2011BoydGarn Smackdown 2.0


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2011BoydGarn Smackdown 2.0

  1. 1. Myk Garn and Ritchie Boyd Managing partners Swindle, Shake, Divert & Obfuscate, LLC.   Revenue Enhancement on your Campus for the New Millennium
  2. 2. The Problem <ul><ul><li>State revenue support is at an all time low </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Costs are escalating </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Entrepreneurism is to be rewarded </li></ul></ul>The Solution <ul><ul><li>A highly successful model already exists </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Everybody Hum: “ Fly the friendly skies…” </li></ul></ul>            Costs vs Revenue           
  3. 3. “ You Learn – We Earn” <ul><ul><li>Thorough review of your institutional processes and cost centers </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Top recommendations that will allow your institution to Maximize revenue while providing the enduring patina of high quality customer services </li></ul></ul>
  4. 4. You are already making progress… <ul><ul><li>Super Size my tuition ! </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>“ Up to 20 credits for the cost of 12!” </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>A different rate for every student ! </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>In-state, out of state, residential, left-handed… </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>A complex and dizzying array of fees and surcharges ! </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Lab fees, Technology fees, Processing fees, etc… </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>But – there is SO MUCH MORE you could do! </li></ul></ul>
  5. 5. Premium Technology services <ul><ul><li>Device Insurance – standard / premium </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>$9.95/$19.95 per term, plus one free 256K USB drive! </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Tiered Wi-Fi access </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Tall (dial-up speed) – Free - Limited  availability </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Grande (DSL speed) - $19.95/mo  Not guaranteed during peak use periods </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Vente (1gbps) - $1.99/day, or $120/term </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Instant Level 80 Shaman status on WOW </li></ul></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>But wait...There's more! </li></ul></ul>
  6. 6. “ Student Retention” package <ul><ul><li>Preferential registration slots - first in line to enroll in the classes YOU want! </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Personalized  Tutoring </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Email: $9.99 per class or .99 per use, Chat: $19.99 or 1.99 per use, Phone $29.99/2.99 per use. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>During tests: 25% surcharge </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Student VIP lounge in every building </li></ul></ul>
  7. 7. “ Retention PLUS” <ul><ul><li>Premium Faculty Access (after hours or 2pm, whichever comes first) </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Concierge Beverage Service  – Redbull and Lattes delivered to your classroom!  Order via smartphone! </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Course Completion Insurance (if you get sick - our tutors will finish the course for you) </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Monthly drawing: “Get out of jail free” pass for Turn-it-in violations! </li></ul></ul>
  8. 8. “ Course Content Wizard” <ul><ul><li>Taped Lectures are free.   Faculty notes .99 per session; Access to group notes .99 </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Digital Content: Basic content is free, Pro Pak  includes flash examples @.99 each, syllabus updates, and accurate page numbers . </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Content Upgrade Notifications (pop-up notification) “Do you want to upgrade to the latest content for .99?” </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Subscription Extension Service: Digital content updates beyond the class ($12.99/yr) </li></ul></ul>
  9. 9. Residual Knowledge Value Insurance <ul><ul><li>In many disciplines - the knowledge itself is at risk - the currency of the information deteriorates at 25% per year </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Students don’t want to be caught underwater or upside down with old, outdated knowledge.   Don't let this happen to you! >>> </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>For $29.99 per course per year, your students can guarantee their knowledge will always be kept up to date (No need to worry - we provide a recurring perpetual-approved charge to VISA/MasterCard) </li></ul></ul>After 2 years After 5 years New Graduate
  10. 10. “ The Frequent Flyer” <ul><ul><li>Personal coat check and note-taker by request (availability limited) </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Early bird seating for each class session in extra wide plush fully reclining chairs with surround sound </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>iAccess to notes from 4.0 students ($5.99 per session - shared revenue with student, organized and prepared) </li></ul></ul>
  11. 11. “ The Sports Fanatic” <ul><ul><li>Premium Tailgate Parking + Seating in Dean's Skybox </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Cheer/Yell Leaders will &quot;Like&quot; your Facebook page. ...Repeatedly. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>In-game Twitter updates from starting players. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Access to one Half-time Locker Room Pep Talk (must sign profanity and personal injury waiver)   </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>All for $39.99 per game! </li></ul></ul>
  12. 12. &quot;Lord of the Classroom&quot; <ul><ul><li>Inflatable student: $2.99/session  (M/ F/ Metro available) </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Intelligent Emulator  (students using this service scored on average  one full grade higher  on tests and papers) </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Custom Transcripts.   Includes unlimited upload access to national portable transcript database (+ 1 free upgrade to final class score, additional at $129.99 per upgrade) </li></ul></ul>
  13. 13. Get a Room... Your Name Goes Here!!!
  14. 14. Q: “Is This Seat Taken?”   A: &quot;Never!&quot; <ul><ul><li>Reserved Seating in large lecture sessions </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Front five rows are free </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Back row = 3.99 per session - 29.99 per term </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Extra leg room / aisle seats: .99 premium/9.99 per term </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Electrical outlet: .99 per session </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Cushions: .99 per session </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>“ Irritating Guy” insurance: $25/term </li></ul></ul></ul>
  15. 15. &quot;Cafe Courses&quot; <ul><ul><li>Bistro and beverage service during most classes, full lunch for noon-hour classes </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Complimentary cocktails  for all classes scheduled between 5:00pm - 7:00pm </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>A la Carte Content Menu.  Learn what you want in the order you want </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>A steamy hot washcloth  after each lecture ! </li></ul></ul>
  16. 16. Freemium Restroom Access <ul><ul><li>Pay toilets… with a swipe ! (…of your credit card) </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Standard – cleaned once a week  by students, generic tissue on stingy dispensers </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Premium – cleaned daily by professionals, fresh cotton towels, “ All you can use ” Charmin tissue </li></ul></ul>
  17. 17. For commuter campuses: Parking Lotto! <ul><ul><li>Rub-off cards that pay out in preferential parking locations. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Auctions, auctions, auctions: Not just the president’s parking spot anymore! Or choose from: </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Faculty lounge pass (with 2 free drinks - top shelf excluded) </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Mention in an upcoming presidential speech </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Late for class? Valet parking with express golf cart to classroom service (8.99 per hour) </li></ul></ul>
  18. 18. “ Faculty On Call” Our answer to escalating overhead <ul><ul><li>Increasingly most faculty will not be full-time but will piece together careers teaching multiple courses for many different providers </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Never hire another faculty member again! </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>For a 12% fee we are your national leader in world-class faculty placement services - providing one-stop hiring and firing HR service for universities - and finding adjunct employment opportunities for faculty </li></ul></ul>
  19. 19. “ Faculty On Call” Our answer to escalating overhead <ul><ul><li>Vetted though national criminal, sex offender and no-fly lists </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Our guarantee: Most of our Faculty On Call will be content specialists in the areas they teach! </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Note: While many faculty reside in the US not all faculty may be US residents </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Low-cost group health insurance as a benefit   </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>We'll make you an offer you can't refuse! </li></ul></ul>
  20. 20. You Learn - We Earn A Way Forward - with Maximum Revenue K eep college profitable E ducation that earns G enerate maximum revenue G et more out of college (students) E levate your bottom-line R ealize increased sustainability