Most people that meet now day would
probably say that I am an extrovert.
Always on show and love attention.
However, would you believe that only ten
years ago I would have been considered shy?
I used to be really shy and it was keeping me
back from doing a lot of things and meeting a
lot of people.
I was afraid to talk or introduce myself to
I was scared of what they would think of me.
If the person was a female of the opposite
sex then I was as good as useless.
There was no way I would go up and talk to
She may tell me to get lost or laugh at me.
It took a while to learn that my shyness
wasn’t about because I am a timid person, it
was because I lacked a strong believe in
myself, my appearance and my own
I was a strong believer in self doubt.
In fact it was so strong that it crippled me in
a couple of areas.
The only thing that I had going for me was I
knew that I had to change.
That need for change kept on build until I was
At that time I was overweight, long hair and
living with my parents.
My friends were all fit and health, married or
dating people and living in their own houses.
Instead of feeling like a young man that could
tackle the world, felt, and acted like a little
The problem with that was I was content to
I would have been happy to allow things to be
done for me and remained immature.
Again this was due to the lack of confidence
and shyness that I was carrying.
Fortunately, a rather nasty comment about
my weight snapped me into action.
In a period of 4 months I lost 20kgs through
walking, eating properly and a wee but of
I then decide to cut my hair.
In fact I went from hair half way down my
back to a number one.
This all made me feel better and build my
confidence, which then gave me strength to
move out of mum and dad’s place into my
I then decided to go out with some friends
one night and when they first saw me they
Some could hardly believe it was me.
Their positive comments about my looks, my
weight and even my attitude helped to build
I even had enough confidence to talk to a
I was kicking myself for taking so long to get
to this point.
I couldn’t help but think about all of the
opportunities I had lost in those years of self
I decide that that would never happen again.
I was determined to make sure that I never
hid away again and never missed another
So I came up with a simple set of questions
that can be applied to any situation.
The first is, “What will happen if I don’t do
The second is a “What will happen if I do do
In relation to a talking to a girl, if I don’t talk
to her, then I never know if she does like, or
if I had a chance to get to know her better.
Could I spend the rest of my life regretting
not just saying hello?
What would happen if I did talk to her?
She may like me and I may get to know her.
Alternately she may say she is not interested,
but at least I would know where I stood and I
could go talk to somebody else.
So I say to you, don’t let shyness stand in
Build your confidence, take chances and talk
Ask yourself the same questions I still ask
myself and start having a life you will enjoy
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