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The study of men and sexual addictions
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The study of men and sexual addictions

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Presentation by Nikki Liu, Melissa Olivas, and Lauren Wallitsch

Presentation by Nikki Liu, Melissa Olivas, and Lauren Wallitsch

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  • The cycle of sexual addiction continues to produce higher levels of shame, which in turn alienates the person to further lose intimate connections, which continues to drive the addiction. Therefore, shame, affect regulation, and sexual boundary development are the essential factors for successful treatment for sex addicts.
  • In a study, it was found that 72% had physical abuse, 81% had experienced sexual abuse, and 97% of those suffering with a sexual addiction had an emotionally abusive past sometime in their life. (Carnes 1997)

The study of men and sexual addictions The study of men and sexual addictions Presentation Transcript

  • Men and Sexual Addictions Nikki Liu Melissa Olivas Lauren Wallitsch
  • Every Second…. $3075.62 is spent on pornography 28,258 Internet users are viewing pornography 372 Internet users are typing adult terms into search engines That means by the end of this class… $33,216,696 will be spent on pornography 305,186,400 Internet users have viewed pornography 4,017,600 adult terms have been searched for
  • The pornography industry is larger than the revenues of Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix and EarthLink COMBINED ! The United States is responsible for approximately $4 billion of these sales and 244,661,900 web pages which is 24 times more than any other country.
    • Average age of first Internet exposure is 11 years old.
    • 90% of children have viewed porn by age 16. Many of them accidentally.
    • Dozens of popular children’s characters are linked with pornographic sites including Pokemon and Action Man.
  • Demographics
    • The age demographics are broken down in the graph.
    • 47% of Christian men said pornography is a problem in their home and 53% of Promise Keepers have viewed porn in the last week.
    • 20% of men have accessed porn while at work.
    • note: 28% of pornography viewers are women.
  • The Controversy: Can Sexual Behaviors be addictions?
    • In the past, a substance has generally been linked to the term addictions.
    • Opinions as well as the DSM change views frequently.
    • However, Goodman suggested that “Any behavior used to produce gratification and to escape internal discomfort can become compulsive and constitute an addictive behavior”.
    • Most commonly reported: porn dependence, compulsive masturbation, promiscuity.
    • He believed that sexual practices could become additions if they fit 2 key elements:
      • 1. The person could not control their behavior
      • 2. There are significant harmful effects that don’t deter the behavior.
  • Attitudes
    • In a study of young adults, 67% of men said that viewing porn was acceptable while 87% viewed it.
    • Further studies have shown that men are both more likely to accept and view pornography than women. Some theories believe that this is because women feel more threatened by it than males.
  • Effect of Pornography: Women
    • Non relational sexuality:
      • Men adapt to having easy access to women.
      • Achieve sexual satisfaction without concern for the women, appropriate interactions or natural attachments that would normally form.
      • 3 primary elements:
        • Objectification
        • Fixation (on a part of the female anatomy)
        • Conquest
    • Promotes objectivity of women and has been linked to many violent crimes against women.
    • It creates sexual expectations and encourages a higher frequency of sexual episodes both in and outside of a relationship.
    • Centerfold Syndrome: when men only view women for sex.
      • Men are often encouraged to have this form of sexuality.
      • The camera lenses robs the women of who she is and turns her into a picture. Sex becomes a commodity.
      • 5 problems with this form of masculine sexuality:
        • Voyeurism, objectification, masculinity validation, trophyism, fear of true intimacy
  • Effect of Pornography: Relationships
    • “ By divorcing the sexual response and experience from the natural constraints of attachment relationship, pornography elicits and enables the development of addictive dynamics”.
    • The reinforced view of sex without attachments builds a narcissistic view and habit of release without relationship attentiveness or responsiveness. It is a habit fueled by the easy access via internet.
    • Increases doubt of infidelity. Only 14% fully trust their partners which is fueled by the secrecy surrounding it.
  • The impact on the women…
    • # 1 negative effect: Trust.
      • Other effects: breakdown of essential expectations/assumptions, disconnection, general sense of being emotionally and psychologically unsafe.
      • Loss of secure attachments
      • Decrease in relationship satisfaction, sexual interest and intimacy
  • Effects of Pornography: Men
    • Pornography then defines “normal” male sexuality in which 85% portrays a man dominating over the women in violence or humiliation.
    • It teaches boys about sex, what is acceptable, what to do and with whom to do it with.
    • Tends to produce shame, guilt, depression, anxiety and an inability to function normally in a real relationship.
