How to ask tough questions without it being tough.
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How to ask tough questions without it being tough.

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Some simple tips to give people the confidence to say what's on their mind without the concern of people giving you a piece of their mind.

Some simple tips to give people the confidence to say what's on their mind without the concern of people giving you a piece of their mind.

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How to ask tough questions without it being tough. How to ask tough questions without it being tough. Presentation Transcript

  • How ToBe A BitchBut In AGood Way.[HOW TO ASK & RESPOND TO THE HARDQUESTIONS WITHOUT BEING INTIMIDATED][ ]
  • CONTROVERSY AHEAD
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  • WOMEN REPRESENT ONLY 20% OF SENIOR POSITIONS IN COMPANIES ON A GLOBAL BASIS. 20 . DESPITE THERE BEING AN ALMOST 50:50 SPLIT BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN WORKING IN ADVERTISING, = ONLY 22.4% OF WOMEN HOLD SENIOR POSITIONS IN ADVERTISING AGENCIES. 50:50, 22.4% . OF ALL THE CREATIVE DIRECTORS IN THE WORLD, APPROX 3% ARE WOMEN. 3 .GRANT THORNTON INTERNATIONAL BUSINESSREPORT 2011 & THE IPA INDUSTRY REPORT 2011
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  • THREE THINGS I’VE NOTICED IN MY TIME IN ASIA [ ]
  • #1 CLIENTS VALUE QUANTITY MORE THAN QUALITY.#1 .#2 CLIENTS ARE EMPOWERED TO SAY NO MORE THAN YES.#2 .#3 CLIENTS DON’T LIKE BEING CHALLENGED.#3 .
  • QUESTIONS GIVE YOU THE POWER TOCHANGE EVERY OUTCOME. 你 .
  • THE FEAR E FFECT
  • SCENARIO #1 #1YOU ARE IN A MEETING WITH A BUNCH OF PEOPLE YOUREGARD AS VERY CLEVER. .WHEN YOU EVALUATE YOUR CAPABILITIES [OR KNOWLEDGE]AGAINST THERE’S, YOU DECIDE YOU ARE ‘VERY POOR’.  “ ”.BECAUSE OF THIS, YOU SPEND THE WHOLE MEETING AS QUIETAS A CHURCH MOUSE IN ORDER TO PROTECT YOURSELF FROM .LOOKING FOOLISH.
  • SCENARIO #2 #2YOU ARE IN A MEETING WITH A BUNCH OF PEOPLE YOU .REGARD AS VERY CLEVER.YOU HAVE A QUESTION BUT YOU ARE SO NERVOUS YOU .SPEND AGES GOING OVER IT IN YOUR HEAD TRYING TOSECOND-GUESS WHETHER IT IS A STUPID THING TO ASK. .BY THE TIME YOU COME TO THE DECISION IT IS VALID,THE OPPORTUNITY HAS EITHER GONE OR SOMEONEELSE HAS ASKED THE QUESTION.
  • SCENARIO #3 #3YOU FIND YOURSELF SURROUNDED BY A BUNCH OFPEOPLE WHO ALL SEEM TO KNOW EACH OTHER VERY, .VERY WELL.EVERYONE EXCEPT YOU, SEEMS TO SHARE THE SAMEVIEWPOINT BUT YOU KEEP QUIET BECAUSE YOU DON’TWANT TO LOOK FOOLISH AND THINK YOU MUST BE .WRONG BECAUSE OTHERWISE SOMEONE ELSE WOULDHAVE SAID SOMETHING.
  • SCENARIO #4 #4YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO PRESENT .TO A BUNCH OF PEOPLE WHO ARERENOWNED FOR BEING ‘TOUGH’. .YOU THINK OF HOW THEY COULD REACT TOWHAT YOU SAY AND DECIDE ITS BETTER TOLET SOMEONE ELSE TAKE OVER.
  • SCENARIO #5 #5YOU ARE IN A MEETING WHERE EVERYONE IS .SPEAKING IN A LANGUAGE THAT ISN’T YOURPREFERRED CHOICE. .BECAUSE OF THIS, YOU FIND IT HARD TO KEEP UPWITH WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING. .AFTER A WHILE, YOU REALISE THE PEOPLE HAVEMADE A DECISION YOU DON’T AGREE WITH BUT FEELIT’S TOO LATE TO BRING IT UP BECAUSE YOU DON’TWANT TO LOOK LIKE YOU’RE SLOW TO GRASP WHATHAS BEEN HAPPENING IN THE MEETING.
