Drevelyn matilda minor gift to our global children
Table of Contents
At Home .............................................................................................. 3
At School .............................................................................................. 5
Restaurant Manners ...................................................................... 6
Social Etiquette Celebrations...................................................... 7
National Anthem ............................................................................. 9
Table Graces ..................................................................................... 9
Familiar Graces ............................................................................... 9
Formal Dining ................................................................................ 10
Seven Course Meals ..................................................................... 14
Tea Party Etiquette ....................................................................... 17
Formal Dining ................................................................................ 23
Healthy Eating ............................................................................... 25
How to Eat To Live........................................................................ 26
Fun Food Facts .............................................................................. 28
Telephone Etiquette ..................................................................... 30
Cell Phone Etiquette..................................................................... 31
Email Etiquette .............................................................................. 32
Your Child’s School ...................................................................... 34
University/College ........................................................................ 36
High Expectations and Enrollment Tips ............................... 36
Fashion Tips for Women............................................................. 38
Fashion & Accessory Tips .......................................................... 38
Professional Attire......................................................................... 44
Business Casual Attire for Women ......................................... 44
Personal Grooming ....................................................................... 46
Business Attire for Men .............................................................. 47
Business Casual Attire for Men ............................................... 48
Resumé Writing Tips .................................................................... 51
Sample Job Application .............................................................. 53
Personal Check List...................................................................... 56
Job Interview Tips......................................................................... 57
Introductions Handshaking/Conversation Tips............... 59
What to Talk About ...................................................................... 61
Communication Barriers ............................................................ 62
Choices We Make .......................................................................... 63
Tough Subjects .............................................................................. 65
Alcohol ~ Drugs ~ Smoking ............................................... 65
Choices and Consequences ....................................................... 66
Achieving Your Goals................................................................... 67
Your Financial Budget................................................................. 68
Glossary ........................................................................................... 69
Introduction Character & Life
Skills should be taught from
early childhood through every
level in school. Grandparents
no longer live next door and
parents are working. Years
ago, African American
churches assisted parents in
teaching their children proper
social skills. But, we have
dropped the ball! Let’s pick up
the ball, take it to the
classrooms, and bring it back
into our churches.
I have written and self published several simple but powerful
books for parents and our children. My goal is to prepare
students and parents to live and work in a world that is highly
technical and diverse. They will have learned the Proper Social
Skills needed to interact in our diverse society. Students and
their parents will have learned how to combine social skills
with string educational practice.
The lessons in this guide book are designed to help you fit in
anywhere. After reading this book, you will enhance the social
skills you have already acquired. This book will increase your
social awareness, with very simple instructions. Learning social
skills is the key to being able to express acceptable behavior.
Education is the key to success in life. Etiquette is basically
good manners! The best etiquette is based on “The Golden
Rule,” that is, treat others as you want them to treat you.
etiquette. This creates an insecurity and reluctance to blend
with various societies.
My goal is to teach students a good set of healthy values,
respect for human life, and a respect for education and the
ability to excel in school. I also would like to have an impact on
increasing overall academic achievement; reducing the
placement of students in special education classes; reducing
suspensions and expulsions; reducing dropout rates for
students; increasing the graduation rate and college
attendance of students; increasing the rate of class attendance;
increasing parent, family and community involvement and
support; and increasing self-esteem and student achievement.
We all like to think that we have good manners or great social
skills. In reality, very few of us exercise these as a regular
habit. In fact, many of us interact in society without ever
having learned the proper social skills. As we deal with others
in our daily lives, it is not difficult to observe that many of us
ignore the most basic manners of social correctness. In order
to be self-motivated and to increase confidence and selfesteem, you need to be mentally and emotionally balanced.
One way to achieve this balance is by using good manners and
social grace (etiquette), and you will experience success in all
environments. Good manners and behavior define the caliber
of who we are regardless of our income, race, degree of formal
education, or career.
A person with good manners shows the world who he or she is,
including tastes, opinions, friends, quality of life, and selfrespect.
Drevelyn Matilda Minor,
While working for many years in the San Francisco Unified
School District, I found that the majority of students in public
private schools, junior colleges, and universities lack the
understanding, training, and experience of good social skills /
friends, co-workers, teachers, peers,
strangers, and virtually everyone
you come in contact with. The
greatest attributes of social
acceptance, is the ability to
A grandparent might reinforce what
your parents taught you during
your early years to ensure proper
behavior in your daily life.
Brush Your Teeth Twice a Day
Some important words to use in
your daily life are
First Teachers – Parents and
Grandparents can assist your
parents with your development of
great social skills. Remember, in
most cases they taught your
Bathe or Shower regularly.
Good morning – Greet family
members, house guests and anyone
you might come in contact with at
church, school, etc.
Apply the same rule to the afternoon
Good night -- Before going to bed
say “good night,” to family members
or any guest who might be visiting
Don’t forget to say your prayers
before going to bed.
The Golden Rule
“Do unto others, as you would
like others to do unto you.”
Everyone is to be treated with
respect and courtesy. This golden
rule applies to all family members,
Responsibilities at Home
pajamas, a robe
should have pajamas,
nightgowns, a robe and slippers.
Daywear: Place your clothing out
each night before you go to bed.
Arrange outfits by them together. Do
not place your clothing on the floor.
Housework: Volunteer to help your
parents around the house willingly
Yard Work: Help your parents with
yard work and take out the trash
Closing Doors: Hold the door
knob and shut it softly rather than
letting it slam shut.
Meal Times: Volunteer on special
occasions to help parents and
grandparents prepare the meals. At
other times, offer to set the table or
do other things that might be
needed for a family meal.
Knock softly and ask permission
before entering other family
Laundry: Put your dirty
clothes in your laundry
basket or laundry bag.
Wash your dirty
laundry and put away
your clean clothes in drawers or on
If you need extra help with math,
reading, science or any other
subject, ask your teachers for
information on after-school tutorial
sites and Saturday schools.
Be On Time for Your Class!
Also, ask about after-school and
tutorial programs at your place of
Classmate Party Invitations
Student Questions in Class
This is the first sign of good
If you are sick and unable to attend
school, have your parent or guardian
contact the school secretary first
thing in the morning.
But if you’re late to class, enter the
classroom quietly and gently close
the door. Be considerate of other
students and the teacher.
you have a question,
raise your hand and wait
for the teacher to call
Don’t place your feet
on the furniture at
school or at home.
Home Work Assignments
and turn it in
on time. You can do your
homework during free
time at school, on the bus, in the car
or at home.
You must follow
the school’s policy
invitations. If you
pass your invitations
out at school, it is polite
to invite all of your classmates. (If
you exclude some of your
classmates, some students’ feelings
might be hurt.)
If you ONLY want to invite a small
group from your class, (Girls Only
“or” Boys Only) give them the
invitations after school, or have your
parents mail an invitation to their
You can also contact them by phone
to invite them.
After playing a sport or a game,
congratulate the other players on
their playing ability and let them
know that you enjoyed playing with
Good Sportsmanship is considered
fitting for playing or
watching sports. This
includes observing the
rules of fair play, respect
for others, and being
gracious in losing.
Twelve Dining Tips for Parents
It is never too early to start teaching
good restaurant manners to
children. Poorly behaved children
can ruin the dining experience for
other patrons, so if you bring your
child to dine out, make sure they are
1. Use a fork unless eating finger
2. Do not stuff your mouth full of
food because it doesn’t look
good and because you could
3. Chew with your mouth closed.
No one should see food chewed
up or to have to listen to it
being chewed. This means no
talking with your mouth full.
4. Eat slowly. Wait a few seconds
before getting another fork full.
5. Do not reach over someone’s
plate for any other item on the
table. Ask someone to pass the
item to you.
6. Do not make any rude
comments about any food
served in the restaurant. It will
hurt someone’s feelings.
7. Always say “Thank You” when
8. For buffet style meals – wait
until everyone is served before
starting to eat.
9. Break off a small piece of your
dinner roll before buttering it.
10. Do not pick anything out of
your teeth at the table. If it
bothers you, excuse yourself
and go to the restroom.
Use a napkin to “dab”
your mouth. The napkin
should be on your lap when
not in use.
12. Do not wipe or blow your nose
with your napkin.
Public Dining with Friends
Do not send a dish
back unless it is
really inedible--not just because you
changed your mind. When leaving
the table, put your chair under the
Do not drum your fingers on the table,
pick your teeth, comb your hair, or
polish your nails.
House of Worship
A request to bow your head is asked
of you most of the time for a moment
of prayer, for an invocation, or for
the benediction at a house of
worship or at large gatherings.
Whether or not you believe in God,
bow your head and remain silent for
the duration of the prayer.
an important and
joyful tradition for families. However,
you should find other activities for
children who are too young to sit
comfortably, quietly and still
throughout the services, thus
respecting the house of worship, the
clergy, and the other attendees.
Never chew gum, do not smack,
rattle gum or candy wrappers, or
talk loudly while visiting or sitting
next to people at the theater, at a
concert, or in a house of worship. Be
considerate of the performers and
Treat books with
mark in them
Who gets on or off an elevator
first? The person who reaches
the elevator first or is closest
to the door – regardless of
gender, enters or exits the
neighbors to your
Always ask for
or playing in a
or on your neighbor’s property.
