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Georgia Common Core Coach, CCGPS Edition, Composition, Level I

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Composition exercises support students in constructing more complex, sophisticated writing, as required by the Common Core Georgia Performance Standards. …

Composition exercises support students in constructing more complex, sophisticated writing, as required by the Common Core Georgia Performance Standards.
The first two lessons of Georgia Common Core Coach, CCGPS Edition, Composition provide the foundation for the remaining lessons. With the first lesson walking students through the writing process from start to finish, and the second lesson taking them through the entire research process. The second unit of the book offers lessons on specific writing types that are outlined in the Common Core Georgia Performance Standards.

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  • 1. This book is printed on paper containinga minimum of 10% post-consumer waste.www.triumphlearning.comPhone: (800) 338-6519 • Fax: (866) 805-5723 • E-mail: customerservice@triumphlearning.comFirst EditionCommonCoreCoachDevelopedExclusivelyfortheCCSSYourInstructionalAnchor!ISBN-13: 978-1-62362-025-79 7 8 1 6 2 3 6 2 0 2 5 79 0 0 0 0CommonCoreCoach•CompositionICommonCoreCoachIT238NAforCompositionThis book is printed on paper containinga minimum of 10% post-consumer waste.www.triumphlearning.comPhone: (800) 338-6519 • Fax: (866) 805-5723 • E-mail: customerservice@triumphlearning.comCommonCoreCoachforCompositionICommonCoreCoachCommonCoreCoachDevelopedExclusivelyfortheCCGPSYourInstructionalAnchor!ISBN-13: 978-1-62362-053-09 7 8 1 6 2 3 6 2 0 5 3 09 0 0 0 0GEORGIAGEORGIAT142GAFirst EditionCCGPSEditionforCompositionI
  • 2.         H SGeorgia Common Core Coach for Composition I, First Edition T142GA ISBN-13: 978-1-62362-053-0Cover Image Credit: © Ramin Talale/Bloomberg/Bloomberg via Getty ImagesTriumph Learning®136 Madison Avenue, 7th Floor, New York, NY 10016 © 2014 Triumph Learning, LLC. All rights reserved. No part of this publication maybe reproduced in whole or in part, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording orotherwise, without written permission from the publisher.Printed in the United States of America.  10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1The National Governors Association Center for Best Practices and Council of Chief State School Officers are the sole owners and developers of the CommonCore State Standards, © Copyright 2010. All rights reserved.CommonCoreCoachFirst EditionIGEORGIAforCompositionCC13_ELA_L1C_FM_SE 1 5/7/13 3:03 PM
  • 3. Duplicatinganypartofthisbookisprohibitedbylaw.©2014TriumphLearning,LLC3ContentsUnit 1 — Writing FoundationsLesson 1: The Writing Process . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5Brainstorm. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8Plan. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10Draft. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12Revise. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16Edit. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 20Publish . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24Lesson 2: The Research Process. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25Generate Research Questions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28Develop a Research Plan . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31Use Search Techniques. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33Explore Types of Sources . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 35Evaluate and Compare Sources. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41Take Notes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44Cite Sources and Avoid Plagiarism. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50Unit 2 — Writing for Different PurposesLesson 3: Writing Responses to Literature . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53Lesson 4: Writing Informative Texts . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71Lesson 5: Writing Arguments. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 87Lesson 6: Writing Narratives . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 103Grammar and Mechanics Guide . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 119Glossary. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 145Common CoreGeorgia PerformanceStandards (GPS)W.9–10.1.d,W.9–10.2.b,W.9–10.2.d,W.9–10.2.e,W.9–10.3.d,W.9–10.4,W.9–10.5,W.9–10.6,W.9–10.10, SL.9–10.1,L.9–10.2.cW.9–10.2.a,W.9–10.7,W.9–10.8,W.9–10.10SL.9–10.1W.9–10.1.c,W.9–10.2.c,W.9–10.9.a–b,W.9–10.10,SL.9–10.1, L.9–10.1.aW.9–10.2.a–f,W.9–10.10,SL.9–10.1, L.9–10.2.a–bW.9–10.1.a–e,W.9–10.2.e,W.9–10.10, SL.9–10.1,L.9–10.1.bW.9–10.3.a–e,W.9–10.10,SL.9–10.1, L.9–10.1CC13_ELA_L1C_FM_SE 3 5/7/13 3:03 PM
  • 4. Lesson1The WritingProcessThink about your favorite authors. How dothey create those books you love to read?Do they just sit with a computer and type outwhatever comes to mind, hoping that readerswill find it interesting? Of course not! Goodwriters follow a writing process that helpsthem craft and refine their ideas.In this lesson, you will learn about theindividual steps of the writing process. As youexplore what happens in each stage, you willlook at an example of another student’swriting to see what he is doing well andwhere he needs to improve. You will also getto practice each step on your own as yourespond to a writing prompt. Additionally, youwill learn some important skills for using styleand language in your writing.By the end of the lesson, you should havea renewed understanding of what it takes tocreate strong and powerful writing.Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 5CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 5 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 5. What Is the Writing Process?1. BrainstormWhen you brainstorm, list ideas about a topic to get yourwriting started. As you jot down ideas, remind yourself ofyour purpose and consider how your audience will receiveyour response. Then begin to think about details you mightinclude in your writing.2. PlanAs you plan your writing, decide on a thesis statementand then gather and organize your ideas in written form, suchas in an outline or graphic organizer. Consider which detailswill best support your thesis. Some forms of writing, suchas a personal narrative, do not contain a thesis statement.If you are writing a narrative, you will decide onyour plot, characters, and setting at this stage.3. DraftNext, create a draft by writing an organized text with anintroduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Carefullyselect language to convey your ideas in interesting ways,and make sure that your sentences and paragraphsfollow a logical order.Writing is a vehicle for you to show what you know about a topic or text. In orderto get credit for having great ideas, though, you must convey them in a focused,sophisticated manner. A well-written piece is the result of careful forethought andplanning.As you look at a writing prompt or assignment for the first time, your task mayseem daunting. You may think: How do I explain everything that’s going on in myhead in a way that my readers will understand? How do I show connections fromone idea to another? On top of all of that, I have to make sure my writing usescorrect spelling, grammar, and mechanics, too?It seems like a very tall order! That’s why the best writers break their writingprocess into smaller steps. Each step has different elements for you to focus onso you will never get too overwhelmed by the task ahead of you. No matter whatkind of writing you do, allow the following steps to guide you in composing athoughtful and polished written piece.6  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 6 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 6. 4. ReviseWhen you revise, look for ways to make your writing’sstructure, ideas, and language all work toward the same goal.It is often helpful to have someone else review your writing inorder to get additional feedback for your final draft.5. EditTo edit your writing, read it carefully to find and correct anyerrors in standard English conventions, including grammar,spelling, punctuation, and capitalization.6. PublishFinally, publish your writing so that other people can readwhat you have written. Publishing can mean anything fromhanding in a piece to your teacher to entering anonline writing contest.Write about a time when you had to make a difficult decision. Describe thesituation, the choices that were available, the decision you made, and theconsequences of your actions. Looking back, would you have acted differ-ently if given the chance? Use details and examples to explain and supportyour ideas.Writing AssignmentThe following prompt asks you to write a personal narrative. Refer to this promptas you work through the steps of the writing process.Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 7CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 7 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 7. BrainstormBrainstorming is the very first step in the writing process. You won’t be doingmuch actual writing of your composition at this stage. When you brainstorm, youactivate your thoughts by writing down whatever comes into your mind about yourtopic. As you let your imagination go to work, some of your best ideas may emerge.The prompts you encounter will vary. Some will be very specific, such as: Writeabout an important person in your life. Other prompts will be more general and willrequire more analytical thinking, such as: Make an argument for a policy you thinkwould improve your school. Occasionally, you will write about a topic of your choice.In each case, you should brainstorm to decide how to approach the topic. Your goalis to narrow a broad topic to a specific topic that you can write well about.Brainstorming can be a messy process. You may jot down a couple of ideas,cross one out, and then scribble a new idea in the margin. That’s okay—it meansyour mind is hard at work. Don’t worry too much about what you write during thisstep. Instead, write down all of your thoughts. That will make it easier for you todevelop your ideas. Think of it this way: as you write, you are building a written textfrom the ground up. You don’t begin by making the finishing touches; you begin bydeciding what kind of structure you want to build.Let’s walk through the process by studying a mentor text. Look at how a studentbrainstormed for the following prompt.Write about a time you faced a challenge that you overcame. Describe the situa-tion, the specific obstacles you faced, how you overcame the challenge, andwhat you learned as a result. Use details and examples to explain and supportyour ideas.Brainstorm a TopicTo choose and narrow your topic, you can do several things: freewrite, make lists,jot down words, create tables, or develop webs.Here’s how the student brainstormed to choose a topic for his personal narrative.Topic: A time I faced a challenge What I Learned as a Result1.  