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Are you designing your professional relationships?
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Are you designing your professional relationships?


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  • 1. Are you designing yourprofessional relationships?Presented by Alla ZollersUX Consultant &, May 29, 2013
  • 2. Rule #1:No One Gets To Be WrongWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 3. Rule #2:What’s said in the room stays in the room(Kind of like Vegas)Wednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 4. ProcessToolsTechniquesWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 5. ProcessToolsTechniquesRelationshipsWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 6. We under invest inrelationship infrastructuresWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 7. What happens whenrelationships break down?Wednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 8. ExplicitlyDesign Your Professional RelationshipsWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 9. The Steps1. Get out of your own wayIdentify and manage your inner critics2. Know your valuesDiscover what is important to you3. Invite co-designExplicitly design your relationship4. IterateContinue to redesign the relationship on acontinuous and ongoing basisWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 10. All us have self-sabotaging inner voices that hold usback. Their job is to preserve the status quo.The Saboteurs have all the reasons ready why this plan(whatever you are trying to do) is stupid, dangerous,hopeless, or generally an ill-advised course of action.Identify Your SaboteursWe all have them.Wednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 11. The #1 SaboteurPresenting ... The JudgeThe judge sabotages us by having us feel anxiety,disappointment, anger, regret, guilt, and shame byfinding faults with 1) ourselves; 2) others, and 3) ourcircumstances.Thoughts:What is wrong with me?What is wrong with you?What is wrong with my circumstance or this outcome?Wednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 12. Perfectionist- If you can’t do it perfectly,don’t do it at all- I hate mistakesScarcity- There is not enough _______- More is better- This is just the way it isPleaser- I can’t disappoint other people- To be a good person I shouldput the needs of others ahead ofmy ownHyper-Achiever- I must be the best at what I do- I must be efficient and effectiveHyper-Vigilant- When is the other shoe going todrop?- If I make a mistake, I fear everyoneis going to jump down my throatController- No one tells me what to do- If I work hard enough I can controlthe situation so it goes my wayA Few Good Accomplices ...Wednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 13. 5 Minute Saboteur, May 29, 2013
  • 14. 5 Ways to Manage Your Saboteurs1. Personify the Saboteur2. Acknowledge the Saboteur3. Give the Saboteur a job todo or a place to go4. Ask the Saboteur to get outof the way5. Physically represent theSaboteur and put them awayWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 15. Know Your ValuesWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 16. Think of a special peak moment when your life wasespecially rewarding or poignant. Look for values thatwere being honored.Discover Your ValuesThink of a times when you were angry, frustrated or upset.Look for values that were being suppressed.Reflect back in your life to someone you have greatlyadmired and describe their qualities. Listen for values.Wednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 17. Now that you know your values ...• Designing your relationships• Job Interviews• Vetting clients• Managing Up• Feeling fulfilled in your work and lifeyou can use that knowledge for...Wednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 18. DemoWednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 19. Script ...Can we go out to lunch together this week? I wouldlike to discuss how to work together ...I recently learned a few things that are important tome ... what is important to you?When we work together, I would like it to feel______ ... how would you like it to feel?How do you want to behave together when things getdifficult?What would really help our relationship flourish?You can count on me for ______ ... what can I counton from you?Wednesday, May 29, 2013
  • 20. Thank You!I am available for ...UX ConsultingTeam CoachingIndividual, May 29, 2013