Trash the Trash - Keep your
city beautiful by using
the public trash can.
Always place your
trash in a trash can
(not on city streets).
Keep your feet out of the public
passageway, so you will not trip
people. Say, “Excuse me” or “pardon
me” when trying to go passed
another person. Always offer your
seat to elders and people with a
disability. If someone near you drops
something, pick it up and hand it
over to him or her.
Hats or Caps
Sneezing in Public
Men and boys should remove their
hats or caps when entering all
When you sneeze or
cough, cover your
nose and mouth
with a soft tissue or handkerchief,
using your left hand. This will leave
your right hand clean for hand
shaking, opening doors, etc.
After sneezing it is polite and
appropriate to excuse yourself, just
by saying, “Excuse me,” to the
person next to you
after coughing or sneezing in both
social and professional situations.
When you have a cold or the flu, you
should also wash your hands often
or carry a small bottle of hand
Never spit in public!
Do not cheat in
If you have 14 items in your
shopping cart, and the supermarket
is packed, you should not race to the
10 items express lane.
When the National Anthem is played,
you must stand up and sing. Men
and boys should remove their hats.
There are four verses to the anthem,
but it is the first verse that is usually
sung. There are also state songs for
each of the fifty states as well.
National Anthem Lyrics
Oh, say can
you see by the dawn’s early light
what so proudly we hailed at the
twilight’s last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars
thru the perilous fight, o’er the
ramparts we watched were so
gallantly streaming? And the rocket’s
red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
gave proof thru the night that our flag
was still there Oh, say does that Star
Spangled Banner yet wave o’er the
land of the free and the home of the
The lyrics to the Star Spangled
Banner were written by Francis Scott
Key, and the music by John Stafford
Smith. A Congressional resolution
made it the National Anthem in
Many households observe the tradition of
pausing before a meal to give thanks for
the food on their table and other good
things in their lives. Grace should be said
first and nothing should be touched on
the table beforehand not even the water
glasses or the napkins.
Simple Guest Grace
O Lord, forgive us our sins and bless
these refreshments in Christ’s name.
O Lord, we pray thy blessings,
upon this food and upon our souls.
Guide us through life and save us
Blessing for a Christian Home
In Christian homes the father or mother
usually says grace, although
occasionally a child is asked to say it.
Family grace is said either with everyone
standing or with everyone seated with
Our Father in Heaven, for this meal
you have given we want to say thank
you from our hearts. Bless the ones who
prepared it and Lord as we share it will
you stay with us and be our guest of
Thank you, Lord, for this food which
is set before us. May we use it to
nourish our bodies, and thee to nourish
our souls? Make us ever more mindful
of the needs of others, and the needs of
our planet. Through Christ Our Lord,
by his hands, we are fed
Let us thank him for our bread
you for the world so sweet,
you for the food we eat,
you for the birds that sing,
you, God, for everything.
Give us grateful hearts, O Father, for all
thy mercies, and make us mindful of the
needs of others, through Jesus Christ
our Lord. Amen.
Bless us O Lord, and these Thy gifts,
which we are about to receive from Thy
bounty, through Christ Our Lord.
Around this happy table may no evil
ever come, let health, peace and
happiness make up our daily sum.
Children treat grace as an opportunity to
talk about their concerns. It gives us all a
chance to show how we can
communicate with God.
God is great, God is good
Let us thank him for our food
Table manners play an important part in
making a favorable impression. Our manners
can speak volumes about us as
Serve all beverages from the
If, after looking over the dinner
menu, there are items you are
uncertain about, ask questions
about them. It is better to find out
what is in the dish before you start
placing it on your plate. It could be
something you do not like or to
which you are allergic. Avoid
spending the entire meal picking
tentatively at your food.
First Person Served
The host serves the guest of honor
(Fe-male) first and then proceeds
counter clockwise around the table.
Last Person Served
She serves her husband next to last
and herself last.
When should children begin
eating? Children eating alone with
their parents should wait until their
parents begin eating before picking
up their soupspoon or fork.
Serve and remove all dishes from the
Passing Food at the Table
Food should be passed to the right,
or counter clockwise. If you need
something that you cannot reach
easily, politely ask the person closest
to the item you need to pass it to
you. For example, “After you’ve used
them yourself, would you please
pass me the salt and pepper?”
Engage in table conversation that is
pleasant but entirely free of controversial
Proper Table Posture
Seasoning Your Food
Do not season your
food before you have
tasted it! The host /chef will be
offended by your actions – especially
if you have not tasted the dish.
Bread or Rolls
Eat rolls or bread by tearing off
small bite size pieces and buttering
only the piece you are preparing to
eat. When ready for another piece,
repeat the same process.
Hunching - Never HUNCH over your
dinner plate! Proper posture at the table is
very important. Sit up straight, with your
arms held near your body. You should
neither lean on the back of the chair nor
bend forward to place the elbows on the
table. Contrary to popular belief, elbows on
the table are acceptable between courses or
after everyone has finished eating.
It is permissible to lean forward slightly
every now and then and press the elbows
very lightly against the edge of the table, if it
is obvious that you are not using them for
Dip the spoon into the soup, moving
away from the body, until
it is about two
thirds full. Sip
the liquid from
the side of the
Do not slurp soup from a spoon.
Spoon the soup away from you when
you take it out of the bowl and sip it
from the side of the spoon. If your
soup is too hot, let it sit until it
cools; do not blow on it.
Do not chew your food with your
mouth open or make loud noises
while you are eating. Although it is
possible to talk with a small piece of
food in your mouth, do not talk with
your mouth filled with food.
Removing Bad Tasting Food
Never spit a piece of bad food or
tough gristle into your napkin!
Remove the food from your mouth
using the same utensil you used to
place it in your mouth. Place the
piece of food on the edge of your
plate. If possible, cover it.
silverware and place it on the edge of
Food Caught Between Teeth
If food is caught between your teeth
and you cannot remove it with your
tongue, leave the table and go to the
restroom where you can remove the
food from your teeth.
Leaving the Table
You should not leave the table
during the meal except in an
emergency! Simply excuse yourself
from the table if you must go to the
bathroom or if you suddenly become
sick. Later you can apologize to the
host by saying that you did not feel
If you or someone you are dining
with is left-handed, it is best for the
left-handed person to sit at the left
end of the table or at the head of the
table. This arrangement helps
ensure that everyone has adequate
elbow room to eat comfortably.
Spilling Food off Your Plate
If food spills off your plate, you may
pick it up with a piece of your
Wipe your mouth with
your napkin after eating
off your plate. Do not
take a sip of any
beverage at the table until your
mouth is empty and wiped with your
napkin. You need to keep the rim of
your glass or cup free from food
Silverware & Napkin
Choosing the correct silverware from
the variety in front of you is not as
difficult as it may first appear.
Remember the rule to work from the
outside in, and you will be fine.
Work your way in, using one utensil
for each course. Starting with the
knife, fork, or spoon that is farthest
from your plate, if you skip the first
course, skip the first fork.
The salad fork is on your outermost
left, followed by your dinner fork.
Your soup spoon is on your
outermost right, followed by your
beverage spoon, salad knife and
Your dessert spoon and fork are
above your plate or brought out with
Use a knife and fork to cut and eat
your food. On your plate cut your
food by holding the knife in the right
hand and the fork in the left hand
with the fork tines piercing the food.
Cut a few bite-size pieces of food,
and then lay your knife across the
top edge of your plate with the sharp
edge of the knife blade facing you.
Change your fork from your left to
your right hand to eat, fork tines
facing up. If, you are left-handed,
keep your fork in your left hand,
tines facing up
If a piece of your silverware falls onto
the floor, pick it up if you can reach
it and simply and quietly request a
If you have to leave the
table temporarily, place your fork
over your knife in an inverted “V.”
This will let the server know you are
not quite finished with your meal.
Once you have used a piece of
silverware, never place it back on the
table. Leave unused silverware on
the table. Do not leave a used spoon
in a cup, either; place it in the
saucer. You can leave a soup spoon
in a soup bowl.
Place your napkin on your lap,
A large dinner napkin should be
folded in half after opening and
before placing on your lap.
Typically, you want to put your
napkin on your lap soon after sitting
down at the table (but follow your
The napkin remains on your lap
throughout the entire meal and is
used gently to blot your mouth when
If you need to leave the table during
the meal, fold your napkin and place
it back to the left hand side of your
The host will signal the end of the
meal by placing his or her napkin on
When you leave the table at the end
of the meal place your napkin loosely
next to your plate. (Do not refold
your napkin, but do not wad it up,
Do not leave your napkin on your
The Host is the Restaurant Greeter
who is in charge of the dining room.
The Wait Staff
The waitperson will serve your meal or
any selections from the menu.
Only in extreme cases should a tip
never be given. Poor Service:
inattentive – forgetful – rude –
Seven Course Meals
A small plate
replaces the service plate. The outer
utensils are used. The bread plate is
to the left with a butter spreader.
The more you communicate to the
waitperson, the better he or she will
be able to serve you. If you are
displeased with the dining
experience in any way, it is up to you
to calmly and politely articulate that
to the waitperson, host or manager
so they can have an opportunity to
fix the problem.