Losing my dog in fifth grade I was so sad. Sure that Ollie was goneforever. Angry about the gate beingbroken. Ollie came home. I fixed the gate.2.  Having surgery on my knee A terrible situation. But things kepthappening to make me feel better. Endedwell even with pain and frustration.3.  Moving to a new house Didn’t want to move to Chestnut St.Thought I’d never see my friends.Learned to make plans ahead of time.8  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 8 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 8. Brainstorm Supporting IdeasOnce you have chosen the topic you’ll use to respond to the prompt, brainstormsome more. As you select ideas related to that topic, make sure that you haveenough material to complete your writing task.The student decided to use a graphic organizer to brainstormideas for the topic he chose.Topic: Challenge I FacedWhat I Learned: Having a knee injury was reallyawful, but things kept happening to boost myspirits. Even with all the pain and frustration,it was satisfying to help myself recover.Event: My teammatescame to visit in thehospital.My response: I feltencouraged by themand my family.Event: During a basketballgame, I collapsed with aknee injury and had to havesurgery.My response: I was upsetbecause my basketballseason was ruined.Event: I worked hard torecover from the surgery.My response: I felt a lotof physical pain andfrustration.Event: My team won thedivision championship.My response: Myspirits were boosted.Event: My sister waskind to me.My response: Heractions cheered me up.Support  In the brainstormingstage, writers can jot down anyideas, details, or events they thinkmight be important to their topic.This student includes descriptionsof events and his responses tothem. Draw a star next to theevent that will probably appearfirst in his personal narrative.Topic  The prompt asks students todescribe what they learned as aresult of a challenge. Circle the sen-tence that contributes to the answer.Details  Many of the eventdetails that writers collect duringthe brainstorming process will bedeveloped throughout the writingprocess. For example, what kinds ofadditional details might be addedto “My sister was kind to me”?Writing AssignmentNow it’s time for you to brainstorm for the prompt on page 7 that you will developinto a personal narrative throughout this lesson. Use a graphic organizer, a list, oranother method to brainstorm ideas for your writing. You may use your own paper.Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 9CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 9 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 9. PlanIn the planning stage, you set a direction for your composition. This meansdeciding exactly what you want to say about your topic and how you will say it. Todo this, you should take the various ideas you came up with while brainstormingand then organize them into a plan that will guide you as you write.When you plan your writing, first you need to decide what your thesis, or state-ment of your main idea, will be. What idea do you want to convey to your reader?The thesis indicates to your readers what information the rest of the response willcommunicate. As your writing progresses, you may find yourself reevaluating yourthesis. This is normal, but it’s a good idea to make sure you are fairly happy withyour thesis early in the process. Different kinds of writing require different kinds ofthesis statements, as shown in the chart below.In a/an . . . Your thesis will . . .response to literature present a concise analysis of some partof a work of literature.informative text state in a claim the results of yourresearch.argument assert your position and preview yourmain supporting reasons.personal narrative present a topic or experience andprovide a statement of reflection.The next step in planning is organizing your ideas. One way to organize is tocreate an outline that clearly and briefly describes what you plan to include in thedifferent parts of your composition. A typical outline includes headings and piecesof information below them, often with Roman numerals, letters of the alphabet,numbers, or bullets to label individual ideas. Once you have created an outline, itwill keep you focused on your topic as you write.When you develop an outline or any other type of plan for your writing, you donot have to write in complete sentences. Feel free to record your ideas in words andphrases. You are making a map to use as the basis for a stronger structure whenyou write a draft. In the draft stage and the stages following it, you can flesh outyour paragraphs with well-constructed sentences.Continue to think about who will be reading your writing (audience) and why youare writing (purpose) when you form your thesis and develop your writing plan.10  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 10 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 10. Here is an outline the student prepared to organize the ideas he plans to includein his personal narrative.Thesis  In the thesis statementof a personal narrative, the writershould introduce the experience heor she is writing about. Is this astrong thesis? Why or why not?Supporting Details  In anoutline, you jot down notes aboutthe supporting details you willuse to support your main points.In a personal narrative, you willwant to use descriptive details tomake the events come alive forthe reader. Circle two places inthe outline where you canimagine the author developingdescriptive detail.Conclusion  In the conclusionof this personal narrative, the stu-dent will reflect on what he haslearned from the experience. Drawa box around the statement thatshows that the student is alreadybeginning to gather ideas about areflection on his injury.Writing AssignmentNow it’s time for you to plan your personal narrative in response to the prompton page 7. Using the thesis statement and the supporting details you generatedduring your brainstorming, organize your thoughts on a separate sheet of paper.Use an outline form you are comfortable with.I. IntroductionThesis  After my basketball injury, my life changedin unexpected ways.• I pass the ball to Geraldo and he shoots;everyone is excited.• I fall to the floor in pain.• I hear my uncle’s voice call for ambulance.II. SupportIdea #1  I wake up in hospital confused.• I learn about surgery during phoneconversation.• Mom cries.• I feel terrible about basketball.Idea #2  People respond to my surgery.• doctor visits• friends visit, make jokes, talk about winning• Mom and other family often thereIdea #3  I spend a lot of time working to healmy knee.• I feel a lot of pain—sweat, nausea, blurryvisionIdea #4  I go home from hospital and keepworking.• exercises• moving on crutchesIdea #5  Each time I was discouraged, somethingmade me feel better.• team winning• little sister being nice to meIII. Conclusion• Team went on to win next game without me.• I got to attend the game.• I had a sense of satisfaction—knew that I hadbeen changed by experience.Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 11CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 11 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 11. DraftIn the drafting stage of writing, you form all of your ideas as well-constructedsentences and paragraphs with your audience and purpose in mind. These para-graphs must be organized in a logical way, or readers might not understand whatyou are trying to communicate. Luckily, you have already collected and organizedmany ideas in your writing plan. Now it is a matter of turning that plan into awell-developed response. Almost all writing you do will use a simple framework,including an introduction, a body, and a conclusion.• In the introduction, you clearly and briefly tell your reader what you are writingabout. A strong introduction could grab the reader’s attention by asking anintriguing question, by defining a term, or by providing an interesting fact oridea. Usually, an introduction contains a thesis statement.• In the body of your writing, you tell your readers what you want them to knowabout your topic, using facts, details, examples, or quotations in structuredparagraphs. Each paragraph should contain one key idea, followed by specificdetails supporting or illustrating that idea. You will want each of your para-graphs, in turn, to support the overall main idea of your writing. Paragraphs thatwander too far from your thesis will distract your reader, weakening the piece.Details may be arranged in chronological order, by cause and effect, byproblem and solution, from general to specific, or in a variety of other ways.Choose the organizational method that makes the most sense for the kind ofinformation you are presenting. Narratives often rely on chronological order toestablish a sense of how events took place, while scientific or technical textsmay be arranged by cause and effect to show how particular outcomes werereached. Arguments tend to have the strongest supporting ideas early on in thetext, with weaker ideas toward the end of the text.Within each paragraph, your ideas should flow easily. To help one idea flowinto the next, use transitions such as first, next, however, after, additionally,because, and therefore to make connections. As you write your body para-graphs, try to use a variety of sentence types. Mixing short sentences withcomplex sentences will help avoid monotony and keep your readers engaged.