It Can Wait


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Module for the First Candoni Summer Youth Camp: It Can Wait, saying yes to life and no to premarital sex

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It Can Wait

  1. 1. IT CAN WAIT MODULE ON PREMARITAL SEX AND ABSTINENCE FOR TEENAGERS Designed by BIEN ELI NILLOS, MD Doctor to the Barrio Municipality of Candoni, Negros Occidental Department of Health
  2. 2. (This module was designed exclusively for the summer youth camp of the young people of the municipality of Candoni, Negros Occidental. Any similarities with other modules or retreats are purely coincidental and unintentional) Copyright © 2009 It Can Wait: Saying Yes to Life and No to Premarital Sex A Youth Camp Guide for Facilitators Introduction Sex is good. It is good because it is a God-given gift. It has its origins from God. The Christian Bible tells us that on the day of Creation, God told His creatures to “go forth and multiply and replenish the earth.” The same mandate was given to Adam and Eve, when God presented Eve, the First Woman, to Adam, the First Man. “This is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh,” uttered Adam, and since then they consummated their union as husband and wife. Sex is a Divine gift and like every gift, it comes with a responsibility. Sex, in the first place, was “invented” by God in order to increase the human species. Unlike lower forms of animals, which have a crude way of multiplying, the human act of sexual intercourse involves not only hormones which swell up into so-called instincts but also emotional and rational actions, grounded on human experiences, values, and most of all, freewill. Freewill, like sex, is another divine gift. And unlike lower creatures, only humans were given freewill. It is no surprise therefore that when God granted the gift of sex, he gave it within the context of marriage, within the union of a man and woman. He must have therefore desired that the act of sex must initiate not only the propagation of the species but also the nurturing of the offspring. It is not enough therefore that humans get pregnant and deliver babies. The responsibility does not end there. Once a baby is delivered into the world, all attention is given towards the baby. The family provides for the baby’s physical and even emotional needs. The end desire is to form a human being that is an effective member of the human society.
  3. 3. Sex therefore demands from both man and woman the commitment to love one another, in order to form a family, which would provide for the offspring, who will later become a new responsible member of the larger human family. While sex is the ultimate expression of love between a man and a woman, it is not the only reason for it. Unfortunately, the contemporary world has somewhat distorted this original idea of sex. Sex has been made almost too casual, too commercialized, that it becomes an act that would only satisfy the “hormonal” and emotional needs of the persons involved. The idea of it being a gift to us as “Co-creators” has been lost, amidst the distortion of sex. Sex has become a commodity. It is therefore common to hear of terms such as “casual sex” or “one-night stands”. We often hear in songs or movies lines such as, “I don’t love you; I just want to make love with you.” The victims of such distortions are becoming younger and younger. It is no surprise therefore that present data would show that a large part of the Filipino youth is into premarital sex. A few of them are into polygamous relationships. Some would even admit that they had sex to satisfy curiosity or because of pressures to prove their “love” for one another. The result of such actions would lead to unwanted pregnancies. A few of these unwanted pregnancies would lead to self-induced abortions. A large part of these self-induced abortions would lead to complications such as bleeding or even infection. For those young females who would keep their babies, complications such as preeclampsia or cephalopelvic disproportions and other complications of pregnancy, would be the common encounters. The entry of contraceptive methods and accessibility to these artificial methods has only answered the wrong problem. The problem is not that these young people are not safe from the risks of unprotected sex. The problem is that these young people have imprinted in their minds a distorted concept of sex. If left uncorrected, whether or not they practice safe sex, these young people will not appreciate the value of responsibility and the principle of delayed gratification and self-discipline. The rational aspect of our humanity is left un-flexed, and will later atrophy and become non-existent. We become no more than the lower forms of animals: instinct-based. Objectives Gathering the young people in a fertility awareness campaign aims to: 1. Increase the knowledge of the young people about their sexuality: the anatomy, physiology and psychology of their human body, particularly the reproductive system and the changes a young boy and a young girl would undergo especially during puberty stage. 2. Increase the knowledge of the young people about the miracle of pregnancy: the fetal development and the changes experienced by a pregnant woman during and after her pregnancy.