  • Five Ways ToTake Control:[ ]1. THE “EGO MASSAGE” QUESTION “2. THE “NUDGE IT ALONG” QUESTION “3. THE “PERSONAL EXPERIENCE” QUESTION “4. THE “INNOCENT CURIOSITY” QUESTION “5. THE “SELF DEPRECIATION” QUESTION “
  • 1. The “Ego Massage” QuestionPEOPLE LIKE TALKING ABOUT THEMSELVES.PEOPLE LIKE TO FEEL KNOWLEDGABLE AND IMPORTANT.SO WHEN YOU WANT TO CHALLENGE A CLIENT ON SOMETHING THEY’VE SAID, START OFF YOUR QUESTION WITH … “IN YOUR EXPERIENCE” OR “WITH YOUR KNOWLEDGE IN THIS FIELD” OR “IN YOUR OPINION”  … AND THEN ASK THE QUESTION YOU REALLY WANT TO ASK.DOING THIS NOT ONLY HELPS THEM FEEL YOU ARE INTERESTED IN THEIR OPINION, BUT BECAUSE THE QUESTION ISINQUISITIVE IN NATURE – RATHER THAN CHALLENGING – IT COMES OVER AS MORE CONVERSATIONAL AND NOTCONFRONTATIONAL.
  • 1. “ . . …… .
  • 2. The “Nudge It Along” QuestionNO ONE WANTS TO BE TOLD THEY’RE WRONG SO IF YOU FIND YOURSELF IN A MEETING AND SOMEONE HAS MADE ASTATEMENT YOU DISAGREE WITH, PRE-PHRASE YOUR RESPONSE WITH …“THAT’S REALLY INTERESTING, I HAVE A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE/VIEW … ”IT MIGHT NOT SEEM MUCH, BUT BY DOING THIS, YOU ARE NOT SEEN AS CHALLENGING THEIR VIEW, SIMPLY BUILDINGON IT – KEEPING THE WHOLE MEETING CALM, COOL AND FREE-FLOWING.OBVIOUSLY YOU SHOULD TALK FROM A POSITION OF KNOWLEDGE OR REFERENCE WHICH IS WHY IT’S ALWAYS GOOD TOPRE-PREPARE FOR ANY MEETING.THE BEST WAY TO DO THIS IS THINK ABOUT THE PURPOSE OF THE MEETING [IS IT TO SELL AN IDEA, PRESENT SOME FINDINGS, TAKEA BRIEF?] AND SPEND 20 MINUTES THE DAY BEFORE THINKING ABOUT CASE STUDIES OR EXPERIENCES THAT MIGHT BERELEVANT.YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN IT MIGHT COME IN HANDY.
  • 2. … … . . idea brief?) 20 . .
  • 3. The “Personal Experience” QuestionWHEN PEOPLE TALK ABOUT PERSONAL EXPERIENCES OR CIRCUMSTANCES,PEOPLE LISTEN IN A DIFFERENT WAY SO WHEN YOU ARE IN A SITUATIONWHERE YOU ‘FEEL’ SOMETHING IS WRONG BUT YOU DON’T HAVE ANY CASESTUDIES OR EXAMPLES TO BACK YOUR VIEW UP, RELATE YOUR QUESTIONTO SOMETHING YOU ARE DEEPLY FAMILIAR WITH.I OFTEN TALK ABOUT STORIES INVOLVING MY PARENTS TO EXPLAIN APARTICULAR FEELING/ATTITUDE OR OPINION.DOING THIS NOT ONLY HELP OTHERS UNDERSTAND/RELATE TO THEQUESTION YOU ARE RAISING, BUT YOU CAN SPEAK WITH CONFIDENCE ANDWARMTH BECAUSE IT IS SOMETHING YOU KNOW IS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
  • 3. . . . .
  • 4. The “Innocent Curiosity” QuestionPEOPLE OFTEN GIVE OPINIONS WITHOUT REALLY THINKNG ABOUT THEM.WHEN SOMEONE SENIOR DISAGREES WITH SOMETHING YOU FEEL VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT, SAY…“SO I CAN LEARN, CAN YOU PLEASE TELL ME WHERE MY IDEA DOESN’T WORK AS WELL AS YOURS”BY DOING THIS, YOU ARE FORCING THEM TO THINK ABOUT WHAT THEY’VE SAID IN MORE DETAIL AND THISOFTEN RESULTS IN THEM DISCOVERING YOUR IDEA IS JUST AS GOOD AS THEIRS AND SUDDENLY THESITUATION HAS GONE FROM OBSTACLES TO ENCOURAGEMENT.[A VERY NAUGHTY WAY TO MAKE PEOPLE BACK DOWN – OR CHANGE THEIR VIEW – IS TO LITERALLY REPEAT BACK THE QUESTION THEY’VESAID, BUT IN A SLOW, QUESTIONING VOICE AND THEN KEEP QUIET. 99% OF THE TIME, THEY WILL REPHRASE WHAT THEY HAVE SAID AND PUTYOU IN A POSITION OF CONTROL]
  • 4. . … .[ 99 ]
  • 5. The “Self Depreciation” QuestionSOMETIMES YOU WANT TO ASK A QUESTION BUT AREN’T SURE IF YOU’LL LOOK GOOD OR SILLY.RATHER THAN KEEP QUIET, CELEBRATE YOUR CONCERN BY STARTING OFF YOUR QUESTION WITH SOMETHING LIKE…“THIS MIGHT BE A SILLY QUESTION BUT …”BY DOING THIS, YOU AUTOMATICALLY DISARM ANY POSSIBLE NEGATIVE COMMENT BECAUSE YOU’VE IMPLIED YOUR REASONFOR ASKING A QUESTION IS MORE OUT OF CURIOSITY THAN JUDGEMENT.THIS METHOD IS ESPECIALLY USEFUL FOR PEOPLE WHO ATTEND MEETINGS WHERE CONVERSATIONS ARE NOT IN THEIRNATIVE LANGUAGE AND MAY WORRY THEY HAVE MISSED OUT ON IMPORTANT INFORMATION.BY STARTING YOUR QUESTION WITH “BECAUSE ENGLISH ISN’T MY NATIVE LANGUAGE, CAN I JUST MAKE SURE I HAVEUNDERSTOOD WHAT YOU’VE SAID” YOU CAN GET CLARIFICATION OF WHAT HAS BEEN DISCUSSED ANY NEGATIVE IMPLICATION.
