Bruno Sbille
Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team
members
Who is @BrunoSbille? (hint: that’s me :)
Bruno.sbille@gmail.com
brunosbille.com
Psychology...
A nice movie
about Psychology.
“Yes But”
Today we will discuss 2 tools, 2 models from
psychology
1. The V.A.K Model.
Neil Fleming
(NLP: Neuro-linguistic
programmin...
NLP: Neuro Linguistic Programming
Bandler & Grinder
NLP approach
•Observe talented people
•Identify common structures
•Model (create a model)
•Get other people to do it
Approach
Where’s the problem? < Why it works ?
Applications
Myths
V.A.K
Neil Fleming
I need you to find a buddy...
Please stand-up, create teams of 2
Once your team is created, please sit.
Five senses
VAK (aka VAKOG)
•V: Visual
•A: Auditory
•K: Kinesthetic
•O: Olfactory
•G: Gustatory
VAK or VAKOG ?
•V: Visual
•A: Auditory
•K: Kinesthetic (including
Olfactory and Gustatory)
Each of us has a preferred chan...
The “Auditory”
Auditory
•Auditory learners best learn
through listening (lectures,
discussions, tapes, etc.
•“What did you say?”
•Credibi...
The “Kinesthetic”
Kinesthetic
•Tactile/kinesthetic learners prefer
to learn via experience—moving,
touching, and doing
•Importance of sensat...
The “Visual”
Visual
•visual learners have a
preference for seeing (think in
pictures; visual aids such as
overhead slides, diagrams,
ha...
What can you do with these concepts ?
Who am I ?
Hint: Check the begin of the
presentation
Your team, your class
Communication
Message Results
Filters
Daily Scrum
Boards and Visual Management
User Stories
How to give recognition, thanks people
If you are a trainer
Want to know more
http://www.businessballs.com/
vaklearningstylestest.htm
http://www.idea-sandbox.com/
blog/2012/03/disney...
The Drama triangle
Karpman
Victim
Rescuer
Victim
Rescuer
Persecutor
Victim
Rescuer Persecutor
The Drama
Triangle
Victim
Rescuer Persecutor
Benefits...and needs
The Victim
Needs
I need a persecutor
Benefits
I attracts sympathy, I get attention
People have pity on me
The Rescuer
Needs
I need someone (complaining)
Benefits
I get recognition
I don’t have to focus on my own
problems
The Persecutor
Needs
I need a victim
I need a pretext, an excuse
Benefits
I get rid of my frustration
I feel almighty, pow...
Unfortunately, this comes with some perverse
effects...
Victim
Imagine a project where the
“victim” role is played.
The person playing the “victim”
role will absorb a significant...
Rescuer
Imagine a project where the
“rescuer” role is played. The
rescuer will make the team
dependent and passive
Persecutor
Imagine a project where the
“rescuer” role is played. It creates
fear, stress, lack of initiatives.
Risk of bla...
To summarize...
The Victim
•This is a pure human
being, innocent, helpless
•Passive, plaintive
•Full of good will, but pursued by
disaster...
The Rescuer
•Kind, generous, selfless, strong,
brave
•Trying to help without being asked
•He flees his own problems by
foc...
The Persecutor
•Wicked, cruel, heartless
can be violent
•Uses intimidation, manipulation
•Blocking the aisle of the
superm...
How to avoid, escape the triangle ?
The Drama
Triangle
Victim
Rescuer Persecutor
YOU ARE
HERE
Avoid a relation Victim - Persecutor
Facing a persecutor
•Feel your trigger
•Stay firm and focus (let him/her
live his anger)
•Don’t go against him/her
•Acknow...
The Drama
Triangle
Victim
Rescuer Persecutor
YOU ARE
HERE
Avoid a relation Rescuer - Victim
How not to play with a victim
If you can answer “Yes” to all
these questions: you are not
playing.
1: Did he/she expressed...
How not to play with a rescuer
•Decline the request for
assistance. Thank Him/her and
change the subject
•You decide of th...
And don’t forget... this is all about playing
games... you choose to play...or not ;-)
Agile2013 Talk: Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team members
Agile2013 Talk: Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team members
Agile2013 Talk: Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team members
Agile2013 Talk: Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team members
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Agile2013 Talk: Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team members

  1. 1. Bruno Sbille Tools from Psychology for coaches, trainers and team members
  2. 2. Who is @BrunoSbille? (hint: that’s me :) Bruno.sbille@gmail.com brunosbille.com
  3. 3. Psychology... A nice movie about Psychology. “Yes But”
  4. 4. Today we will discuss 2 tools, 2 models from psychology 1. The V.A.K Model. Neil Fleming (NLP: Neuro-linguistic programming) 2. The Drama Triangle Stephen Karpman (TA: Transactional Analysis)
  5. 5. NLP: Neuro Linguistic Programming Bandler & Grinder
  6. 6. NLP approach •Observe talented people •Identify common structures •Model (create a model) •Get other people to do it
  7. 7. Approach Where’s the problem? < Why it works ?
