CommunicationListeni..

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  • 1. Listening Actively: The Receiver’s Challenge "Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk." - Doug Larson
  • 2. Works Cited
    • Brownell, Judi. 1987. Listening: The toughest management skill. The Cornell H.R.A. Quarterly , February 1987: 65-71.
    • Decker, Bert. 1992. You’ve got to be believed to be heard: Reach the first brain to communicate in business and life. New York, NY: St. Martin’s Press.
    • Decker, Bert. 1996. The art of communicating: Achieving interpersonal impact in business. Revised edition. Menlo Park, CA: Crisp Learning.
    • www.Quotegarden.com : Listening. Accessed 10/31/03.
  • 3. Verbal & Non-Verbal Communication
    • Concepts :
      • Rapport
      • Non-Verbal Messages
      • Asking Good Questions
      • Sincere Paraphrasing
      • Active Listening
  • 4. Rapport
    • Being in sync with other people,
    • verbally and non-verbally,
    • so they are comfortable
    • and have trust and confidence in you
  • 5. Non-Verbal Messages
    • “ What you do speaks so loud
    • I can’t hear what you say.”
    • Ralph Waldo Emerson
  • 6. Non-Verbal Messages
    • Bert Decker’s book is titled “You’ve got to be believed to be heard” for a reason!
    • He discusses two factors
      • The Eye Factor
      • The Energy Factor
    • What people see
  • 7. Non-Verbal Messages
    • Eye Factor – What Others See
      • Eye Communication
      • Posture and Movement
      • Dress and Appearance
      • Gestures and Smile
  • 8. Non-Verbal Messages
    • Energy Factor – What Others Perceive
      • Voice and Vocal Clarity
      • Words and Non-Words
      • Listener Involvement
      • Humor
  • 9. Asking Good Questions
    • Show sincere interest
    • Deliver questions with “life”
    • Types of questions:
      • Positive questions (The way you ask)
      • Behavioral questions (How would you…)
      • Situational questions (In this situation…)
      • Probing questions (Elaborate/clarify)
  • 10. Sincere Paraphrasing
    • This is NOT “What I hear you saying is…”
    • State in your own words your understanding of what another person says or feels
      • You feel that…
      • You mean that…
      • You think that…
      • As I understand it…
    • Your Goal: “I hear, I understand, I care”
  • 11. Active Listening
    • Be engaged
    • Truly hear and process the message
    • Avoid distractions
  • 12. Listening in General
    • The most challenging of all communication skills
      • Requires focus
      • Requires practice
    • Different degrees
      • Passive at one end of the scale
      • Deeply involved – “Active Listening” – at the other
    • Different Ways
      • Fact (Discussion or Debate)
      • Feeling (Debate or Dialogue)
  • 13. Maslow’s Four Stages of Learning
    • Unconscious Incompetence
      • We don’t know what we don’t know
    • Conscious Incompetence
      • We know what we don’t know
    • Conscious Competence
      • We work at what we don’t know
    • Unconscious Competence
      • We don’t have to think about knowing it
  • 14. The Typical Executive
    • Spends 80% of his or her time communicating
    • Of that time:
      • Listening 45%
      • Speaking 30%
      • Reading 16%
      • Writing 9%
  • 15. Listening Capacity
    • We use only about ¼ of our listening capacity
    • Listening capacity is difficult to measure
    • Even without using quantifiable measures, what if each of us doubled our individual listening capacity?
  • 16. Brownell’s Model
    • HURIED
      • H earing
      • U nderstanding
      • R emembering
      • I nterpreting
      • E valuating
  • 17. H earing
    • Essential Actions:
      • Concentrate on what the speaker is saying
      • Allow the entire message to be delivered without interruption
    • Be comfortable with silence
    • Avoid Distractions
    • “ It’s about them, not you!”
  • 18. Something to ponder…
    • Speaking: 130-160 words per minute
    • We can process aural information at a rate of up to 700 words per minute
    • On average, we listen three times faster than most people talk
    • What can we do with that unused mental time?
      • Listening: The Toughest Management Skill, pg. 66-67
  • 19. In Closing…
    • “ The most important thing
    • in communication
    • is to hear what isn't being said.”
    • Peter F. Drucker