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Couple Quiz 3: Dealing With Conflict
 

Couple Quiz 3: Dealing With Conflict

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This quiz will help you assess how well you deal with conflict and whether you are able to make repairs to your relationship during and/or after an argument.

This quiz will help you assess how well you deal with conflict and whether you are able to make repairs to your relationship during and/or after an argument.

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Couple Quiz 3: Dealing With Conflict Couple Quiz 3: Dealing With Conflict Presentation Transcript

  • Dance With Me  Quiz  3:  Dealing  With  Conflict  Dr.  Debi  Smith,  Clinical  Psychologist   www.OCChris9anCouples.com   800.705.6223  
  • Quiz  3:  Dealing  With  Conflict  This  quiz,  based  on  findings  of  marital  research,  can  help  you  get  an  idea  of  how  well  you  are  doing  in  some  vital  areas  of  your  relaConship.    Adapted  from  the  book  by  J.  GoIman:  Seven  Principles  for    Making  a  Marriage  Work  
  • Disclaimer  Please  note  that  all  informaCon  provided  is  for  general  informaConal  purposes  only.  It  is  not  a  subsCtute  for  a  professional  evaluaCon.    If  you  are  experiencing  distress,  please  contact  a  mental  health  professional.  
  • QuesCon  1  During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  We  are  good  at   taking  breaks  when   we  need  them.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  2  During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  My  partner  usually   accepts  my   apologies.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  3    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  I  can  say  that  I  am   wrong.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  4    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  I  am  preIy  good  at   calming  myself  down.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  5    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  We  can  maintain  a   sense  of  humor.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  6    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  When  my  partner  says   we  should  talk  to  each   other  in  a  different   way,  it  usually  makes  a   lot  of  sense.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  7    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  My  aIempts  to  repair   our  discussions  when   they  get  negaCve  are   usually  effecCve.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  8    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  We  are  preIy  good   listeners  even  when   we  have  different   posiCons  on  things.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  9    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  If  things  get  heated,   we  can  usually  pull   out  of  it  and  change   things.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  10    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  My  partner  is  good  at   soothing  me  when  I   get  upset.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  11    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  I  feel  confident  that   we  can  resolve  most   issues  between  us.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  12    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  When  I  comment  on   how  we  could   communicate  beIer,   my  partner  listens  to   me.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  13    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  Even  if  things  get   hard  at  Cmes,  I  know   we  can  get  past  our   differences.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  14    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  We  can  be   affecConate,  even   when  we  are   disagreeing.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  15    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  Teasing  and  humor   usually  work  to  get   my  partner  over   negaCvity.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  16    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  We  can  start  all  over   again  and  improve   our  discussion  when   needed.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  17    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  When  emoCons  run   hot,  expressing  how   upset  I  feel  makes  a   real  difference.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  18    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  We  can  discuss  even   big  differences   between  us.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  19    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  My  partner  expresses   appreciaCon  for  the   nice  things  I  do.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • QuesCon  20    During  our  aIempts  to  resolve  conflict  …  •  If  I  keep  trying  to   communicate,  if  will   eventually  work  out.     Agree  =  1  point   Disagree  =  0  points  
  • How  did  you  do?   The  highest  possible  score  =  20    According  to  research,  a  score  less  than  6   indicates  that  repair  aIempts  a[er  an   argument  are  unsuccessful  a  significant   amount  of  Cme.    
  • How  did  you  do?  If  your  score  was  below  6,  you  and  your  mate  may  benefit  from  couples  counseling  that  focuses  on  developing  more  effecCve  ways  to  deal  with  conflict.  
  • Finding  Help  •  Look  for  a  licensed   counselor  who  has   specialized  training  in   working  with  couples.  •  If  you  are  a  ChrisCan,   you  may  want  to  find   someone  who  shares   your  faith.  
  • Finding  Help  •  Schedule  an   appointment  so  you  can   both  meet  the   counselor  in  person.  •  Make  sure  you  both   feel  comfortable  with   your  choice.  
  • Finding  Help  •  A  man  needs  his  wife’s   trust  and  respect  in   order  to  be  a  good   leader  (king).  •  A  woman  needs  her   husband’s  love  and   understanding  to  be  a   good  follower  (queen).  
  • Enjoying  the  Romance  of  Ephesians  5  •  Men   –  Learn  what  she  needs   and  desires  from  you.   –  Pray  for  her  daily.  •  Ladies   –  Learn  what  he  needs   and  desires  from  you.   –  Pray  for  him  daily.  
  • Submit  to  one  another  out  of   reverence  for  Christ.  ~  Ephesians  5:21  •  This  passage  applies  to   the  body  of  believers  in   fellowship  with  one   another,  so  it  naturally   applies  to  husbands  and   wives  as  well.    •  However,  just  how   husbands  and  wives  are   to  submit  to  one  another   is  easily  misunderstood  in   our  current  culture.  
  • Submit  to  one  another  out  of   reverence  for  Christ.  ~  Ephesians  5:21  •  That’s  what  Dance  With  Me   is  all  about  –  learning  what   submission  looks  like  in  the   21st  Century.    •  Dr.  Debi  Smith  teaches   couples  how  to  pay   aIenCon  to  one  another’s   needs  and  how  to  be   responsive  to  one  another   in  light  of  his/her  unique   design  and  purpose.    
  • For  more  informaCon  …  …  or  to  order  a  copy  of     Dance  With  Me:   A  Hopeful  Roman9c  Interprets  Ephesians  5,     please  visit  our  website  at   www.OCChrisCanCounseling.com  
  • Thanks  for  taking  the  Quiz!  And  thank  you  for  inves9ng  in  the  future  of   America  by  suppor9ng  one  another!   You’re  the  Best!  
  • Dance With MeRela9onship  Workshops   Dr.  Debi  Smith   Fred  Judkins   Clinical  Psychologist   Dance  Leader