Facebook for Parents

Facebook for Parents
Parenting Across Social Media
Monday, November 9th
Winchester Public Library

Introduction
Hi!
I’m Amelia Peloquin
and I work as a technology consultant for libraries, nonprofits and small businesses.
My areas of focus include budget-friendly web design, training and support, social media marketing and project management.
Find me at:
TechWithoutWalls.com

Please Note:
For your reference, this slide presentation, associated handouts & links are available here:
http://facebook.techwithoutwalls.com

Kids are Connected
Social media is omnipresent, and the majority of teens have an account on Facebook, MySpace, or Twitter.
Teens are also spending lots of time texting and using the Internet with cell phones and other mobile devices (iPod touch, psp, etc.)

Patterns of Use
Source: Cox Communications May 2009 Teen Online & Wireless Safety Surveyhttp://www.cox.com/takecharge/safe_teens_2009/media/2009_teen_survey_internet_and_wireless_safety.pdf

Concerns for Parents

Age-Appropriate Internet Use
Mainstream social sites like Facebook require users to be 13+ but it’s easy to lie about age.
Many parenting experts think teens are too young to use these sites safely—parental guidance is recommended!
Seek kid-friendly sites (Club Penguin, Webkins) for younger children.

Objectionable Content + Peers
Hate groups
Pro-anorexia groups

Cyberbullying:
abusive behavior among peers that is perpetrated through electronic means
(cell phones, social network sites, Instant Messenger, etc.)

Sexting & Other inappropriate photos/videos (i.e. drug/alcohol use)

Predators & Other Creeps
Can be overblown in the media, but stranger danger is real.
(That being said, kids are more likely to be bullied/harassed online by someone they know in person.)

Phishing, ID Theft, Viruses/Spyware
Many kids don’t know the basics about protecting your computer, email & other accounts.
It can be easy to get tricked into giving up personal info.
Most ads for “free” music downloads, ringtones, personality tests, etc are scams.

Deceptive Ads

Cyberbullying

What is Cyberbullying?
Name-calling, threatening language & other verbal harassment
Spreading embarrassing photos or video
Sharing secrets without permission
spreading rumors online
Can involve trickery, exclusion, impersonation

Cyberbullying is commonplace.

Examples of Cyberbullying
Making or joining a Facebook group about someone
Creating a fake account online to impersonate/ridicule a peer
Creating or forwarding a YouTube video about someone
Sending threatening messages over IM, text messages, email or on social sites like Facebook/MySpace/Twitter

Victims & Perpetrators Often Overlap

Stop it before it starts
Talk to your child about ethical and responsible online behavior
Set expectations for appropriate use of Internet & mobile devices
Help your child recognize harassment and know what to do if victimized by peers online

Know how to address the issue
Know how to block cyberbullies on Facebook/MySpace/Twitter (see “Locking it Down” handout)
Know how to report abusive content on social networking sites and photo/video sharing sites
Consider talking to teachers and school administrators.

Parenting Connected Kids

General Advice for All Ages
Understand what kids are doing online
Know the risks and decide what’s appropriate
Communicate your expectations with your child
Be present!

Parents of Young Children
Talk about basic online safety
Don’t talk to strangers online
Don’t share passwords with anyone except parents
Don’t share personal info like address, phone number, or name of school

Create a “fenced-in” online space
Use web browsers designed specifically for kids
Limit social networking to age-appropriate sites like Club Penguin or Webkinz

Actively supervise your child’s Internet use
If you can’t sit and supervise, consider parental control options:
OS-based parental controls
Filtering home network traffic with Open DNS
Filtering/monitoring software options

Parents of Middle Schoolers
Review Internet Safety basics
Set specific guidelines and rules
Don’t fill out forms from ads; “free” offers are usually scams
Peer-to-peer software like Limewire generally leads to spyware and viruses

Parents of Middle Schoolers
On social sites like Facebook and MySpace
No Strangers & don’t share personal info
Set strict privacy settings! The default privacy settings on these sites are not private at all.
Be a part of their online social network
Know how to block harassing users & report abusive/inappropriate material

Discuss public vs. private and consequences of inappropriate use
Despite privacy controls, nothing posted online is ever really private
Emails/IMs can be cut and pasted
Embarrassing/Inappropriate photos and video can be easily forwarded to other people

Talk about Cyberbullying
Know how to recognize and respond to incidents of cyberbullying
Block users & report abuse
Don’t retaliate
Promote responsible technology use
Talk about ethical and responsible online behavior
Set ground rules and expectations

Parents of Older Teens

Ask to see their sites— they’re still under your roof.
Reality check: If they’re posting photos & info they don’t want parents to see, they probably shouldn’t be posting it online in the first place.

Discuss Online Reputation
Potential long-term consequences of inappropriate material on the internet: college admissions, future employment opportunities, etc…

College and Beyond
Although Facebook has gained popularity with older users over the last two years, many young people see the social web as “theirs.”
Across our culture, we’re experiencing a lot of awkwardness and boundary issues.

Parental Control Options

Parental controls within Windows and Mac OS
Home Network controls with Open DNS
Special browsers for young children
Filtering/Monitoring Software (?)

Parental controls within Windows and Mac OS
Current versions of operating systems allow you to set up accounts with limited access to administrative functions.
This is a good way to protect your computer as well as your kid from viruses and other malware
See tutorial links at http://facebook.techwithoutwalls.com

Filtering content at the home network level with Open DNS
Better than pc-based filtering software, but can be difficult to set up for parents who aren’t tech-savvy.
An incomplete solution: kids go online away from home and on mobile devices, too.
Intellectual freedom & censorship issues: as a librarian, I personally don’t like filters.

PC-Based Filtering & Monitoring Software
Good to consider if there’s been inappropriate behavior & repeated violations of trust
Can be Problematic
Kids use the Internet away from home + on mobiles
Can block access to legitimate sites
Tech-savvy teens can circumvent it
Using spy software can be detrimental to your relationship with your teen

In Conclusion
Educate yourself as best as you can.
Decide what you consider age-appropriate + set limits/boundaries accordingly.
Be present and involved.
Find what works for your family.

Questions/Comments? Feedback?
I’d love to know what you think of this workshop!
Please fill out the (brief!) feedback survey at
http://facebook.techwithoutwalls.com
or email me at:
amelia@techwithoutwalls.com

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Facebook for Parents

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