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03 22 09 Understanding How Differences Impact Communication Part I Keys To Effective Communication Communication Keys For Couples
 

03 22 09 Understanding How Differences Impact Communication Part I Keys To Effective Communication Communication Keys For Couples

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03 22 09 Understanding How Differences Impact Communication

03 22 09 Understanding How Differences Impact Communication

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    03 22 09 Understanding How Differences Impact Communication Part I Keys To Effective Communication Communication Keys For Couples 03 22 09 Understanding How Differences Impact Communication Part I Keys To Effective Communication Communication Keys For Couples Presentation Transcript

    • West Ridge Church Marriage Ministry
      • “ Can You Hear Me Now?”
      • Communication Keys for Couples
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • ========== D A T I N G ===========
      • Opposites  Attract
      • ========= M A R R I A G E ==========
      • Opposites  Irritate!
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1 Pet 3:7
      • Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you
      • live with your wives, and treat them with respect as
      • the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the
      • gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your
      • prayers. (NIV)
      • You husbands in the same way, live with your
      • wives in an understanding way …(NASB)
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • After laying a foundation of character
      • in our lives, the next essential key of
      • effective communication is to develop
      • mutual understanding.
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • Gen 1:27
      • So God created man in his own image, in the
      • image of God he created him; male and female
      • he created them.
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • Anatomical Differences
      • Brain Chemistry
      • Differences in Senses
    •  
    •  
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • Anatomical Differences
      • Brain Chemistry
      • Differences in Senses
      • Brain Processes
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • 2. Natural Abilities
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 2. Natural Abilities
      • Exodus 31:3-6
      • I have filled him [Bezalel] with ……skill, ability and
      • knowledge in all kinds of crafts – to make artistic designs
      • for work in gold, silver and bronze, to cut and set stones, to
      • work in wood, and to engage in all kinds of
      • craftsmanship…...I have appointed Oholiab… to help him.
      • Also I have given skill to all the craftsmen to make
      • everything I have commanded you .
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 2. Natural Abilities
      • Arts, Music, Drama paint, draw, sing, act, play
      • Sports baseball, football, hunting, etc
      • Verbal skills word puzzles, reading, stories
      • Mechanical ability build things, mechanical
      • Concepts/Ideas teacher, thinker, writer
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • 2. Natural Abilities
      • 3. Family Background
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • 1John 4:5
      • They are from the world and therefore speak
      • from the viewpoint of the world….
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Whatever “world” (family) we are from has a
      • HUGE impact on how we interpret life and
      • react to it.
      • In fact, it defines our concept of “normal .”
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Food Healthy vs. “Southern”
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Religion Spiritual vs. Not so much…
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Finances Spenders vs. Savers
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Pets Many vs. None
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Politics Republic vs. Democrat
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Expressive Huggers vs. Reserved
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Child-Rear Spankers vs. Non-spankers
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Holidays Santa Claus vs. None
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • Chores “His” vs. “Hers”
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 3. Family Background
      • How we were raised becomes our “ normal .”
      • When we discover our spouse does things
      • differently……Well, they’re just wrong !
      • We all need to learn that in most situations,
      • “ they’re not wrong, just different .”
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • 2. Natural Abilities
      • 3. Family Background
      • 4. Primary Role and Emotional Need
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 4. Primary Role and Emotional Need
      • Gen 2:18
      • The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be
      • alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
      • Eph 5:22-23
      • Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For
      • the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the
      • head of the church…
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 4. Primary Role and Emotional Need
      • Eph 5:22 - 28
      • Husbands love your wives, just as Christ loved the
      • church and gave himself up for her…. In this same
      • way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own
      • bodies.
      • Eph 5:33
      • However, each one of you also must love his wife as he
      • loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband .
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 4. Primary Role and Emotional Need
      • Primary
      • Spouse Primary Role Need
      • Husband Loving Servant-Leader Respect
      • Wife Respectful Helper-Comp Love
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • 2. Natural Abilities
      • 3. Family Background
