Poly and single: Tips for Poly Dating

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Session given at Poly Living West, October 23, 2010. Poly dating tips from a single poly gal.

Session given at Poly Living West, October 23, 2010. Poly dating tips from a single poly gal.

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  • 1. Poly and Single Tips and Tricks for Poly Dating
  • 2. Where? @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 3. Where? Hmmm... Hot Bi Babe seeks couple @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 4. Where? @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 5. Where? • OK Cupid @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 6. Where? • OK Cupid • FetLife @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 7. Where? • OK Cupid • FetLife • Pagan events @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 8. Where? • OK Cupid • FetLife • Pagan events • Renaissance Faires @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 9. Where? • OK Cupid • FetLife • Pagan events • Renaissance Faires • Gaming/sci-fi conventions @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 10. Where? • OK Cupid • FetLife • Pagan events • Renaissance Faires • Gaming/sci-fi conventions • Burning Man @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 11. Where? • OK Cupid • FetLife • Pagan events • Renaissance Faires • Gaming/sci-fi conventions • Burning Man • Bisexuality events @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 12. Know thyself @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 13. Know thyself @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 14. Your user manual @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 15. Your user Tab A goes into Slot B? manual @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 16. User Manual: Part A Family history • Parents: relationship/major events • Siblings: relationships/major events • What are your basic traits? • What is your baggage? • What do you value in life? @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 17. User Manual: Part B How you work emotionally @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 18. User Manual: Part B How you work emotionally I need to feel... • Included • Supported • Opened up to • Understood @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 19. User Manual: Part B How you work emotionally I need to feel... Here, let me help • Included • Supported • Opened up to • Understood @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 20. User Manual: Part C How you work sexually @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 21. User Manual: Part C How you work sexually I hope he puts these in my butt! What a lovely pattern! @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 22. User Manual: Part C How you work sexually • What makes you giggle/feel weak? • Which touches turn you on? • What gestures are especially meaningful? • What is a special date for you? @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 23. User Manual: Part D What is sex? @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 24. User Manual: Part D What is sex? Wait... what?! We’re having sex right now! @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 25. User Manual: Part D What is sex? • What is your take on casual sex? • What is sex? • What are you into? • Tried and true turn-ons? • What are you willing to try? • What are your turn-offs? @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 26. Second to NONE! @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 27. Secondary’s Bill of Rights You have the right to... @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 28. Secondary’s Bill of Rights You have the right to... • spend time alone with your lover @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 29. Secondary’s Bill of Rights You have the right to... • spend time alone with your lover • spend time with your metamour @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 30. Secondary’s Bill of Rights You have the right to... • spend time alone with your lover • spend time with your metamour • spend time together with both partners @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 31. Secondary’s Bill of Rights You have the right to... • spend time alone with your lover • spend time with your metamour • spend time together with both partners • know what rules and restrictions are being placed on you (emotional and sexual) and if and when they will be lifted @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 32. Secondary’s Bill of Rights You have the right to... • spend time alone with your lover • spend time with your metamour • spend time together with both partners • know what rules and restrictions are being placed on you (emotional and sexual) and if and when they will be lifted • state and clarify your own needs and wants @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 33. Secondary’s Bill of Rights You have the right to... • spend time alone with your lover • spend time with your metamour • spend time together with both partners • know what rules and restrictions are being placed on you (emotional and sexual) and if and when they will be lifted • state and clarify your own needs and wants • expect regular STD testing @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 34. Secondary’s Bill of Rights You have the right to... • spend time alone with your lover • spend time with your metamour • spend time together with both partners • know what rules and restrictions are being placed on you (emotional and sexual) and if and when they will be lifted • state and clarify your own needs and wants • expect regular STD testing • explain what you want from the relationship @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 35. Your responsibilities • Ask about ground rules • Ask about your partners • Ask about STD testing and current forms of protection • Check in regularly @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 36. Your responsibilities Did you remember to get tested? • Ask about ground rules • Ask about your partners • Ask about STD testing and current forms of protection • Check in regularly @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 37. How to date a couple @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 38. How to date a couple No, dear, tonight we find a Hot Bi Babe! @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 39. What to do when they’re fighting @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 40. Warning signs • “She’s OK with it” • Comparisons • “She doesn’t understand that” • Life-changing decisions during NRE @cunningminx www.polyweekly.com
  • 41. Poly and Single Tips and Tricks for Poly Dating