The Top 10 Signs Of Good Parenting
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The Top 10 Signs Of Good Parenting

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http://www.davidechandler.com The top 10 ways to identify good parenting

http://www.davidechandler.com The top 10 ways to identify good parenting

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The Top 10 Signs Of Good Parenting The Top 10 Signs Of Good Parenting Presentation Transcript

  • TOP 10 SIGNS OF GOOD PARENTING by Davee Chandler, MSW, LCSW http://www.DavidEChandler.com
  • #10 Great Parents Have 10 Kids
  • #10 Great Parents Have 10 Kids No! Not really! Just kidding! (Pun intended!) They may have one child or they may have more than ten. How many children they have has absolutely no bearing whatsoever on how great parents are. The point is that they have however many kids they want to have. “Want” is the key word rather than accidentally had or unfortunately had. The point is that all the kids are wanted very much. That may be one or one dozen, but they are all valued and all treasured for who they are and as members of their family.
  • #9 Great Parents Are Involved In Their Children’s Lives
  • #9 Great Parents Are Involved In Their Children’s Lives This is a good one. You can tell great parents because they are involved in their kids’ lives. They like their kids and like what their kids do! They get involved in school, in PTA, in the kids’ sports and other activities. They may be scout leaders, or soccer moms. They may volunteer to transport kids or teach kids different skills. They are often paired up with other parents in all sorts of enterprises that involve kids from drama to dance to athletics to fund raising and patriotic celebrations. Great parents do great things with great kids and have great times building great memories that last great lifetimes.
  • #8 Other People’s Kids Hang Out At Great Parent’s Homes!
  • #8 Other People’s Kids Hang Out At Great Parent’s Homes! You can tell great parents because they are involved in their kids’ lives. Ever notice this? You can tell great parents because other kids call their friend’s moms “mom”. Ever hear one kid refer to another mom as his or her “other mom”? Well, that’s a great parent. Tell tale sign, right there. Great parents have other peoples’ kids hanging out at their houses. It doesn’t hurt if you have cool stuff, but it isn’t necessary either. A 52” plasma TV in a home theatre with the latest home entertainment system is a surefire way to get some of the neighbor kids over, but I’m talking about kids hanging out in the living room or den talking with mom and dad and just chillin’. They like being there because they feel good there. There is good energy. It’s called mutual respect. Love. Light. My family calls it “good ju-ju”. They like having dinner or lunch. They feel welcome because they are welcome.
  • #7 Great Parents Talk About Parenting With Other Parents
  • #7 Great Parents Talk About Parenting With Other Parents Great parents understand that being a parent is often a pretty thankless and sometimes kind of lonely job. So, they reach out to other great parents for support and for ideas. No one parent has all the answers and in the case of parenting, more heads are definitely better than one. I think that parenting should always be something of a group project or I wouldn’t be doing this blog and you wouldn’t be reading it! So, you’re probably a pretty great parent or you wouldn’t be at this point in the article! Good for you! Anyway, great parents do talk to other parents and share ideas about what works and what doesn’t. Think of it this way. The kids have recess to plan strategies in how to work their parents. You thought they were just playing, didn’t you? No way! They’re plotting against you! Great parents spend some time talking with and sharing with each other. We need the help and support of each other. And it’s not just moms. It’s dads too.
  • #6 Great Parents Understand The Value Of Self Care
  • #6 Great Parents Understand The Value Of Self Care Uh huh. They do. Great parents understand the value of making sure that they take care of themselves so that they can take care of the kids. If they run out of gas, the car isn’t going to take the kids anywhere good. Self care must be practiced for good parenting and great parents practice it conscientiously and almost religiously. Without it, resentment grows like a cancer and can kill family relationships just as fast. Self-care wears all sorts of faces but great parents know what it means to them and they engage in it regularly and purposefully. They encourage the other parent to do the same. They also practice, when appropriate and available, care of the other parent. Tender and attentive care of the marriage is the most important relationship in any family. It must be given excellent care and nourishment for the parental efforts to be effective.
  • #5 Great Parents Laugh At Themselves And Don’t Take Themselves Too Seriously
