret keepers at office How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 15. Activity #13 – Misfiring Emails/Chats Misfiring emails/chats (containing Back biting ofcolleagues/Boss) to “wrong recipients” can be “lethal” How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 16. Activity #14 – (Over)Booze in Office Parties Free Liquor How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 17. Activity #14 – (Over)Booze in Office Parties Team Spirit(s) How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 18. Activity #14 – (Over)Booze in Office Parties Free-style dance (Bhangra with Salsa / Rum with Whisky) How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 19. Activity #15 – (Over)Booze in OfficeParties The Next day - Hangover How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 20. Activity #16 – Cover letter XeroxedIf your current Boss “catches” your Cover letter-printout for your “new” job, it would definitely make an impact How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 21. Activity #17 – Be the MonsterIf does not work: then find a girl in Monster.com whocan help you to get a new job How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 22. Mission Accomplished – You are Fired! I am FREEEEEEEEE NOW … How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 23. Even if you are not fired!It means that there is some one “Up” there who loves you ….Then find the someone, and Marry your Manager (high risks, high gains). How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |
  • 24. Gp.singh.tech@gmail.com How to lose a job? >> AIM 2012 |