• Finally, a conclusion wraps up your composition by summarizing what youhave said about your topic and perhaps by giving your reader somethingfurther to think about. For example, if you are writing a personal narrative,your conclusion may provide final details about an event as well as your ownreflections on the event. In an argument, your conclusion will reassert yourposition and make a final appeal to the reader to accept your argument.12  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 12 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 12. As I raced down the court with the ball, I quicklyscanned my eyes to my left and saw my cousin Geraldoleaping into the air with his arms raised. As usual, Geraldo’stiming and mine were just about perfect. I took one quick stepto the left and passed the ball, which Geraldo caught and shotin one fluid movement, sinking the basket. The fans in thegymnasium, my mother and Geraldo’s mother included,erupted. But just as I leaned forward to give Geraldo a high five,my left foot twisted and I collapsed to the floor. Sharp pain shotup my leg to my knee. The last thing I heard was my uncle’svoice shouting for an ambulance. What I didn’t realize was thatI was just about to learn what really mattered in life.When I woke up, I was lying in a hospital bed, very con-fused. I could hear the murmur of voices in the distance. Myeyes were as heavy as lead, so I didn’t bother to open them forsome time. As I became more alert, however, I could recognizemy mother’s voice, speaking to my grandmother on the phone.“He collapsed during the game, and when they did some tests,they realized they had to do surgery right away.” Then I heardmy mother begin to cry softly.Surgery! We were one game away from winning the basket-ball championship in our division, which would send us toregionals. I had a lot more games to play in! This was my lastyear to play basketball with my cousin Geraldo, who was grad-uating in the spring. Also, I couldn’t let down my coach, whohad given me the opportunity to play basketball when I trans-ferred to Central High School last year.But when Dr. Curtis came into my room an hour later, sheconfirmed that I had indeed had surgery on my knee and thatmy basketball season was over for this year. The pain throbbingin my knee was nothing compared to the agony I felt when shespoke those words.The next morning, Geraldo and some of my other team-mates came by to see me at the hospital. I expected them to bemoping when they walked into my room, but instead, theycame in laughing and making jokes.“We’re gonna win this for you, Lee,” Geraldo said, giving methe thumbs-up sign. He even gave me a pat on the hand whennobody was looking. My mom was at the hospital most of thetime, and other family members came by to cheer me on.Here is a draft of the student’s personal narrative about facing and overcoming a challenge.This is a fairly late draft, after the student had time to revise and edit.Introduction  Did younotice how the student grabsreaders’ attention by starting thenarrative right in the middle of theaction? Underline the sentencethat first tells you where the eventis taking place.Sentence Variety  Usingdifferent sentence types keeps thereader interested. This studentuses a good variety of sentencetypes. Draw a wavy line undersentences in paragraph 2 thatbegin with the subject. Draw starsnext to sentences that begin withintroductory phrases.Dialogue  This student usesdialogue, or a speaker’s exactwords, to help develop the bodyof the narrative. Do you thinkGeraldo’s line of dialogue iseffective? Why or why not?Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 13CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 13 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 13. But most of my time in the hospital was spent working.I had to slowly move my knee, little by little at first. Sometimesthe pain was so bad that streams of sweat would start pouringdown my face. Other times, I felt nauseated from the combina-tion of medication and exhaustion. I’d look out the window ofthe room and everything seemed blurry.After a week, I was discharged from the hospital, but myefforts had just begun. Next, I had to work for three days a weekwith a physical therapist, who gave me more exercises to do athome. I also had to learn how to walk around my house, andeventually the school bus and school building, on crutches.There were times when my arms throbbed and felt dead tired.But every time I thought I could not take another minute ofpain or frustration, something would happen to boost myspirits. Sometimes it would be something big—like my teamdedicating the division championship to me. Other times, itwould be something quite small, like my little sister Avi bring-ing me a glass of ice water and singing me a song she was learn-ing in preschool.Life went on. My basketball team went on to win theregional championship about a month after my injury. I wasnot on the court to help my teammates out. But I was sitting onthe bench next to the coach, with my knee elevated on an extrachair. I had a feeling of strength in my heart because I hadlearned how much more important people were than sports.Write about a time when you had to make a difficult decision. Describe thesituation, the choices that were available, the decision you made, and theconsequences of your actions. Looking back, would you have acted differ-ently, if given the chance? Use details and examples to explain and supportyour ideas.Transitions  Do you see thedifferent transitions the studentuses to show the passage of time?Draw a box around any transitionsin paragraph 7.Details  Pay attention tohow this student uses details todescribe what happens duringhis recovery. Circle the detailsthat help the reader imagine hissister’s actions. Conclusion  To conclude thepersonal narrative, this studentmakes a statement reflecting on hisexperience. Draw two lines underthis sentence in the conclusion.Writing AssignmentNow it’s your turn. Write a draft of your personal narrative on a computer or on aseparate sheet of paper.14  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 14 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 14. Formal StyleWhen you are writing for school (and later, for work), you should use formallanguage. Formal language consists of correct grammar and carefully selectedwords that convey a sophisticated, professional style. It doesn’t use slang or havean overly casual tone. For example, you would never include the following sentencein academic writing: “Katerina worked hard and completed a totally legit report onthe discovery of DNA.” Instead, you would use the word excellent or superb.In the mentor text excerpt below, circle the words and phrases that use aformal style.But when Dr. Curtis came into my room an hour later, she confirmed that Ihad indeed had surgery on my knee and that my basketball season was overfor this year. The pain throbbing in my knee was nothing compared to theagony I felt when she spoke those words.Though most writing you do in class requires a formal style, there are occasionswhen you can use more informal language. If you are writing a narrative, forexample, you may wish to use casual language in your dialogue to reflect the waya person really speaks.Read the sentences below. Rewrite each sentence so that it uses the appropriateformal style for writing in a school setting.1. Those Congressional guys finally wanted to work out all that money stuff. 2. My mama’s put in a lot of hours at the factory, which seems crazy to me. Try ItLesson 1  •  The Writing Process 15CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 15 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 15. ReviseRevising is the writing stage in which you get to look at your writing from a dif-ferent angle—as a reader! You have been brainstorming, planning, and drafting yourcontent. Now look for ways to improve the focus, structure, ideas, and language.When you revise, think again about the audience and purpose you identifiedearlier. Do your language choices fit the audience? Why are you writing? Is therecontent that should be adjusted to help you better fulfill that purpose?Sometimes when revising, you may consider taking a new approach. For exam-ple, the mentor text is written from the first-person point of view, but personalnarratives can also be written from the third-person point of view. Consider how adifferent approach might change your writing. Would it address your purpose?Precise Language and Concrete DetailsAs you revise your writing, use precise language and concrete details toconvey and develop your topic. Include specific details and sensory language tocreate a vivid picture of experiences, events, settings, or characters. For example,the following sentence is from an early version of the mentor text.I went down the court and looked for my cousin Geraldo.Does this sentence help you to picture the experiences of the speaker? Addingsensory details would help the reader to relate to those experiences. Adding vividaction verbs would help the reader visualize events. Now read the revised sentence.As I raced down the court with the ball, I quickly scanned my eyes to my leftand saw my cousin Geraldo leaping into the air with his arms raised.Now the reader can visualize the writer in the final moments before his injury.When you are writing about a specific subject area or field, be sure to revise fordomain-specific vocabulary that provides the right level of detail. For example, ifyou are writing an informational text about a parachute, you should use vocabularythat is specific and technical, such as main canopy and pilot chute.Replace each of the vague phrases below with a more precise word or phrase.1. my musical instrument 2. her car Try It16  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 16 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 16. Take a look at the following paragraph from the first draft of thenarrative about facing a challenge. Then compare it to the sameparagraph from the final draft to see what kinds of changes thestudent made when he revised his narrative.First DraftI was discharged from the hospital, but my efforts hadjust begun. Three days a week, I had to work with a physicaltherapist, who gave me more exercises to do at home. I alsohad to learn how to move around my house and eventuallythe school bus and school building on crutches. At times, myarmpits hurt. But every time I thought I could not take anotherminute of pain or frustration, something would happen toboost my spirits. Sometimes it would be something big. Othertimes, it would be something quite small.Examining the organization of your writing is an important aspect of revision.Without