Welcome to Day 4 of Will Stark’s Bachelor Challenge! It’s been quite longer than I expected since my last update, so I’m going to turn it over to SimLily, Arthur, and Sabriel to catch us up:
“Hello, everyone! It’s been an unexpected six—no, more than that—months since we last discussed Will’s progress in his Bachelor Challenge. I kind of got caught up with stuﬀ in our home universe.” “Don’t talk about our home universe,” Sabriel said from the background. “I’m not. I’m talking about this one. And you’re going to be talking about this one, too. I’ll need your help to recap the ﬁrst three days of the challenge.”
The ﬁrst photo went up on the screen. “Rhapsody Bohemian went home ﬁrst,” Lily explained. “I sPll don’t get how she could possibly have a score of negaPve two.” “Because she’s an incurable opPmist. Will’s pessimism might be curable, but as long as that goes on, Dee is just going to irritate Will. It’s too bad,” Arthur said. “She might have been good for him.”
“WE GOT MARIELLE KICKED OFF!” Sabriel cheered. “We rule.” “We didn’t really get her kicked oﬀ,” Lily pointed out. “Her own sense of enPtlement and her addicPon to the karaoke machine were what did her in.” “I’d sPll like to think it was us.” Sabriel sighed. “We at least had success against one Romance Sim with personality issues.”
“I thought Faye had a good chance at ﬁrst,” Arthur said. “And I thought she was cool.” “So did I. But aXer hosPliPes between her and Lilah escalated to full‐blown ﬁghPng, I don’t think she wanted to be there anymore.” Lily smiled. “You think Faye and Lilah are ever going to have the makeout session that they so clearly want to have?” “Maybe. Depends on whether they can stop with the slapping,” Arthur said.
“Now, I’m going to do a run‐down of the four remaining bachelore]es, in order of lowest to highest scores,” Lily said. “Sara Jones has the lowest score of the remaining bachelore]es. She spent the ﬁrst day and a half playing catch with her fellow bachelore]es, but started showing some interest in Will. Is it enough to stay in the game?
“Lilah Whedon only has a few points on Sara right now. She was one of the early frontrunners, but her feud with Faye has taken her eyes oﬀ the prize. In addiPon, her zodiac sign is incompaPble with Will’s, which may be posing problems.
“Lulu Buccaneer has surprisingly jumped into second place aXer nearly being eliminated on Day 2. There’s never been any doubt that she likes Will. However, their relaPonship score has always been higher on her end than his—and his end is the one that counts.
“Finally, Elaine Goodytwoshoes has been in the lead ever since this challenge started. She is the only remaining three‐bolter, and she’s had a good stalking strategy since the beginning. True love seems to be in her grasp—but the course of true love never did run smooth. Is this going to be an excepPon?”
Lily looked around. “I think we’re ready to get started with Day 4. Unless any of you have anything to add?” “I do,” Arthur said. “I’d like to start planning the post‐challenge party. There is going to be one, right?”
“Go for it. There should probably be a rocking party once this is over, and I don’t think either of us want to plan it. Right, Sabriel?” “Not me. This is up your alley, Arthur.” “Great! Into the challenge!”
Sara appears to be swooning at the thought that she actually made it to the hot tub today.
Joining her are Lulu and Elaine, who don’t seem to like talking about spatulas any more than Sara does. Sorry, Will. You’re going to have to come up with another Pme‐honored BC innuendo to discuss with these ladies.
“Apparently everyone gets immortality in Sara’s Apocalypse,” Lulu said. “I know in Sierra Plains, some people are immortal—like me—but most aren’t.”
“InteresPng,” Will said. “Where I’m from, almost no one is immortal, except the townies and Simselves.” He stared oﬀ at the door to the house for a moment. “Elaine, please tell me I’m not the only one in this hot tub who’s going to die?”
“I don’t know if I can help you there,” Elaine said. “The legacy that I’m from is almost over, so I’ll probably stay alive, too.”
If this had been the Apocalypse, Will probably would have brooded for a while over receiving this news. Instead, he brightened up. “Got to enjoy living where I am, then,” he said. “One way I can think of that.” “What?”
Lulu kicked oﬀ the post‐hot tub part of the compePPon with the ﬁrst heardart.
Today, Lulu’s strategy involves gossiping about the compePPon to try to make herself look be]er: “Did you hear about Lilah? She lost a ﬁght, and she got fat!” “Shut up. Shut up!” “It’s true. You’ve seen her.”
Next was a game of punch you, punch me. I’m pre]y sure it took a lot of coercion before Elaine chose a platonic acPvity.
But Lulu hadn’t given up on her stalking. What’s more, she remembered that the oﬃcial acPvity of the Stark family is pillow ﬁghPng.
Next up is a water balloon ﬁght. In Winterfell, this is kind of suicidal. In Pleasantview, it’s not a problem.