    • It complicates the message of how men are supposed to treat women.
    • Defines sexuality for men and may force them to fulfill desires for intimacy, closeness and connectedness through sex.
  • What Happens?
    • Sexual addiction is a process addiction.
    • Many issues and emotions lead to an addiction of sexual activity.
    • Many disorders and symptoms coincide with sexual addiction
      • depression
      • post-traumatic stress disorder.
    • Similar to a drug addiction, the male seeking pleasure continues the need to up his dosage, becoming numb to lower dosages of his sexual pleasure.
  • Cause in Teens
    • Sexual addiction in men has a large chance of developing in teenage years due to several reasons.
    • Family
      • Parent Modeling
      • Testing Parent’s Tolerance
      • Taking risks due to Family Conflict
      • Learning Symbolic Relations from Parents. (Wilder and Watt 2002)
      • Low parent monitoring in single-family homes.
    • Socially
      • - Peer Pressure
      • - Attitudes of group affect the individual
    • Exposure to abusive peer relationships is the number one cause of facilitating teen sexual frequency leading to sexual addiction. (Sussman 2007)
  • Treatment For Teens
    • There are three barriers that prevent addicts from breaking the cycle of sexual addiction:
      • “ shame, affect regulation, and an inability to maintain sexual boundaries.” (Adams & Robinson, 2001)
    • Shame has the power to make the addict feel inadequate and self-disapproving.
    • The cycle of sexual addiction continues to produce shame.
  • Figure 1: A depiction of shame from a sexually addicted client. (Adams & Robinson, 2001)
  • Cause in Adults
    • Mainly anchored in underlying emotions of shame and trauma that continue the process of the addiction. (Cox & Howard, 2007)
    • Prevalence of abuse in their lifetime
      • Emotional
      • Physical
      • Sexual (Carnes 1997)
    • Treatment must address underlying
    • causes and emotions
    • Shame originates from the abuse making
    • the person incapable of harnessing their
    • emotions
    • Attempt to use sex to soothe and regulate
    • their shame, which only leads to further
    • shame and trauma.
    • (Adams & Robinson, 2001)
  • Treatment in Adults
    • Five key issues a clinician treating shame in sexual addiction needs to address. (Adams & Robinson, 2001)
      • Understand the origin of the shame and its function in the addictive system.
      • Differentiate between shame and guilt. Shame, as opposed to guilt, is what drives the addictive system.
      • Identify the defenses the individual utilizes to deny any painful feelings created by the shame.
      • Utilize specific shame reduction strategies at crucial points in the treatment.
    • The last issue the clinician has to give attention to is also the most important. It involves changing the negative core beliefs an individual holds onto that reinforces their shame.
  • Men and Infidelity
    • Infidelity is major cause of divorce and marital conflict.
    • 26% to 70% of married women and 33% to 75% of married men have
    • engaged in infidelity.
    • Men tend to engage in infidelity
    • more than women.
  •  
  • Childhood attachment
    • Parent’s infidelity can have an affect on the child’s attachment style and models of self and others.
    • The internal working model integrates beliefs about themselves and others and forms a template for relationships throughout life.
    • The lack of nurturance and love from the caregiver can result in a negative model of themselves and others.
    • If the parents engaged in infidelity, then the child themselves will most likely engage in infidelity as an adult.
    • Children growing up in families with high interparental conflict feel less social support and have low self esteem.
    • Males with knowledge of their fathers infidelity will most likely engage in infidelity as well.
      • Fathers are seen as a role model for the son
      • Identify more with the father.
  • Precursors of Infidelity
    • Infidelity is associated with:
      • Low levels of agreeableness and conscientiousness.
      • Low levels of need fulfillment and self expansion.
    • 4 needs should be fulfilled for a romantic relationship:
      • Intimacy: self disclosure and confiding in the partner regarding secrets and personal feelings
      • Companionship: joint activities with the partner such as spending time together and having fun together that result in a greater sense of closeness.
      • Security: depending on the relationship to add predictability and contentment.
      • Emotional involvement: one’s sense of emotional connection with the partner in which the partner’s experiences feel as one’s own.
    • Self Expansion Model: Being fundamentally motivated toward the goal of enhancing the self through close relationships.
      • Sharing activities and experiences together.
    • A satisfaction in the marriage will not cause the individual to engage in infidelity.
  • Online Sexual Behavior
    • In 2004, there were 164 million users of the internet and out of all the online subjects, issues related to human sexuality remain the primary searched topic.
    • Between 20% and 34%of adult internet users have engaged in some form of online sexual activity
    • Men use the internet and participate in online sexual activity as:
      • An outlet source for coping with stress.
      • A convenient escape from life’s pressure’s.