If you do not say anything and just
wait until the end of the meal to
leave a substandard tip, the
waitperson won’t know what went
15-20% of a check
Waitperson went to any length to
make you happy
If the appetizer is
seafood cocktail, a small fork is
placed to the right of the soup
spoon. The cocktail fork will be the
only fork that will ever be placed to
the right of the dinner plate.
After the appetizer,
comes the soup bowl, which is
placed on a service plate. Once you
finish your soup, the service plate,
soup bowl, soupspoon and sherry
glass will be removed.
dinner or entrée plate follows once
the server has removed the fishplate,
fish fork and knife. Normally, red
wine is served with this course.
In European dining, the salad
course is served last; Americans
normally serve this course after
the soup. Both the salad plate and
salad knife and fork are smaller than
the other utensils.
A coffee or tea
Coffee or Tea
cup and saucer is brought to the
table and coffee or tea is served once
dessert is served.
Except for the water and
champagne glass, each place setting
is completely cleared away from the
table. A dessert plate is normally
brought to the table; the dessert
spoon and fork are placed above the
main place setting.
Use for washing your fingertips
On the other hand, dessert can be
served with the finger bowl. A finger
bowl comes with an under plate and
doily. The bowl contains warm water
with a lemon slice. Once you have
washed your fingertips, the finger
bowl is placed to the left. The server
will remove the bowl then serve the
As a host,
If you are confirming for a breakfast,
you should do so the afternoon
If you are confirming for a dinner,
you should do so that morning
before the afternoon of the dinner.
Please arrive early and wait by the
door for your guests. If you are
seated, order water or a soft
beverage, but don’t begin eating the
If your guests are over 15-20
minutes late, you should call and tell
them that you are waiting. Wait five
or ten more minutes and then decide
whether you want to eat alone or
leave. If you leave, you should leave
a message with the restaurant host
and tip the waiter.
You can make menu suggestions to
your guests, and if they order an
appetizer or soup, do likewise.
You are responsible for initiating
business talk. If it is a breakfast
meal, keep social conversation to a
minimum. If it is a lunch meal, you
can converse until orders are taken,
but then get down to business. If it
is a dinner meal, business may or
may not be discussed. If
spouses/partners are included,
never talk business.
Do not make a big production about
the bill. It is best if you give your
credit card to the waitperson before
the meal so that the bill never comes
to the table.
Always phone in advance for a
reservation and be on time.
If you need to cancel your
reservation try to notify the
restaurant within 24 hours of your
If you are running late, let the
restaurant know of your late arrival.
Hopefully, they will be able to fit you
Gentlemen – it is appropriate to hold
the chair and seat the woman on
Always speak softly when eating out
and never snap your fingers at the
When the server is ready to take
your order, and you have not made a
decision about what to order, ask
the server to return in a few
If, after looking over the menu, there
are items you are uncertain about,
ask your server any questions you
may have. Answering your questions
is part of the server’s job. It is better
to find out before you order what is
in a dish. It could be something you
do not like or to which you are
allergic. You don’t want to spend the
entire meal picking at your food.
In a restaurant, women’s orders are
taken before the men’s.
An employer will generally suggest
that your order be taken first; his or
her order will be taken last.
As a guest, you should not order one
of the most expensive items on the
menu or more than two courses
unless your host indicates that it is
If the host says, “I’m going to try this
delicious sounding cheesecake; why
don’t you try dessert too,” or “The
prime rib is the specialty here” I
think you’d enjoy it, then it is all
right to order the item if you would
like it for your meal.
It is best to order food that can be
eaten with a fork and knife. Finger
foods can be messy and are best left
for informal dining.
It is inappropriate to ask for a doggy
bag when you are a guest. Save the
doggy bag for informal dining.
Do not order alcoholic beverages.
Drinking too much when dining out
is one of the most disliked behaviors.
Do not smoke while dining out.
When leaving the table, always say
excuse me to others at the table, fold
your napkin neatly and place it to
the left of your dinner plate.
If you do not want the
waitperson to remove your plate
from the table, place your knife and
fork in an inverted “V” on your
dinner plate. Place the fork over the
knife with the “Prongs” pointing
When you finish your meal place
the knife and fork parallel to one
another across your plate with the
knife blade facing inward toward
you. Your knife and fork should be
positioned at ten o’clock to four
Be on time. Call if you will be late.
Social Setting - it is always
appropriate for a male to stand when
a female is leaving the table.
Always be courteous and thank the
Business Setting – it is not always
necessary for a male to rise
whenever his female coworker(s)
leave the table.
Sharing Foods – Yes, it is
appropriate to share when others at
the table are also willing to share.
However, always request additional
small plates and clean utensils for
dividing the shared food.
When entertaining a guest for dinner
or cocktails, the person who
extended the invitation (regardless of
gender) is responsible for the bill.
Sneezing or Blowing Your Nose –
Excuse yourself from the table, and
do not use your napkin as a
Allow the host to lead and never fight
over the bill.
Keep your briefcase and/or purse off
VI. Thou shall not dawdle over
ordering or eating
VII. Thou shall not drink too much
VIII. Thou shall not fight over who
pays the bill.
IX. Thou shall not neglect thy table
X. Thou shall not forget to show
Ladies - always go to the bathroom
to apply your make-up or fix your
Never do it at the table.
Turn off your cellular phone during a
Tea Party Etiquette
Never correct others’ manners.
Ten Commandments for Business
I. Thou shall not jump straight
into business talk
II. Thou shall not be late
III. Thou shall not table hop
IV. Thou shall not talk policies,
diets, or about family
V. Thou shall not dominate the
If the host pours your cup half full
with tea – that is a sign that they
wish for you to stay a while longer. A
full cup of tea poured by the host
indicates a wish for you to leave.
There are three basic types of
Afternoon or Low Tea:
Cream Tea Tea, scones, jam
Light Tea Tea, scones and
scones, sweets and
In England, the traditional time
for tea was 4 or 5 o’clock and
no one stayed after 7 p.m. Most
tearooms today serve tea from 3
to 5 o’clock.
The menu has also changed
from tea, bread, butter and
cakes, to include three
particular courses served
specifically in this order:
Tiny sandwiches or
served with jam
and Devonshire or
Since it is a tea party, it is okay to
eat with fingers. However, if an item
is particularly messy (has a runny
filling), use a fork.
If all the courses are laid out on the
table, you should eat them in this
Scones or Muffins
Second: Tiny Sandwiches
Sweets – Pastries
Think of it like a meal where you can
start with bread, then have the main
course, but save the dessert for last.
For scones or muffins, break off a
bite-size piece, then put a small
amount of jam or butter on it. If
Devonshire or clotted cream is
available, a small amount can be
dabbed on after the jam. This thick
cream is for scones, not for the tea.
Take bites of the tiny sandwiches.
Never stuff the whole thing in your
mouth, even though it is small.
If using sugar, do not dip the sugar
tong or sugar spoon into your
teacup. (I recommend using sugar
Stir sugar and/or milk with your
teaspoon, and then place the
teaspoon on your saucer.
When drinking the tea, you can hold
the cup and saucer near your chest
then take the teacup off the saucer
and bring it up to your mouth to
If the tea is hot, do not blow on the
tea. Leave your teacup on the table
Messy Tea Bags
Hopefully, the tea will be served from
the teapot, rather than having
individual tea bags, which can get
very messy, especially with children.
When using tea bags at a tea party,
always have a small dish at your
place setting on which your guest
can place the used tea bag.
Tea Cup Etiquette
Pick up your cup and
saucer together holding the saucer
in one hand and cup in the other.
Hold the saucer under your cup
while you sip your tea (so you
don’t spill it or dribble).
The best way to hold a teacup is to
slip your index finger through the
handle, up to almost the first
knuckle, then balance and secure
the cup by placing your thumb on
the top of the handle and allowing
the bottom of the handle to rest on
your middle finger.
Pinky – Finger
handle - your pinky does not have
to be extended. (Contrary to
popular belief, the ring and pinkie
fingers should not be extended,
but should rest by curving gently
back toward your wrist.)
Stirring Your Tea When stirring
your tea, do not make clinking
noises by the sides of the cup
while stirring. Gently swish the tea
back and forth being careful not to
touch the sides of your cup if
possible. Never leave your spoon in
the cup and be sure not to sip your
tea from the spoon. After stirring,
place your spoon quietly on the
saucer, behind the cup, on the
right hand side under the handle.
Milk – Not Cream
some people pour their milk into the
cup first, it is probably better to pour
the milk in the tea after it is in the
cup in order to get the correct
Tea Party Menu
Lemon Slices–Not Wedges
When serving lemon with
tea, use lemon slices, not wedges.