  • 5. . … … . . .
  • Quick Challenge:WHICH QUESTION WOULD YOU USE TO MANAGE EACH SCENARIO
  • SCENARIO #1 #1A BUNCH OF SENIOR PEOPLE ARE SAYING .“WOMEN ONLY BUY PINK COMPUTERS”. .YOU DISAGREE. ?HOW WOULD YOU TELL THEM THEY’RE WRONG?
  • SCENARIO #2 #2A BUNCH OF CLIENTS WANT TO INCREASE SALES BY 100100% BUT ONLY WANT TO SPEND 50% OF THEIR .NORMAL BUDGET.HOW WOULD YOU MAKE THEM UNDERSTANDTHEY’RE MAD?
  • SCENARIO #3 #3YOU WANT TO EXPLAIN HOW PATRIOTIC CHINESEYOUTH ARE TOWARDS THEIR COUNTRY BUT HAVE .NO FACTS, PICTURES OR FIGURES.HOW WOULD YOU LET PEOPLE UNDERSTAND YOURPOINT OF VIEW?
  • SCENARIO #4 #4YOU THINK THE CLIENT WANTS SOME SCRIPTS 24PRESENTED IN 24 HOURS, HOW DO YOU:1/ CONFIRM THAT INFORMATION. 1/ .2/ TELL THEM THEY’RE WRONG. 2/ .
  • Three Things To Give YouThe Confidence To Try:IF YOU ARE WANT TO ASK A QUESTION BUT YOU AREN’T SURE IF IT’SRELEVANT OR NOT – YOU HAVE 3 CHOICES …[A] ASK THE QUESTION AND ACCEPT YOU’LL FIND OUT WHETHER IT ISRIGHT OR WRONG ALMOST IMMEDIATELY.[B] ASK YOURSELF IF THERE IS COMMON SENSE BEHIND YOURQUESTION: DOES IT RELATE TO THE CONVERSATION / THE CATEGORY /THE BUSINESS / THE TASK? IF IT DOES, ASK IT BECAUSE YOU CANT BEWRONG IF THERE IS REASON BEHIND WHAT YOU’RE ASKING.[C] WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY, RELOOK AT IT LATER, MAKESURE IT ASKS/SAY’S WHAT YOU WANT IT TO SAY AND THEN ASK IT AT ALATER MEETING OR VIA EMAIL.
  • …[A] .[B] .[C] .
  • Check List /Confidence Boost:IT IS VERY, VERY, VERY HARD TO BE TOTALLY WRONG IN .ADVERTISING.THERE ARE LITERALLY TONS AND TONS AND TONS OFRIGHT WAYS TO APPROACH A TASK AND FOR EVERY .EXAMPLE THAT SAYS IT’S THE ‘RIGHT WAY’, THERE WILLBE ANOTHER EXAMPLE THAT ALSO WAS SUCCESSFULTHAT FOLLOWED A TOTALLY DIFFERENT ROUTE. .IT’S WORTH REMEMBERING PEOPLE WHO’VE BEEN DOINGIT FOR YEARS CAN - AND DO - CONTINUALLY FUCK-UP.
  • Some Other Tips:•  SMILE•  SPEAK FIRMLY•  SPEAK LOUDLY•  SIT UP STRAIGHT•  TRY AND LOOK RELAXED•  DO PRE-MEETING HOMEWORK [BAIDU/GOOGLE TOPICS YOU THINK WILL BE COVERED]•  GET INVOLVED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE•  FIND OUT ABOUT THE PEOPLE YOU’RE MEETING [BAIDU/GOOGLE THE PEOPLE YOU’RE MEETING & USE LINKED IN]•  WALK IN AND SAY HELLO TO EVERYONE IN THE ROOM•  REMEMBER NOTHING NEW HAPPENS IF YOU DON’T CHALLENGE THE USUAL•  REMEMBER, BEING INVOLVED IN THE DISCUSSION IS BETTER THAN JUST WATCHING THE DISCUSSION
  • • • • • • •  [ BAIDU/GOOGLE ]• •  [BAIDU/GOOGLE linkedin]•  hello• • 
  • INFLUENCE & CONTROL THE THREE RULES TO REMEMBER 响& :1 PREPARE / 2 EXPERIMENT / 3 LEARN