  8. 8. Applications
  9. 9. Myths
  10. 10. V.A.K Neil Fleming
  11. 11. I need you to find a buddy... Please stand-up, create teams of 2 Once your team is created, please sit.
  12. 12. Five senses
  13. 13. VAK (aka VAKOG) •V: Visual •A: Auditory •K: Kinesthetic •O: Olfactory •G: Gustatory
  14. 14. VAK or VAKOG ? •V: Visual •A: Auditory •K: Kinesthetic (including Olfactory and Gustatory) Each of us has a preferred channel
  15. 15. The “Auditory”
  16. 16. Auditory •Auditory learners best learn through listening (lectures, discussions, tapes, etc. •“What did you say?” •Credibility •Usually channel the most used •Can speak a lot to express one idea
  17. 17. The “Kinesthetic”
  18. 18. Kinesthetic •Tactile/kinesthetic learners prefer to learn via experience—moving, touching, and doing •Importance of sensations, feelings •sensible to the working atmosphere •“You feel me?”
  19. 19. The “Visual”
  20. 20. Visual •visual learners have a preference for seeing (think in pictures; visual aids such as overhead slides, diagrams, handouts, etc.) •promotes understanding •Useful to get attention •“Do you see what I mean?”
  21. 21. What can you do with these concepts ?
  22. 22. Who am I ? Hint: Check the begin of the presentation
  23. 23. Your team, your class
  24. 24. Communication Message Results Filters
  25. 25. Daily Scrum
  26. 26. Boards and Visual Management
  27. 27. User Stories
  28. 28. How to give recognition, thanks people
  29. 29. If you are a trainer
  30. 30. Want to know more http://www.businessballs.com/ vaklearningstylestest.htm http://www.idea-sandbox.com/ blog/2012/03/disney- brainstorming-method-dreamer- realist-and-spoiler/
  31. 31. The Drama triangle Karpman
  32. 32. Victim
  33. 33. Rescuer
  34. 34. Victim Rescuer
  35. 35. Persecutor
  36. 36. Victim Rescuer Persecutor
  37. 37. The Drama Triangle Victim Rescuer Persecutor
  38. 38. Benefits...and needs
  39. 39. The Victim Needs I need a persecutor Benefits I attracts sympathy, I get attention People have pity on me
  40. 40. The Rescuer Needs I need someone (complaining) Benefits I get recognition I don’t have to focus on my own problems
  41. 41. The Persecutor Needs I need a victim I need a pretext, an excuse Benefits I get rid of my frustration I feel almighty, powerful
  42. 42. Unfortunately, this comes with some perverse effects...
  43. 43. Victim Imagine a project where the “victim” role is played. The person playing the “victim” role will absorb a significant part of the team’s energy
  44. 44. Rescuer Imagine a project where the “rescuer” role is played. The rescuer will make the team dependent and passive
  45. 45. Persecutor Imagine a project where the “rescuer” role is played. It creates fear, stress, lack of initiatives. Risk of blame culture
  46. 46. To summarize...
  47. 47. The Victim •This is a pure human being, innocent, helpless •Passive, plaintive •Full of good will, but pursued by disasters. He/She annoyed others! •Blame “someone” for his/her problems •Benefits: attracts sympathy, pity
  48. 48. The Rescuer •Kind, generous, selfless, strong, brave •Trying to help without being asked •He flees his own problems by focusing on others problems •Profit: I fill my need for recognition •Makes the other passive, dependent
  49. 49. The Persecutor •Wicked, cruel, heartless can be violent •Uses intimidation, manipulation •Blocking the aisle of the supermarket with his caddy •Needs a pretext and a victim •Benefits: it evacuates his frustration (on someone) and feels omnipotent
  50. 50. How to avoid, escape the triangle ?
  51. 51. The Drama Triangle Victim Rescuer Persecutor YOU ARE HERE Avoid a relation Victim - Persecutor
  52. 52. Facing a persecutor •Feel your trigger •Stay firm and focus (let him/her live his anger) •Don’t go against him/her •Acknowledge you points you agree with •Counter Manipulation •You can leave the room
  53. 53. The Drama Triangle Victim Rescuer Persecutor YOU ARE HERE Avoid a relation Rescuer - Victim
  54. 54. How not to play with a victim If you can answer “Yes” to all these questions: you are not playing. 1: Did he/she expressed a request? 2: Am I available? 3: Am I qualified? 4: Is there an exchange?
  55. 55. How not to play with a rescuer •Decline the request for assistance. Thank Him/her and change the subject •You decide of the scope and timing of his assistance •Give him/her recognition for what he/she is and not for what he/she does
  56. 56. And don’t forget... this is all about playing games... you choose to play...or not ;-)

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