  4. 4. 3. Increase their openness to discuss about sex: their impressions, social issues concerning about sex, the realities they see in relation to sex and the consequences of sex. 4. Increase their understanding about the purpose of sex, the dynamics of relationships and how a young gentleman and a young lady must act in order to avoid the complications of non-sexual and sexual risk behaviors. 5. Encourage the young people to adapt a mentality that is pro-life, to say no to abortion, and to wait for the right time and right reason to commit to do the sexual act. Participants Participants involved in this one-day session are those aging 13-22 years old (high school and college students), male or female, with any religious or ethnic background, coming from any economic class of society. What Should Facilitators Do? The facilitator’s job is important. He or she must be fully aware of the objectives of this activity and must also adhere to the same principles of this session. This is to ensure the credibility of the facilitator. Who can facilitate? What are the qualities of a good facilitator? A facilitator must be: 1. Open – throughout the activity, the facilitator must not be judgmental but rather must be open, inviting trust from the participants to be truthful and open. 2. Sincere – throughout the activity, the facilitator must show empathy towards the participants and must be authentic and honest about what they feel or think. 3. Interested – throughout the activity, the facilitator must show interest towards the participants. Each participant has a story to tell or a question he or she might be afraid to ask. A facilitator must show interest, maintaining eye contact always, in order to elicit trust from the participants and allow them to freely share their feelings and thoughts throughout the activity. 4. Leaders – throughout the activity, the facilitators must initiate the workshops and discussions. Facilitators must also know how to take control especially when it comes to time management and discipline among the participants. Good leaders however are also good listeners, therefore, facilitators must be sensitive to the needs of the participants and must also be keen on problems arising from the sessions. Pre-Youth Camp Facilitators’ Session
  5. 5. It is important that those who wish to volunteer as facilitators must undergo a pre-youth camp facilitator’s session. During this pre-youth camp session, facilitators and organizers discuss the objectives of the camp, the activities of the camp and would also simulate the activities of the camp. It is also important that the facilitators themselves must also strip themselves of their judgments and pre-conditions prior to the camp, in order for them to effectively act as facilitators. During the pre-youth camp session, data and facts are presented to the facilitators and brief run-downs of the lectures are also shared with the facilitators. In this way, the facilitators are also being equipped with the knowledge that they can easily share and impart with their fellow youth. Planning is also done during the pre-youth camp session, especially organizing the venue, inviting the participants, and preparing for the materials and tapping people needed during the entire camp. Flow of Activities for the Youth Camp Activities can be re-arranged depending on the choice of the organizers or facilitators. Flexibility is the key in order to ensure the attention and interest of the participants. Time Activity Set-up 7:00 a.m. Start of Registration of Participants Camp site entrance 8:00 a.m. Youth Rally/Caravan Town plaza 9:00 a.m. Formal Opening Ceremonies Camp Site 10:00 a.m. Getting to Know You Camp Site First Plenary Session Activity: “The Human Bingo” 10:30 a.m. Setting up Camp Camp Site Activity: “Founding The Camp” Brief Orientation of Rules of Camp 11:30 a.m. Preparation for Lunch and Lunch Activities Camp site 12:00 noon Lunch Camp site 1:00 p.m. Instructions prior to Afternoon Activities Camp site 1:30 p.m. Division of Camps (Boys and Girls) Classrooms/big tents Lecture 1: “Puberty: Big Changes”
  6. 6. Open Forum 2:30 p.m. Lecture 2: “Pregnancy: Miracle of Life” Classrooms/big tents Open Forum 3:30 p.m. Second Plenary Session Camp Site Activity: “Games of the Genders” 5:00 p.m. Small group discussion Camp Site Lecture 3: “Let’s Talk About Sex” 6:00 p.m. Preparation for Dinner and Dinner activities 7:00 p.m. Dinner 8:00 p.m. Bonfire Ceremony and Pledges Camp site 9:00 p.m. Social Night ----- 7:00 a.m. Send Off Ecumenical Prayer Service Camp Rules These rules are to be announced during the orientation of the participants. Copies of the rules can also be distributed days before the camp. 1. All participants are to register during the registration time. A pre-registration form has been handed out to sponsoring youth organizations days before the Youth Camp. Upon registration, the participant will be given an I.D. card which he or she must wear all throughout the activity. Only participants with I.D. will be allowed to enter the camp. 2. No participants are allowed to leave the camp throughout the duration of the activity. All participants are to eat and sleep within the premises of the camp. A separate camp for boys and girls will be set up. No boys are allowed in the girl’s camp and vice versa. Chaperones are appointed to strictly enforce this rule. 3. Each participant must bring the following: ballpen, handkerchief, beddings (sleeping bag), personal necessities (toothpaste, toothbrush, soap, etc), medications (if necessary), extra clothes, slippers, eating utensils, packed lunch, snacks and canned goods. Each delegation must also bring the following: tent, cooking utensils, food and water. 4. Each delegation must have an Officer-in-charge who shall take responsibility for their delegates. The OIC shall also act as representative of the delegation during meetings. 5. The following things are not to be brought inside the camp: alcohol, magazines, cigarettes, drugs, TV, radio, computer, pets and other things that might distract the participants.