a logical organizational structure, readers lose their way. When you revise fororganization, ask yourself whether you should rearrange or add paragraphs that sup-port your overall writing purpose. Sometimes you may find a paragraph that needs tocome out altogether because it does not support the main purpose of your writing.Take a look at each individual paragraph to be sure that there is one central ideathat is supported by other details. If not, you will want to make changes. This maymean altering a topic sentence or providing more detail within a paragraph. Addi-tionally, you want to be sure that your sentences are strong and varied. Do not tryto make every sentence wordy and complicated. Check that you have used a goodbalance of longer and shorter sentences.Finally, look through your draft for places where you may need to include transi-tional words, phrases, and sentences to help connect the ideas between and withinparagraphs. Transitions are signposts that help show your reader where you aregoing and where you have been. Common transitions include for example, but,although, however, as a result, first, and finally.Transitions  Transitions con-nect the ideas within and betweensentences and paragraphs. A tran-sitional phrase at the beginningof this paragraph would help thereader understand more aboutthe student’s discharge from thehospital. What transition mightthe student use?PRECISE LANGUAGE  Preciselanguage is specific and descrip-tive, creating interesting and vividprose for the reader. What wordsor phrases could the student useto better describe his pain fromthe crutches?ADDING DETAIL  To make ideasclear and to draw readers into anarrative, writers need to providespecific details to show what theymean. What could this studentadd to show the reader the kindsof things that happened to boosthis spirits?Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 17CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 17 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 17. Revised DraftAfter a week, I was discharged from the hospital, but myefforts had just begun. Next, I had to work for three days aweek with a physical therapist, who gave me more exercisesto do at home. I also had to learn how to walk around myhouse, and eventually the school bus and school building,on crutches. There were times when my arms throbbed andfelt dead tired.But every time I thought I could not take another minute ofpain or frustration, something would happen to boost my spir-its. Sometimes it would be something big—like my team dedi-cating the division championship to me. Other times, it wouldbe something quite small, like my little sister Avi bringing mea glass of ice water and singing me a song she was learning inpreschool.Revise a DraftNow it is your turn to revise a paragraph from an early draft of the student’spersonal narrative. Read the excerpt below and write a revision on a separatesheet of paper.TRANSITIONS  The studentadded the transitional phraseAfter a week at the beginning ofthis paragraph, which tells thereader the time frame and movesthe narrative to the next idea.Circle other transitional phrasesthe student uses in this paragraph.PRECISE LANGUAGE  Noticehow the student changed my arm-pits hurt to my arms throbbed andfelt dead tired. What does the pre-cise language tell you about howthe student was feeling?ADDING DETAIL  The studentadded specific examples of big orlittle things that helped to boosthis spirits. Underline two examplesof details the student added.Try ItI always loved basketball. Even as a kid. When I was six years old I beggedmy mother to buy me a basketball hoop for the driveway. Though we didn’thave much room for it. I watched every basketball game shown on TV. I alsowatched football and hockey. When tryouts were announced for my school’sbasketball team, I knew I wanted to play. I was having a great time on the teamuntil one game changed everything and nothing would be the same again.18  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 18 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 18. When you conduct a peer review, you work with a partner to improve your draft.You will want to follow certain etiquette so that your interactions are constructive.The purpose is to improve writing; it is never a criticism of the writer. Writers, how-ever, need to be receptive to criticism so that they can improve their writing.Begin by telling your peers what works well in their writing so that they can usethose techniques again. Be specific in stating why something works well. For exam-ple, “I liked the descriptive detail here because I could imagine that I was standingin the dark forest myself.”Offer criticism as specific feedback related to the writing. Do not give vaguecomments, such as, “I don’t think it’s well written.” Provide specific problems andsuggested solutions, such as, “I think you were trying to support the main idea here,but this detail is not clear. Can you restate it in more specific language?”Another helpful technique is to ask peers to explain why they wrote what they didor why they used certain organization or language. This allows writers to rethinktheir own process and consider revisions as they talk to you.Here are some questions that you can ask as you review a peer’s writing:• Does the introduction grab the reader’s attention and reveal the main idea orthesis of the written piece?• Does each body paragraph support the main idea or thesis and include effec-tive supporting or descriptive details?• Is the organization of the written piece logical?• Does the conclusion summarize the main points or emphasize the author’sfinal ideas?• Are the language and style appropriate for the audience and purpose?Writing AssignmentExchange your draft with a peer and use the peer review forms provided byyour teacher to review each other’s work. Remember to be thoughtful andconstructive in your comments, and take a few minutes to discuss your feedbackwith your classmate.Once you are finished with your peer review, it’s time to revise your draft.Read through your draft with a critical eye and make changes using the revisionchecklist your teacher has provided or one of your own. Be sure to incorporateany helpful comments or suggestions from your peer review. You may composeyour revised draft on a computer or a separate sheet of paper.Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 19CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 19 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 19. EditIn the editing stage of writing, you make sure your revised draft follows the con-ventions of standard English. Editing involves checking that you have used gram-mar, spelling, punctuation, and capitalization correctly.There are several strategies that can make the editing process more efficient andrewarding. One strategy is to read your passage aloud—or have a classmate, friend,or family member read it aloud to you. As you hear the words, grammar mistakeswill become more obvious to you. Additionally, if you read the text while a classmatereads it aloud, you may also notice spelling, capitalization, and punctuation mis-takes more easily.Some writers even like to read a text backward when editing, starting with thelast sentence and reading each sentence by itself. When you look at the sentencein isolation, its strengths or possible weaknesses may become much clearer.You probably know which mistakes you make most often when writing, so keepthose in mind when you edit. For example, if you know that you often misuse com-mas, double-check your use of commas wherever they appear. Maybe you have atendency to misspell the same words over and over. Be sure to look for those, usinga dictionary to check difficult words.Use these editing marks to correct any errors you find. Insert parentheses Insert em dash Close up space# Add space Indent ^ Insert Delete ^ Insert hyphen Transpose Insert period ,^ Insert comma ^’ Insert apostrophe^“ Insert quotation marks Capitalize Lowercasen Insert en dash New paragraph20  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 20 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 20. When I woke up, I was laying in a hospital bed, veryconfused. I could hear the murmur of voices in the distance.My eyes were heavy as lead, so I didnt bother to open them forsome time. As I became more alert, however, I could recognizemy mother’s voice, spe aking to my grandmother on the phone.He collapsed during the game, and when they some did tests,they realized they had to do surgery write away.” Then I heardmy mother begin to cry softly.Surgery! We was one game away from winning thebasketball championship in our division, which would sendus to the regionals. I had alot more more games to play in!This was my last year to play basketball with my cousin Geraldo;who was graduating in the spring. Also, I couldn’t let down mycouch, who had given me the opportunity to play basketballwhen I transfer to Central High School last year.rightwere’a,redThis excerpt from a draft of a student’s response shows how the student used editingmarks to make corrections.Spelling  This student confusedthe words laying and lying, acommon mistake. How could heconfirm that he is using the correctmeaning?Subject-Verb Agreement The student made a subject-verbagreement error. He rememberedthat a plural subject needs a plu-ral verb, and the verb form wasis a singular form. Which wordis the subject of this sentence?How does his correction fix theagreement error?Semicolon  The student useda semicolon incorrectly in the sen-tence. A semicolon is only usedbetween independent clauses.Explain why a comma should beused here, instead.#^^“Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 21CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 21 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 21. SpellingWhen you are drafting a piece of writing, it’s easy to miss spelling errors. You willlikely be so focused on your ideas, organization, and content that smaller mistakesmight slip through. As you edit your draft, look carefully for spelling mistakes.Here are a few spelling rules to remember.