We communicate with people everyday.- Verbal- Non Verbal/Body Language- “I” Messages- Listening
PASSIVE COMMUNICATION CHARACTERISTICSPassive- unwilling or unable to express thoughts andfeelings in a direct or firm manner• Blushes when someone looks his/her way• Agrees with EVERYONE.• Buys from every door-to-door salesman• Uses phrases like “A person I know said” or “They say”• Takes the blame for anything that happens• Makes other feel guilty by letting them walk all over him/her• Apologizes often in conversationWhat’s it like to communicate with someone like this?
AGGRESSIVEAggressive- overly forceful, pushy, or hostile.• Tells others what he/she wants and then talks them into it• Blows his/her stack when anyone disagrees• Rams his/her opinions down other people’s throats• Demands an explanation for other people’s behavior, such as “Why do you have to…”• Very Critical of others• Listens by interrupting• Must be in charge• Gets even with sarcasmKnow anyone like this? How easy is it to be around them?
PASSIVE AND AGGRESSIVE COMMUNICATION
ASSERTIVEAssertive- express views clearly and respectfully• Buys only what he/she needs from door-to-door salesmen• States his own opinion matter of factly• Negotiates and makes compromises when needed• Smiles frequently• Takes credit when credit is due• Does not NEED to win an argument• Can admit if he/she is wrong• Cooperates well with others• Listens when others speakOf the three types, assertive communicators are most successful. Howcome?
CONSTRUCTIVE VS. DESTRUCTIVECOMMUNICATION
NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION• Body Language: nonverbal communication through gestures, facial expressions, behaviors, and posture.• Sometimes WHAT we say isn’t important as HOW we say it.• Everything we do sends a message!
NON VERBAL CUES ACTIVITY
WHAT DIFFERENT NONVERBAL CUES MEANCrossed Arms Mirroring Closed off. Implies resistance. Shows interest. You find the Not listening or interested. speaker favorable.A nose rub Forward lean/decrease in Linked with deception. Could backwards lean mean you’re lying or trying to hide Indicates positive sentiment and the truth. interest.A barrier Eye Contact You’re too close. Back off. Shows interest, attention, and involvement.A hand placed under the chin Contemplative. Making a decision. Raised EyebrowFeet pointed toward the door May indicate skepticism or interest, depending on how it is Ready to leave. The feet are the done. most honest part of the body. What direction are they facing? Avoiding Eye Contact dishonesty or discomfortA back of the neck scratch Concerned or have questions.
WHY ARE NON VERBAL SKILLS IMPORTANT?
SPEAKING SKILLS• “I” Message: a statement that focuses on your feelings rather than someone else’s behavior.• Replace “You” messages with “I” messages
“I” MESSAGES3 Ingredients • Event • Consequence of the event • Feeling • How that event made you feel?