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Style in medical writing

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An old but useful exercise from Traducción 9

An old but useful exercise from Traducción 9

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  • Bryan Robinson
  • Bryan Robinson
  • Bryan Robinson
  • Bryan Robinson
  • Bryan Robinson
  • Bryan Robinson
  • Bryan Robinson
  • Bryan Robinson
  • Transcript

    • 1. Style in medical writing Bryan Robinson mailto:robinson@ugr.es
    • 2. Encargo de traducción
      • Le han encargado la traducción hacia el inglés de un artículo de investigación que se va a publicar en acceso abierto a lectores de la página web de una prestigiosa revista española de cardiología.
      • El perfil de lector de la página en inglés incluye personal sanitario no especializado en cardiología cuya lengua materna no sea el inglés. A los autores y editores del TO se les ha aconsejado utilizar un lenguaje directo y claro, libre de complicaciones retóricas. No obstante, a vd como traductor se le encomienda la redacción del TT en un estilo de estas características.
      Bryan Robinson
    • 3. Bryan Robinson Introducción y objetivos . Dado el uso generalizado del acceso femoral y del material hemostático, se plantea realizar la angiografía femoral sistemática y la hemostasia con VasoSeal-ES para determinar los predictores de complicaciones locales y de fracaso en el uso del tapón hemostático. Pacientes y método . Estudio prospectivo de 540 pacientes consecutivos con angiografía sistemática femoral con introductor, 427 con hemostasia con VasoSeal-ES, en el que se realizó un análisis de las variables paciente y anatomía en relación con las complicaciones locales y los fallos en la dispensación del tapón. Complicaciones del acceso femoral en el cateterismo cardíaco: impacto de la angiografía femoral sistemática previa y la hemostasia con tapón de colágeno VasoSeal-ES#r (Alonso and others 2003)
    • 4. Bryan Robinson Resultados . Se evidencian punciones fuera de la femoral común en el 35,9% de los casos (el 16% en la femoral profunda y su ostium), espasmo vascular en el 18% (máximo en la femoral profunda del 58,1%), nacimientos de ramas contiguas a la punción en el 11,3% y ateroma angiográfico en el 17,8%. La cabeza del fémur es referencia de la femoral común en el 63,9% de los pacientes. Los factores de riesgo de las complicaciones vasculares son: las punciones fuera de la femoral común, el sexo femenino y el fallo en la dispensación del VasoSeal-ES (el 15,8% en los primeros 2 meses de uso y el 5,2% en los últimos meses del estudio). Las complicaciones en la femoral superficial y profunda fueron del 6,7 y del 1,2%, respectivamente, frente al 0,6% en la femoral común. Las variables asociadas al fallo del tapón fueron: un peso < 55 kg, el médico dispensador y la curva de aprendizaje. Complicaciones del acceso femoral en el cateterismo cardíaco: impacto de la angiografía femoral sistemática previa y la hemostasia con tapón de colágeno VasoSeal-ES#r
    • 5. Bryan Robinson Conclusiones . Se propone la angiografía femoral sistemática para elegir el procedimiento idóneo de hemostasia y reducir las complicaciones vasculares locales. Las punciones fuera de femoral común son más frecuentes de lo esperado, asociándose a un mayor número de complicaciones. La hemostasia con VasoSeal-ES es segura y sus fallos están relacionados con un elevado porcentaje de complicaciones, que se reducen drásticamente con la experiencia. Complicaciones del acceso femoral en el cateterismo cardíaco: impacto de la angiografía femoral sistemática previa y la hemostasia con tapón de colágeno VasoSeal-ES#r
    • 6. Contrastive rhetoric (Kaplan 1966)
      • English
      • A
      • B
      • Romance languages
      • A
      • C
      • D
      • E
      • B
      Bryan Robinson
    • 7. Contrastive rhetoric (Connor 1996)
      • Spanish NSWs
      • Prefer “elaborate and ornate language
      • Use a “loose association of clauses”
      • Prefer longer sentences
      • Use fewer simple sentences
      • Write more run-on sentences
      • Use more additive and causal conjunctions
      • Use more pronouns and more synonyms
      • English NSWs
      • Use simple vocabulary
      • Use fewer synonyms
      • Avoid “flowery language”
      Bryan Robinson
    • 8. Manuals of Style for Medical Writers (Huth 1987, Day 1998, Iverson and others 1998)
      • NS writers writing for NNS readers
      • Prefer active verbs to passives
      • Identify the author with “we”, or even “I”
      • Avoid Latin-sounding vocabulary
      • Use simple sentences
      • Write more run-on sentences
      • Avoid redundancy
      • Use repetition to avoid ambiguity
      Bryan Robinson
    • 9. Guidelines for NNS translators
      • NNS translators writing for NNS readers
      • Clarify vagueness in the ST
      • Correct demonstratives or verbs with vague or ambiguous referents
      • If necessary, use repetition to avoid ambiguity
      • Eliminate rhetorical complexity
      • Use simple sentences
      • Avoid redundancy
      • Remember
      • If you need to read the ST twice to understand it, the TT reader needs even more help
      Bryan Robinson
    • 10. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Background: For securing immediate hemostasis following percutaneous arterial catheterization, the Food and Drug Administration has approved three hemostatic puncture closure devices. We reviewed our institutional experience with one device (Angio-Seal). Methods : A retrospective, single-center, nonrandomized observational study was made of all vascular complications following femoral cardiac catheterization. Results : An immediate mechanical failure of the device was experienced in 34 (8%) patients. Surgical repair was required in 1.6% (7 of 425) of patients following Angio-Seal versus 0.3% (5 of 1662) following routine manual compression (P = 0.004). In 5 patients, the device caused either complete occlusion or stenosis of the femoral artery. The polymer anchor embolized in 1 patient and was retrieved with a balloon catheter at surgery. Conclusion : During the first year of utilization of a percutaneous hemostatic closure device following cardiac catheterization, we observed a marked increase in arterial occlusive complications requiring surgical repair. Surgeons must be familiar with the design of these devices to achieve precise repair of surgical complications.