Provide a small fork or lemon fork for
your guests or the tea server can
neatly place a slice in the teacup
after the tea has been poured. Be
sure never to add lemon with milk
since the lemon’s citric acid will
cause the proteins in the milk to
Tea Party Menu
Do not extend your
pinky out when
drinking tea. Just
hold the teacup
Hold the cup lightly, by the
Serve milk with tea. Please do not
use cream. Cream is too heavy and
masks the taste of the tea. Although
Muffins ~ Apricot and White
Chocolate Scones ~ Best Blueberry
Muffins ~ Cherry Scones ~ Date
Drop Scones ~ Orange Poppy Seed
Bread ~ Scones ~ Mincemeat Nut
Bread ~ Vanilla Bean Loaves ~
Wonderful Scones ~ Zucchini Bread
Chicken Curry ~Cucumber Mint
~Carrot-Ginger ~ Cucumber-Goat
Cheese and Watercress ~Putting on
the Ritz Egg Salad ~ Radish Poppy
Seed Tea Sandwiches ~ Spring
Radish Tea Sandwiches
Radish Sandwiches on
Spreads & Toppings
Mock Devonshire Cream
Quick Breads & Scones
Cake ~ Pies ~ Cookies ~ Boccone
Dolce (Sweet Mouthful) ~ Cranberry
Tartlet ~ English Trifle ~ Fresh
Strawberries Dipped in Chocolate ~
High Tea Lemon Cookies ~ Lavender
To eat it, pull off a leaf, dip it,
scrape the flesh from the base of the
leaf with your top teeth, and discard
the leaf on the plate provided for that
Asparagus may be
eaten with the fingers as long as it is
not covered with sauce. It is fine to
use a fork and knife to eat
Bread must always
be broken, never cut
with a knife. Tear off a
piece that is no bigger than two bites
worth and eat that before tearing off
another. If butter is provided, then
butter the small piece and eat it.
When bacon is cooked until it is very
crisp, and there is no danger of
getting the fingers wet with grease, it
is okay to pick it up to eat.
It is never
necessary to try to
eat the cookie that comes as a
garnish to your dessert with a
spoon. Unless the cookie has fallen
so far into the chocolate sauce that
there is not a clean corner by which
to pick it up.
Corn on the Cob
It is unlikely that it will
be served at a formal
event, but if you encounter corn on
the cob, it may be picked up and
eaten. The approved method of
doing so is to butter one or two rows
at a time and to eat across the cob
French Fries, Fried Chicken,
Chips, and Hamburger
These items (also classified as fast
foods will not be served in a formal
setting. Most are eaten with the
hands, although a particularly
messy hamburger could be eaten
with a fork and knife. Also, steak
fries (the thick-cut, less crispy
variety) may be best eaten with a
Hors d’Oeuvres, Crudités
Almost everything that is served at a
cocktail party or during a pre-meal
cocktail hour is intended to be eaten
with the fingers. Some of these
foods make appearances at regular
meals as well (although not usually
in very formal ones). When they do,
it is still permissible to use the
fingers to eat them. This includes
olives, pickles, nuts, deviled eggs,
eat them with your fingers.
Otherwise, as with all berries, the
utensil of choice is a spoon. In the
case of grapes, you may encounter a
special scissors, to cut off a small
cluster from the bunch. If not, tear
a portion from the whole, rather
than plucking off single grapes,
which leaves a cluster of
unattractive bare stems on the
Small Fruits and Berries on
If you are served strawberries with
the hulls, on, cherries with stems or
grapes in a bunch, then it is okay to
straightforward sandwich is any
sandwich that is not open-faced, not
too tall to fit in the mouth, not
saturated with dripping sauces or
loaded with mushy filling. It is
intended to be picked up and eaten.
Otherwise, use a fork and knife.
Basic Table Setting
Server Plate (will be replaced with a Dinner Plate) is
placed on table allowing about two feet for each person
and in the CENTER of the space
Soup Bowl Placed in the CENTER
Salad Plate to the LEFT of the dinner plate just
above the NAPKIN and SALAD FORK
Dinner Roll Plate and Butter Spreader
of the bread plate) – Place just above the DINNER PLATE,
a little to the left
Place napkin to the LEFT side of the SALAD FORK
with the INSIDE FOLD facing the DINNER PLATE
Salad Fork is placed on the LEFT HAND side of the
Dinner Fork is placed to the LEFT side of the
Dinner Knife Placed at the RIGHT of the DINNER
Beverage Spoon Placed on the right hand side to the
RIGHT of the DINNER KNIFE
10. Soup Spoon Placed at the RIGHT of the DINNER
SPOON (If serving soup)
11. Beverage Glasses (Water)
Placed to the RIGHT
hand side starting at the TIP of the KNIFE.
12. Beverage Glasses (Milk or Juice) Placed to the
RIGHT hand side of the WATER GLASS
This is fairly easy to master. Your waiter will fill the
glasses in the correct order. When each course is
finished, allow the server to remove the glass for that
course as well as the plate.
Beverage Glasses Positions (minimum of five glasses)
Sherry or Aperitif Glass
The glass farthest to the right may be a sherry or aperitif
glass, if one is served to accompany the soup course. This
will be the first glass you use.
White Wine Glass
Next is the white wine glass, which is used during the fish
course or appetizer.
Rules: In a formal place setting, the first two rules to
1) Solids are to the LEFT (Yes, your bread plate to the
2) Liquids to the RIGHT
Red Wine Glass
Behind the white wine glass is the red wine glass. This
glass is larger, with a fuller bowl that allows the red wine
The largest glass is the water goblet, which sits just above
the dinner knife.
Utensils are placed in the order used. You always work
from the “outside in” as the meal progresses.
Finally, behind and to the right of the water goblet is the
champagne glass, if champagne will accompany dessert.
Formal meals normally have a minimum of five glasses at
the table. Each glass is slightly different in shape and size.
You may also find a champagne glass in the first position,
perhaps served with oysters as an appetizer.
Formal Dining Table Setting
Server Plate ( Replaced with a Dinner Plate)
Bread & Butter Plate
Small Cocktail Fork- placed to the right of the
soup spoon. (This cocktail fork will be the ONLY fork that
will ever be to the right.)
Dessert Spoon & Fork
Red Wine Goblet
White Wine Goblet
Coffee or Tea Setting (Placed on the table at end
of meal, often with the desserts.)
Power (10) Tips
Research has shown that eating a
nutritious breakfast that includes
grain or protein and fruit or juice
helps to improve students’ test
scores, behavior and well-being.
1. Start with Breakfast (Daily)
2. Exercise Regularly
Work up a
better, gives you more energy, and
helps you look and feel your best.
Start with a warm-up that stretches
stairs instead of the escalator or
elevator. Try to do these things for a
total of 30 minutes every day.
4. Snack Smart
Snacks are a great way to refuel.
Choose snacks from different food
groups – have a glass of low-fat milk
and a few celery sticks with peanut
butter and raisins, or some dry
cereal. If you eat smart at other
meals, cookies, chips, and candy are
okay for occasional snacking.
5. Grains, Fruits, and Vegetables.
Include 20 minutes of aerobic
activity, such as running, jogging or
dancing. Follow-up with activities
that help make you stronger such as
push-ups or lifting weights. Then
cool-down with more stretching.
Breakfast fills your “empty tank” to
get you going after a long night
without food. Eating a good
breakfast can help you do better in
school. Easy to prepare breakfasts
include cold cereal with fruit and
low-fat milk, whole- wheat toast with
peanut butter, yogurt with fruit,
whole-grain waffles or even last
3. Get Moving!
It is easy to fit
into your daily
routine. Try to fit
into your daily
routine – take the
Energy Foods –Eating more grains,
fruits and vegetable gives you
carbohydrates for energy plus
vitamins, minerals, and fiber.
Besides, they taste good! Try breads
such as whole-wheat bread, bagels,
and pita. Spaghetti and oatmeal are
also in the grain group.
6. Balance Your Food Choices
Do not eat too much of one thing.
You do not have to give up foods like
hamburgers, French fries, and ice
cream to eat healthfully. Your body
needs protein, carbohydrates, fat,
and many different vitamins and
minerals such as Vitamins C and A,
iron, and calcium from a variety of
7. Healthy Eating Style
A healthy eating style is like a puzzle
with many parts. Each part, or food,
is different. Some foods may have
more fat, sugar or salt, while others
may have more vitamins or fiber.
There is a place for all these foods.
What makes a diet good or bad is
how foods fit together.
Balancing your choices is important.
At dinner choose lower fat foods. Fit
in a higher fat food like a meat pizza
in moderation. If two pieces of pizza
fill you up, do not eat a third.
8. Exercise with Family or Friends
Being active is more
fun with family or
friends. Invite others
to join you and plan
one special physical
activity like a bike
ride or hiking, with a
9. School Physical Activities
Join in. Whether you take a
physical education class or do other
physical activities at school, such as
intramural sports, structured
activities are a sure way to feel good,
look good and stay physically fit.
10. Fun Physical Activities
How to Eat To Live
Six (6) Nutrient Groups
Group One (1) - Water
Water transports other nutrients
to cells, carries wastes away,
aids digestion and more. It makes
up more than half your bodyweight.
SOURCES: water ~ juices and other
beverages, soups and many “solid”
foods (fruits, vegetables, breads, etc.)
Group Two (2) – Minerals
Build bones, teeth, blood, and help
the body use energy. Especially
important to young people:
Group (3) Three - Calcium
Take advantage of physical activities
you and your friends enjoy doing
together. Be adventurous. Try new
sports, games, and other activities as
well as new foods. You will grow
stronger, play longer, and look and
feel better! Set realistic goals – don’t
try changing too much at once.
Calcium is found in milk,
cheese and other dairy products,
and also in some green vegetables.