  • #5 Great Parents Laugh At Themselves And Don’t Take Themselves Too Seriously You ever have one of those days when you feel that if you could step outside yourself and watch your life it would be like watching an old episode of the Keystone Cops or something like that? Or, is that just me? Don’t you have times when you have to laugh at yourself and your situation or you’re going to start crying or punch someone? C’mon. I know it’s not just me… Great parents have those days and not too infrequently. They have days when they just roll their eyes, tie a knot in the end of the rope and hang on. They remember that “when you’re going through hell the point is to keep going!” Don’t stop. A very wise person once said that “crisis plus time, often equals humor”. I think that great parents develop the ability to laugh at themselves and their situations before the passing of too much time. Great parents are often able to laugh at difficult situations before the passing of anytime; when they’re in the middle of difficult situations. Being able to laugh at one’s self is one of the best and greatest stress management techniques possible to develop. Great parents seem to have found it.
  • #4 Great Parents Give Ideas To And Get Ideas From Other Parents
  • #4 Great Parents Give Ideas To And Get Ideas From Other Parents This one is somewhat related to #7, but it differs a bit as well. This one refers to the unselfish ability that great parents have to teach others. When great parents find something that works or when they read a great book or article, they actually seek out and find other great parents to share it with! They also ask what the other parents have found. Frequently, without any formal intent, they create pretty efficient networks of other great parents with whom they can share—giving and receiving—information on the amazing enterprise of parenting. Great parents understand that none of us are fully prepared for parenting and that we all need help. They further understand that we all have something we bring to the table and can share with others. We all have life experience that is of worth. We all have greatness within us that others can benefit from.
  • #3 Great Parent’s Lives, Homes, And Garages Are “Busy”!
  • #3 Great Parent’s Lives, Homes, And Garages Are “Busy”! OK. Now, notice I didn’t say “messy”. I said “busy”. I don’t want to offend anyone here. But, I will say this: If you have a house with a bunch of happy kids around, and you are a great parent that likes being a parent, unless you can afford and have hired a team of professionals to tidy up for you, you probably ought to have a somewhat messy house at least maybe on the weekends. OK? Now, before you get mad at me and start in on me about the merits of teaching responsible chores and work ethics and all that, I know. And, I agree. Calm down. I agree. Really. I do. But… There are, at times, things that are more important than having everything spotless when you are a great parent, in my opinion. I better move on before I get in more trouble…
  • #2 Great Parents Know How To Say “I’m Sorry”
  • #2 Great Parents Know How To Say “I’m Sorry” I could, and probably will write a book on this one. I believe that one of the most important things that any great parent can teach their children is that it is OK to make a mistake. A mistake is a chance to learn. Period. Great parents help their children learn this by allowing their kids to know that they, as moms and dads make mistakes. Being a parent is a very powerful position and coming down off the pedestal that our young children put is on is surprisingly difficult. It is also surprisingly refreshing and freeing when we allow ourselves to come down. Some of the times when I have felt closest to my kids of all ages is when I have been the most penitent and most able to say, “I’m sorry”. Kids are unbelievable forgiving and willing to assist us in our learning as parents. They’re extremely willing to help us learn and are exceptional teachers if we will but allow them the opportunity found in saying, “I’m sorry”. Give it a try. Hint: You have to mean it. Kids can spot a fake or a hypocrite a mile away.
  • #1 Great Parents Like Being Parents
  • #1 Great Parents Like Being Parents Huh? That’s it? Yup! That’s it! Believe it or not, that’s even according to research! Most research comes down to this basic fact. If you can say that you enjoy your family and like your kids, you’re doing a pretty great job and are, in all likelihood, a great parent. So, if you can think of your family with a smile—and a hint of a furrow in your brow —you’re probably in pretty good shape.
  • For more great info on parenting, be sure to check out Davee’s page on Family photo on front page used under Creative Commons License from http://www.flickr.com/photos/ericsurfdude/
  • For more great info on parenting, be sure to check out Davee’s page on http://www.FaceBook.com/DaveeChandler Family photo on front page used under Creative Commons License from http://www.flickr.com/photos/ericsurfdude/