  7. 7. 6. We eat, sleep, play and learn together in the camp. All participants are required to attend all lectures and activities of the camp. 7. A first-aid station will be set up in case some participants may not be feeling well. Participants to the youth camp are to be assumed however that they are physically and mentally fit for this activity. 8. Participants are discouraged from bringing and using cellphones, jewelries, watches and large amounts of money and other valuables. Facilitators and organizers of the camp are not to be held responsible for any losses or damages. 9. All participants must show respect; respect to property and to fellow participants and facilitators. Any damage to property will be paid by those responsible. 10. All participants are encouraged to be open and honest. Confidentiality is assured of every participant who wish to share his thoughts and feelings during the discussions. 11. No smoking or drinking of alcohol inside the camp and all throughout the duration of the activity. 12. Any participant who is found violating any of the rules will be removed from the camp and will not be allowed to enter the camp and participate. 13. Any participant below 18 years old is required to bring a duly-signed parental consent form. 14. Do not forget to have fun. Group Activity: The Human Bingo All participants must join this activity. It is included during the pre-orientation activity of the Youth Camp. Pre-activity Set-up: Participants are to be gathered in an open field where they can freely roam. They are to be told that they must put their bags aside and must only bring with them their pens. An appropriate music can be played during the start of the activity. Instructions: Each participant is to be given a Human Bingo Sheet. In each box is a description of a physical or behavioral characteristic. They must first write their name at the back of the sheet. As soon as the signal is given, each participant must seek out a fellow participant in the group and have them write their name on the box which appropriately describes them. The participants must complete their human bingo within the specified time. Fifteen minutes will be enough for the participants. Emphasize that they must WRITE their names legibly and NOT SIGN it. Special Instruction: The Human Bingo sheet must contain 25 different names. No two boxes should have similar names. In other words, one person cannot sign in two or more boxes on the same sheet. Human Bingo Sheets that violate this special rule will have corresponding penalties. Sample Human Bingo Sheet:
  8. 8. Gwapo (boy) Gwapa (girl) Taas ilong Laba buhok May bigote (girl) (boy) Alam (boy) Palabasa libro Hilig sa music Boyish (girl) Athletic (boy) (girl) Religious Hipuson (boy) Mysteriosa Corny mag Palakadlaw (girl) jokes Palaka-on Nami mag Palalagaw Naga-higugma Pisan kanta (boy) na. Born Leader Sagad mag luto Dako muscles Nami mata Good friend Post activity: Facilitators are to collate the names for each box and report to the big group in the latter part of the camp who has the most votes for each box, e.g. The Most Religious, The Most Gwapo/Gwapa. Group Activity: Setting Up Camp All participants must join this activity. This is the first plenary activity, usually conducted prior to lunch time or after the orientation. Pre-activity Set-up: All participants are to be gathered in an open field. They are to be told to bring with them their luggage (beddings, tents, mats, etc). Announce to the big group that all boys must stay on one side and all girls to stay on the other side of the field. Instructions: As soon as the big group has been divided according to gender, give the participants 5 minutes to get to know the names of each member of the group. After five minutes, tell the group that the activity is called setting up Camp. The camp will be divided into two camps: Boys and Girls. Each camp will be given only 60 minutes to accomplish a list of tasks: Task List: ___ Set up Big Tent (tents) For the Group ___ Design and Put Up a Camp Flag Using the Cloth and Paints provided ___ Name your Camp (Put up the Name of your camp) ___ Prepare Camp Lunch ___ Elect A Camp Leader (Big Brother/Big Sister) ___ Prepare A Camp Song/Yell (To be performed During Lunch)