Group Four (4) Proteins
Proteins build and
repair cells, fight infection, and
make your blood strong. Found in
meat, poultry and shellfish, dried
beans and peas, dark green leafy
vegetables (spinach, etc.), and dried
Complex carbohydrate foods provide
calories and other nutrients. (They
are also sources of fiber, essential for
digestion and the prevention of some
diseases.) Simple carbohydrates
provide calories, but not much else.
COMPLEX PROTEIN SOURCES
These include breads, noodles,
grains, cereals, potatoes, nuts,
seeds, dried beans, lentils and peas,
vegetable, and some fruits.
Fish, meat, chicken, eggs, milk, and
COMPLETE PROTEIN SOURCES
Dried beans, lentils and peas, nuts,
breads, noodles, grains and cereals
VITAMINS help the body use food
and work properly.
ESPECIALLY GOOD SOURCES:
Carrots, spinach, broccoli, green
peppers, leaf lettuce, cantaloupe,
citrus fruits, tomatoes, potatoes,
whole and enriched grains, milk
products, fish, meat, and poultry.
Group Five (5) - Carbohydrates
(calories) for muscles,
nerves, and the brain.
These include table sugar, powdered
sugar, brown sugar and “natural”
sugars in honey, corn, and some
Group Six (6) – Fats
Provide energy and
fatty acids, helps
digestion. Too much
fat can be harmful.
oils, margarine, butter (and food
fried in them), whole milk, cream,
most cheeses, meats, poultry
(especially with skin), eggs,
chocolate, avocados, peanut butter
Note: A good source of a vitamin or
mineral contributes at least 10
percent of its Percent Daily Value per
serving. A good source of dietary fiber
contributes at least 2 grams of
dietary fiber per serving.
Good Sources of Vitamin A
Good Sources of
Apple & Pears with skin
Potato with skin
Potato with skin
Remember: You have to burn 3500
calories to lose one pound of fat.
Good Sources of Potassium
Good Sources of Foliate
Fun Food Facts
Did You Know?
Fast Food Isn’t New!
The remains of fast
foods shops have
been found in
ancient ruins! Even
ancient Greeks enjoyed
takeout. The only thing that is new is the
production, standard menus and
recipes of fast-food “chains.” Wow!
Other Interesting Food Facts
Lemons contain more
sugar than strawberries.
In France, people eat approximately
700 million snails per year.
The onion is named after
a Latin word meaning
large pearl of rice. Half
world’s population lives
on a diet staple of rice.
The first mass
was corn flakes.
Instant coffee has been
in existence since the
middle of the 18th century.
The word salary
comes from the
Latin word salarium. Salt was used
in ancient times to pay for work
done. Today, salt (a form of sodium)
is so prevalent in packaged foods
that it is far too easy to eat too much
salt. Watch your daily sodium intake
and read labels.
Frozen Fruits and Vegetables
The longer that
fruits or vegetables sit around
waiting to be sold or eaten, the more
nutrients they lose. Fruits and
vegetables grown for freezing are
usually frozen right after they are
picked, and have less time to lose
likely of various tales about the
origin of chop suey is that it was
created by Chinese immigrants in
Temperature can affect
your appetite. You are
more likely to be hungry if you are
Have A Tomato With
Your Burger! When a
source of Vitamin C
(orange, lemon, grapefruit,
strawberry, tomato, etc) is eaten with
meat or cooked dry
beans, the body makes
better use of the iron in
the protein food.
Taking a Message
Within two (2) hours of
standing in daylight, milk
loses between half and
two-thirds of its vitamin B content.
Bakers used to be fined if
their loaves of bread
were under weight, so
they used to add an
extra loaf of bread to
every dozen, just in
case – hence, the expression “baker’s
Fish with Lemon
It has been
serve fish with
lemon since the Middle Ages. People
believed that the fruit’s juice from
the lemon would dissolve any bones
Be considerate of the
family telephone –
others might wish
to use the phone.
In a friendly voice, answer by saying
hello, good morning, or good
afternoon. If the caller wishes to
speak to you, answer, “This is
he/she” or “This is James.” If the
call is for another person and he/she
is nearby, say to the caller, “One
Your Neighbor’s Phone
If answering the telephone at
someone else’s home, simply say,
“Hello, Jackson residence.”
If the person is not home, listen
carefully to what the caller says and
take a message. Keep a pad and
pencils on your desk at all times for
writing down messages.
1. Ask the caller his/her name. If
you do not know the correct
spelling of the caller’s name,
ask the caller to spell his/her
2. Ask for their phone number.
3. Write down the message that the
caller would like to leave.
Leaving Voice Messages at Home
In a clear voice repeat your name
and telephone number, and a short
message that is to the point. Repeat
your phone number slowly.
Gum Chewing and Talking
Do not chew or crack your gum
when speaking on the phone or
speaking to others in person
If you are talking to a caller and the
second line rings, apologize to the
first caller and ask them if they
would please hold.
Talking During Mealtime
Never answer the phone or talk to
another person on the phone while
Answer the second caller, get the
caller’s name, phone number, and
tell them you are on a call and will
call them back as soon as you finish.
Return to the first caller thanking
the caller for being patient and finish
the business conversation. Call the
second caller promptly after you
have completed the first call, just as
you had promised.
Please keep business calls
professional or businesslike.
Receiving Business Calls
Pick up the phone and answer with
a very clear voice. Identify your
company name and yourself. For
“Nia’s Enchanted Hair Boutique &
Beauty Spa, Nia speaking; how may
I assist you?”
your company’s phone number and
Office Answering Machine
If your company uses an answering
machine or voice mail, please check
your messages as soon as you return
to your desk.
Disconnected Calls at Work and
Home – Who Calls Back?
The person who originated/initiated
the call is responsible for calling
back the other party
Keeping Phone Records
Keep a record of all calls that comes
into the office. Use a phone message
pad or phone log that indicates who
called, the caller’s phone number,
and date and time of the call. You
can also log the message in the
computer and save to retrieve when
Cell Phone Etiquette
Business messages always leave
your company’s name, your name,
Always use discretion when using a
cellular phone in a social
environment. It is best to refrain
from placing cell phone calls during
social events. Only answer incoming
calls after excusing yourself from the
immediate area and remember to
Cell Phone Pictures
Never take anyone’s picture with
your cell phone without his or her
permission. Taking someone’s
picture and publishing it without
their permission is violating the law.
drivers is restricted in 21 states and
Text messaging is banned for all
drivers in 19 states and DC. Even if
you use a hands-free headset, you
are still distracted by trying to have
a conversation while driving. Pull off
the road if you have to answer or
place a call. Never TEXT while
When you arrive face to face with the
clerk or associate do not continue
talking on your cell phone. Your
actions in most cases will be
upsetting to the others in line behind
you and the staff person waiting to
Stay focused on why you are
there and what business you need
Standing in line
Talking and Texting While
Driving a Car
Talking and texting on your cell
phone can be hazardous to you, your
passengers and other drivers. As of
2010, a ban on driving while talking
on a hand-held cell phone is in place
in 7 states (California, Connecticut,
New Jersey, New York, Oregon,
Utah, and Washington) and the
District of Columbia). The use of all
cell phones while driving a school
bus is prohibited in 17 states and
the District of Columbia (DC). The
use of all cell phones by novice
It is not polite to talk on your cell
phone while standing in line at a
place of business such as in a bank,
deli, department store, airport,
restaurant, and other public places.
Important Email Etiquette Tips:
1. Be concise and to the point.
Avoid long sentences.
2. Answer all questions and
pre-empt further questions.
3. Use proper spelling,
grammar & punctuation.
4. Use templates for frequently
5. Answer promptly.
6. Do not attach unnecessary
7. Use proper structure &
8. Do not overuse the high
9. Do not write in CAPITAL
LETTERS. It equals shouting.
Do not leave out the
Add disclaimers to your
Read the email before
you send it.
Do not overuse Reply to
abbreviations and emoticons.
Take care with rich text
and HTML messages.
Do not forward chain
letters or Internet hoaxes.
Do not copy a message
or attachment without
Do not use emails to
Use a meaningful
Avoid using URGENT
Do not send or forward
defamatory, offensive, racist
or obscene remarks.
Do not reply to spam.
Use cc: field sparingly.
Do not make an email
longer than it needs to be.
Don’t assume that no
one else will read the email.
A company needs to implement
etiquette rules for the following
1) Professionalism: By using
proper email language your
company will convey a
2) Efficiency: Emails that get to
the point are much more
effective than poorly worded
3) Protection from liability:
Employee awareness of email
risks will protect your
company from costly lawsuits.
Why is email etiquette important?
Reading is essential in the
educational process. It is the
gateway to the liberal arts and to
seeking knowledge, to learning about
the past, to understanding the
present, to being able to see what
others are writing about the future.
Mathematics is the gateway to the
sciences. You cannot understand
chemistry, physics, or logic, unless
you have a background in
mathematics. In an increasingly
technological world, the
mathematics skills of the Nation’s
workers are a crucial component of
Parent Involvement and
Much research supports the view
that involvement by parents,
guardians or other caregivers in a
child’s’ education has a positive
impact on student achievement.
Parental involvement is crucial.
The first step to higher achievement
is to believe that one can achieve.
Parents should instill a belief system
in their children that they can
achieve at a higher academic level.
