THEY WOULD NEVER ADMIT…
A SNARKY (YET RELATIVELY TRUE) COLLECTION OF
THINGS YOUR BIG NETWORKING VENDOR WOULD NEVER SAY OUT LOUD

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
STANDARDS
“OUR PROPRIETARY TECHNOLOGY LOCK? YEAH, TCP/IP MADE THAT DISAPPEAR IN THE ’90s.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
ANNUITY
“WE DESIGN OUR HARDWARE SO YOU HAVE TO KEEP UPGRADING.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
MYTH
“WE DON’T USE ASICS FOR PERFORMANCE. BUT IT’S IMPORTANT THAT YOU BELIEVE WE DO.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
“INTEL’S SHEER R&D SCALE BLEW THROUGH OUR ABILITY TO KEEP UP YEARS AGO.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
AVAILABILITY
“SORRY ABOUT THE DOWN TIME… OUR SOFTWARE GOT AWAY FROM US A LONG TIME AGO.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
INTEROPERABILITY
“WE DON’T ACTUALLY CONTROL THE INTERNET PROTOCOL, BUT IT’S FUN MAKING PEOPLE THINK WE DO.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
HONESTY
“SURE, OPEN-SOURCE WORKS FINE. WE’VE BEEN USING IT IN OUR PRODUCTS FOR YEARS.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
VIRTUALIZATION
“IF YOUR NETWORK DEVICES BECOME VIRTUAL MACHINES, WE’LL LOSE OUR LOCK ON YOU.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
SUCCESS
“NONE OF OUR SALES ARE AS IMPORTANT AS ALL OF OUR SALES.”

They Would Never Admit… 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
VALUE
“SEVENTY CENTS OUT OF EVERY DOLLAR WE TAKE FROM YOU IS GROSS PROFIT.”

Dear Reader:
1.Big networking vendors obviously don’t say these things.
2.That doesn’t make them less true.
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