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Know Before You Go

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What you need to know before you leave a marriage

What you need to know before you leave a marriage


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  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • myDivorceBootCamp.ca 12/04/12 Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
  • Transcript

    • 1. Know Before You Go The Marriage is Over Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 2. Know Before You Go This Seminar will help a leaving spouse to understand the many issues: Legal, financial, and emotional – that arise from the decision to move out.   Considering these issues will help leaving spouses make the best decisions possible for all concerned. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 3. Know Before You Go Don’t leave unless absolutely necessary. Figure out the finances. Prepare for parenting apart. Itemize the assets and the debts. Gather resources. Assemble the team. Educate yourself. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 4. Know Before You Go Lawyers Says Don’t leave unless absolutely necessary. Problems: Staying, Can be the root of higher conflict Leaving, May create a power imbalance Solutions: Control your emotions , get help Have patience, A separation may take years (with or without lawyers) Your ex maybe in denial Talk in terms of your new life with your spouse Personal decision Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 5. Know Before You Go Figure out the finances. Develop a living apart personal budget Can you afford to move out now ? Establish Your own Banking, Accounts, Credit Cards. No Credit ? Apply to: Home Trust Visa Peoples MasterCard CapitalOne MasterCard Use online banking Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 6. Know Before You Go Prepare for parenting apart. Develop a Parenting Plan More then just a visitation schedule Deal with the fears of ex-spouse about the children Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 7. Know Before You Go Itemize the assets and the debts. Use asset tracking approach Get Documentation. Document, Document, Document In Court if you cannot prove it you lose it Litigated Divorces are won and lost on Documentation. Following this will save your tens of thousands in legal costs. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 8. Document, Document, Document MAIL: Review all mail coming into your house and make a list of the sender and return address. It is very important to know the address of stockbrokers, insurance companies, credit issuers, banks, and revenue properties, COPY THESE DOCUMENTS. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 9. Document, Document, Document PERSONAL MATTERS: Have your mail sent to an address other than the Matrimonial Home for your privacy and to ensure that you receive it. For example, a post office box or home of a close friend or relative. File a change of address notice with the post office. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 10. Document, Document, Document FAMILY FINANCES: Review all monthly bank statements and brokerage statements, credit card statements, property assessments, and COPY THESE DOCUMENTS. Give copies of necessary documents in safekeeping outside the home Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 11. Document, Document, Document TAX RETURN: Review all tax returns that have been filed by you and your spouse. Demand an explanation as to any item, which may be questionable before signing. Make complete copies of tax returns for the last several years. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 12. Document, Document, Document TAXES OWED: Be certain that all taxes owed to the Federal Government or other taxing agencies are paid to date. IF NOT COPY NOTICES OF ASSESSMENT. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 13. Document, Document, Document SAFE DEPOSIT BOX: Inventory and review the contents of any safe deposit box. List the contents including cash and jewelry. Be sure that all safe deposit boxes are in joint names. TAKE PHOTOGRAPHS AND COPIES OF THE CONTENTS. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 14. Document, Document, Document BUSINESS INTERESTS: Be familiar with your spouse’s business interests. Become involved and be aware of financial information regarding the business by getting full information on the business, including bank documents, loan applications, corporate tax returns and financial statements. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 15. Document, Document, Document MATRIMONIAL ASSETS: Do not transfer, sign, or make a gift of marital assets in joint names. Credit cards in joint names may discourage large personal purchases by one party. Conversely, you may wish to cancel credit cards to prevent large purchases by your spouse without your permission. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 16. Document, Document, Document PENSION PLANS: Obtain copies of your pension plan and your spouse’s also with any yearly statements and determine when they vest and benefits become payable, ask for the plan booklets and latest contribution statements. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 17. Document, Document, Document WILLS AND TRUSTS: Obtain copies of any wills or trust agreements and be involved in any estate planning. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 18. Document, Document, Document LOANS: Review and make copies of all loan documents, mortgage applications, and financial statements. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 19. Document, Document, Document SIGNATURE: Do not sign any financial statements if blank. Know what you are signing and always keep a copy. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 20. Planning MEDICAL: Have a complete medial and dental check up. Be sure that you have medical and dental insurance (if available) in the event of separation. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 21. Document, Document, Document CANADA PENSION PLAN: Obtain Canada Pension Plan statements. Available at Service Canada – online or in office Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 22. Gather Resources Planning SAVINGS AND PERSONAL FINANCES: Separation generally causes immediate economic hardship. Put away cash or keep money in traveler’s checks in order to be able to purchase personal necessities in the event of a separation. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 23. Gather Resources AUTOMOBILE: Be sure that your automobile is in good working condition and that it is titled jointly or in your sole name. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 24. Document, Document, Document INSURANCE: Review and make copies of all insurance policies relating to the matrimonial residence furnishings, or other assets. This should include any jewelry, silverware, or other valuable. Make copies of any appraisal that have been prepared. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 25. Gather resources INDEBTEDNESS: Do not create any additional debts and make no large purchases such as a new boat or car. Keep your assets as liquid as possible Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 26. Document, Document, Document LIABILITY: Prepare a complete list of all debts or obligations including credit cards, notes, mortgages, etc. Identify each debts, when it was incurred and the reason for the debt. Identify who has been making payments on them, as well as the monthly or annual amounts. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 27. Document, Document, Document ASSETS: Prepare a complete list of all assets in your name and your spouse’s. Include whether the assets are held individually or jointly and the source of the assets, whether inherited, gifted, or in the name of a third party on your behalf. It is important to determine whether the assets were acquired prior to or during the marriage. Make copies of any documents which show the details and values of all assets and debts Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 28. Document, Document, Document INHERITANCES: Keep all inheritances separate from the marital estate. Do not put an inheritance into joint names and do not use proceeds to pay for family expenses or purchases or to pay down debts. