The Communication Gym® Handling Conflict with Style

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This program reviews communication styles and their responses during conflict. Using the DISC model as a map for understanding communication styles in conflict, this program will help you to build an approach strategy that will improve your effectiveness in handling conflict.

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The Communication Gym® Handling Conflict with Style

  1. 1. <ul><li>Continuously improving the quality of life by consistently improving the quality of communication. </li></ul>Handling Conflict with Style
  2. 2. <ul><li>By engaging in this program you will… </li></ul><ul><li>Understand the differences of four basic communication styles </li></ul><ul><li>Acknowledge your own natural communication style </li></ul><ul><li>Recognize the styles of those you work closely with </li></ul><ul><li>Understand the common blind spots of each style </li></ul><ul><li>Understand the basic approach strategy for each style in conflict </li></ul>Learning Objectives The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  3. 3. <ul><li>By completing the exercises in this program you will… </li></ul><ul><li>Recognize communication styles in conversation </li></ul><ul><li>Adapt your own style to build rapport with others </li></ul><ul><li>Articulate YOUR preferred conflict strategy </li></ul><ul><li>Articulate an approach strategy for each of the four styles in conflict </li></ul>Skills to Develop The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  4. 4. <ul><li>DISC IS NOT: A measure of intelligence </li></ul><ul><li>DISC IS NOT: A measure of values </li></ul><ul><li>DISC IS NOT: A measure of skills and experience </li></ul><ul><li>DISC IS NOT: A measure of education or training </li></ul><ul><li>DISC IS NOT: THE TERRITORY </li></ul>Understanding the DISC Model The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  5. 5. <ul><li>DISC IS: A measurement of observable behaviors </li></ul><ul><li>DISC IS: A neutral language </li></ul><ul><li>DISC IS: A universal language </li></ul><ul><li>DISC IS: A framework for understanding </li></ul><ul><li>DISC IS: A VALIDATED MAP </li></ul>Understanding the DISC Model The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  6. 6. Handling Conflict with Style Task Oriented People Oriented Extrovert Dominance Influence Assertive Needs Driven Behavior Challenge Needs Driven Behavior Verbalize Body Language Leaning forward, sharp hand gestures Body Language Expressive, big gestures Pace of Speech Fast Pace of Speech Fast Strengths Decisiveness, achievement Strengths Popularity, fun Weaknesses Insensitivity, intimidation Weaknesses Distraction, lack of follow through Response to Conflict Fight Response to Conflict Flight Introvert Compliance Steady Needs Driven Behavior Rules/Data/Procedures Needs Driven Behavior Accommodate Body Language Little or no gestures, direct eye contact Body Language Leaning back, small gestures, less eye contact Pace of Speech Slow Pace of Speech Slow Strengths Completeness, accuracy Strengths Considerate, inclusive, diligent Weaknesses Insensitivity, inflexibility Weaknesses Indecisiveness, acceptance of status quo Response to Conflict Avoid Response to Conflict Accommodate Passive
  7. 7. <ul><li>Be clear, specific and to the point </li></ul><ul><li>Stick to business </li></ul><ul><li>Come prepared with all materials in well organized package </li></ul><ul><li>Present the facts logically and present efficiently </li></ul><ul><li>Ask specific (preferably “what”) questions </li></ul><ul><li>Provide alternatives and choices for making their own decisions </li></ul><ul><li>Provide facts and figures not opinions </li></ul><ul><li>If you disagree, take issue with the facts </li></ul><ul><li>Provide a win/win opportunity </li></ul><ul><li>Motivate and persuade by referring to results </li></ul><ul><li>Don’t direct or order </li></ul>Communicating with the Dominate Style The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  8. 8. Communicating with the Influence Style <ul><li>Plan interaction that supports their dreams and intentions </li></ul><ul><li>Allow time for relating and socializing </li></ul><ul><li>Talk about people and their goals </li></ul><ul><li>Focus on people and action; details in writing </li></ul><ul><li>Ask for their opinion </li></ul><ul><li>Provide ideas for implementing action </li></ul><ul><li>Use enough time to be stimulating and “fun” and fast moving </li></ul><ul><li>Provide testimonials from people they feel are important or prominent </li></ul><ul><li>Offer special immediate and extra incentives for their willingness to take risks </li></ul>The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  9. 9. Communicating with the Steady Style <ul><li>Start with personal comments, break the ice </li></ul><ul><li>Show sincere interest in them as people </li></ul><ul><li>Present your case logically, softly, non-threateningly </li></ul><ul><li>Patiently draw out their personal goals and ideas </li></ul><ul><li>Ask specific (preferably “how”) questions </li></ul><ul><li>Move casually, informally </li></ul><ul><li>If the situation impacts them personally, look for hurt feelings </li></ul><ul><li>Provide persona assurances and guarantees </li></ul><ul><li>If a decision is required of them, allow them to think </li></ul>The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  10. 