• Put i before e except after c or when the two letters make a long a sound. Examples: relief, receive, weight• Add -es to words ending in -s, -sh, -ss, -x, -z, -ch to form plurals. Examples: mixes, watches• Change the f or fe to v and add -es to form plurals of words that end in -f or -fe. Examples: leaves, knives• Add the suffix -ed to a regular verb that ends with a consonant to make it pasttense. Example: washed• Add the suffix -d to a regular verb that ends with a vowel to make it past tense. Example: pursued• Change the y to i and add -es to form plurals of words that end with aconsonant and y. Examples: berries, follies• Keep the final y when adding the -ing ending whenever a single consonant pre-cedes the final y. Example: pity + -ing = pitying• Change the y to i and add the -s and -ed endings when a double consonantprecedes the final y. Example: carry + -ed = carried• Keep the final y and add the -s, -ed, and -ing endings when a vowel precedesthe final y. Examples: stay + -ed = stayed; employ + ing = employingRemember to watch out for commonly confused words that sound the sameor similar but have different meanings, such as where and wear or their, there,and they’re.Mechanics Review22  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 22 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 22. Find the spelling error in each sentence. Write the word correctly on the line nextto each sentence.  1. Next weekend, my neice Sophia will be visiting me by herself.  2. Which of the hats should William where to the baseball game?  3. I am grateful for the lifes of all my grandparents, each of whom hastaught me many important lessons.  4. When the students went up to get there awards, the audienceapplauded.  5. As the rain fell, the young woman hurryed to her car.  6. On our drive through the country, we passed several old churchs.  7. Many familys gather for meals at holidays.  8. The shelfs at the grocery store were almost empty.  9. The principal accompanyed the seniors on their class trip.10. Despite their arguement beforehand, the twins threw a great party.Try ItMechanics Review continuedWriting AssignmentNow edit your personal narrative, using the editing checklist your teacher hasprovided you or one of your own. You may work either on your computer or on aseparate sheet of paper.Write about a time you had to make a difficult decision. Describe the situation,the choices that were available, the decision you made, and the consequencesof your actions. Looking back, would you have acted differently if given thechance? Use details and examples to explain and support your ideas.Lesson 1  •  The Writing Process 23CC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 23 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 23. PublishWhen you publish your writing, you let other people read your work. Publishingis one of the most important stages of writing.To publish your piece, first create a neat final draft using a computer or a sepa-rate sheet of paper, making any final corrections of errors you found while editing.Also, give your written text a title that captures readers’ attention and effectivelydescribes your work.Now, think of ways to distribute your work to interested readers. This may meanturning in your piece to the teacher or letting friends and family read it. You can alsotry one of these ideas to find a wider audience for your written work:• Form a writing club with friends, in which you meet and discuss eachperson’s writing.• Create a brochure or poster, with photos or illustrations, to publicize yourwriting and attract readers’ interest.• Submit your writing to your school newspaper for publication.• Create a classroom magazine that includes examples by each student of thedifferent types of writing: response to literature, informative texts, argument,and personal narrative.• Meet in small groups to read your writing aloud, comparing and contrasting itwith other students’ writing.• Submit your writing to a writing contest.Technology Suggestions• Upload your writing to your class Web site or blog.• Save your work as a PDF document, and send it to family and friendsthrough e-mail.• Start a blog that discusses the topic of a recent writing assignment. Shareopinions on the topic, and then analyze what you learned from the discussion.• Record a podcast in which you read a piece of writing aloud. Invite classmatesto contribute to a recorded discussion of the written text.• Create a digital presentation of your writing, and share it with the class.Writing AssignmentOnce you have finished revising and editing your work, follow your teacher’sinstructions for publishing your final draft. Be sure to follow any formatting andsubmission guidelines your teacher or school may have.24  Lesson 1  •  The Writing ProcessCC13_ELA_L1C_U1_L1_SE 24 5/2/13 11:21 AM
  • 24. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 53Throughout your education, you have probably been asked towrite about many different kinds of texts. You may already knowthat a well-written response to literature must include carefulanalysis supported by specific evidence from the text you haveread. In this lesson, you will use the steps of the writing process tocompose a response about an excerpt from Charles Dickens’s novelGreat Expectations. Along the way, you’ll review and familiarizeyourself with skills such as developing a thesis, selectinginformation from a passage to support that thesis, and organizingyour ideas. The end result will be a thorough and thoughtful writtenresponse, demonstrating your understanding of the selection.Lesson3WritingResponses toLiteratureCC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 53 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 25. 54  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteratureWhat Is a Response to Literature?A response to literature is an analysis of the way a piece of literature functions,based on evidence provided by the text. Just as you might take apart a watch or atelevision to see how it works, writing a response to a passage requires breaking thepassage down into its parts. The purpose of such a response is to examine howeach part contributes to the whole.Sometimes, you will be assigned to write about a particular aspect of the pas-sage, such as its theme or use of sensory language. Other times, you will be able torespond to an element of the passage that you find the most intriguing. For exam-ple, you might explain how a character changes or develops over the course of thestory. Or you might examine a passage’s plot to investigate the way the authorbuilds the suspense that leads to a climax. Each passage provides countless ideasto explore.Whether you are responding to a prompt or writing about a topic of your choosing,the elements of your response should be the same: an introduction with a thesisstatement, a series of reasons that support the thesis, and a conclusion. As withother types of essays, effective support of your thesis is crucial. In writing a responseto literature, support will come in the form of direct evidence from the passage.Choose these details carefully; if the quotes and details you choose from the passagedo not support your thesis, then a reader will not find your analysis credible.IntroductionThe introduction contains the main idea for your responsein a thesis statement, along with supporting reasons.Reasons and Supporting DetailsEach paragraph following the introduction will supplya reason why the thesis is valid, supported bydetails, quotes, or examples from the passage.ConclusionThis part ties the response together, with a summary of theessay’s main points and a thoughtful restatement of the thesis.CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 54 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 26. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 55ReadRead the following passage. As you read, you may mark up the text byhighlighting, underlining, or writing notes in the margins to help yourunderstanding. After you’ve read the passage, you will be asked to writea response to it. The prompt will directly follow the passage. an excerpt fromGreat Expectations by Charles DickensOurs was the marsh country, down by the river, within, as the river wound, twentymiles of the sea. My first most vivid and broad impression of the identity of things seemsto me to have been gained on a memorable raw afternoon towards evening. At such atime I found out for certain that this bleak place overgrown with nettles was the church-yard; and that Philip Pirrip, late of this parish1, and also Georgiana wife of the above, weredead and buried; and that Alexander, Bartholomew, Abraham, Tobias, and Roger, infantchildren of the aforesaid, were also dead and buried; and that the dark flat wildernessbeyond the churchyard, intersected with dikes and mounds and gates, with scatteredcattle feeding on it, was the marshes; and that the low leaden line beyond was the river;and that the distant savage lair from which the wind was rushing was the sea; and thatthe small bundle of shivers growing afraid of it all and beginning to cry, was Pip.“Hold your noise!” cried a terrible voice, as a man started up from among the graves atthe side of the church porch. “Keep still, you little devil, or I’ll cut your throat!”A fearful man, all in coarse gray, with a great iron on his leg. A man with no hat, andwith broken shoes, and with an old rag tied round his head. A man who had been soakedin water, and smothered in mud, and lamed by stones, and cut by flints, and stung bynettles, and torn by briars; who limped, and shivered, and glared, and growled; andwhose teeth chattered in his head as he seized me by the chin.“Oh! Don’t cut my throat, sir,” I pleaded in terror. “Pray don’t do it, sir.”“Tell us your name!” said the man. “Quick!”“Pip, sir.”“Once more,” said the man, staring at me. “Give it mouth!”“Pip. Pip, sir.”“Show us where you live,” said the man. “Pint outthe place!”I pointed to where our village lay, on the flat in-shoreamong the alder-trees and pollards, a mile or more fromthe church.1parish  a geographical area under the leadership of a pastorCC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 55 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 27. 56  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteratureThe man, after looking at me for a moment, turned me upside down, and emp-tied my pockets. There was nothing in them but a piece of bread. When the churchcame to itself,—for he was so sudden and strong that he made it go head over heelsbefore me, and I saw the steeple under my feet,—when the church came to itself, I say,I was seated on a high tombstone, trembling while he ate the bread ravenously.