Creation
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Creation

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Creation Creation Presentation Transcript

  • I think this is hilarious! I NEVER HEARDCREATION EXPLAINED THIS WAY BEFORE !!!
  • In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populatedthe Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow andred vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
  • Then using Gods great gifts,Satan created Ben and JerrysIce Cream and Krispy CremeDonuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" andWoman said, "and as long as youre at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained10 pounds. And Satan smiled.
  • And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep thefigure that Man found so fair. And Satan broughtforth white flour from thewheat, and sugar from thecane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.
  • So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.
  • God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained moreweight and his cholesterol went throughthe roof. God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel FoodCake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devils Food Cake."
  • God then brought forth running shoes so that Hischildren might lose those extrapounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. AndMan and Woman laughed andcried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.
  • Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimmingwith nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.
  • God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonalds and its99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.
  • God sighed and createdquadruple bypass surgery.
  • Then Satan created Cuts to the Health Care System. Amen
  • If you dont send this to five old friends right away there will befive fewer people laughing in the world