Kids' Turn at Relate Conference 09


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Presentation by Claire Barnes Executive Director of Kids' Turn

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Kids' Turn at Relate Conference 09

  2. 2. Kids’ Turn Agenda I. Welcome and Introductions II. About Kids’ Turn III. Future Direction – Emotional Intelligence IV. Q & A slide number
  3. 3. KIDS’ TURN The Problem •Parental separation is an epidemic in the United States. • Fifty percent of all children in the United States experience parental separation before the age of eighteen. •All childhood difficulties (developmental, academic, medical, psychological, etc.) have a tangential relationship to and are magnified by parental divorce or separation 2
  4. 4. KIDS’ TURN The Response Research conducted in the 1990’s verified that children whose parents separate fare just as well as their ‘non-divorce’ peers when their families participate in quality divorce education programs. When Kids’ Turn was founded in 1988, it was one of the first divorce education programs in the United States. Kids’ Turn continues to be the only divorce education service in the San Francisco Bay Area. Since its founding, Kids’ Turn has served nearly 17,000 Bay Area children and parents in the immediate Bay Area. 3
  5. 5. KIDS’ TURN The Programs Parent – Child Workshop* -- six week attendance commitment requiring simultaneous attendance by parents and children. (Re-named, The Kids’ Turn Way) Early Years** – six week attendance commitment for parents only of infants, toddlers and pre-schoolers Next Step – four week attendance commitment for parents and children evolving into a step-family configuration Nonviolent Family Skills Program – violence-free parent education for youth and adults offered over fourteen weeks Grandparent Seminar – Full day seminar for grandparents who want to help their grandchildren during parental separation *Available in English, Spanish and Chinese **Available in English and Spanish 4
  6. 6. KIDS’ TURN Program Goals GOAL: Reduce Conflict in Families GOAL: Help Parents re-engage with their parenting duties GOAL: Offer children a safe place to discuss the family changes and to learn enhanced communication skills GOAL: Build Emotional Literacy skills (self-awareness, identification and modulation of emotions, openness to new ideas, creative problem solving, etc.) in all participants 6
  7. 7. KIDS’ TURN Distinctive Characteristics Evidence Based (Longitudinal study over four years by Dr. Jeffrey Cookston, SF State University, Contact at: Six Week Attendance Requirement Parent/Child Attendance Requirement Educational (not therapy) format – Skill Building Most Recent – Added Elements of Emotional Intelligence 7
  8. 8. KIDS’ TURN New Direction In 2004, Kids’ Turn was jolted out of a predictable existence and given an extraordinary opportunity to update its services making them more contemporary. With funding from the founder of CNET, we committed to a project to revise the core services infusing elements of Emotional Intelligence into our existing services. The revised curriculum documents are named: The Kids’ Turn Way. 8
  9. 9. KIDS’ TURN Why EQ? Definition: Ability to manage one’s emotions in a healthy and productive manner. Contemporary EQ answers the question: “Now what?” EQ broadens the appeal of our services to include those families who are ‘similarly situated’ to families experiencing divorce or separation. (Ex: never marrieds; never lived together.) EQ offers vibrant program delivery that is interactive and stimulating (contrasted with the original curriculum material that was very didactic.) EQ skills have application beyond divorce or separation (relationships at work, friendships, neighbors, etc.) 9
  10. 10. KIDS’ TURN The EQ Ladder 5. Manage Relationships 4. Identify Emotions in Others 3. Motivation for healthy relationships 2. Manage your emotions 1. Identify your emotions 10
  11. 11. KIDS’ TURN 1. Identify and 2. Manage your Emotions I. Identify (name) your Emotions: II. Manage your Emotions Ex: Parallel (Reverse) Parking makes Ex: I can use alternative transportation me feel: ________________________ 11
  12. 12. KIDS’ TURN Application to Divorce or Separation Identify When I have to: I Feel: See my child’s Other Parent (OP) _____________ Exchange my child with the OP _____________ Communicate with the OP _____________ Manage As an alternative, I can: • • I am in control of what I think and feel! 12
  13. 13. KIDS’ TURN Manage Emotions (cont.) --The Six Second Pause The Six Second Pause serves as a skill for emotional self regulation. 13
  14. 14. KIDS’ TURN The Six Second Pause Emotions ahead of intellect: Intellect Emotions 14
  15. 15. KIDS’ TURN The Six Second Pause Intellect and Emotions working harmoniously: Intellect Emotions 15
  16. 16. KIDS’ TURN Activity: The Six Second Pause When Life Plays Tricks Count to Six 1. __________________ 2. __________________ 3. __________________ 4. __________________ 5. __________________ 6. __________________ 16
  17. 17. KIDS’ TURN 3. Motivation for Healthy Emotions Reasons I want to have healthy emotions: 1. 2. 3. I am my child’s first teacher! 17
  18. 18. KIDS’ TURN 4. Identify Emotions in Others The ability to monitor the emotions of others, can help guide your thinking and actions. 18
  19. 19. KIDS’ TURN 5. Manage Relationships – The Adjustment Rating Scale The ability to gauge and manage emotions and emotional intensity can heighten the skills necessary to navigate difficult emotional experiences. 19
  20. 20. KIDS’ TURN I can’t tell you how much Kids’ Turn has helped me. It has opened up my mind to alternative ways of thinking about my situation. Summer, 2009 program graduate. Additional Elements Hope Optimism Future Thinking Where do I sign up for the next class? 7 year old participant 20
  21. 21. KIDS’ TURN SUMMARY Q&A 55 New Montgomery, Suite 500 San Francisco, CA 94105 Phone: (415) 777-9977 Fax: (415) 777-f1577 Claire N. Barnes, MA Executive Director Over 17,000 Participants Since 1988