Two Sides To Every Family My family is very dysfunctional. My family is very loving.
My not so normal, but normal family Dad: He’s a pretty straight forward guy, is family oriented and loves when everyone is home. He gets along with everyone but usually plays favorite with my older brother, because they have a lot in common. Mom: Very funny, spontanious, and usually plays favorite with my sister because she is the youngest, only girl, and they have a lot in common. Ryan: Older brother. Funny, likes sports, having fun and has daily conflict with my mom. Josh: Second oldest. Very smart, school oriented, quite, and both my parents agree he is the “parent favorite”. Me: I’m all over the place. Amelia: Very independent, but likes to laugh. Daily conflict with my Dad. OVERALL: We are all very different from each other.
Constant Conflict Family members fight with each other in different ways. Over time, most families develop their rules for conflictual situations. My family tends to bicker and have small fights quite frequently. It can get very annoying and old because its daily. Like the image, someone is fighting, and if it has nothing to do with you, don’t get involved.
Unresolved Conflict. Unresolved conflict is associate with low relationship satisfaction. In my family, we deal with unresolved conflict by avoiding the issue and direct the communication to areas that bring cohesion. The conflict is usually between a parent and a child. My dad tends to fight with my sister, and my mom with my older brother. My guess is because they don’t seem to understand each other. My Dad doesn’t understand why my sister has to see her boyfriend constantly, while my mom doesn’t understand why my brother has to spend 3 hours playing basketball. As a result, its a constant arm wrestle.
How Do we Deal with it? My family loves to laugh and we laugh quite a bit. Even though the conflict is annoying, we can always turn it around and have a good time.
Decision Making Decision making help to regulate the closeness or distance of family members. The more complex the family system, the more important the decision patterns. Decision making, like power, is a process that belongs to the family system, not an individual.
A Big Decision. I recently “came out” to my parents and it was one of the biggest changes in my family. My parents and siblings had nothing wrong with it, but they didn’t know how to tell everyone else. I didn’t see the problem, but since we’re a very honest family, we tried to figure out a way to handle it. I was slightly annoyed, but understood where my parents were coming from.
There’s many principles that help guide families through decision making. My family created a sense of autonomy by respecting my right to free choice in order to carry out actions that enhance my life. It also helped create a sense of loyalty by carrying out decisions mutually agreed apon. My family has a good way of making decisions because we do it as a family. If it is a serous decision, its going to effect all of us.
Good Self Disclosure Self Disclosure is an important complex, and diffucult type of communication. It is described as occuring when one person voluntarily tells another about themselves. I think to have a close family, you must talk to each other. My family is very close and we always can open up to each other.
Bad Self Disclosure. Self Disclosure in my family hasn’t always been easy and has caused many problems. My sister usually tells my mother everything, while my oldest brother tells my dad everything. I usually will tell my parents together, or it depends on the topic. It’s bad to hide things from parents because it usually never ends well and someone feels left out. There has yet to be a resolution to this.
Interdependance Family memebers who confront there differences can improve there relationship. I feel that if my brother and sister confronted my parents on how they feel, it could change how they self disclose.
Family Development. As a family, we grow with each other. The conflicts and changes that happen everyday, only bring you closer. Family always helps you move forward and there always there to support you.
For The Love Of Family My family is so unique and I wouldn’t want it any other way. We love spending time together and love to laugh. I feel very lucky be loved and supported by my family.