    • 11. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Background : For securing immediate hemostasis following percutaneous arterial catheterization , the Food and Drug Administration has approved three hemostatic puncture closure devices. Background : The US Food and Drug Administration has approved three hemostatic puncture closure devices designed to secure immediate hemostasis following percutaneous arterial catheterization. .
    • 12. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) We reviewed our institutional experience with one device (Angio-Seal). We reviewed our experience with one of these devices (Angio-Seal) at the University Hospital of Arkansas . .
    • 13. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Methods : A retrospective, single-center, nonrandomized observational study was made of all vascular complications following femoral cardiac catheterization. Methods : We carried out a retrospective, single-center, nonrandomized observational study of all vascular complications following femoral cardiac catheterization.
    • 14. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Results : An immediate mechanical failure of the device was experienced in 34 (8%) patients. Surgical repair was required in 1.6% ( 7 of 425 ) of patients following Angio-Seal versus 0.3% ( 5 of 1662 ) following routine manual compression (P = 0.004). In 5 patients , the device caused either complete occlusion or stenosis of the femoral artery. The polymer anchor embolized in 1 patient and was retrieved with a balloon catheter at surgery.
    • 15. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Results : An immediate mechanical failure of the device was experienced in 34 (8%) patients.
    • 16. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Thirty-four patients (8%) experienced immediate mechanical failure of the device. Mechanical failure of the device occurred immediately in 34 patients (8%). An immediate mechanical failure of the device occurred in 34 patients (8%).
    • 17. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Surgical repair was required in 1.6% ( 7 of 425 ) of patients following Angio-Seal versus 0.3% ( 5 of 1662 ) following routine manual compression (P = 0.004). Seven patients (1.6%) out of a total of 425 required surgical repair following Angio-Seal versus 5 (0.3%) out of a total of 1662 following routine manual compression (P = 0.004).
    • 18. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) In 5 patients , the device caused either complete occlusion or stenosis of the femoral artery. The device caused either complete occlusion or stenosis of the femoral artery in 5 patients . Five patients suffered complete occlusion or stenosis of the femoral artery because of the device.
    • 19. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) The polymer anchor embolized in 1 patient and was retrieved with a balloon catheter at surgery. The polymer anchor embolized in 1 patient and we retrieved it with a balloon catheter at surgery. In 1 patient , the polymer anchor embolized and was retrieved with a balloon catheter at surgery. In 1 patient , the polymer anchor embolized and we retrieved it with a balloon catheter at surgery.
    • 20. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Results : An immediate mechanical failure of the device was experienced in 34 (8%) patients. Surgical repair was required in 1.6% ( 7 of 425 ) of patients following Angio-Seal versus 0.3% ( 5 of 1662 ) following routine manual compression (P = 0.004). In 5 patients , the device caused either complete occlusion or stenosis of the femoral artery. The polymer anchor embolized in 1 patient and was retrieved with a balloon catheter at surgery.
    • 21. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Conclusion : During the first year of utilization of a percutaneous hemostatic closure device following cardiac catheterization, we observed a marked increase in arterial occlusive complications requiring surgical repair. Conclusion : We observed a marked increase in arterial occlusive complications requiring surgical repair during the first year of utilization of a percutaneous hemostatic closure device following cardiac catheterization.
    • 22. Bryan Robinson Surgical complications from hemostatic puncture closure devices (Eidt and others 1999) Surgeons must be familiar with the design of these devices to achieve precise repair of surgical complications.
