Positive Adolescents And those who help Us Persevere
KevinWhen I was about six or seven my father died. This was either the worst or best thing that ever happened to me. In fact, now that I think about it, it was both. That experience was both my blessing and my curse. It's not like I was saddened by the event. I hardly knew my father. His memory only survives in my head because of three scenarios: the way his coarse mustache pricked my cheek when he kissed me, the short collect calls he made from the correctional facility, and the photos that my mother keeps under her bed. After his death my mother became incredibly detached. She became a mere exoskeleton of her former self. With a deeply depressed mother who basically stopped living, I had no choice but to take care of myself. I became as self-reliant as possible. There was no more time for childhood. I was all about business. Thanks to the death of my father, I learned to value independence, hard work, and maturity. This is my blessing. Thanks to the death of my father I grew up much too fast and never learned how to ask anyone for help. I carry my own burdens . . . alone. This is my curse. The Book: "Class Pictures“ By. . DawoudBey, Jock Reynolds, Taro Nettleton, Carrie Mae Weems
Bethany Hamilton http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isjY34VD5jE
Reasons why authoritative parenting might be related to positive child outcomes.
Courtney and her mom
Authoritative parenting and school achievement is not consistent across families from diverse ethnic and socioeconomic backgrounds.
Mentors “Ninety percent of life is just showing up.”-Woody Allen What do mentors look like? “natural” mentors- a mentor not assigned by a mentor program- someone like a coach, or other influential adult frequently involved in the adolescent’s life. Mentors improve the sense of self in the adolescent. Sense of self is the self evaluations of the adolescent in his or her progress in 3 specific areas: identity, independence, and peer relationships. Adolescents are more likely to name people they know as their heroes, such as a mentor, instead of someone they don’t know. Mentors help teens learn to manage their time, become effective leaders, accept responsibility, and other things that would be greatly appreciated in the adult world.
Romantic Relationships Dating can be a form of recreation, a source of social status and achievement, an aspect of socialization, a context for learning about intimacy and sexual experimentation, a source of companionship, or also a means of mate sorting. 3 stages of romantic relationship development in adolescence Emotions from dating can totally take over an adolescents’ life. Sometimes positively, or sometimes negatively. These can change at any time. Tradeoff for most adolescents when faced with a dating relationship.
Continued… 2 types of love: Romantic love,(also known as passionate love) which involves sexuality and infatuation. Affectionate love is love that endures over time. This is more common in middle and late adulthood. The Developmental construction view emphasizes that relationships with family, friends, and peers influence romantic relationships that the adolescent constructs. Dating is more of an interpersonal experience for girls, and it is more of a physical attraction for boys.
Peers Peers can effect adolescents’ achievement through social goals, social comparisons, and peer status. (Not just academic goals but social also) (Wentzel 2009) Adolescents often compare themselves with their peers on where they stand academically and socially. Adolescents who are more accepted by their peers and who have good social skills often do better in school and have positive academic achievement motivation (Rubin, Bukowski, and Parker, 2006) Rejected adolescents, especially those who are highly aggressive, are at risk for a number of achievement problems, including getting low grades and dropping out of school. (Dodge, Coi, and Lynam, 2006) Having aggressive-disruptive friends in adolescence was linked to a lower likelihood of graduating from high school. ( Veronneau and others 2008)
Extra Curricular activities More than 30 million high school children participate in organized sports Sports- increase self esteem, teach responsibility, discipline, time management, dedication Girls seem to be more involved than boys in clubs Boys seem to be more involved than girls in sports
Reasons for Dropping out Parent Dies 100 Parents Divorce 73 Parents Separate 65 Parent Travels as part of a Job 63 Parent Remarries 50 Parents Reconcile 45 Mother goes to Work 45 School Difficulties 39 Threat of Violence at School 31
Drew Senior Photo Kristina and friends at graduation