2011 SVCC:  Creating Influence, On Demand
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2011 SVCC: Creating Influence, On Demand

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Techniques to build rapport fast. Given at Silicon Valley Code Camp, 10/2011

Techniques to build rapport fast. Given at Silicon Valley Code Camp, 10/2011

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  • Also, Fundamental Attribution Error, Denning p. 422004 Elections; Contradictory Statements; fMRI study at Emory Univeristy; blatantly self-contradictory statementsfMRI study showed areas associated with REASONING were inactive in participantsWhile areas associated with EMOTION were lit, including conflict resolutionOnce interpretation found to support original position, brain areas of REWARD & PLEASURE lit up – leading to reinforcement of original position

2011 SVCC:  Creating Influence, On Demand 2011 SVCC: Creating Influence, On Demand Presentation Transcript

  • Rapid rapport
    Creating Influence On Demand
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    1
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • Increase communicationeffectiveness up to 5x
    What you get:
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    2
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • Would IT BE OK To SEE A DEMO?
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YcTgjR5iV1Y
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    3
  • Bernie Maloney, PE, CSMProduct Line and Program Managementmatrix management = Influence without Authority
    Neuro Linguistic Programming Practitioner
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    4
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • I’ve got good news & bad news
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    5
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    6
  • Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    7
  • outline
    Outcome: Recognize and Practice Verbal Technology to Build Rapport Fast
    • Why: Significance and Basis
    • How: Applications in Technology Teams
    • What’s Behind This: Get the Abstraction
    • Summary & Resources
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    8
  • WHY = FIRST IMPRESSIONS MATTER
    Before Confirmation Bias
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    9
  • Does the 1st 60 seconds really matter?
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    10
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • Ever had a telemarketer call?
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    11
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • & you asked to hear more?
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    12
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • Even socially
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    13
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • Confirmation Bias
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    14
  • HOW: APPLICATIONS IN TECHNOLOGY TEAMS
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    15
  • Communication Goes (way, way, way) Beyond Wordse.g. Ray Birdwhistle, University of Pennsylvania
    Verbal vectors:
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    16
    Tone, Pitch
    Tempo: Speed & Cadence
    Timbre
    Volume
  • Translating into (Agile) Practice
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    17
  • 7%
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    18
  • 35+%
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    19
  • 55%
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    20
  • 5x? Or 10x?
    What if teams increase communication effectiveness by even half this?
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    21
  • Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    22
  • THE TIP? LOWER UNCONSCIOUS BARRIERS
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    23
  • The Principle
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    24
  • Build Rapport: Offer similar patterns
    Tonality (35+%!)
    Words (7%): keys to how people represent information – another talk
    Physiological (55%!)
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    25
    ---------------------
    ---------------------
  • Pair off: Verbal Mirroring & Matching
    Keep statements short (get multiple practice exchanges)
    Person A: Start with a Question
    Person B: Short response, using similar verbal behaviors > Question
    Switch roles at signal
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    26
    Tone, Pitch
    Tempo: Speed & Cadence
    Timbre
    Volume
  • Insights: Verbal Mirroring & Matching
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    27
  • WHAT’s BEHIND THIS?
    Get the Abstraction
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    28
  • It began in the Santa Cruz Mountains…
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    29
  • Virginia Satir’s Change Model
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    30
  • Principle: Success Leaves Footprints
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    31
  • NLP Model of Communication
    Unconscious Programming = Barrier: Friend or Foe? Fight or Flight?
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    32
    Mind processes~134 bps
    in groups of
    7 +/- 2 “chunks”
    2B bps info
    Delete
    Distort
    Generalize
  • Keep statements short (get multiple practice exchanges)
    Question || Short Response || Question back
    Keep movements gentle, and when noticed, offer similar behavior
    Pair off: Layer in Physical Mirroring & Matching
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    33
    Tone, Pitch
    Tempo: Speed & Cadence
    Timbre
    Volume
  • Insights: Physical Mirroring & Matching
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    34
  • Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    35
  • Keep statements short (get multiple practice exchanges)
    Question || Short Response || Question back
    Keep movements gentle,
    once physical rapport noticed, shift a little & observe
    Pair off: Pacing & Leading
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    36
  • Insights: Pacing & Leading
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    37
  • BONUS (time permitting): Mis-Matching
    Keep statements short
    Person A: State an insight from this or another source today
    Person B: Respond using VERY DIFFERENT verbal behaviors
    Switch roles at signal
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    38
    Tone, Pitch
    Tempo: Speed & Cadence
    Timbre
    Volume
  • Insights: Verbal Mis-Matching
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    39
  • SUMMARY
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    40
  • Two types of students
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    41
  • Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    42
  • Silicon Valley Code Camp
    43
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • DECIDE: Which TYPE are you?
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    44
  • Communication Goes (way, way, way) Beyond Words
    Tonality (35+%!)
    Words (7%): keys to how people represent information
    Physiological (55%!)
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    45
  • Building Rapport Lowers Unconscious Barriers
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    46
  • 35+%: Observe & Signal Rapport by Verbal Matching
    Tone, Pitch
    Tempo: Speed & Cadence
    Timbre
    Volume
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    47
  • Resources
    Seminal Work:Richard Bandler & John Grinder,Frogs into Princes
    For a far easier Introduction:Michael Brooks, Instant Rapport (available in libraries)
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    48
  • Bernie Maloney, PE, CSMTurning Strategies into Results, from startup to beyond $100M
    about.me/berniemaloney
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    49
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
  • FIN
    UtProsim. Namaste.
    Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    50
  • Silicon Valley Code Camp
    Slide Deck: © 2011 B. Maloney
    51