10 creative uses for an empty patron bottle

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I am a staunch believer in recycling...

I am a staunch believer in recycling...

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  • 1. Ten creative uses for an empty Patron bottle
  • 2. 1. Classy decanter The perfect complement to your collection of Lalique, Baccarat, and Waterford. Or decanting that bottle of plonk you’ve been saving for a special occasion.
  • 3. 2. Designer flower vase Blends perfectly with both traditional and modern decors. Guaranteed to make you the envy of all your friends!
  • 4. 3. Second-chance candle snuffer Ever snuff a candle and then regret doing so? This user- friendly device ensures you have almost 20 seconds in which to change your mind!
  • 5. 4. No-skid doorstop Why look for an old brick when you already have this beautiful, machine-crafted objet d’art?
  • 6. 5. Scissor-holder desk accessory Tired of always searching for your scissors? This is the ideal way to keep your desktop organized.
  • 7. 6. Cost-effective tuba mute Too much oomph in your om-pa-pa? Tuba mutes are scarce these days, so why search eBay when you can easily bottle up your tooting?
  • 8. 7. Heavy-duty windchime Just the thing during hurricanes and typhoons. And beautiful to look at, too, when winds and gusts are under 70mph! Tunable using either water or cheap tequila.
  • 9. 8. Ergonomic gardening stool Balancing on this stool lets your body find its own center of gravity, reducing lumbar pressure to reduce skeletomuscular pain.
  • 10. 9. Home condom inflater Inflating a condom used to require the services of a skilled professional. Now you can easily do it at home! Just put a little water in the bottle, slip on the condom, boil gently in a pot and voilá!
  • 11. 10. Never-fail flyswatter 100% effective when correctly applied.
  • 12. Dedicated to The Texas Tequila Queens Copyright © 2014, Eric L. Reiss. All rights (and lefts) reserved. (but who the hell would want to copy this anyway?)