      • 4. Primary Role and Emotional Need
      • 5. Love Languages
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 5. Love Languages
      • (1) Words of Affirmation
      • (2) Quality Time
      • (3) Receiving Gifts
      • (4) Acts of Service
      • (5) Physical Touch
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 5. Love Languages
      • While all “languages” should be expressed, we
      • generally have one or two that we hear best.
      • Our tendency is to express love the way that
      • we hear love.
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 5. Love Languages
      • To be fully received, our expressions of love
      • need to be communicated in a way that our
      • spouse can understand.
      • We need to discover our spouse’s language
      • and learn to speak that to them regularly.
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • 2. Natural Abilities
      • 3. Family Background
      • 4. Primary Role and Emotional Need
      • 5. Love Languages
      • 6. Spiritual Gifts
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 6. Spiritual Gifts
      • 1 Corinthians 12:7, 11, 18-20
      • Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for
      • the common good.
      • All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he
      • gives them [gifts] to each one, just as he determines .
      • ...in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one
      • of them, just as he wanted them to be . If they were all one
      • part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many
      • parts , but one body.
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 6. Spiritual Gifts
      • Spiritual gifts are given TO each believer BY
      • the Spirit FOR the common good .
      • The Holy Spirit determines which gift(s) we
      • receive.
      • God gives us different gifts because the
      • Church and the world need them all !
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 6. Spiritual Gifts
      • Service Gifts Sign Gifts
      • Prophesying Wisdom
      • Serving Prophecy
      • Teaching Knowledge
      • Encouraging/Exhorting Discernment
      • Giving Faith
      • Leading Speaking in Tongues
      • Showing Mercy Interpreting Tongues
      • Miracles
      • Healing
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 6. Spiritual Gifts
      • The spiritual gifts we possess influence
      • how we perceive and respond to our
      • world – and our spouse!
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 1. Physiological
      • 2. Natural Abilities
      • 3. Family Background
      • 4. Primary Role and Emotional Need
      • 5. Love Languages
      • 6. Spiritual Gifts
      • 7. Personality Type
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • By understanding our own personality type – and
      • that of our spouse – we gain a huge advantage to
      • improving our communication. We will have a
      • better insight as to what motivates our spouse,
      • how they are likely to interpret a particular issue ,
      • and how they might respond to a specific situation.
      • Gaining an understanding of these differences
      • enables us to decrease the conflict in our life!
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • We are born with our basic personality and will exhibit many of these strengths and weaknesses over our entire lifetime. BUT we must not fall prey to the belief that our natural-born tendencies can keep us from maturing over time .
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • LaHaye DISC Smalley/Trent
      • Choleric D Lion
      • Sanguine I Otter
      • Phlegmatic S Golden Retriever
      • Melancholy C Beaver
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • Mature Immature
      • Description Strengths Weaknesses
      • Lion Determined Demanding
      • “ High D” Decisive Dictatorial
      • Choleric Direct Blunt Assertive Argumentative
      • Aggressive Overbearing
      • Goal-Oriented Impatient
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • Mature Immature
      • Description Strengths Weaknesses
      • Otter Charismatic Impulsive
      • “ High I” Confident Overconfident
      • Sanguine Gregarious Superficial
      • Stimulating Self-Centered
      • Talkative Poor Listener Enthusiastic Emotional
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • Mature Immature
      • Description Strengths Weaknesses
      • Golden Easy-Going Non-Confront
      • Retriever Accommodating Indecisive
      • “ High S” Patient Indifferent
      • Phlegmatic Calm Apathetic Loyal Passive
      • Dependable Plodding
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • Mature Immature
      • Description Strengths Weaknesses
      • Beaver Orderly Obsessive
      • “ High C” Thorough Nit-Picky
      • Melancholy Systematic Legalistic Quality Perfectionist Cautious Indecisive
      • Analytical Critical
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • God gives us our core personality to help us
      • accomplish His purposes for our life .
      • By God’s Spirit, we can grow beyond our
      • natural weaknesses and do things that are not
      • natural for us .
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • Philippians 2:13
      • … for it is God who works in you to will and to act according
      • to his good purpose.
      • Philippians 4:13
      • I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
      • 2 Timothy 1:7
      • For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of
      • power, of love and of self-discipline.
    • II. Understanding Impact of Differences
      • 7. Personality Type
      • “ You can use your background as an excuse
      • for present behavior only until you receive
      • Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and
      • Savior. After that you have a new power
      • within you that is able to change your
      • conduct.” Dr. Henry Brandt
      • Five Major Keys of Effective Communication
      • 1. Maturing Character
      • 2. Mutual Understanding
      • Do you know who I am?