2www.exploreHR.orgContentsContents1. Basic Communication Principles2. Communication Trilogy : Giving Good Information,Gathering Good Information, and Building MutualTrust3. Developing Assertive Communication Skills4. Seven Positive Principles for CooperativeCommunication5. Developing Active Listening SkillsIf you find this presentation useful, please consider telling othersabout our site (www.exploreHR.org)
5www.exploreHR.orgOur values,beliefs, andthoughtsThe Success SequenceThe Success SequenceWhat we sayand doResultsSelf-fulfillingprophecy
6www.exploreHR.orgWe communicate to……We communicate to……• Get information• Motivate• Cheat• Praise• Make arrangements• Give advice• Sell• Greet• Abuse• Etc
7www.exploreHR.orgVerbal, vocal and visualVerbal, vocal and visualVerbal :Verbal :The message thatwe deliverVocal :Vocal :The voice that weconveyVisual :Visual :Our body languageCommunicationCommunication
8www.exploreHR.orgStudies tell 70 % of mistakes in theStudies tell 70 % of mistakes in theworkplace are a direct result of poorworkplace are a direct result of poorcommunication…..communication…..
9www.exploreHR.orgCauses of Communication Difficulties:Causes of Communication Difficulties:• Lack of information and knowledge• Not explaining priorities or goals properly• Not listening• Not understanding fully and fail to ask questions• Mind made up, preconceived ideas
10www.exploreHR.orgCauses of Communication Difficulties:Causes of Communication Difficulties:• Not understanding others’ needs• Not thinking clearly, jumping to conclusions• Bad mood• Failure to explore alternatives
11www.exploreHR.orgCommunication failures can cause…..Communication failures can cause…..• Loss of business• Mistakes, inefficiencies• Lowered productivity• Poor coordination and cooperation• Damaged personal or company image• Frustration, hostility
12www.exploreHR.orgCommunication failures can cause…..Communication failures can cause…..• Dissatisfaction with others• Lowered morale• Loss of team spirit• High employee turnover• Conflict and arguments• Drop in self esteem and confidence• Loss of friendship
13www.exploreHR.org• Premature evaluation• Prejudice• Inattention• Stereotyping• Assumption• Generalizing• Poor listening skills• Fixed ideas• Preconceptions• Ignoring or distorting information contrary to our beliefsSome Common Communication FiltersSome Common Communication Filters
14www.exploreHR.orgEverything we do is communicationEverything we do is communicationThe way we begin our message often determinesThe way we begin our message often determinesthe outcome of the communicationthe outcome of the communicationThe way message is delivered always effects theThe way message is delivered always effects theway message is receivedway message is receivedBasic Communication PrinciplesBasic Communication Principles
15www.exploreHR.orgThe real communication is the message received,The real communication is the message received,not the message intendednot the message intendedCommunication is two way street – we have toCommunication is two way street – we have togive as well as gathergive as well as gatherBasic Communication PrinciplesBasic Communication Principles
17www.exploreHR.orgSix C of giving good informationSix C of giving good informationGive Good InformationGive Good InformationClearClear ConciseConciseCourteousCourteousCompleteCompleteCorrectCorrectConcreteConcrete
18www.exploreHR.orgGive Good InformationGive Good Information• Use precise, memorable and powerful wordsUse precise, memorable and powerful words• Support your words with visual aidsSupport your words with visual aids• Give demonstrationGive demonstration• Provide examples/metaphors/analogiesProvide examples/metaphors/analogies• Use the other person “language”Use the other person “language”When giving information………When giving information………
19www.exploreHR.org7 Positive Principles for7 Positive Principles forCooperative CommunicationCooperative Communication1. Soften the ‘you’s or change the into “I” to avoid soundingavoid soundingpushypushy• Instead of : ‘You’ll have to….’, say ‘Could you….’ Or‘Would you be able to….’2.2. Focus on the solutionFocus on the solution, not the problem• Instead of ‘We’re out of mild….’, say ‘I will pop downthe shop for some milk’.