  9. 9. The group who gets their list done gets a prize for the camp. Facilitators will judge the best Camp Song, best Flag and best Camp. Participants can only use the materials they have brought with them. They could not utilize the materials or equipments or properties which belong to the school/venue in order to augment their camp. They must be resourceful and creative. Special Task: Each camp will be given 6 colored flaglets (red for the boys, blue for the girls). The special task is to “steal” all 6 flaglets from the opposing camp. The group who stole the most flaglets after an hour and all the camps have been set up gets to be The Boss. The Boss can get to order the opposing team whatever penalty they would want the opposing team to do. After all the camps have been set, no boy is allowed to be in the girl’s camp or vice versa. Checklist for Facilitators The checklist must be reviewed during the pre-youth camp orientation of all facilitators and youth volunteers. A committee must also take charge of making sure that all of the following are complete before the day of the actual youth camp. Nevertheless, a facilitator must be resourceful and creative. Preparations for the youth camp need not be expensive, although an ample budget may help. It is suggested that corporate sponsorships can also be solicited from local companies. A committee must also be formed that would track down and receive all of these solicitations and make sure to account and liquidate all the expenses to ensure transparency. Materials Needed By Facilitators: 1. printed materials/lecture guides for participants 2. ballpens 3. TV sets (preferably two) 4. Computer or Laptop with Projector for visual aids 5. Sound system, which includes microphone 6. Appropriate music 7. Facilitator’s guide manual for each activity 8. Firewood, match, and bucket of water for bonfire ceremony 9. First aid kit 10. personal beddings/mattresses 11. personal necessities 12. registration table and chairs
  10. 10. 13. registration forms and I.D. (if available; if unavailable, may use name tags) 14. vigil candles 15. flashlights 16. Streamers and banners to be posted within and outside the camp 17. personal food and water supply 18. pledge bracelets (if available) 19. Manila Papers and blackboard for graffiti wall. 20. Pentel Pens 21. Flaglets (6 reds and 6 blues) 22. Flour cloth, washable paints, paint brushes for camp flags 23. Extra bond papers Should new activities be included other than those listed in the manual, facilitators must be flexible enough to provide the needed materials or props associated with those said activities. Printed Materials will include: 1. Pre-camp and post-camp survey forms 2. Human Bingo Sheet 3. Lecture Guides 4. Camp Rules 5. Prayer Service Forms Lecture One: Puberty – Big Changes Boys and girls will have separate rooms and separate lecturers. Although both lectures will be the same, the boys’ lecture will have emphasis on Physical secondary sexual characteristics, particularly changes in the genitalia. The girls’ lecture will have emphasis on the normal menstrual cycle. Needed Materials: Audiovisual Presentation of Lecture and lecture notes. Time Duration: Lecture proper should strictly be 30 minutes the most. The succeeding 30 minutes must be spent for open forum. Notes on Puberty: Puberty is that period in human development wherein the person undergoes drastic changes, both physically and even emotionally. Puberty is controlled by hormones and it happens at varying age: Girls have their puberty earlier than the boys. During Puberty, both the boy and the girl experience physical changes. Girls would notice enlargement of their breasts and the onset of menstruation (“monthly period”). Boys would notice also enlargement of their testicles and penis. At the same time, boys would notice deepening in their voice and the enlargement of their Adam’s apple.
