Collection of Stories & Pictures Here’s a collection of “stories” and pictures that people have e-mailed me over the last few years…

Car for sale in Ireland The following is an actual advertisement in an Irish newspaper... Automobile for Sale : 1985 Blue Volkswagen. Only 50 miles. Only first gear and reverse ever used. Never driven hard. Original tires. Original brakes. Original fuel and oil Only 1 driver. Owner wishing to sell due to employment lay-off.

Car for sale in Ireland

The following is an actual advertisement in an Irish newspaper...

Automobile for Sale : 1985 Blue Volkswagen. Only 50 miles. Only first gear

and reverse ever used. Never driven hard. Original tires. Original brakes.

Original fuel and oil

Only 1 driver. Owner wishing to sell due to employment lay-off.

Look closely at the package. Just below the words Fresco Lavado.... Don't forget this brand of fresh lettuce. What probably happened is, the water the lettuce was washed in contained polliwogs and these became fresh new frogs, right in the packages. So if you're looking for salad fixins with a little more body, then be sure and try this brand.

WHEN YOU SEE THIS ON YOUR WAY OUT THE DOOR IN THE MORNING Go back in and have another cup of coffee. It is probably not going to be a good day!

I've often been asked, 'What do you old folks do now that you're retired?' Well...I'm fortunate to have a few friends who have chemical engineering backgrounds, and one of the things we enjoy most is turning beer, wine, bourbon, and martinis into urine. And, we're pretty damn good at it too!!' Is it Friday yet? Don't We All Feel Like This At Times?

the intersection of US27 & I-471 (in MS) Gotta love this one!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Look at the plates, too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A little boy goes to his father and asks 'Daddy, how was I born?' The father answers, 'Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said: 'You got Male!'

"The Dog Knows Best" Have you ever heard that a dog 'knows' when an earthquake is about to hit? Have you ever heard that a dog can 'sense' when a tornado is stirring up, even 20 miles away? Do you remember hearing that before the December tsunami struck Southeast Asia, dogs started running frantically away from the seashore, at breakneck speed? Do you know that dogs can detect cancer and other serious illnesses and danger of fire? Somehow they always know when they can 'go for a ride' before you even ask and how do those dogs and cats get home from hundreds of miles away? I'm a firm believer that animals - and especially dogs - have keen insights into the Truth. And you can't tell me that dogs can't sense a potentially terrible disaster well in advance. Simply said, a dog just KNOWS when something isn't right .. . when impending doom is upon us . .they'll always try to warn us.... !!

WHAT TO WEAR WHEN YOUR WIFE HAS CHORES FOR YOU... OK ......... Look at it again .......... closely

Employee of the Month This is the level of dedication we expect from all staff - keep up the good work !!! Beautiful Blonde Pole Dancer If you should find it too offensive, Please advise, and I will Remove your name promptly from these type of posts! (Open Discreetly)

Redneck Condo/Mansion Halloween Moon

STRESS I am not sure exactly how it works, but this is amazingly accurate. Read the full description before looking at the picture. The picture below has 2 identical dolphins in it. It was used in a case study on stress levels at St. Mary's Hospital. Look at both dolphins jumping out of the water. The dolphins are identical. A closely monitored, scientific study revealed that , in spite of the fact that the dolphins are identical, a person under stress would find differences in the two dolphins . The more differences a person finds between the dolphins, the more stress that person is experiencing. Look at the photograph and if you find more than one or two differences you may want to take a vacation.