Research has shown that
expectations have a substantial
impact on academic achievement.
Children should be given a list of
non-negotiable rules. Teach children
to respect others and adhere to the
dress code for school and work.
Children with a strong work ethic
and high self-esteem can achieve
whatever they want to achieve. Each
person is the sum total of his/her
Music influences young people so
listen to what they listen.
Begin talking to them
at an early age about
going to college and take
them on college tours when
the time comes.
develop basic computer skills, so
they can become Internet literate.
Support the superintendent and the
board of education in setting and
pursuing high educational
Your Child’s School
The best way
schools is to
not accept unscheduled visitors.
Make a list of schools that you might
want to visit. The list will not tell you
which schools are good or bad. It is
just a tool to help you determine
your own priorities and to evaluate
whether a school meets your child’s
• Find out which school is your
• Visit your assigned school no
matter what you have heard
about it. You owe it to yourself
and the school to visit. It has
become commonplace to
blame schools for children who
fail. Many of the “failing”
schools are the places where
teachers work the hardest,
against the most difficult
social problems, and deserve
the most respect.
• Talk to your friends and
neighbors to get their ideas.
• Talk to your child’s current
teacher for ideas.
• Research programs and test
scores with independent
materials that compare
• Rank your
you tour. Begin
school and visit schools in
reverse order of your priorities,
from your least to most
After you have toured, go back
over the checklist and identify
any major areas of concern.
Talk with students and their
parents at your top choices to
get their input.
Attend a PTA meeting or
request the name of an active
parent in the school who can
answer your questions.
How are students expected to
learn? Example: Do students
work independently at their
own desk or in groups?
How is the curriculum
Are teachers and parents
included in school-wide
planning about the
Is the work challenging?
If the work is over their head,
how do they get extra help and
How are students with greater
abilities challenged in the
Does the content in the class
seem appropriate for the grade
How many students are
receiving college credits?
What advanced placement
courses are offered?
What college guidance is
What exposure to the work
world is provided?
Do student receive help
finding summer jobs or
School Principal –
principals who have
partnerships. Principals should visit
every teacher’s classroom. They
should walk the halls a lot and know
their school and its students.
their content areas. They will bring
high expectations to the classroom,
and make a connection between
home and school.
Schools are now a blend of many
different cultures. This demands
that today’s teachers be equipped
and confident to teach in a diverse
The climate determines behavior of
students in the classroom, for
example, the extent to which
teachers and principals believes that
youth can achieve. The teaching
environment should be exciting,
creative, have lots of bright student
artwork displayed. A warm teaching
environment gives students a sense
of safety, security and comfort.
Look for teachers who impress
students in the same way you would
impress a visitor to your home.
Teachers should make them feel
welcome in the classroom. Children
are happy to return to a class that
has a welcoming environment.
all children can
everyone to set
and continues to strive for the best
from students. Teachers should
provide clear expectations to
students and parents.
Make sure teachers know their
subject matter in depth. Look for
teachers who have knowledge of
Always check out the school’s yearly
report card. You can do this online
or by getting a copy from the school’s
Schools must have support
structures in place to facilitate
academic achievement. The school
must provide a support structure to
help students stay in school (middle
and high school).
High Expectations and
Education is a constructive, driving
force for positive change. Without a
good education, the chance for
individuals to do well in society is
not very good. Children who are not
prepared for work or prepared to
attend college, will face very
competitive, difficult and stressful
times. This is the battle for their
ability to live independently.
Children who have been poorly
educated will most likely also be
As parents we must challenge our
children to achieve at a high and
competitive level. We have no choice
but to give the best to our children
in terms of instruction, and, in
return, we must expect the best from
Do not select a university or college
based on tuition and fees. Parents
and students often forget that almost
all educational institutions have
grants and scholarships available.
Do not think you cannot go to the
university or college of your desire.
Financial aid is sometimes available.
University or College Application
Apply to as many schools as possible
that offer the desired major.
Never answer your cell phone in
front of the admissions clerk – it
could make a difference in whether
accepted to that university or
members will call this person first
for any information on you.
Set high achievement goals for
yourself and your children. Research
has shown that most first-year
students will change their major
three (3) times before they get it
Our children are our most
valuable resource and we
must help them to achieve.
Make friends with your guidance
counselor. The dean and other staff
Fashion Tips for
Fashion & Accessory Tips
guide is for
trends to get
Choosing Your Style
Sharpen your fashion skills with
these practical tips to flatter your
figure and make your clothes work
for you. The styles you choose will
affect your appearance and how
Every woman has flaws. These ideas
are for those who accept them, but
wish to minimize them.
1. Stand up straight, have good
posture and carry yourself
with grace. Not only will you
appear taller, you will radiate
2. Know your body and what
3. You are logically attracted to
styles and colors that flatter
4. Use past experience to your
advantage and trust your
intuition; sometimes fashion
and beauty etiquette comes
5. Feel free to experiment!
Boutique “Skinny Mirrors”
Beware of those
stores that are
misleading. If a
style didn’t look good on you in the
past, it won’t now—unless you’ve
made some major changes.
you think flatter your figure.
Have plenty of neutrals on hand to
mix and match.
Always carry a safety pin in your
purse for emergencies.
Open collar shirts and scoop necks
will lengthen a short neck. Add a
Know what looks good on you!
flatter most women’s
Shoulder pads: will help you
balance large breasts and wide hips,
but keep them slim.
Shoes: Break in your shoes before
wearing for an entire day or special
Fix sticky zippers by rubbing them
with some wax or a bar of soap.
Always clean your
clothes before storing
Purchase Similar Styles
similar to the
already own that
If you are losing or gaining weight,
go to your local thrift store and get
some in-between sizes that fit.
Make sure your pantyhose fit
correctly. Tugging on them in public
is a no-no.
Do not be afraid to try anything new.
Do not bare all.
Leave some mystery to your look.
Secure your buttons by dabbing the
backs of them with fingernail polish
or clear glue. This prevents the
stitching from coming loose.
If you are concerned about clingy
clothing, do not buy anything with
more than 5% Lycra.
Use dryer sheets or fabric spray to
reduce static cling.
Leather has a tendency to stretch, so
buy your pants one size smaller.
If a department store does not have
your size, ask your sales associate to
contact another store. Many stores
are set up to call their other stores to
locate and ship the desired size
directly to you.
Do not fret if
you see an
outfit in a
is too pricey
outfit at stores
such as the Macy, Gap , Old Navy,
Chico’s, Dillard and Nordstrom at a
fraction of the price. Just cut out the
picture and take it shopping with
Apply your perfume before
dressing to prevent staining
your clothing. Apply your
Your hat style determines the
occasion and the outfit with which it
should be worn.
Men and women
know what a lift
a new hat can
give. But if the
hat is wrong, it
can ruin the
whole outfit. Choose
a hat that is suitable for your outfit
Choose a hat according to your
figure. Do not wear a small hat on
your head, if you are a full figured
person. (It will make you look out of
Always match your hat in size
according to your figure, color and
design with your outfit you are
planning to wear. (See the
illustration on the next page.)
Try your hat on in a full-length
mirror with your outfit to see if the
entire ensemble is in balance.
Ladies wearing dressy suits or
dresses should have a more
glamorous hat – such as, velvet, soft
satin, flowers, or feathers, but
simple in design.
Ladies casual tweed suits look best
with a tailored cloche or simple beret.
Right Hat for Your Figure “Short
Stocky Figure” A
A short stocky figure with a short neck and a large
bosom looks even shorter, because, top heavy under a
large, wide hat (a)
On Figure (a), the hat is scaled down in
width and is much higher to give a taller,
slimmer look. It sets higher on the head,
which is more flattering to the short-necked
Right Hat for Your Outfit “Hat
Sizes & Outfits” B
Hat size applies to outfit as well as figure. This coat
with a large, high collar has all of the weight at the top
of the figure when a big hat is put over it (b).
The smaller hat, on figure (b) gives a clean,
more balanced look to the coat with the
Right Hat for Your Figure “Slim
Figure” C A too-small hat used with a sleek, slim
dress like this gives a bare, unfinished look to the outfit
Over-the-shoulder purses belong with a casual outfit
gray, brown, taupe and navy.
Often, two neutrals can be used, with a third color to
brighten the whole outfit. Shades of a bright accessory
color can also be used in the same ensemble without
overdoing the color.
Dressy – A dressy purse of suede or fabric is out of place
with a sweater and skirt. Usually, a dressy bag is smaller
than the one generally used for every day.
Shoes and purses in most cases are of the same color.
Suitable Accessories -- Colors
Jewelry – Neutral Colors
Neutral black can safely be used
for all accessories.
Other neutral colors that can also be used more freely are
Gloves and Hats are of the same color.
Does it ride up? Then buy a longer
Wear only conservative
outfits in an office
not wear tight
skirts or tight
Suit pieces should be same color
Skirt suits or pants suits are
acceptable; 100 % wool or wool
blend in dark grey or blue solids or
Skirt-suits are still considered more
appropriate by conservative
employers. Skirt length should be no
shorter than 1” above knee. Wear
the skirt to practice sitting in it.
Recommended shoe colors are black,
burgundy or brown leather. Pumps
or flats with a 1-2” heel; no spikes.