  11. 11. Both boys and girls would also notice sudden appearance of pubic hair, particularly in the armpits and around the genitalia. Boys would also notice appearance of facial hair. Boys would tend to grow muscles as well, their chest would broaden and arms become more muscled. Girls would tend to become slimmer. Both sexes would experience a sudden growth spurt, although the girls would tend to become tall at an earlier age than the boys. On the not-so-good side, high activity of sweat glands would also tend to produce body odor. Sometimes, over-activity of sebaceous glands, coupled with poor hygiene, can also cause pimples, which can be irritating to the adolescent. Puberty somehow prepares both the boy and the girl to be sexually capable, thus the changes noticed are usually sexually associated. Other than the physical changes, emotional and behavioral changes are also noticed. Boys tend to identify themselves with other boys and girls would tend to associated themselves with their fellow females. Puberty coincides with that stage of personality development defined by psychologists as the struggle between Identity and Role Confusion. Peer pressure also sets in, fuelling the teenager’s desire to be “in” or part of the group. During Puberty, because of the surge of hormones (testosterone for the boys, estrogen and progesterone for the girls), both sexes would experience a heightened sexual arousal. Thus, boys would sometimes experience erection. Because of these physical and emotional changes, adolescents must know how to care them of themselves properly, maintain a healthy lifestyle and adhere to proper hygiene. Group Discussion: Before you start the lecture, you might want to ask: For Girls: 1. Who has already started experiencing menstruation in the group? At what age? What was your reaction during your first menstruation? 2. What where the questions going through your mind when you started having those menstruations? Who were the sources of information/answers to your questions? 3. What did you feel when you started noticing the enlargement of your breasts? Was it comfortable for you? Was it embarrassing? 4. Have you been conscious about your breast size, especially among fellow girls or in the presence of boys? 5. What were the other changes you noticed about yourself since you started having your menstruations? For Boys: 1. At what age did you notice the growth of your pubic hairs? 2. At what age did you notice the increase in size of your genitals? 3. When did you notice the change in your voice?
  12. 12. 4. What were the other physical changes you noticed since you started growing your pubic hairs? 5. Have you ever experienced a “wet dream?” What was your first reaction? It is important that the facilitator must ensure that the atmosphere is conducive for open forum, that participants are comfortable enough to talk about themselves, especially about the things that have happened to them or are happening to them during their puberty. Facilitator/lecturer must remind the group that confidentiality is important and that they need not fear. If participants are shy, they can write their answers privately on a piece of paper which the facilitator will then collect and will read the answers without even mentioning the names of the participants who wrote those answers. Processing: End the lecture with the following notes: 1. These physical and emotional changes are NORMAL. They are neither bad nor good. They are essential for our human development. 2. Some persons would experience abnormalities in their growth. Others will have very early onset of puberty. Others will have a very late onset of puberty. 3. It is important that each adolescent must be ready how to tackle the changes happening to them during puberty. They must therefore be open to their parents about what they see or feel. If they are not comfortable, they can ask questions about these physical changes from their church leaders, counselors or medical professionals. Lecture Two: Pregnancy – Big Miracle Boys and Girls will have separate lectures. Although the lecture will be relatively the same, the boys’ lecture will have emphasis on the participation of the male gender during conception. The girls’ lecture will have emphasis on the role of the female gender during conception and fetal development. Needed materials: Audiovisual presentation and lecture guide Time Duration: Strictly 30 minutes are to be allotted for lecture proper and 30 minutes will be spent for open forum. Notes on Pregnancy: Pregnancy is the consequence of the meeting of two gametes, the sperm from the male and the egg from the female. Through the act of sexual intercourse, the sperms of the male is introduced into the female’s vagina, where they search for the egg released by the ovary of the female, way up the uterus and into the fallopian tube. The fallopian tube is the site of fertilization. If the fertilization is successful, the female stops producing eggs and the uterus, whose linings have thickened days earlier in preparation for a possible fertilization, readies itself for the implantation of the fertilized egg.