20www.exploreHR.org7 Positive Principles for7 Positive Principles forCooperative CommunicationCooperative Communication3. Turn can’ts into canscan’ts into cans• Instead of ‘We can’t do that until next week’, say ‘We’llbe able to do that next week’.4.4. Take responsibilityTake responsibility – don’t lay blame• Instead if ‘It’s not my fault’, say ‘Here’s what I can do tofox that’.
21www.exploreHR.org7 Positive Principles for7 Positive Principles forCooperative CommunicationCooperative Communication5.5. Say what do you wantSay what do you want, not what you don’t want• Instead of ‘Don’t; drive too fast’, say ‘Drive carefully’5.5. Focus on the futureFocus on the future, not the past• Instead of “I’ve told you before not to……, say ‘Fromnow on…….”5.5. Share informationShare information rather than argue or accuse• Instead of ‘No, you’re wrong’, say ‘I see it like this….’
22www.exploreHR.orgAssertive CommunicationAssertive Communication• Make statements that are honest, clear,brief, and to the point• Use “I” statement : I’d like, I appreciate,I think• Distinguish between fact and opinion• Ask, don’t tell• Offer improvement suggestions, notadvice and commandsVerbally,Verbally,assertiveassertivepeople :people :
23www.exploreHR.orgAssertive CommunicationAssertive CommunicationVerbally,Verbally,assertiveassertivepeople :people :• Offer constructive criticism, free of blame,assumptions, and ‘shoulds’• Ask questions to find out the thoughtsand feelings of others• Respect the rights of others as well astheir own rights• Communicate mutual respect where theneeds of two people conflict, and look formutually acceptable solutions
24www.exploreHR.orgAssertive CommunicationAssertive CommunicationNonNonVerbally,Verbally,assertiveassertivepeople :people :• Make appropriate eye contact• Sit or stand firmly and comfortably erect• Gesture openly to support theircomments• Speak in a clear, steady, firm tone ofvoice
25www.exploreHR.orgAssertive CommunicationAssertive CommunicationNonNonVerbally,Verbally,assertiveassertivepeople :people :• Maintain open, steady, relaxed facialexpressions, smiling when pleased,frowning when angry• Speak a steady, even pace,emphasizing key words, with fewawkward hesitations
26www.exploreHR.orgManage your body languageManage your body language• Sit or stand at right angles and on the same level, andrespect people’s personal space zones• Use open gestures and body language• Center your attention exclusively on the other person• Lean slightly forward to show interest; a bit further forwardto apply pressure, slightly back to reduce pressure
27www.exploreHR.orgManage your body languageManage your body language• Maintain appropriate eye contact while listening toencourage the speaker; increase eye contact to applypressure; reduce it to lower pressure• Respond appropriately by basing your responses on whatthe other person has just said• Be relaxed and balanced to make relaxed and opencommunication easier
28www.exploreHR.orgGather Good Information withGather Good Information withyour EARsyour EARsEE – explore by asking questionsAA – affirm to show you’re listeningRR – reflect your understandingSS – silence, listen some more
29www.exploreHR.orgExploring QuestionsExploring QuestionsOpenQuestionsOpen questions yield lots of informationbecause they allow a person to explain what ismost important or interesting and encourageelaboration.ProbingQuestionsProbing questions are those that relate to thetopic we want to explore further. Theyencourage the speaker to flesh out the details.
30www.exploreHR.orgClosed vs. Open QuestionsClosed vs. Open QuestionsWhen did that happen? What led up to that?Was your trip successful? What did you manage toaccomplish on your trip?Did you like the candidate? In what ways do you think thatcandidate meets our need?Did you have a good meeting? What happened at the meeting?
31www.exploreHR.orgSome Probing QuestionsSome Probing Questions• Can you be more specifics?• Can you give me an example of that?• What happened then?• For instance?• How does this affect you?• What might cause that, do you think?• Can you fill me in on the details?