Neutral or skin tone
Bring an extra pair for emergencies.
Tights are not as dressy as sheer
Shirts should be of cotton, wool,
polyester, cashmere, or silk blends
in conservative colors.
Attire for Women
Short or long sleeves with a jewel
Jacket & Pants, Skirt or Dress
Blouse or shell - Press shirt/blouse
carefully, particularly the collar No
Jacket and pants or skirt do not
need to be the same color.
Final Mirror Check
Knit Tops of
cashmere or silk
blends; short or
sweater sets. No
Woven Tops of 100% cotton or
cotton/polyester blends. Any muted
conservative solid, stripe, or plaid.
Button-down, straight collar and
long sleeves are best.
do a final
Unacceptable Office Attire
However, this attire
appropriative for other
Purchase a nice
leather briefcase if
needed for your job.
Watches and Rings should be
simple. Please one ring only.
Black, burgundy or brown leather
pumps or flats with 1-2” heel; no
spikes. Polish and clean shoes (don’t
wear outside, particularly if raining
Invest in a Mont Blanc pen
or any other handsome writing
instrument that you can afford.
Tights and Socks
Colored tights or socks are
appropriate for casual wear and
should complement your outfit.
For the office, wear simple earrings.
Do not wear long dangle earrings
and only one earring per ear.
Scarves or long necklaces blouses
are generally not recommended
counter at your local department
store for advice and a personal
Bath or Shower
Eyewear: Make sure that your
eyewear is simple and clean. Select
fashionable eyewear that will
complement your face.
Undergarments should fit properly
and be 100% non-visible
Personal Facial ~ Use a daily facial
for your face.
Tattoos are not an accessory –
Cover all visible tattoos.
Gum is not an accessory.
Makeup should be minimal! Use
colors. Learn the
correct way to
apply your make
up. Visit a salon or
Hair looks best
from your face,
so as not to be a
distraction. It is
also best to
have a fresh
and styled, but not over-gelled.
Nails ~ Clean and trim fingernails;
no long nails and no
color polish! Clear
nail polish is best.
Colognes ~ Do not over use cologne.
Cuffs and Cufflinks
Your shirt should be 100% cotton or
cotton/polyester blend. Shirts of
broadcloth or pinpoint oxford are
best. The most common shirt to wear
is white or a conservative color.
A man’s suit should be100% wool or
wool blend and a conservative fit.
Button the jacket when standing;
unbutton when seated.
Suit jacket and pants should be the
same color, preferably in dark grey,
blue or black solids or pinstripes.
spend the money on dry cleaning.
Most commonly worn under the shirt
is a plain white crewneck
Cuffs should extend ¼”
beyond jacket sleeve. Taped or
regular fit (not full-cut)
Most commonly worn
tie width is
same as jacket
lapels (2 ¾” – 3 ½”).
The tie color should complement
suit. No logo or cartoon ties.
Belts and Shoe Colors
The belt should match the shoe
color. Best colors are black,
burgundy, and brown.
Wear leather, dark colored shoes
that lace up and that complement
your suit. Make sure your shoes are
polished and clean.
Attire for Men
Jacket and Woven Shirts
A nice pullover shirt can also be
worn. A sweater vest or long sleeve
sweater can be worn over a shirt
with a collar.
Wear lightweight business socks in
dark colors that complement your
blends. Must have collar (no crew
neck), short or long sleeves.
Casual Jacket and Pants
A jacket is not necessary for casual
business attire. Jacket and pants do
not need to be same color.
Socks: Wear dark colored socks that
complement both your pants and
A belt should be worn around the
waist-- no sagging pants.
Shirt: The most
cotton or a
blend in any muted, conservative
solid, stripe, or plaid. The most
popular shirts worn are button-down
or straight collar with long sleeves.
Cotton, wool, polyester or cashmere
Shoes Wear dark leather slip on or
lace-up. Make sure your shoes are
polished and clean.
Secure your belt around your waist
and through the pant loops
Pants: Nice wool blend pressed
cotton pants are okay. Check for
proper rise fit and inseam.
Ties are not necessary for casual
Belt should match shoe color.
Underwear should fit properly and
be 100% non-visible.
Unacceptable Office Attire
However, this attire maybe very
acceptable for other job
A simple watch is okay. Match your
watch color with belt buckle color. A
tie tack is not necessary.
over-stuffed wallet will not have a
neat appearance in your suit pants.
No fat wallets!
Writing Instruments: Invest in a
Mont Blanc pen or any other
handsome writing instrument that
you can afford.
Wear your wedding band or one
Earring and Other Rings
The night before an interview,
seriously consider removing any
nose rings or other rings on your
body that are visible.
Cover all visible tattoos.
Briefcase: Purchase a nice leather
briefcase if needed for the job.
Wallet / Billfold
You should have a nice leather
wallet and never over stuff it. An
Coffee and Newspaper
Do not have a cup of
coffee or read a newspaper at your
interview. Remember, this is not a
Gum is not an accessory – please do
not chew gum in public.
Do one final check in the mirror!
close to your face. Have it combed
and styled, but not over-gelled.
After shave lotion and cologne
should be applied sparingly.
Fragrances are often offensive to
business associates and therefore
inappropriate in a professional
No facial hair is best for conservative
companies. At minimum, trim
neatly and close to face.
Cologne and After Shave Lotion
Remember, to shampoo your hair
after a haircut.
Brush and comb your hair in a neat
Consider cutting long
hair. it is also best to
have a fresh haircut
trimmed neatly and
Clean and trim finger nails.
punctuation, and spelling.
Brush Teeth and Floss
Resumé Writing Tips
Select quality bond paper for your
final copies. Use white, ivory, cream,
beige, buff, or light grey paper.
Use a letter-quality or laser printer
and black type.
Fold and mail your résumé in a
matching envelope or mail it flat in a
9” x 12” white or manila envelope.
Use soap and deodorant
DO . . .
Make certain your resumé is concise,
well spaced and visually attractive.
Use action words to describe your
experiences (see list of power words).
Shoes ~Keep your shoes clean and
polished at all times
Have someone else critique and
proofread your résumé.
Quantify your experiences
Be consistent in your use of dates,
numbers, abbreviations, etc.
Check and recheck for errors; look
closely for mistakes in grammar,
DO NOT . . .
Type the word “Résumé” above your
Use abbreviations or contractions.
Write lengthy prose.
Use multiple fonts, typographic
symbols or other visual elements.
Use personal pronouns (I, we, my).
Include a photograph.
Mention personal data (e.g., height,
weight, health, age or date of birth,
marital status, race, religion, sex,
Key for Your Resume
Here are a few of power words that
you can include on a resume.
Basic Resumé Format
[Type your name]
[Type Your Phone Number]
[Type Your Address]
[Type Your E-Mail Address]
[Type Your Web Site]
[Type the Objectives]
[Type the Year] – [Type the Degree]
List of Accomplishments
[Type the start date] – [Type the end date] – [Type the job
[Type job responsibilities]
[Type list of skills]
Basic Cover Letter Format
[City, St, Zip Code]
[City, St, Zip Code]
If you have any questions, please call me at (999) 9999999. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Dear [Recipient name]
We spoke on Monday. As promised, I am enclosing a copy
of my resume.
I am also enclosing copies of:
Sample Job Application
Print, then practice filling out this job application form and use it as a
guide when completing applications for employment.
Instructions: Print clearly in black or blue ink. Answer all questions.
Sign and date the form.
Full Name __________________________________________________________
Street Address: City, State, Zip Code
Phone Numbers: Home ___________Cell ___________ Other
Are you eligible to work in the United States?
Yes ____ No____
If you are under age 18, do you have an employment/age certificates?
EMPLOYMENT HISTORY: Present or Last Position:
Yes _______ No_______
Have you been convicted of or pleaded no contest to a felony within
the last five years? Yes_______ No_______
If yes, please explain:
Supervisor: _______________________________ Phone:
Position Title: _______________________________________________________
Position Applied For:
Days/Hours Available: Monday __ Tuesday __ Wednesday__
Thursday __ Friday __ Saturday __ Sunday __
Hours Available: from _______to _____
Salary: $ ___________________________________________________________
What date are you available to start work?
Reason for Leaving:
Employer Name: _______________________Address:
Name and Address of School - Degree/Diploma - Graduation Date
Skills and Qualifications: Licenses, Skills, Training, Awards
City ____________________________State _______Zip Code
Supervisor: __________________ Phone: ____________________
Position Title: ____________________________________________
From: _________________________ to: ______________________
Reason for Leaving: ______________________________________
May We Contact Your Present Employer? Yes ___ No ___
Name/Title/Address/Phone Numbers/E-mail address
I certify that information contained in this application is true and
I understand that false information may be grounds for not hiring me
or for immediate termination of employment at any point in the
future, if I am hired. I authorize the verification of any or all
information listed above.
Personal Check List
for Your Interview
Remember: You only have one chance to make a first
impression. Follow this guideline and you will be sure to
impress the employer. Your first impressions can affect
the rest of the interview.
Choose responses and verbal statements that promote
Greet the interviewer with enthusiasm and a firm
Be personable and prepared to “make small talk.”
Be polite to support staff (their input matters.)
Reflect confidence in your voice tone.
