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Transcript

  • 1. Purposes and Payoffs of Listening
    • Learn
    • Relate
    • Influence
    • Play
    • Help
    Purposes Payoffs
  • 2. Stages of Listening Process
    • Listening is not the same as hearing
      • Hearing is passive, listening is active
    • Five stages
      • Receiving
      • Understanding
      • Remembering
      • Evaluating
      • Responding
  • 3. Stages of Listening - Receiving
    • Hearing and attending to verbal and nonverbal
      • Focus Attention on Speaker’s Verbal and Nonverbal Cues (volume, rate, expressions)
      • Avoid Distractions
      • Focus on Speaker, Not What You’ll Say Next
      • Avoid Interrupting—maintain your role
    Microsoft Image
  • 4.
    • Learning and deciphering meaning, thoughts and emotional tone expressed
      • Relate New Information to What You Know
      • See Speaker’s Point of View
      • Ask Questions for Clarification
      • Paraphrase Speaker’s Ideas
    Stages of Listening - Understanding
  • 5.
    • Remembering and Retaining
      • Needs to take place to have listening occur
      • Memory is reconstructive, not reproductive
      • Identify Central Ideas and Major Support
      • Summarize the Message
      • Repeat Names and Key Concepts
    Stages of Listening - Remembering Microsoft Image
  • 6.
    • Judging and criticizing
      • Evaluation of the message
      • Resist Premature Evaluation
      • Give Speaker Benefit of the Doubt
      • Distinguish Facts from Inferences
      • Identify Speaker’s Biases and/or Prejudices
    Stages of Listening - Evaluating
  • 7.
    • Two Phases: during and after message
      • Support the Speaker with Back-Channeling
      • Express Support for Speaker
      • Respond Honestly Even in Disagreement
      • Own Your Responses
      • Provide a Supportive Atmosphere
    Stages of Listening - Responding
  • 8.
    • Listening is a Collection of Skills
    • All Five Stages Overlap
    • Listening is Never Perfect
    • Listening is Situational
    Implications of the Model of Listening Microsoft Image
  • 9. Styles of Listening Empathic and Objective
    • Do you need to understand, identify with speaker or hold to real world objectives?
      • Punctuate from Speaker’s Point of View
        • See as speaker does
      • Engage in Equal, Two-Way Conversations
        • Eliminate barriers (physical and psychological)
      • Seek to Understand Thoughts and Feelings
      • Avoid “Offensive Listening”
        • Looking for bits and pieces to attack with
      • Strive to be Objective, look at context
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  • 10. Styles of Listening Nonjudgmental and Critical
    • Keep Open Mind, suspend judgment
    • Avoid Filtering or Oversimplifying
      • Hear the entire message, not just the good parts
    • Recognize Own Biases
      • Don’t let your own thoughts, attitudes, culture interfere with taking it from speaker’s POV
    • Avoid Uncritical Listening
      • Listen to everything, ask for adequate info before judging
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  • 11. Styles of Listening Nonjudgmental and Critical
    • Recognize Fallacies
    • Name-calling
    • Testimonials
    • Bandwagon
    • Agenda-setting
    • Attack
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  • 12. Styles of Listening Surface and Depth
    • Surface: literal meaning
    • Depth: beyond surface
      • Focus on Verbal and Nonverbal
      • Listen for Content and Relational Messages
      • Note Statements that Refer Back to Speaker
      • Don’t Disregard Literal Meanings
  • 13. Styles of Listening Active and Inactive
    • Active Listening
      • Checks for understanding, acknowledges speakers thoughts and feelings, and stimulates speaker to further explore
      • Do this by:
      • Paraphrase Speaker’s Meaning
      • Express Understanding of Speaker’s Feelings
      • Ask Questions
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  • 14. Culture and Listening
    • Language and Speech
      • No two people speak exactly the same language
    • Nonverbal Behaviors
      • Display rules, each culture has own nonverbal vocab
    • Feedback
      • Some cultures value honesty, other value being positive over truthful
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  • 15. Gender and Listening
    • Achieve Different Ends
      • Women listen to connect, men listen to gain respect and establish dominance
    • Demonstrate Listening Differently
      • Women engage in more eye contact and give more feedback
    • Time Spent Listening
      • Men listen to women less than women listen to men
    • Differences Changing Rapidly
      • Result of socialization; two different sets of learned behavior
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  • 16.
    • Accent
    • Complement
    • Contradict
    • Control
    • Repeat
    • And Substitute For…
    … Verbal Communication Nonverbal Communication is Used to… Microsoft Image
  • 17. When Communicating Electronically...
    • People Use Emoticons
      •  
    • Keyboard Nuances
    • Text substitutions
    :-) :-( * :- >- {} {{{***}}} ;-) <G>
  • 18. Meaning Principles
    • Meanings are in People
      • You don’t receive meaning, you construct it
        • Based on your values, perception, experiences, etc.
