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Teacher Jokes
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Teacher Jokes



To keep all teachers smiling...

To keep all teachers smiling...



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Teacher Jokes Teacher Jokes Presentation Transcript

  • Now we know why teachers go "crazy" with their students .................
    • Teacher: Why are you late?
    • Webster: Because of the sign.
    • Teacher: What sign?
    • Webster: The one that says "School Ahead, Go Slow!"
    • Teacher: Cindy, why are you doing your maths on the floor ?
    • Cindy:    You told me to do it without using tables.
    • Teacher: John, how do you spell "crocodile"?
    • John:      K-R-O-K-0-D-A-I-L
    • Teacher: No, that's wrong.
    • John:     Maybe it's wrong but you asked me how I spell it.
    • Teacher:   What is the chemical formula for water ?
    • Sarah:        " HIJKLMNO"
    • Teacher:    What are you talking about ?
    • Sarah:      Yesterday you said it is "H to O".
    • Teacher:  George, go to the map and find North America
    • George:    Here it is !
    • Teacher:   Correct. Now, class, who discovered North America ?
    • Class:        George !!
    View slide
    • Teacher: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we did not have 10 yrs ago.
    • Willy:    Me !!
    • Teacher:  Tommy, why do you always get so dirty ?
    • Tommy:  Well, I am a lot closer to the ground than you are.
    View slide
    • Silvia: Dad, can you write in the dark ?
    • Father:  I think so. What do you want me to write ?
    • Silvia:    Your name on this report card.
    • Teacher: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects ?
    • Jose:    Don't bite any.
    • Teacher: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I".
    • Ellen:        I is ........................
    • Teacher:   No, Ellen, always say "I am"
    • Ellen:        All right ............. "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
    • Teacher:  Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE" ?
    • Johnny:    Sir, my mother and father got married on the same day and at the same time.
    • Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father did not punish him ?
    • Billy:        Because George still had the axe in his hand.
    • Son:        Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt ?
    • Father:      No, why do you ask that question?
    • Son:        Well, where did you get THIS mummy then ?
    • Teacher: What a pair of strange socks you are wearing - one green and one blue.
    • Kirk:       Yes, it's really strange. I've got another pair of the same colour at home.
    • Old Lady: Little girl, where did you get such good looks ?
    • 5 yr old: I must have got it from Daddy 'cause Mummy still got hers.
    • Teacher: Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
    • Student:   Brotherly love.
    • Teacher:  Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
    • Sam:     No, Sir, I don't have to as my Mum is a good cook.
    • Teacher: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
    • Desmond: No, Teacher, it is the same dog !
    • Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps talking when people are no longer interested?
    • Adam:     A Teacher !!