Use proper grammar and
communicate in a professional manner.
Try to avoid “UMS” and “YOU KNOW.”
Make Eye Contact with the interviewer at all times.
Research the position and company prior to the interview.
Prepare yourself by practicing.
Thank the interviewer for your interview.
Make a good first impression.
Arrive 15 minutes early for the interview.
Wear conservative colors.
Nails should be trimmed and clean.
Hair should be well groomed and away from your face.
Eye glasses should be cleaned and polished.
Wear a belt with pants around your waist.
No “pants on the ground.”
Cover tattoos if possible.
One ring per hand.
One earring per ear.
Okay you are now ready for your
The following are common questions asked by
Job Interview Tips
Most employers follow a
standard outline during the
(The interviewer may give you a
preview of what will occur during
The employer may give you a
brief overview of the position or additional information
about the organization.
You respond to questions. (If it is a good interview, this is
the longest segment and you should do most of the
You ask questions of the interviewer. Have at least five or
ten questions prepared beforehand.
Anticipate questions you will be asked and prepare
What are your greatest strengths and weaknesses?
Why did you select Texas Women’s University?
Why did you choose the major in fashion and marketing?
Why did you choose your career field?
What are your career goals?
Where do you see yourself in five or ten years?
How has your college experience prepared you for your
What qualifications do you have that will make you
successful in this position?
Describe your most rewarding accomplishment.
Describe a challenge you encountered and how you dealt
Why are you interested in working for our organization?
What do you know about our organization?
Tell me a little bit about yourself.
How would you describe yourself?
What two or three things are most important to you in
Why should I hire you?
Questions for the Employer
Formulate Questions of
High Quality for the Employer
Do Your Homework
Be prepared beforehand
to ask the interviewer
questions. Research the
organization and your
knowledge of the
information you gather
through research and
networking will help you
formulate questions of
Questions -you may
ask in an interview.
What is the philosophy of the organization?
What do you consider the organization’s strengths and
What are the organization’s plans and goals?
Describe the work environment.
What attracted you to this organization?
Why do you enjoy working for this organization?
Describe the typical responsibilities of the position.
What are the challenging facets of the position?
Describe the opportunities for training and professional
Employers Advancement Chart Are there opportunities
for advancement within the organization?
Ending The Interview
The interviewer closes the interview and explains the
next steps in the process.
Be sure to thank the interviewer for his or her time
Other types of interviews include telephone and
Small Talk ~ Greeting and small talk
will be use to put you at ease and
break the ice.
Look the person in his or her eyes,
and say your first and last name in a
Never pat the top of the other
In the United States, usually a
person stands the distance of one
arm’s length from an individual when
Always stand up when being
introduced. Extend your right hand in
an open vertical flat position for a
handshake (using a firm grip) but not
crushing the other person’s hand.
The handshake should last for 2-3
Avoid referring to individuals by
their first name. This assumes a
friendly relationship and often is not
Use the name that was given during
the introduction. “Steven is Steven,
Nametags should ALWAYS be placed
on the right side, so an individual
may easily look at your name when
shaking your hand.
Forget Someone’s Name
If you forget someone’s name, take
the embarrassment upon
yourself. Say something like, “I’m
sorry I know that we have met
before, you are...?”
Close an Introduction
Always remember to close an
introduction by saying something
like, “It was nice to have met you.”
Never simply walk away.
Rules of Different Conversations
Learn the art of social conversation
and appropriate topics of
conversation for formal and informal
Social Conversation is very
important. It is important to always
be attentive in the presence of
Some basic rules regarding Social
Conversation: Keep it short! It is
social conversation after all.
Avoid talking about topics that evoke
opinions or emotions such as
politics and money.
Polite conversation is not a long drawn
out one; it is used in greeting people
who start to talk to you at church,
grocery stores, airports, bus stations.
Just using a few sentences are all that
is necessary in order not to be rude.
Do not interrupt people when they
Do you finish other people’s
statements? If so, you are not
listening to the speaker!
It is important not to monopolize the
If you experience rudeness in a
social conversation, simply ignore
it. Do not waste your time and
energy thinking about it. If
appropriate and under extreme
circumstances, address it in private
with the individual.
A Real Conversationalist is a selfconfident person. He/she inspires,
simulates and teaches us. Occasionally
that person will flatter and tease us
because of an honest desire to please
and a sense of humor. A successful
conversation requires perceptiveness,
education and cultivation or selfeducation.
To be a good conversationalist you must
be up to date and current on life in
What Makes a Bad Impression
A good vocabulary is one of the most
impressive assets a person can have.
No matter how intelligent you are, if you
use swear words or too much slang in
your conversation, you will make a bad
impression. People will not perceive the
depth of your conversation or its
intelligence; they will hear only its
harshness and vulgarity.
A Common Rule
Deference refers to common
courtesy that is extended to one
another. With regard to
introductions, juniors are always
presented to seniors.
A common rule is to introduce the
highest-ranking person first, and
then introduce everyone to him or
Deference is based on rank in a
company and not on gender.
Also, remember that a client
ALWAYS outranks someone from
within your company (even your
What to Talk About
Here are some possible topics of
Line of work
In life we have many barriers that
might cause us not to effectively
communicate with others such as:
Too Tired or Too Bored
Attire & Body Language
Respect grandparents and other
people at all time.
Bad Hairdo & Attire
Be Kind to Animals
Pet Owners: Make sure you take
your pet to the veterinarian for
regular check ups.
Racism ~ Do not engage in racism!
Be kind to others (Human beings
Choices We Make
Good and Bad Behavior
Do not chase cats and dogs.
Remember you would not want a
stranger chasing you. Do not
frighten the animals.
Do not engage in conversation with
strangers on the Internet!
Homophobia ~ Understand other
people. Say, “NO” to homophobia!
There are many non-degree jobs
available in your community. Check
out the list of jobs below.
Do not give out your personal
information and place your picture
on the internet!
Keep your personal information
Riding with Strangers
Do not get in cars with strangers! Do
not place yourself in a possible
Short Order Cook
Suspicious Package If you find a
suspicious package, do not open it.
Please contact your local police
department right away.
Alcohol ~ Drugs ~ Smoking
Work for what
you want. Breaking the law will
place you in jail. Do not waste your
life behind bars. Get a real job!
Most parents think they have had
serious discussions with their teens
about drugs and alcohol, but only
about half of teens agree. So, even
though you might stumble and
falter, start talking! The stakes are
too high for you to keep silent.
Back when our children were small,
who could have imagined what life
would hold for them: pressures
surrounding sex, alcohol, drugs, and
a bewildering array of messages,
choices, and consequences.
Boxed - In jail
Do not break the law! Again, work
for want you need or want.
While it’s a rare parent who doesn’t
want to say, “Let me help you sort
things out,” we also recognize that
our children’s need for independence
grows as they do. And talking about
touchy subjects can be especially
difficult when teens tend to tune us
Create Time to Talk
Driving your teen to a sporting event
or to meet his or her friends at the
mall may seem like just another
chore, unless you recognize it as an
opportunity to talk. Of course, you
may have to get the conversation
going. Try telling your child a little
about your day or inquiring about
his or her friends, before asking her
how things are going. Make sure
your family sits down at the table
and has dinner together weekly or as
often as possible during the week.
Do Your Research Before discussing
topics like sex or drugs with your
son or daughter, first do a little
homework. Often it’s as simple as
checking the phone book for hotlines
or asking my doctor to recommend
some pamphlets. If your son or
daughter is not willing to discuss a
touchy subject, you can still give
him or her phone numbers to call or
an article to read. And, of course, tell
them you will always be available if
he or she needs your help.”
Students’ Private Matters - Talk to
your parents or school counselors
about private matters that may
concern you... Just talk to someone
Victim of Abusive Behavior
No one should hit you with any
harmful items. Please call 911 or
tell your teachers, neighbors or
someone you trust.
Do not engage in unprotected sex or
acts of incest!
Choices and Consequences
More than half of the nation’s 6-12th
graders drink alcoholic beverages.
Don’t let your teen become a
In the next 24 hours, 15,006
American teens will use drugs for
the first time. Do not let your teen be
one of them! Take only medications
prescribed by a doctor.
Do Your Research
“Before I discuss topics like sex or
drugs with my son,” one father says,
“I do a little homework. Often it’s as
simple as checking the phone book
for hotlines or asking my doctor to
recommend some pamphlets. If my
son is not willing to discuss a touchy
subject, I can still give him a number
to call or an article to read. And, of
course, I tell him I’m always
available if he needs my help.”
Listed below are only a few words
used by drugs users and dealers.
C – Cocaine
C & M – Cocaine and morphine
C Joint – Place where cocaine is sold
Cabbage Head – An individual who
will use or experiment with any kind
Cabello (Spanish) – Cocaine
Cadillac Express – Methcathinone
Cafeteria Use – Use of various drugs
sedatives or hypnotics
Cafeteria-Style Use – Using a
combination of different club drugs
Help your teens kick this dangerous
habit or better yet, convince them
never to start. Smoking is not
fashionable anymore, and research
has proven that smoking kills
Caine – Cocaine; Crack Cocaine
Cakes – Round discs of crack
Calbo (Spanish) – Heroin
Street Drugs Slang Words