    • 23. Edit the text
      • Open the file containing parallel text t9_5876_PT2.rtf and save it as t9_5876_PT2a.rtf
      • Read the text carefully and highlight any words or phrases that need editing.
      • Insert comments to explain each change.
      • Activate the CONTROL DE CAMBIOS function and make the changes. Save the file and print out a version of the text with the changes and comments visible.
      • Join 3 or 4 others and compare your edited versions of the text. Discuss the changes and justifications. If in doubt consult the reference list.
      • Repeat the process with t9_5876_PT3.
      Bryan Robinson
    • 24. Bryan Robinson Frequency and correlates of coronary stent thrombosis in the modern era. Analysis of a single center registry (Orford and others 2002) Objectives The study examined the frequency, correlates, and outcome of patients with stent thrombosis within 30 days of stent placement. Background Patients in trials evaluating stents or dual antiplatelet therapy to prevent coronary stent thrombosis have generally had narrow inclusion criteria; the extent to which stent thrombosis rates in such trials represent current practice, particularly with the availability of newer stents, is unclear Methods We performed a retrospective analysis of the Mayo Clinic Percutaneous Coronary Intervention database and identified all patients who received at least one coronary stent and dual antiplatelet therapy (aspirin and ticlopidine or clopidogrel for two to four weeks).
    • 25. Bryan Robinson Frequency and correlates of coronary stent thrombosis in the modern era. Analysis of a single center registry (Orford and others 2002) Results Four thousand five hundred nine patients underwent successful coronary stent implantation and were treated with dual antiplatelet therapy between July 1, 1994, and April 30, 2000. Stent thrombosis occurred in 23 patients (0.51%; 95% confidence interval 0.32%, 0.76%) within 30 days of stent placement. Multivariate analysis using bootstrap model selection to avoid over-fitting the model indicated that only the number of stents placed was an independent correlate of stent thrombosis (odds ratio 1.80, p < 0.001). The frequency of death and frequency of nonfatal myocardial infarction (MI) among the 23 patients with stent thrombosis were 48% and 39%, respectively Conclusions Stent thrombosis is even more rare in the current era than in earlier trials. Number of stents placed was an independent correlate of stent thrombosis. Most patients who suffer stent thrombosis either die or suffer MI.
    • 26. Bryan Robinson Abstract . A collagen hemostatic puncture closure device has been developed as an alternative to traditional manual pressure techniques for achieving effective femoral arterial hemostasis after coronary angiography. The purpose of the current study was to determine if patients receiving this device can ambulate safely at 1 hour compared with patients receiving traditional manual pressure and bed rest after sheath removal for diagnostic cardiac catheterization. Patients (n = 304) were randomized to either the device group (n = 202) with ambulation at 1 hour after sheath removal or to the manual pressure control group (n = 102) with ambulation at 4 to 6 hours after sheath removal. Efficacy and Safety of a Hemostatic Puncture Closure Device With Early Ambulation After Coronary Angiography (Ward and others 1998)
    • 27. Bryan Robinson The device group achieved earlier time to hemostasis (0.9 ± 3 vs 17.0 ± 8 minutes, p = 0.0001) and faster time to outpatient discharge (5.0 ± 4 vs 7.7 ± 4 hours, p = 0.0001) compared with the control group. There were bleeding or vascular complications in 19 patients (9%) in the device group and in 6 patients (6%) in the manual pressure group (p = 0.397). In patients undergoing diagnostic coronary angiography, this device, compared with traditional techniques for achieving hemostasis after sheath removal, allows for faster time to effective hemostasis with resultant earlier discharge from the hospital. Efficacy and Safety of a Hemostatic Puncture Closure Device With Early Ambulation After Coronary Angiography (Ward and others 1998)
    • 28. Bryan Robinson Introducción y objetivos . Dado el uso generalizado del acceso femoral y del material hemostático, se plantea realizar la angiografía femoral sistemática y la hemostasia con VasoSeal-ES para determinar los predictores de complicaciones locales y de fracaso en el uso del tapón hemostático. Pacientes y método . Estudio prospectivo de 540 pacientes consecutivos con angiografía sistemática femoral con introductor, 427 con hemostasia con VasoSeal-ES, en el que se realizó un análisis de las variables paciente y anatomía en relación con las complicaciones locales y los fallos en la dispensación del tapón. Complicaciones del acceso femoral en el cateterismo cardíaco: impacto de la angiografía femoral sistemática previa y la hemostasia con tapón de colágeno VasoSeal-ES#r