    • Meanings are More Than Words and Gestures
      • You can only approximate what the other person means
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  • 19. Messages and Meanings (continued)
    • Meanings are Unique
        • No two people ever derive the exact same meaning
    • Meanings are Context-Based
      • Some words have different meanings in different situations
        • Fat/phat, cool/cool, hoe/ho, etc
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  • 20. Message Principles
    • Messages are Packaged
      • Nonverbal and verbal are packaged together
        • Look for a match between the two, or re-evaluate
      • Messages are Rule-Governed
        • Norms about what is appropriate, grammar
    • Messages Vary in Abstraction
      • General or abstract, some confusion can arise
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  • 21. Messages Vary in Politeness
    • Desirable Trait Across Most Cultures
    • Gender Differences
      • Women’s speech is more polite than men’s
    • How we treat strangers vs. how we treat intimates or friends
  • 22. Messages and Netiquette
    • Read the FAQs
    • Don’t Shout—ALL CAPS
    • Lurk Before Speaking or Contributing
    • Don’t Contribute to Traffic Jams
    • Be Brief
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  • 23. Messages and Netiquette (continued)
    • No Commercial Communication
    • Treat Newbies Kindly
    • Don’t Spam
    • Don’t Flame
    • Don’t Use Offensive Language
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  • 24.  
  • 25. Messages Vary in Inclusion
    • Excluding Talk - Language & Topics Not Shared
      • Another language, hushed tone, stop talking upon entrance
    • Inclusive Talk - Seeking Others’ Perspective, Providing Unfamiliar Details, Confirming Responses
  • 26. Messages Vary in Directness
    • Advantages of Indirect Messages
      • Express Desire without Offending
      • Seeking Compliments
    • Disadvantages of Indirect Messages
      • Win-lose situations more likely
      • Create Problems with Understanding
    • Gender and Cultural Differences
      • Men are more indirect when going against the masculine stereotype
      • Some cultures prefer indirect to direct language
  • 27. Messages Vary in Assertiveness
    • Nonassertiveness
      • Lack of assertiveness in all or some communication
      • “ You Win, I lose”
    • Aggressiveness
      • Care about self and not the other
      • “ I Win, You Lose”
    • Assertiveness
      • Act in best interest without infringing on the other person
      • “ I Win, You Win”
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  • 28.  
  • 29. Principles for Increasing Assertive Communication
    • Analyze Assertive Communication
    • Rehearse Assertive Communication
  • 30. Communicate Assertively
    • Describe the Problem
    • State How it Affects You
    • Propose Solutions
    • Confirm Understanding
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  • 31. Language Symbolizes Reality
    • Intensional Orientation
      • Labels First, Actual Second
        • Buy it for the label
    • Extensional Orientation
      • Actual First, Label Second
        • Meet someone and then classify them
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  • 32. Language Symbolizes Reality (continued)
    • Cultural Identifiers
      • Boy, Girl, Gay, Lesbian, African American, White, Hispanic, Chicano, Etc.
    • Allness
      • Six Blind Men and the Elephant
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  • 33. Language Expresses Both Facts and Inferences
    • Fact-Inference Confusion
      • Act as though an inference is a factual statement
        • Ex) acting on what you think, not know
    • Pragmatic Implications
      • Puts together factual conclusions to make an inference
        • Ex) sales manager gets fired
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  • 34. Facts and Inferences
    • Made Only After Observation
    • Limited to What Has Been Observed
    • Made Only by Observer
    • About Past or Present
    • Approach Certainty
    • Subject to Verifiable Standards
    • Made At Any Time
    • Go Beyond What is Observed
    • Made by Anyone
    • May Be About Past, Present, or Future
    • Vary in Probability
    • Not Subject to Verifiable Standards
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  • 35. Language Expresses Both Denotation and Connotation
    • Denotation
      • Dictionary/literal
    • Connotation
      • Snarl Words
      • Purr Words
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  • 36. Language Can Criticize and Praise
    • Providing Honest Appraisal
    • Tell the Truth
    • Consider How You Phrase Negative Appraisal
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  • 37. Language Can Criticize and Praise
    • Offering Criticism
    • Focus on Event not Personality
    • State Criticism Positively
    • Own Your Thoughts and Feelings
    • Be Clear
    • Avoid Ordering Change
    • Consider the Context
  • 38. Language Can Criticize and Praise
    • Giving Praise
    • Use I-Messages
    • Make Sure Affect Communicates Feelings
    • Name the Behavior You’re Praising
    • Take Culture Into Consideration
  • 39. Language Can Obscure Distinctions
    • Indiscrimination
      • Form of stereotyping
      • Focus on classes as opposed to individuals
    • Ethnocentrism
      • Evaluate your own culture as better than other cultures
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  • 40.  
  • 41. Language Can Obscure Distinctions
    • Polarization
      • Either/or fallacy
      • Describe the world in extremes
    • Static Evaluation
      • Retain an evaluation despite changes in that person or thing
  • 42. Language Can Confirm/Disconfirm
    • Confirmation
      • Communication pattern that acknowledges and accepts a person
    • Disconfirmation
      • Communication pattern that ignores a person’s presence
    • Talking with the Grief Stricken
      • Encourage them to share feelings, but don’t force
      • Avoid forcing them to think of the bright side
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  • 43.  