  13. 13. Once implanted, the fertilized egg begins it development, from embryo to fetus to full human being. During the first 3 months, the developing embryo begins its formation of the essential and vital organs of the human body. The heart would start beating as early as 8-10 weeks of intra-uterine life. By the end of the 3rd month, all organs must have been completed. The remaining 6 months are spent for the growth of these organs, increasing in size capable to function normally once the baby is delivered by the mother. When the baby is matured enough to live outside of the womb, the mother experiences labor pains and begins the stages of labor which ends in the delivery of the baby and other products of conception (placenta). As soon as the umbilical cord is cut, the baby now breathes on his own, however, he is still dependent on the care of the mother and the father. In order to survive, babies are dependent on their parents for food, clothing and shelter. It is a huge responsibility therefore to take care of a newborn. During pregnancy, the female undergoes physical changes, some of which can be very dangerous for her, such as increase in the volume of blood, which can lead to possible increase in blood pressure. Increased blood pressure is dangerous to a pregnant woman and her baby, and may result to seizures and even death of both the mother and the baby. It is important therefore that a pregnant mother must immediately start prenatal check ups in order to ensure a healthy pregnancy. Group Discussion: Before you start, you may want to ask the following questions: For Both Boys and Girls 1. Do you know of friends who have been pregnant? 2. Have you observed your mother being pregnant with your siblings? What have you observed? It is important that the facilitator must ensure that the atmosphere is conducive for open forum, that participants are comfortable enough to talk about themselves, especially about the things that are happening when one gets pregnant. Facilitator/lecturer must remind the group that confidentiality is important and that they need not fear. If participants are shy, they can write their answers privately on a piece of paper which the facilitator will then collect and will read the answers without even mentioning the names of the participants who wrote those answers. Processing: End the lecture with the following notes 1. Pregnancy is the usual outcome when a male and a female have sexual intercourse, especially if both are fertile. It is the result of fertilization and it usually lasts for 9 months.
  14. 14. 2. At the moment of union of the sperm and egg, the union of two sets of DNA (one set from the male and one set from the female), human life begins and the start of fetal development ensues. 3. During pregnancy, the female undergoes certain physical changes, changes which can be detrimental to the pregnant woman’s life. 4. It is the responsibility of both mother and father to take care of the newborn. Group Activity: Let’s Talk About Sex It is important that this forum be discussed in a small group. Prior to this activity, each facilitator must ensure that confidentiality must be assured to each participant. Pre-activity set up: Big groups must be divided into smaller groups of ten participants the most. Boys will form their own exclusive small groups, the same with the girls. Only male facilitators will handle the boys’ group and only female facilitators will handle the girls’ group. Instruct the participants to bring their blindfold and ballpens with them. Instructions: Tell the big group to find their small groups of ten. As soon as they have their small groups, tell them to follow their designated facilitator. Each participant must have his or her own blindfold and ballpen. Each small group will find an area in the open field or classrooms and form their small circle. Once they have settled, ask the participants to blindfold themselves. Once they have blindfold themselves tell them that they need to be very open and very honest. You will be reading statements about sex and ask the group if they agree to the statement, they only need to raise their hand quietly. No one is allowed to talk or make any noise. Be sure that they are seated not too close to each other.
  15. 15. The following are the list of statements the facilitator must read: For Both Gender Groups: 1. I am below 18 years old 2. I smoke. 3. I drink alcohol whether socially or occasionally. 4. I have read or watch pornography at least once 5. I usually talk about sex with my friends. 6. I have experienced dating. 7. I have experienced fantasizing about sex. 8. I have experienced masterbating. 9. I feel guilty thinking about sex. 10. I am comfortable about my body. 11. I have experienced kissing the opposite sex 12. I have experienced sex. 13. I have experienced sex more than once. 14. I have once used contraception. 15. I think of sex as something bad and wrong. For Boys: 1. I have experienced at least once “wet dreams”. 2. I am comfortable talking about sex and changes in my body with my parents 3. I am comfortable talking about sex and changes in my body with friends. 4. I once entertained being curious with having sex or masterbating with other boys. 5. I find these statements comfortable and I have honestly answered these statements. For Girls: 1. I am comfortable talking about my body with other girls. 2. I have once had or am currently in a sexually active relationship. 3. I talk about my boyfriends with my parents. 4. I once entertained the thought of kissing another girl. 5. I am comfortable being physical with another boy. 6. I find these statements comfortable and I have honestly answered those statements. For every statement, try to count how many have raised their hands. After all the statements have been read, ask the participants to remove their blindfolds. For each statement, tell them how many in the group have raised their hands. Notes: Inform of them of the data about sex and let them give their feedback for each detail or data.