“You young dog,” said the man, licking his lips, “what fat cheeks you ha’ got.”I believe they were fat, though I was at that time undersized for my years, andnot strong.“Darn me if I couldn’t eat em,” said the man, with a threatening shake of his head,“and if I han’t half a mind to’t!”I earnestly expressed my hope that he wouldn’t, and held tighter to the tombstone onwhich he had put me; partly, to keep myself upon it; partly, to keep myself from crying.“Now lookee here!” said the man. “Where’s your mother?”“There, sir!” said I.He started, made a short run, and stopped and looked over his shoulder.“There, sir!” I timidly explained. “Also Georgiana. That’s my mother.”“Oh!” said he, coming back. “And is that your father alonger your mother?”“Yes, sir,” said I; “him too; late of this parish.”“Ha!” he muttered then, considering. “Who d’ye live with,—supposin’ you’re kindlylet to live, which I han’t made up my mind about?”“My sister, sir,—Mrs. Joe Gargery,—wife of Joe Gargery, the blacksmith, sir.”“Blacksmith, eh?” said he. And looked down at his leg.After darkly looking at his leg and me several times, he came closer to my tombstone,took me by both arms, and tilted me back as far as he could hold me; so that his eyeslooked most powerfully down into mine, and mine looked most helplessly up into his.“Now lookee here,” he said, “the question being whether you’re to be let to live. Youknow what a file is?”“Yes, sir.”“And you know what wittles2is?”“Yes, sir.”After each question he tilted me over a little more, so as to give me a greater sense ofhelplessness and danger.“You get me a file.” He tilted me again. “And you get me wittles.” He tilted me again.“You bring ’em both to me.” He tilted me again. “Or I’ll have your heart and liver out.”He tilted me again.I was dreadfully frightened, and so giddy that I clung to him with both hands, andsaid, “If you would kindly please to let me keep upright, sir, perhaps I shouldn’t be sick,and perhaps I could attend more.”2wittles  slang for victuals, or foodCC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 56 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 28. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 57He gave me a most tremendous dip and roll, so that the church jumped over itsown weathercock.3Then, he held me by the arms, in an upright position on the topof the stone, and went on in these fearful terms:—“You bring me, to-morrow morning early, that file and them wittles. You bring the lotto me, at that old Battery over yonder. You do it, and you never dare to say a word ordare to make a sign concerning your having seen such a person as me, or any personsumever, and you shall be let to live. You fail, or you go from my words in any partickler,no matter how small it is, and your heart and your liver shall be tore out, roasted, andate. Now, I ain’t alone, as you may think I am. There’s a young man hid with me, incomparison with which young man I am a Angel. That young man hears the words Ispeak. . . . I am a keeping that young man from harming of you at the present moment,with great difficulty. . . . Now, what do you say?”I said that I would get him the file, and I would get him what broken bits of food Icould, and I would come to him at the Battery, early in the morning.“Say Lord strike you dead if you don’t!” said the man.I said so, and he took me down.“Now,” he pursued, “you remember what you’ve undertook, and you remember thatyoung man, and you get home!”“Goo-good night, sir,” I faltered.“Much of that!” said he, glancing about him over the cold wet flat. “I wish I was afrog. Or a eel!”At the same time, he hugged his shuddering body in both his arms,—clasping himself,as if to hold himself together,—and limped towards the low church wall. As I saw him go,picking his way among the nettles, and among the brambles that bound the greenmounds, he looked in my young eyes as if he were eluding the hands of the dead people,stretching up cautiously out of their graves, to get a twist upon his ankle and pull him in.Writing AssignmentThe following prompt asks you to write about a specific aspect of the selectionyou have just read. Refer to this prompt as you brainstorm, plan, draft, revise,and edit your response.A literary work’s characters are among its most basic parts. Taking a closerlook at the way characters are portrayed can teach us a lot about the work.Analyze the way Charles Dickens portrays the characters in this excerpt fromGreat Expectations. How does the characterization affect the passage? Usedetails and quotes to support your response.3weathercock  a turning mechanism on a roof which indicates the wind’s directionCC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 57 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 29. 58  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteratureBrainstormAfter you’ve read the passage and you’ve looked at the prompt, what next?Before you go any further, search for key words in the prompt that will help you builda response. In this case, characters, analyze, and affect the passage are all wordsthat could direct your efforts.The first stage of writing is brainstorming, which means jotting down all of yourthoughts on a topic. You may choose to freewrite, make a list, or draw a web; it’s upto you. However, all of your ideas should relate to the key terms in the prompt. Itmay help to circle or underline particular words and phrases in the passage. You’llneed to reread the passage several times before and during brainstorming; as youreread, you’ll notice more and more details that could support your response.A student was asked to write about the mood of the passage you just read. Here isa brainstorm web the student came up with to prepare for writing his response.SettinggraveyardfogchurchcountrysiderainyMoodeeriesuspensefulcreepyDialoguecriminal threatens PipPip says “sir,”uses short sentences,stammersWord Choiceraw afternoondark flat wildernessdistant savage lairgrowing afraid of it allshuddering bodyeluding the hands ofthe dead peopleBrainstorm  The student’snotes will help him craft a solidresponse to the prompt. Circle thewords in the web that show themain story elements the studentwill use in the response.Support  The student choosesdetails from the passage that helpto create its mood. Draw boxesaround words that come directlyfrom the passage.CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 58 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 30. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 59Think about how you might brainstorm for the prompt you have been assigned:Analyze the way Charles Dickens portrays the characters in this excerpt from GreatExpectations. How does the characterization affect the passage? Use details andquotes to support your response. Your first job is to identify the characters in thescene. Then examine the clues the author gives about their personalities andappearances. Write these details in your list, web, or chart. These steps will helpyou begin drafting a response later on.After you form your thoughts about the passage and gather enough information,it’s time to develop a thesis statement. Remember that a thesis statement conveysthe main argument of your essay, as well as significant supporting reasons. Makesure the thesis statement you devise is solidly supported by the text. It should notbe too broad or too narrow. A sweeping statement could be difficult to support,while a statement that is too narrow in its focus might not respond to the promptadequately.Below is a list of possible thesis statements the student came up with for hisresponse to the prompt about mood.Writing AssignmentOn a separate sheet of paper, brainstorm a response to the following prompt.You can use whatever brainstorming method works best to help you organizeideas. Then write a thesis statement that you will use to shape your response.A literary work’s characters are among its most basic parts. Taking a closerlook at the way characters are portrayed can teach us a lot about the work.Analyze the way Charles Dickens portrays the characters in this excerpt fromGreat Expectations. How does the characterization affect the passage? Usedetails and quotes to support your response.Possible Thesis Statements• The mood is created mainly by a spookysetting.• Dickens creates the suspenseful mood of thepassage through setting and dialogue.• Word choice is important to the mood of thispassage.Final Thesis StatementThe mood of suspense in this passage iscreated through setting, dialogue, and diction.THESIS STATEMENT  The thesisstatement should capture the mostimportant ideas conveyed in theresponse. How are the thesis state-ments in the first box inadequate?Why is the final thesis statementthe best choice for the response?CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 59 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 31. 60  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteraturePlanNow that you have brainstormed ideas for your response and have crafted athesis statement, it’s time to organize your information.You might organize the details you’ve assembled in numerous ways. One ofthe most common organizational methods is a simple outline, with headings andrelevant information below them. Some writers use Roman numerals to label theideas they will write about. Some writers use bullets. You can use either of these orcreate your own organizational system. However, your outline should clearly showthe different parts of your response.All essays, including responses to literature, should have the same basic parts.The introduction contains your thesis statement, along with the aspects of thepassage you are using to support it. Each body paragraph presents a differentreason that develops your thesis, with related supporting details. In an outline,these paragraphs are generally represented by listing each reason on a separateline with supporting details underneath. In some cases, these supporting detailswill be quotes—if you’re writing about an author’s word choice, for example. In othercases, summarized examples from the text will be sufficient. Your essay, and thusyour organizational outline, will end with a conclusion, in which you slightly restateyour thesis and possibly offer additional observations on the topic.Here is how the student who is writing about mood plans to organize his response.Organization  The studentsupports the introduction witha summary of the passage.Underline the sentences thatcontain this summary.I. IntroductionThesis  The setting, dialogue, and word choicecreate a mood of suspense in this passage.