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Revision and Editing
 

Revision and Editing

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    Revision and Editing Revision and Editing Presentation Transcript

    • Editing and Revising Mosaics Chapters 4-5
    • Revision The revision phase occurs after the first draft Revision focuses on big picture issues – development, organization, topic sentence/thesis, unity and coherence Proofreading (or editing) is a different step
    • Topic Sentence Does the topic sentence convey the paragraph’s controlling idea?  The topic sentence MUST reflect/explain what the paragraph is about. That’s its job.  If the topic sentence does not convey the main idea, either the topic sentence or the paragraph must be rewritten. Does the topic sentence appear as the first or last sentence in the paragraph?  This makes it easier for the reader to locate and understand.  Most of the time, your topic sentence should be the first sentence of a paragraph.
    • Topic Sentence Practice I have many friends. I know that if I talk to Sean about a problem, he won’t repeat it to anyone. He’s also great to talk to because he never really tells me what I should do. Instead, he gives me what he thinks are all of my options and then helps me decide what to do. Karen, on the other hand, is a wonderful person, and I love to spend time with her. But I know she has trouble keeping a secret. She is great to talk to about small problems (things I don’t care if anyone else knows about), but not the big problems. These friends mean a lot to me. Does the underlined topic sentence express the main idea of the paragraph?
    • Topic Sentence PracticeI have many friends – Is this paragraph about the student’s many friends, or two in particular? A better topic sentence would be “Sean and Karen are two of my very different friends.” That better pulls together the point of the paragraph.
    • Development Does the paragraph contain specific details that support the topic sentence?  Broad, general statements are not convincing, and are often boring.  The more specific you are, the more your readers will understand. Does the paragraph include enough details to explain the topic sentence fully?  Make sure you have explained/discussed every aspect of your topic sentence.
    • Development PracticeWhich is better? Sarah is a talented musician. In high school, Sarah placed first in every regional and state solo flute competition.
    • Development Practice In high school, Sarah placed first in every regional and state solo flute competition. This sentence not only tells us that she is talented, it also tells us how we know she is talented, and even what instrument she plays. The reader has a much better idea about Sarah in this sentence.
    • Unity Do all the sentences in the paragraph support the topic sentence?  Sometimes it’s easy for a digression or unrelated idea to slip into your paragraph. If it does not directly support the topic sentence, it needs to be removed.
    • Reading helps bring back memories from our own lives. I never liked to read until I had Ms. Fischer. If we are reading about the thrill of McGwire’s record in home runs, we might remember a great sports event in our lives. I never liked sports, but my mom made me play soccer. If we are reading about Jules Verne traveling around the world, memories of our favorite trips might come to the surface of our minds. I liked Europe, but all I wanted to do was go home. I was also missing my girlfriend. Reading is a wonderful way to lose ourselves in the lives of others while reliving some important moments in our own lives.Which sentences are unnecessary?
    • Reading helps bring back memories from ourown lives. I never liked to read until I had Ms.Fischer. If we are reading about the thrill ofMcGwire’s record in home runs, we mightremember a great sports event in our lives. I neverliked sports, but my mom made me play soccer. Ifwe are reading about Jules Verne traveling aroundthe world, memories of our favorite trips mightcome to the surface of our minds. I liked Europe,but all I wanted to do was go home. I was alsomissing my girlfriend. Reading is a wonderful wayto lose ourselves in the lives of others while relivingsome important moments in our own lives.
    • Organization Is the paragraph organized logically?  Have you used chronological, spatial, or emphatic order?  Is this the best, most easily understood pattern for your reader?
    • Organization Practice I know that I have about three feet when I get out of bedbefore I run into the dresser. It is especially bad at night, when Idon’t have my contacts in and I have to get from my bed to thebathroom. My sight is so bad that I can’t even see three feet infront of me without my contacts. From the doorway, I then go leftand walk three steps to the bathroom. From the dresser, if I turnright, I have to walk five steps to get to the doorway of my room.If I reverse my steps and count backward, I can usually make itto and from the bathroom without breaking a toe or crashing intoa wall. Does this make sense? How could we movesentences around to make it better?
    • Organization Practice I know that I have about three feet when I get out of bedbefore I run into the dresser. My sight is so bad that I can’t evensee three feet in front of me without my contacts. It is especiallybad at night, when I don’t have my contacts in and I have to getfrom my bed to the bathroom. I know that I have about threefeet when I get out of bed before I run into the dresser. From thedresser, if I turn right, I have to walk five steps to get to thedoorway of my room. From the doorway, I then go left and walkthree steps to the bathroom. If I reverse my steps and countbackward, I can usually make it to and from the bathroomwithout breaking a toe or crashing into a wall.
    • Coherence Do the sentences in the paragraph move smoothly and logically from one to the next?  The connections between ideas may seem obvious to you, but your reader may not be able to follow your train of thought.  Use transitions!
    • Coherence Practice People should spay or neuter their animals so that we don’t end up with kittens and puppies that no one wants. A family might have a male cat that they let roam the neighborhood, and this cat might get a female cat pregnant. Who will care for the new kittens? Some people give them away or take them to a neighborhood SPCA. Some people just let the kittens roam free, hoping someone will take care of them. This irresponsible action causes more problems.Could we add some transitions to connect the ideas better?
    • Coherence Practice People should spay or neuter their animals sothat we don’t end up with kittens and puppiesthat no one wants. For example, a family mighthave a male cat that they let roam theneighborhood, and this cat might get a femalecat pregnant. Then who will care for the newkittens? Some people give them away or takethem to a neighborhood SPCA. Some people, onthe other hand, just let the kittens roam free,hoping someone will take care of them. Thisirresponsible action causes more problems,however.
    • Revision Checklist Does the topic sentence convey the paragraph’s controlling idea? Does the topic sentence appear as the first or last sentence in the paragraph? Does the paragraph contain specific details that support the topic sentence? Does the paragraph include enough details to explain the topic sentence fully? Do all the sentences in the paragraph support the topic sentence? Is the paragraph organized logically? Do the sentences in the paragraph move smoothly and logically from one to the next?
    • Editing (also called proofreading) Editing comes after revising in the writing process. Editing looks at minor issues, including:  Spelling  Grammar  Word Use  Formatting
    • Editing Checklist Does each sentence have a main subject and verb? Do all subjects and verbs agree? Do all pronouns agree with their nouns? Are modifiers as close as possible to the words they modify? Are sentences punctuated correctly? Are words capitalized correctly? Are words spelled correctly? Does your paper follow requirements made by professor? (font size, spacing, etc)