  16. 16. End the small group discussion by asking them if they have questions and answer as truthfully as possible. It will also be helpful if you allow them to share their opinion first before giving your own answer. End also the small group discussion by emphasizing the value of sex within the context of marriage and its importance, especially the value of waiting for the right time. Emphasize to the participants that what they are feeling are NORMAL: it is normal to think and feel about those things, especially while they are at a stage where they are trying to find their identity as a male and female. It is the ACTION that matters. We might not be able to control how we feel (and feelings are neither bad nor good) but we can control our ACTIONS. It is important therefore to talk about your feelings and thoughts, with your parents or your trusted counselor. By talking about your feelings and thoughts, you can be able to reconsider your future actions and probably avoid doing things which you will regret at the end. Bonfire Pledge Ceremony Facilitators are to gather the big group in a circle around a huge pile of wood. Each participant must have his or her own vigil candle and a copy of the Pledge Ceremony Service. After Dinner, gather all the boys in one room and all the girls in one room. Tell them that this is now their initiation night into adulthood. All must then wear their blindfolds and will have to line up. Facilitators are then to lead them to the site of the bonfire. They are not to remove their blindfolds until further instruction. Leader: Welcome participants to your pledging ceremony. A few minutes ago, all of you have been through what we call the Fear Walk. The adolescent stage can be a frightening experience for all of you. It is that stage wherein you are trying to find yourself, trying to be true to yourself and trying to find your way through the darkness of ignorance, of misinformation and even peer pressure. It is important therefore that in order to keep yourself intact, you must seek the light, the light of wisdom and understanding. (At this point, facilitators are to light the bonfire) Please remove your blindfolds.
  17. 17. (All participants are to remove their blindfolds and must remain silent) Throughout the day, we have learned a lot about ourselves, our body and our feelings. We have learned that we are human beings and we have dignity and reason. The fire before you symbolizes the light of knowledge, of guidance and wisdom. It serves as a reminder of what you have learned today and what you promise to do after the learning you have received. The process of learning does not end here. In fact, you are challenged to sustain the curiosity, to ask questions, to seek help and to be open about your feelings and thoughts. The flame also represents your commitment to wait, to wait for the right time, for the right person, for the right reason. (Play appropriate music…) Pledge Ceremony: (One person lights his candle from the flame and goes back to his/her seat, then the person seated beside him/her will light his/her candle, until everyone has their candles lit) One representative from the boys will say their pledge. One representative from the girls will say their pledge. Leader: I now invite everyone to stand up and turn around, facing outside the circle. Making a commitment is a serious action, one which you just can take lightly. Once you make that commitment, you promise to be faithful to that commitment. Therefore, those who are ready to commit, to make that pledge to wait, he or she must turn around and face the fire, take two steps towards the fire and wait. (Facilitators then go to those participants who are facing the bonfire and take their lighted vigil candle and press the flame of the candle on their palm) Instructions for the Facilitators: End the Pledge with an appropriate music or song learned during the camp. An official camp song or theme song either chosen beforehand by the facilitators or by the participants themselves is highly suggested. After the Pledge, facilitators may give instructions with regards to the following day’s activity which is the Send-Off Morning Prayer. Facilitators may also take this opportunity to thank the participants for their active participation. It can also be an opportunity for participants to give their own feedback with regards to their experiences and learning throughout the activity.
  18. 18. Modified Module: It Can Wait Classroom Series This module was originally designed for a youth camp setting but can also be conducted in a classroom or school setting whether in small groups or big groups. The following are suggested modifications in the schedule so it can fit an either one-day activity or two-day activity. SEQUENCE OF ACTIVITIES: Time Activity Venue 8:00 a.m. Registration Registration Table/Classroom 8:30 a.m. Orientation/Introduction Classroom or Quadrangle 9:00 a.m. Human Bingo Activity Quadrangle or Classroom 9:30 a.m. Dividing the Group Quadrangle or Classroom Lecture No. 1: Puberty
  19. 19. 10:30 a.m. Lecture No. 2: Pregnancy Classrooms 11:30 a.m Lunch Break 12:30 p.m. Icebreakers: Boys vs Girls Quadrangle 1:30 p.m. Let’s Talk About Sex: Small Group Discussion 2:30 p.m. Commitment Writing 3:00 p.m. Pledging Ceremony 5:00 p.m. End of Session Post-Activity Debriefing