  • 44. Language Can Confirm/Disconfirm
    • Sexism
      • Generic Man
      • Generic He and His
      • Sex-role Stereotyping
    • Other “ism’s” that disconfirm
      • Heterosexism
      • Racism
      • Ageism
      • Racist/Sexist/Heterosexist Listening
        • Listening is influenced by the ‘isms’ too
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  • 45. Functions of Nonverbal Communication
    • Impression Management
        • Body size, skin color, dress, etc
    • Forming and Defining Relationships
        • Communicate closeness
        • Signal dominance
    • Structuring Conversation and Social Interaction
        • Turn-taking cues
    • Influence
        • Signals truth or deception
    • Emotional Expression
        • Revealing emotions through nonverbals
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  • 46. Body Communication
    • Body Gestures
  • 47. Body Communication
    • Body Appearance
      • Dress, skin color, hair color, etc
      • Halloween costume 
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  • 48. Facial Communication
    • Signal Emotions
    • Sadness
    • Disgust
    • Contempt
    • Interest
    • Happiness
    • Surprise
    • Fear
    • Anger
  • 49. Facial Communication
    • Facial Management
    • Intensify
      • exaggerate
    • Deintensify
      • Cover up feelings for benefit of others
    • Neutralize
      • Cover so others are not affected
    • Mask
      • Hide feelings
    • Simulate
      • Fake it
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  • 50. Facial Communication
    • Facial Feedback
    • Facial Feedback Hypothesis
      • Facial Expressions Influence Physiological Arousal
        • Feeling and expressing increases arousal
        • Influences what others think of you
  • 51. Eye Communication: Eye Contact
    • Monitor Feedback
        • “ what do you think?”, signals attention
    • Secure Attention and Interest
        • Increasing eye contact to get more attention/interest
    • Regulate or Control Conversation
      • Signals turn-taking, initiates a new speaker
    • Signal Nature of Relationship
      • Positive or negative, “gaydar”
    • Signal Status and Aggression
      • Visual dominance, stare down
    • Compensate for Distance
      • Can overcome distances, express closeness
  • 52. Eye Communication
    • Eye Avoidance
        • Privacy
        • Civil Inattention
          • Turn attention away from public argument, PDA
    • Pupil Dilation
      • What happens to the pupil of the eye
          • Interest Level: enlarged pupil with higher interest level
          • Attraction: enlarged pupil with more attraction
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  • 53. Touch Communication
    • Meanings of Touch
      • Positive Emotions
          • Trust, similarity, informality
      • Playfulness
          • Deemphasizes emotions, lightens interaction
      • Control
          • Behaviors, thoughts, feelings of another
      • Ritualistic
          • Greetings/departures
      • Task-Related
          • Associated with a task
    • Touch Avoidance
        • Avoid touch in certain circumstances/from people
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  • 54. Paralanguage
    • What is Paralanguage?
      • Rate
      • Volume
      • Pitch
    • People Perception and Paralanguage
    • Persuasion and Paralanguage
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  • 55. Functions of Silence
    • Time to Think
    • Hurt Others
    • Response to Anxiety
    • Prevent Communication
    • Communicate Emotional Responses
    • Achieve Specific Effects
    • Nothing to Say
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  • 56. Spatial Messages Proxemic Distances
  • 57. Spatial Messages Theories About Space
    • Protection Theory
        • Buffer zone around you, “your space”
    • Equilibrium Theory
        • Greater the intimacy, closer the distance
    • Expectancy Violations Theory
      • What happens as you increase/decrease distances wit someone who you are not intimate with
  • 58. Spatial Messages Territoriality
    • Primary Territories
        • Your own: room, office, desk
    • Secondary Territories
        • Don’t belong to you, but you occupy: table at the cafeteria, seat in class
    • Public Territories
        • Open to all: restaurant, movie theater
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  • 59. Spatial Messages Territoriality
    • Markers
      • Central Markers
        • Reserves your place: drink at the bar, books on your desk
      • Boundary Markers
        • Divide your territory from another’s: checkout separator, arm rests
      • Ear Markers
        • Indicate possession: trademarks, nameplates, monograms
    • Territorial Encroachment
        • Higher status people can invade the territory of a lower status person, but not vice versa
  • 60. Artifactual Communication
    • Space Decoration
    • Color Communication
    • Clothing and Body Adornment
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  • 61. Olfactory Communication
    • Attractants
    • Taste Enhancers
    • Memory Aids
    • Sources of Identification
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  • 62. Temporal Communication
    • Psychological Time
    • Past, Present, or Future Orientation
    • Future Income Related to Future Time Orientation
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  • 63. Nonverbal Communication and Culture
    • Culture and Facial Expression
    • Culture and Color
    • Culture and Touch
    • Culture, Paralanguage, and Silence
  • 64. Nonverbal Communication and Culture
    • Culture and Time
    • Formal Time
    • Informal Time
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  • 65. Nonverbal Communication and Culture
    • Monochronism and Polychronism