    • 29. Bryan Robinson Resultados . Se evidencian punciones fuera de la femoral común en el 35,9% de los casos (el 16% en la femoral profunda y su ostium), espasmo vascular en el 18% (máximo en la femoral profunda del 58,1%), nacimientos de ramas contiguas a la punción en el 11,3% y ateroma angiográfico en el 17,8%. La cabeza del fémur es referencia de la femoral común en el 63,9% de los pacientes. Los factores de riesgo de las complicaciones vasculares son: las punciones fuera de la femoral común, el sexo femenino y el fallo en la dispensación del VasoSeal-ES (el 15,8% en los primeros 2 meses de uso y el 5,2% en los últimos meses del estudio). Las complicaciones en la femoral superficial y profunda fueron del 6,7 y del 1,2%, respectivamente, frente al 0,6% en la femoral común. Las variables asociadas al fallo del tapón fueron: un peso < 55 kg, el médico dispensador y la curva de aprendizaje. Complicaciones del acceso femoral en el cateterismo cardíaco: impacto de la angiografía femoral sistemática previa y la hemostasia con tapón de colágeno VasoSeal-ES#r
    • 30. Bryan Robinson Conclusiones . Se propone la angiografía femoral sistemática para elegir el procedimiento idóneo de hemostasia y reducir las complicaciones vasculares locales. Las punciones fuera de femoral común son más frecuentes de lo esperado, asociándose a un mayor número de complicaciones. La hemostasia con VasoSeal-ES es segura y sus fallos están relacionados con un elevado porcentaje de complicaciones, que se reducen drásticamente con la experiencia. Complicaciones del acceso femoral en el cateterismo cardíaco: impacto de la angiografía femoral sistemática previa y la hemostasia con tapón de colágeno VasoSeal-ES#r
    • 31. Translation task
      • Prepare a draft translation of the ST and bring it to class on diskette. Save the file as t9apellido_21.rtf.
      • Save the first draft again changing the name to t9apellido_21a.rtf. Exchange diskettes with your partner.
      • Activate the CONTROL DE CAMBIOS and revise your partner’s first draft. Save the file and return the diskette.
      • Open your revised translation and activate COMPARAR DOCUMENTOS. Identify the changes the reviser has made and write down your explanations for them.
      Bryan Robinson
    • 32. Translation task
      • In pairs, discuss, explain and justify the revisions you have made to each others’ translations
      • Return to your own translation. Save the second draft changing the name to t9apellido_21b.rtf.
      • Make any further revisions you think necessary.
      • Print copies of all three drafts of the TT with the revisions visible on the page.
      • Hand in a clean printed copy of the final draft.
      Bryan Robinson
    • 33. Bryan Robinson Introduction and objectives . Most cardiac catheterizations are performed via femoral artery access, and hemostatic devices are commonly used. We evaluate the relationship between the strategy used for femoral arteriography and the use of VasoSeal-ES, and local vascular complications. Patients and method . Prospective study of 540 consecutive catheterizations with systematic femoral artery and sheath angiography. VasoSeal-ES was used in 427 patients. Predictors of local vascular complications such as patient-related factors, anatomy and hemostasis were analyzed. Variables related to failure of the collagen plug were also studied. Complications with Femoral Access in Cardiac Cathetization. Impact of Previous Systematic Femoral Angiography and Hemostasis with Vasoseal-Es Collagen Plug
    • 34. Bryan Robinson Results . Punctures of the common femoral artery occurred in 35.9% of all patients (16% in the deep femoral artery and its ostium). Spasm was evident in 18% (ranging from 58.1% in the deep femoral artery to 5.2% in the common femoral artery). Puncture at the site of ramification was seen in 11.3%. Angiographically significant atheroma was seen in 17.8%. The femoral head was a valid landmark for the common femoral artery in only 63.9% of the pateints. Risk factors for local vascular complications were punctures of the common femoral artery, female sex and failure of VasoSeal-ES to achieve hemostasis (15.8% in the first two months of use, 5.2% in the last months of the study). Complications involving superficial and deep femoral arteries occurred in 6.7% and 1.2% of the patients, respectively, in contrast to 0.6 % involving the common femoral artery. Variables related to collagen plug failure were patient-related factors, weight less than 55 kg, operator-related factors and the learning curve. Complications with Femoral Access in Cardiac Cathetization. Impact of Previous Systematic Femoral Angiography and Hemostasis with Vasoseal-Es Collagen Plug
    • 35. Bryan Robinson Conclusions . Systematic femoral angiography provides data that aids the choice of the best hemostasis procedure to reduce local vascular complications. Punctures of the common femoral artery were more frequent than expected, and were associated with a higher complication rate. VasoSeal-ES is a safe and useful method of hemostasis, and its infrequent failures were associated with high complication rates that were substantially reduced with experience. Complications with Femoral Access in Cardiac Cathetization. Impact of Previous Systematic Femoral Angiography and Hemostasis with Vasoseal-Es Collagen Plug
    • 36. Traducción científico-técnica (Inglés) T9 Style in medical writing Bryan Robinson mailto:robinson@ugr.es Thank you!

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