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What they-didnt-tell-you-about-teaching-1230652640073685-2

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    What they-didnt-tell-you-about-teaching-1230652640073685-2 What they-didnt-tell-you-about-teaching-1230652640073685-2 Presentation Transcript

    • What they didn’t tell you
    • About teaching
    • Twas the night before term starts
    • And all through the house
    • Not a creature will be stirring
    • Except you still marking
    • Whilst your friends have a life
    • You won’t!
    • You suddenly find yourself saying
    • “ I can’t not on a school night”
    • “ Friends become distant acquaintances
    • That you catch up with Christmas and Birthdays
    • You find yourself telling people the same thing in three different ways
    • When it’s the end of term When it’s the end of term
    • You won’t be doing this
    • You will be doing this
    • Or this
    • Teaching is like being a comedian
    • Your audience expects to be entertained
    • So expect heckling at every opportunity
    • Punters to talk over you
    • Continual trips to the loo
    • The aroma of stale B.O.
    • Rustling of stashed crisp packets
    • And if you are really nervous
    • They CAN smell your fear
    • And will turn into this
    • You must always be positive
    • Even when you want to do this
    • When you go shopping
    • Spotting you will be the highlight of their day
    • Except they don’t want your autograph
    • They are just amazed you are actually a real person
    • If you are really hated or loved it will like having your own paparazzi
    • With your shopping trip documented on You Tube
    • So drive 40 miles away if you want any of these
    • Or these
    • And you will need to find alternatives to swear words Fudge it! Shoot Oh Billiards
    • And learn a whole new version of the English language You gypsy Chav That’s so gay Minger
    • But there are positives!
    • You get to watch interesting student debates
    • Attend inspiring meetings
    • Enjoy the thrill of not being listened too all day
    • Being spoken to like a piece of …
    • Endure teenage hormones that even parents don’t want to put up with
    • Have your performance constantly measured
    • But the ultimate in pleasure has to be . .
    • Just when you get teaching sussed out
    • You get a new Government initiative
    • That was ditched 15 years ago for what reason?
    • So why teach?
    • For love?
    • For respect?
    • For money?
    • The excellent pension?
    • NO ?
    • Well there is a credit crunch!
    • And finally what do you call a group of like minded teachers?
    • A whinge!
    • Jacqueline Hicks © 2008 [email_address]