• The passage is the opening section ofCharles Dickens’s Great Expectations.• In it, Pip meets a criminal who makes a dealwith him, under threat of death.CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 60 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 32. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 61Writing AssignmentNow, using the details and the thesis you generated during your brainstorm,organize your thoughts on a separate sheet of paper. Use an outline form likethe one you see above to help you.A literary work’s characters are among its most basic parts. Taking a closerlook at the way characters are portrayed can teach us a lot about the work.Analyze the way Charles Dickens portrays the characters in this excerpt fromGreat Expectations. How does the characterization affect the passage? Usedetails and quotes to support your response.DevelopMENT  It is important toprovide clear reasons behind thethesis in a response to literature.Underline the reasons the studentplans to write about in his response.Support  When writing aresponse to literature, use directquotes and evidence from the textto support your ideas. Circle anywords that come directly fromthe passage.II. SupportReason #1  By setting the opening in agraveyard, Dickens ­creates a sense of gloom.• The fog makes the events taking placeseem mysterious.• The graveyard is in a barren part of thecountry.Reason #2  The dialogue helps to create amood as well.• Most of Pip’s lines are stammered, showinghis fear.• The convict makes many threats, increasinga sense of danger.Reason #3  Dickens’s word choice contributesto the mood of the passage.raw afternoon, dark flat wilderness, distantsavage lair, growing afraid, shudderingbody, eluding the hands of the dead peopleIII. Conclusion• restatement of thesis• final observationsCC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 61 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 33. 62  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteratureDraftNow that you’ve organized relevant details, quotes, and interpretations of thepassage, you should be ready to write a draft. As you start writing, remember to relyon the outline you made. Though you might adjust your outline while writing, it willhelp to have it as a guide as you move forward.In a response to literature, it is very important to support the observations andclaims you make with solid evidence from the text. The more closely you read, thebetter the evidence you gather will be. If you were writing a narrative, your taskwould be to make the setting, plot, and characters work together. In a persuasivepiece, you would have to make sure your arguments and supporting reasons wereall valid. But in this case, the words from the text that you choose to support yourthesis, along with your thorough analysis of them, are key in establishing yourauthority on the passage and topic.Read this draft of a response to a prompt about mood. This is a fairly late draft,after the student revised and edited it. We’ll be looking at those earlier versionslater in this lesson, so you can see how the draft reached its current form.How Dickens Builds MoodThough the mood of the opening scene of CharlesDickens’s Great Expectations incorporates aspects of gloom andfear, its main quality is suspense. In the passage, an escapedconvict attacks young Pip in a church graveyard, threatening tokill him if he doesn’t bring back food and a file, which the con-vict can use to remove a chain from his leg. Dickens establishesthe suspenseful mood in this scene through an eerie setting,tense dialogue, and word choice intended to create uneasinessin readers.Introduction  The studentbegins his draft by providing asummary of the passage andexplaining in a thesis statementwhat his response will be about.Underline the thesis statement.CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 62 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 34. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 63One of the most basic parts of the passage, its setting, isvery important to its mood. A graveyard has eerie connota-tions to begin with, but the details Dickens uses increase thefeeling of tension and suspense. At the passage’s beginning,Dickens describes the day the scene takes place as “raw,” whichcreates a sense of discomfort. Later, Pip states that his house is amile or more from the church, increasing a sense of isolationand danger, given the scene’s events. When the criminal runsaway, Dickens states that he looks out at the “cold wet flat,”reminding us of the damp, gloomy atmosphere in which thescene has occurred.The dialogue, as well, contributes to the passage’s moodthrough its general tone. The convict’s speech is very violent.After seizing Pip, he threatens to cut his throat if he isn’t silent.Later, he says he would like to eat Pip whole; at the end of thepassage, he states that he has a partner who is more brutal thanhe is. His statements, of course, make Pip very afraid. Pip’s state-ments in the passage show that he is very meek. The criminalspeaks in long, frightening sentences, while Pip’s sentences aremuch shorter, as if he were swallowing them. He also repeatsthe word “sir” several times. While this was probably a commonpolite expression of the time, Pip’s repetition of the word showshis nervousness. Because readers see the story from his point ofview, they are likely to sympathize with him, ultimately feelingnervous themselves.Support  Notice that the stu-dent uses quotes from the passageto support the main idea of thisparagraph. Circle these quotes.Transitions  Transitions helpmove readers from one part of theresponse to the next. Underlinethe transition words the studentuses in this response.Tone  References to the “reader”rather than “I” or “you” keep thetone objective, which is appropri-ate for the purpose and audience.Put a check mark beside refer-ences to “readers” in the draft.CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 63 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 35. Consider64  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteratureFurthermore, Dickens’s diction throughout this passage,in the setting’s description and dialogue as well as else-where, is designed to make readers feel tense and nervous.When describing the ocean, Dickens calls it a “distant savagelair from which the wind was rushing.” The use of the word“savage” suggests that nature is an intimidating force, bearingdown on the individual. Near one of the most exciting points ofthe passage, Dickens writes, “After each question he tilted meover a little more, so as to give me a greater sense of helpless-ness and danger.” The use of the words “helplessness” and“danger” make Dickens’s intentions fairly clear; he wishes tocreate an atmosphere charged with fear and suspense.When reading the passage, the mood is the most notice-able aspect. Close examination shows that three elements arecontributing to that mood: the setting, the dialogue, and thediction. The passage’s setting creates an eerie stage, on whichthe drama of the scene can unfold. The dialogue in the passageshows the conflict of the convict’s aggression and Pip’s fear.The language Dickens uses throughout the piece, finally, isintended to make readers feel uneasy, as if something terriblewere about to happen. This passage is an artful beginning to agreat work of literature.How effectively does the student organize the paragraphs in theresponse?How relevant and thoughtfully chosen are the examples used?How closely does the student analyze the passage to supportthe thesis?Conclusion  A conclusionshould always include a thoughtfulrestatement of the thesis. Draw abox around that statement inthis conclusion.CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 64 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 36. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 65TransitionsAs you’re writing your draft of a response to literature, you need to make sureyour thoughts flow smoothly. Your readers will not consider your ideas if theycan’t follow your line of thinking. Transitions are words and phrases that showrelationships between ideas. As you move from one thought to another, usetransitions to link your ideas across sentences and paragraphs.For example, the following three sentences come from a student’s response toa passage:There is a rainbow at the story’s conclusion. The ending of the story is ahappy one. The rainbow symbolizes hope.These sentences are clear and concise by themselves, but there’s nothing linkingthem. Watch what happens when you add transition words:There is a rainbow at the story’s conclusion, which is a happy one. Therefore,the rainbow symbolizes hope.When you add the words which and therefore to connect the sentences, thefinal result automatically reads more smoothly. You can do the same betweenparagraphs, to make a chain of thoughts flow through a whole essay. Somecommon transition words are ­however, finally, next, overall, furthermore,nevertheless, in addition, in conclusion, and on the other hand.Read the sentence below. Fill in the blank with the most appropriatetransition words.The captain is often a forbidding character. ,he deserves readers’ sympathy.Try ItWriter ,s CraftWriting AssignmentWrite a draft in response to the following prompt. You may compose your drafton a computer or on a separate sheet of paper.A literary work’s characters are among its most basic parts. Taking a closerlook at the way characters are portrayed can teach us a lot about the work.Analyze the way Charles Dickens portrays the characters in this excerpt fromGreat Expectations. How does the characterization affect the passage? Usedetails and quotes to support your response.CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 65 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 37. 