10. Communicating with the Compliant Style <ul><li>Prepare your case in advance </li></ul><ul><li>Approach them in a straight-forward, direct way </li></ul><ul><li>Use a thoughtful approach; build credibility by looking at all sides of each issue </li></ul><ul><li>Present specifics; do what you say you can do </li></ul><ul><li>Draw up an “Action plan” with scheduled dates and milestones </li></ul><ul><li>Take your time, but be persistent </li></ul><ul><li>If you disagree, prove it with data and facts or testimonials from respected people </li></ul><ul><li>Provide them with the info and the time they need to make a decision </li></ul><ul><li>Allow them their space </li></ul>The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  11. 11. <ul><li>Take a moment to assess your own natural communication style based on what you have learned so far. Page 13 of your workbook has a spot for you to choose what you feel is your natural communication style. </li></ul><ul><li>Then take a moment to assess some of the people closest to you at work. Make a list of the five people you work with most frequently and try to determine their natural communication style. </li></ul><ul><li>Finally, engage in some discussion with those who have studied this program. Ask them to share their perceived natural style and to give you feedback on what your natural style may be. </li></ul>Exercise The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  12. 12. <ul><li>Let’s take a moment to understand the common responses to conflict based on communication style. Remember: </li></ul><ul><li>DISC is a map, it is not the territory! </li></ul><ul><li>When you make a respectful effort to adapt your style and remain open to feedback you will build relationships. </li></ul><ul><li>Skill comes with practice. </li></ul>Styles in Conflict The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  13. 13. Dominate Style in Conflict The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style Do’s : Don’ts: Be clear, specific, brief and to the point Talk about things that are not relevant Stick to business Leave loopholes or cloudy issues Be prepared with support material Appear disorganized Speak clearly and with conviction Make it personal – stick to the issue
  14. 14. Influence Style in Conflict The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style Do’s: Don’ts: Provide a friendly environment Be curt, unemotional, or overly angry Put details in writing Control the conversation completely Ask “feeling” questions Stay strictly to the facts and figures Ask for their opinion Charge immediately into the issue
  15. 15. Steady Style in Conflict The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style Do’s: Don’ts: Begin with personal discussion Rush headlong into the issue Present your case in a soft tone Use abrasive language or tonality Encourage their input, ask questions Force them to respond too quickly Discuss people and emotion Challenge them or be too pushy
  16. 16. Compliant Style in Conflict The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style Do’s: Don’ts: Prepare your case in advance Be giddy or too informal Provide support material Be overly optimistic or unrealistic Be accurate and know your material Be disorganized or messy Stay on track Get distracted or stray from your key points
  17. 17. <ul><li>Based on what you have learned so far, what is YOUR approach strategy. In other words, if given the choice how would you want others to approach you when there is a situation that could cause conflict. Choose a few of the options given in the presentation OR choose your own options. Choose at least three ways in which others could approach you that would minimize tension based on style. Line number two on page 13 of your workbook gives you space to fill out your approach strategy. </li></ul><ul><li>Once you have selected an approach strategy, discuss it with others on your team who have been through the program. Ask them to share their approach strategy as well, so that you may both better understand the best way to approach each when stakes are high and relationship is at risk. </li></ul>Building YOUR Approach Strategy The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  18. 18. <ul><li>Now go through the other styles on page 13 and write down three or four ways in which you can adapt to better facilitate effective discussion in conflict. Choose ways that will decrease tension based on style and keep the conversation focused on content and effective resolution. The remainder of page 13 provides space for you to create approach strategies for styles that are different from yours. </li></ul>Building an Approach Strategy for different styles The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style
  19. 19. <ul><li>Recognize Styles in Conversation </li></ul><ul><li>Practice adapting your style to build emotional bank accounts </li></ul><ul><li>Memorize and practice your approach strategy for varying communication styles in conflict. </li></ul>Ensure your success The Communication Gym ® www.thecommunicationgym.com Handling Conflict with Style

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