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 29. Document, Document, Document EMPLOYMENT: Do not quit work if you are employed. It is important to secure your future financial independence and earn enough to maintain assets such as your home and car. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 30. Document, Document, Document RESIDENCE: DO NOT MOVE OUT of the family residence without first discussing it with your lawyer. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 31. Good for Happy Marriage Actually, these are good recommendations for EVERYBODY, even in the happiest marriage. Don’t wait for divorce to be involved in your own life Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 32. Assemble the team. DIVORCE FINANCIAL PROFESSIONAL: A Certified Divorce Financial Analyst™ helps clients determine the short term and long-term financial impact of any proposed divorce settlement. Pre–divorce, they can provide you with a thorough knowledge and understanding of the implications of the decisions you will make with respect to your assets and liabilities. They also provide valuable information on all financial issues that are related to the divorce, such as tax consequences. A Divorce Finance specialist will help to empower you to make educated financial decisions during divorce negotiations. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 33. Assemble the team LAWYERS: Family lawyers represent the interests of ONE party in the case of a divorce. A family lawyer informs clients of their legal rights and of the laws of divorce. They handle the termination of their clients marriage through negotiation with another lawyer or often through litigation and produce a legal agreement with respect to matrimonial property and support. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 34. Assemble the team MEDIATORS: Mediation is a conflict-resolution process in which an impartial third party (the mediator) helps the participants in negotiating a consensual, informed and fair agreement. Decision–making rests with the parties throughout. The mediator assists the parties in identifying issues and information needs, reducing obstacles to communication, exploring alternatives and focusing on the needs and interests of those who it is agreed are affected. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 35. Assemble the team THERAPIST: A psychologist studies how we think, feel and behave from a scientific viewpoint and applies this knowledge to help people understand, explain and change their behavior. They know how to help people deal with their feelings and attitudes and develop healthier and more effective patterns of behavior. They support people in their emotional divorce and help people towards divorce recovery. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 36. Assemble the team Divorce Coach Divorce Coaching is a powerful partnership which focuses on the client taking action toward the recovery and moving on after a divorce.  Divorce Coaches are in demand by anyone who has had a divorce whether they are just thinking about divorce or have been divorced for months, years or decades.  Divorced people are using coaches to help them through the mourning and recovery process, to bring out their best, help them create the rest of their lives for themselves and their families. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 37. Assemble the team Parenting Coach A Parenting Coach provides individual guidance and assistance to a parent who wishes to more positively contribute to the Parenting Partnership and/or more effectively manage their response to negative parenting behaviors. Assistance may focus on: improving communication, making successful transitions, creating reasonable boundaries, addressing a sensitive topic and managing the impact of a new spouse. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 38. Educate yourself Visit the Family Law Resource Centre Join a support group; DivorceCare Read Books Read Divorce Parenting Studies Educate yourself to alternatives to the Litigated Divorce Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 39. Lawyer Advice Consultation vs Retainer Legal Shield Services Family Law Resource Centre (Court House) Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 40. Selecting a Lawyer - 4 Tips Just as there is no “one size fits all” process choice for divorce (collaboration, mediation, litigation), there is definitely no “one size fits all” lawyer for your divorce. The lawyer you choose will depend on the process you hope to use, so that’s the decision you need to make first. Once you have done your homework and have a picture of what is best for you and your family in terms of process, here are the Four Tips to consider when deciding on the best lawyer for you: Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 41. Selecting a Lawyer - 4 Tips 1. Fees. Lawyer’s fees aren’t cheap, but the hourly rate should not be the determining factor either. And a word to the wise here — a higher priced lawyer does not necessarily insure better results for you. Most lawyers fees range from $100 an hour to as much as $1,000 a hour, depending on where you live. Do some investigation in your area and determine the typical hourly rate for divorce lawyers. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 42. Selecting a Lawyer - 4 Tips 2. Experience. For the best and most efficient results, find a lawyer who specializes in family law, or who at least spends the majority of his or her practice in this area. This is important because an experienced divorce lawyer will know the tendencies of the various judges and other divorce lawyers in your area. You also want someone who has a good working relationship with the judges and other lawyers. A lawyer with expertise in family law will be able to offer you clear explanations of your process choices and be able to answer your burning questions in a way that will make sense to you. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 43. Selecting a Lawyer - 4 Tips 3. Referrals. This is probably the most common way clients come to me, as referrals from other clients or other professionals in the area. If you don’t know who to go to (the phone book will probably confuse you even more!), ask a friend, a co-worker, a therapist, a minister, priest, rabbi, or a financial advisor for a recommendation. Hearing what others have to say will help you decide who you would like to see for a consultation. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 44. Selecting a Lawyer - 4 Tips 4. Good Fit and Accessibility Factor. Finally, and perhaps most important, is that you have a good connection with the lawyer you choose. You won’t know this until you actually have a consultation with that lawyer and have the opportunity to ask your questions and see how you feel about the responses. You should know after your consultation whether you feel like you and this lawyer will work well together. If you aren’t sure, keep looking. Whatever you do, don’t think about hiring a lawyer just because of their reputation. Always have a consultation and make sure it’s the right fit for you. Be proactive for your own case. Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 45. What Will Divorce Cost Kitchen Table – DIY $500 60 days Mediated - $1000 to $5000 120 days Collaborative Lawyer - $7500 to $15,000 4 to 8 months Arbitration - $40,000 12 months Litigated - $ 25,000 to $100,000 2-4 years Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389
    • 46. Keeping it out of Court Control your Emotions Patience Persistence Counselling Time Do Not React Show Love and Understanding Ken S. Maynard (877) 932-8389

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