But it might be kind of suicidal to play with Lulu. She seems to be trying to decapitate Will at every single game they play.
CONFESSIONAL!!1! from Sara: Part of my swimsuit seems to be missing. Sorry? Wasn’t thinking when I picked swimsuits?
Meanwhile, Elaine seems to have ﬁgured out that she’s hot. Good for her. You don’t need anyone to tell you that you’re pre]y.
“Haha, I never thought I’d hear that song again. Have you been sleeping all right? I know I’m a mess if I don’t get my sleep. You’ve all seen me higng up the coﬀee machine.”
“I have actually. AcPve points. They’re a great thing.”
Elaine is wondering if Will and Lulu are done talking yet.
But poor Lulu’s sPll worried about her place in the compePPon.
“Spatulas?” Will, you were just shot down over that in the hot tub.
“I love spatulas. You can cook all kind of things with them!”
“Wait. I think that’s the ﬁrst Pme someone hasn’t run away when I’ve told a spatula joke.”
“It’s kind of cute that you keep bringing them up,” Elaine said. “Besides, you know I like talking about food.”
Meanwhile, Lulu and Lilah had retreated to the library and confessional room. “What can be so shocking about that?” Lilah remarked. “It’s not even one of the romance novels.” “It’s Marielle’s un‐redacted confessional diary.” Lulu stared at it. “I had no idea that she was so messed up.”
Will conPnued his earlier discussion of food with Sara. “All this ice cream talk is sounding really good. Want to give it a try once this challenge is over?”
“Sounds great!” Sara said. “I’d love to give it a try. It sounds great, and I’ve never had ice cream before. I guess now I could, since my niece’s jerk of a husband liXed Culinary.” “It’s great to get that out of the way, isn’t it?”
“It is,” Sara said. “Though I haven’t had to worry about them since I liXed mine. One of the perils of heirship.”
“True. We’ve only just reached the point where it’s safe to move out,” Will said. “My uncle got out of the house not too long ago.”
When Will walked into the library to share interests with Lilah, he probably was not earning any points by heardarPng Elaine.
“Sexy lamps?” Will started, using the same opening that he had with Lulu.
“NO. I AM NOT INTERESTED IN LAMPS.” Lilah ended the conversaPon.
I can’t blame Lilah for being cranky, though. AXer all this talk, she is sPll a virgin in this hood aXer four whole days.
CONFESSIONAL!!1! from Elaine: I wonder how Rhapsody is doing? We would probably be good friends in some neighborhood or other. Random confessional is random, but also accurate.
CONFESSIONAL!!1! from Lulu: I had this odd dream where Will was a teddy bear and everyone else was one of those dolls from the li@le Will Lloyd Wright dollhouses. I was sBll a human, though. I think. Anyway, that’s enough fussing over what that could possibly mean. It’s almost Bme for ﬂirBng.
CONFESSIONAL!!1! from Will: Why do we have a chess set in this house? No one’s ever played chess on it. Is it ﬂirBng Bme yet?
It was. AXer a sweet talk with Lulu, the two of them both got crush hearts for the other.
The next ﬂirt was higng on Lulu. Whatever Will said, Lulu seemed to ﬁnd it amusing.
Will was also disappointed at the low‐level tender kiss, but it’s best to save the higher‐level interacPons for later so that you can actually build up to something.
Next up: Elaine. She started oﬀ with higher‐level interacPons because she had already accepted lower‐level ones.
Caresses can be a li]le risky, but Elaine accepts.
AXer kissing, they didn’t really want to say goodbye, but it was Pme for the next bachelore]e.
Will tried to brush Lilah’s hair out from where it was glitching through her face, but she pushed his hand away.
“Really? I’m the only guy—the only person in the mulPverse you’re not interested in?” “Maybe I’d be interested. But this is all just a li]le too much monogamy for me,” Lilah said.
“What do you mean? We’re all Romance—well, except for Sara. I don’t need to get married. I just want to have fun.”
“I get having fun. If you wanted to just jump into the hot tub, I’d be up for that.” “Really?” “Yeah. But this isn’t fun.”
“Why not?” Will asked, reaching out to touch Lilah. “It could be.” “No. It’s not.” She pushed him away. “It’s ﬂirPng with everyone twice and kissing everybody once and jumping through one hoop aXer another with this darn challenge. It’s trying to pretend you’re the only a]racPve person in this whole house. I think if you want woohoo with somebody, you should just do it.”
“So this is it for you?” Will looked away from Lilah. “Yeah.”
Will had some trouble gegng that encounter oﬀ his mind when Sara came in for ﬂirPng.
But, like Elaine and Lulu, Sara did actually want to sPck around in the challenge. “I know it didn’t seem like I was that into it for the ﬁrst couple of days,” she said, “but I like you.”