32www.exploreHR.orgActive ListeningActive ListeningGiving undivided attention to a speaker in agenuine effort to understand the speakerspoint of view.This involves giving them your full attentionand the use of verbal encouragers such as“Yes”, “Aha” and “Mmm”.It also includes non-verbal acknowledgementssuch as nodding, smiling and body language.ActiveListening
33www.exploreHR.orgBenefits of Active ListeningBenefits of Active Listening1. It forces people to listen attentively to others2. It avoids misunderstandings, as people have toconfirm that they do really understand what anotherperson has said3. It tends to open people up, to get them to say more
34www.exploreHR.org5 Active Listening Skills5 Active Listening Skills• Paraphrasing meanings:Paraphrasing meanings: Translate into your own wordswhat the speaker has said• Reflecting feelings:Reflecting feelings: when someone is expressing emotionor feelings or looks emotional (upset, angry, excited),convey your empathy and encourage the speaker tocontinue• Reflecting factsReflecting facts: briefly summarize the content, or factualaspects, of what the speaker has said.
35www.exploreHR.org5 Active Listening Skills5 Active Listening Skills• Synthesizing:Synthesizing: blend several ideas of the speaker into onetheme or idea.• Imagining out loud:Imagining out loud: imagine what it must be like to be inthe speaker’s place
36www.exploreHR.orgTo listen more effectively…..To listen more effectively…..Attend physicallyAttend physically – the right body language helps us tofocus on the speaker and encourages the speaker to giveus more information.Attend mentallyAttend mentally – follow the speaker’s flow of thought,listen to understand, not evaluate; listen first, then assessCheck it verballyCheck it verbally – paraphrase, clarify, probe further,summarize your understanding
37www.exploreHR.orgBad Habits of Poor ListenersBad Habits of Poor Listeners• Interrupting• Jumping to conclusions• Finishing others’ sentences for them• Frequently (and often abruptly) changing the subject• Inattentive body language• Not responding to what others have said• Failing to ask questions and give feedback
38www.exploreHR.orgGood Habits of Effective ListenersGood Habits of Effective Listeners• Looking at the speaker in order to observe body language andpick up subtle nuances of speech• Asking questions• Giving speakers time to articulate their thoughts• Letting people finish what they are saying before giving theiropinion• Remaining poised, calm, and emotionally controlled• Looking alert and interested• Responding with nods and ‘uh-uhms’.
39www.exploreHR.orgWhen receiving/listening feedbackWhen receiving/listening feedback• Listen, don’t resistListen, don’t resist• Keep calmKeep calm and keep breathing• Let your body language show you areyou arereceptivereceptive• Ask questionsAsk questions to make sure you’veunderstood• Don’t be overlyDon’t be overly sensitivesensitive, selfprotective or cavalierReceivingfeedback
40www.exploreHR.orgWhen receiving/listening feedbackWhen receiving/listening feedbackReceivingfeedback• Does the person offering feedbackknow what they’re talking aboutknow what they’re talking about?• What other information do you haveother information do you havethat supports the feedback?• If you’re tempted to ignore it, do youhave evidence that contradicts theevidence that contradicts thefeedbackfeedback?
41www.exploreHR.orgWhen receiving/listening criticismWhen receiving/listening criticism• Make sure your self image stays positiveself image stays positive.• Mentally examine your critic’s intentions so you will know howhowbest to deal with the informationbest to deal with the information.• Filter the criticismFilter the criticism. Strain out emotion and find the facts. Thenyou can respond to the useful information.• Ask questionsAsk questions until you understand what the speaker is trying totell you.• Don’t make excuseDon’t make excuse. Listen to understand.• Focus on the futureFocus on the future : what can you do to improve?
42www.exploreHR.orgRecommended Further Readings:1. Kris Cole, Crystal Clear Communication : Skills for Understanding andBeing Understood, Synergy Books International2. David A. Whetten and Kim S. Cameron, Developing Management Skills,Harpers Collins Publisher.