66  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteratureReviseAfter you’ve written your draft, the next step is to revise. As with any revision,when you revise a response to literature, it’s most important that you step back,take a look at what you’ve written, and evaluate it. The most basic question to askyourself is whether you’ve read the passage carefully enough. Are you sure that yourthesis makes sense, in relation to the passage? Do you need to adjust it slightly? Isyour writing about the passage clear and coherent? Is your language suited to thetask and audience?Additionally, your thesis must be properly supported. If the details you havechosen to support an observation are weak, or if you have a hard time linking themwith your overall argument, then you need to go back to the text and find betterexamples. If you’re having a hard time finding better examples, then maybe thereason that you’re supporting is weak, and you may need to rethink it. If, onceyou’ve chosen an example, you find that your analysis is too brief or vague, thenyou’ll need to work harder at explaining its meaning and significance. The mostimportant thing to remember as you write a response to literature is that the moreclosely and attentively you read, the stronger your analysis will be.Take a look at these paragraphs from the first draft of the essay about mood.Then compare them to the same paragraphs from the final draft to see whatkinds of changes the student made when he revised his response.The mood of this passage is a mixture of gloom, fear,and suspense, and is highly memorable. In the passage, acriminal attacks young Pip in a church graveyard, threateningto kill him if he doesn’t bring back supplies. Dickens establishesthe mood of this scene in several ways. The setting of the pas-sage itself creates a sense of fear in the reader. Dickens chooseshis words carefully, as well. The dialogue is also intended tomake the mood of danger more intense.The setting is important. Dickens set this part of his novel ina graveyard, and in the details and images he uses to describethe graveyard, he contributes to the passage’s overall mood.When he suggests that no one goes to the graveyard, the readergets a sense of isolation. When Pip indicates that his house is amile or more from the church and the graveyard, the readers’sense of loneliness is intensified. When the criminal runs away,Dickens states that he looks out at the “cold wet flat.” The set-ting helps the mood.First DraftIntroduction  Notice thatthe student does not include athesis statement. Where would athesis statement best fit in theintroduction?Development  The student’slanguage is vague and sometimesconfusing. Ideas are introducedbut not discussed. Underlinesentences that could use moreexplanation.CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 66 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 38. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 67Revised DraftWriting AssignmentSometimes, the best commentary you receive on your writing comes fromclassmates. Exchange your draft, in its current stage, with a classmate. Lookover your classmate’s paper and make suggestions to improve it, using whatyou’ve learned so far as a guide. Refer to the prompt below to help you withyour evaluation.Then revise your draft, either on a separate sheet of paper or on thecomputer. Consider your classmate’s comments as you revise your ownresponse, modifying any weak spots he or she might have noticed. Finally,use a revising checklist to make sure your response is in good shape beforemoving on to the next step of the writing process.A literary work’s characters are among its most basic parts. Taking a closerlook at the way characters are portrayed can teach us a lot about the work.Analyze the way Charles Dickens portrays the characters in this excerpt fromGreat Expectations. How does the characterization affect the passage? Usedetails and quotes to support your response.Though the mood of the opening scene of CharlesDickens’s Great Expectations incorporates aspects ofgloom and fear, its main quality is suspense. In the passage,an escaped convict attacks young Pip in a church graveyard,threatening to kill him if he doesn’t bring back food and a file,which the convict can use to remove a chain from his leg.Dickens establishes the suspenseful mood in this scenethrough an eerie setting, tense dialogue, and word choiceintended to create uneasiness in readers.One of the most basic parts of the passage, its setting, is veryimportant to its mood. A graveyard has eerie connotations tobegin with, but the details Dickens uses increase the feeling oftension and suspense. At the passage’s beginning, Dickensdescribes the day the scene takes place as “raw,” which createsa sense of discomfort. Later, Pip states that his house is a mileor more from the church, increasing a sense of isolation anddanger, given the scene’s events. When the criminal runs away,Dickens states that he looks out at the “cold wet flat,” remindingus of the damp, gloomy atmosphere in which the scene hasoccurred.Introduction  The studentadded a clear thesis statementthat presents the main idea of theessay and supporting reasons.What changes did he make to formhis thesis statement?Development  The student hasclarified some confusing sentencesand has elaborated more fullyupon his ideas. How do his revi-sions help you better understandhis ideas?CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 67 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 39. 68  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteratureEdit and PublishIf revising involves shaping your response, then editing involves making sure thenuts and bolts of your piece are in place. Elements such as spelling, grammar, andsentence structure need to be checked—and rechecked, if necessary. In a responseto literature, there is a very specific set of points to address. Are the quotes from thepassage relevant to your main points? If you’ve quoted the passage, you’ll need tomake sure the quote is accurate, and that it’s attributed to the correct character,if necessary. Also, if you’ve mentioned details from the passage, make sure theycorrectly reflect the passage’s overall meaning.Once you’ve finished your response, it’s time to publish it! In this case, “publish-ing” will mean giving your response to your teacher for evaluation. You might alsoshare your paper with your classmates by uploading it to a class Web site ordiscussion board.Look at this excerpt from a draft of a student’s response to the prompt aboutmood. The student has used proofreading marks to edit his response.The dialogue, as well, contributes to the passage’s moodthrough its general tone. The convicts speech is very violent.After seizing Pip, he threatens to cut his throat if he isn’t silent.Later, he say he would like to eat Pip whole; at the end of thepassage, he states that he has a partner who is more brutelthan he is. His statements, of course, make Pip very afraid.Pip’s statements in the passage show that he is very meek. Thecriminal speaks in long, frightening sentences, while Pip’ssentences are much shorter, as if he were swallowing them. Healso repeat the word sir” several times. While this was probablya common polite expression of the time, Pip’s repetition of theword shows his nervousness Because readers see the storyfrom his point of view, they are likely to sympathize with him,ultimately feeling nervous themselves.,ss “brutal.Punctuation  Apostrophesshow possession. The authorwants to indicate that the speechis used by the convict. Explain whythe word convicts is incorrect inthis sentence.Spelling  Even the best spellerscan sometimes make mistakes.Watch out for words that arespelled differently from howthey sound. How can you tellthat the word brutel is spelledincorrectly?CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 68 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 40. Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to Literature 69Furthermore, Dickens’s diction throughout this passage,in the setting’s description and dialogue as well as elsewhere,are designed to make readers feel tense and nervous. Whendescribing the ocean, Dickens calls it a “distant savage lairfrom which the wind was rushing.” The use of the word “savage”suggested that nature is an intimidating force, bering downon the individual. Near one of the most exciting points of thepassage, Dickens writes “After each question he tilted me overa little more, so as to give me a greater sense of helplessnessand danger.” The use of the words “helplessness” and “danger”make Dickens’s intentions fairly clear; he wished to create anatmosphere charged with fear and suspense.a,isssSubject-Verb Agreement In order for a subject and verb toagree, a singular verb form mustfollow a singular noun, and aplural verb form must follow aplural noun. How does the sen-tence structure make it difficult toidentify the agreement error in thefirst sentence of this paragraph?Verb Tense  Most responses toliterature will use verbs in the pres-ent tense. Which kinds of verbs hasthe student corrected? What effectdoes the use of present-tense verbshave on his writing?CC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 69 5/2/13 11:22 AM
  • 41. 70  Lesson 3  •  Writing Responses to LiteratureWriting AssignmentNow use what you’ve learned to edit your response, using the editing checklistyour teacher has provided or one of your own. You may work either on yourcomputer or on a separate sheet of paper. When you have finished editing yourresponse, you may publish it.Parallel StructureComplicated writing assignments, such as responses to literature, may requirecomplicated sentences at times. Parallel structure can help make these sorts ofsentences clearer. When you check your writing for parallel structure, you makesure that all of the items or actions in a series have the same basic structure. Forexample, read this sentence:The plot of the novel was constructed with speed, elegance, and with gusto.This sentence does not use parallel structure. The phrase and with gusto doesnot match the structure of the phrases before it. Here is a better, smoother way ofwriting that sentence:The plot of the novel was constructed with speed, elegance, and gusto.The removal of the second with makes the structure parallel; the sentence nowsimply contains a series of abstract nouns, preceded by one with that refers to allof them.Revise the following sentences using parallel structure.1. The author develops the theme with plot devices, through dialogue, and withcharacterization. 2. After you have examined the text, and have read it thoroughly and understand it,then you will be ready to begin writing. Try ItGrammar ReviewCC13_ELA_L1C_U2_L3_SE 70 5/2/13 11:22 AM

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