Influence skills. andrew urich
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Influence skills. andrew urich Influence skills. andrew urich Presentation Transcript

  • Influence SkillsThe Power of Influence Andrew L. Urich, J.D. Puterbaugh Professor of Ethics & Legal Studies Oklahoma State University aurich@okstate.edu www.andrewurich.com 405.744.8619
  • Can I Influence You? McDonald’s Coffee Case Is $3 Million Reasonable? www.andrewurich.com
  • Idea #1The Facts Don’t Matter……… If No One Believes You The FACTS don’t matter! – Politics – Marketing vs. Finance Literally a matter of life and death. Ability to influence is a key to success. www.andrewurich.com
  • Idea #2People Are Annoying I like to be “right.” I love to say “I told you so.” I hate to admit I’m wrong even in those rare situations when it looks like I might be. Here’s how I make decisions: I decide what I want the answer to be – and then make up the logical reasons to support my decision. www.andrewurich.com
  • Idea #3Conflict Is Underrated Everyone wants to participate in decisions that affect them. Dispersion of power causes conflict and growing pains. Conflict identifies opportunities for improvement. www.andrewurich.com
  • Idea #4Authority Is OUT – Influence Is IN Use competence and commitment instead of position and status. Team building and leadership are not based on authority. We are influencing all of the time – positively or negatively.  The sign in PS 101  My daughter wants to go to Vegas  Authority at Tinker Air Force Base www.andrewurich.com
  • Idea #5When is “Sucking Up” actually “Sucking Up?” It’s not what you say….it’s how you make them feel.  My neighbor’s pictures  Baby pictures  The IT people www.andrewurich.com
  • The Advantage of Ethical Influence“A lie can travel halfway aroundthe world while the truth is puttingon its shoes.” -- Mark Twain www.andrewurich.com
  • Keys to Influence & Informal NegotiationStrategy for Success: Plan in advance! A little preparation saves the day. It’s not always what you do say – it’s often what you don’t say. www.andrewurich.com
  • Keys to InfluenceStrategy for Success: Five Factors for Planning1. Overcome communication blockers. (First, get them to listen)2. Look for win/win opportunities (manage self-interest).3. Become a persuasive messenger. (Be likeable and look the part)4. Don’t create conflicts and confrontations. (Make them feel good about you)5. Get control of information and misinformation. (It’s not all about the facts…but facts are important) www.andrewurich.com
  • COMMUNICATION BLOCKERSIf They Aren’t Listening… It Doesn’t Matter What You Say.
  • Communication BlockersMultiple Choice Question a) U.S.D.A. b) A.A.A.E. c) OSU Ag College d) K Fed www.andrewurich.com
  • Limit the Impact of Your Point of View Areyou impacted by experience? (Driving Rule of Relativity) Are you assuming everyone should think like you? Could you be wrong? www.andrewurich.com
  • Overcome the Bias of Others What stereotypes might they have about you? How can you outflank their bias? People can only hear and incorporate things they understand. www.andrewurich.com
  • Learn to Open Closed Minds Things are exactly as people choose to see them. Is it important enough to care? Value diversity. www.andrewurich.com
  • Win/Win OpportunitiesManaging the Impact of Self Interest.
  • Factor in the Interestsof Both Sides How will the other person profit from your relationship? Can you make the other person’s job easier? Can you help the other person appear better in the eyes of his/her superiors? www.andrewurich.com
  • Win/Win Make the Pie Bigger Instead of Arguing About How to Slice It Win/Win is an attitude. – 62% believe in the fixed pie fallacy. – Pay close attention to their concerns. – Use creativity, diligence and enthusiasm to identify new options. www.andrewurich.com
  • Become a Persuasive Manager Be Likeable and Look the Part!
  • Learn to Become EVEN More LikeableWe prefer to comply with the requests of people we like.  We like, trust, and believe people who like us. www.andrewurich.com
  • Learn to Become More LikeableIt’s not fair– but people judge you by your appearance.Well-Dressed People are Perceived As: – More productive – Responsible – Personally acceptable – More intelligent – More honest – Hardworking – Taking their job seriously www.andrewurich.com
  • Learn to Become More Likeable Consistently search for similarities between yourself and those with which you deal. Develop the habit of giving sincere compliments. Familiarity and contact enhance liking. www.andrewurich.com
  • Learn to Become More Likeable Listening and taking an interest in the other person Friendliness Body language – smiling, nodding, leaning in, eye contact People like optimistic and enthusiastic people. www.andrewurich.com
  • Avoid Conflict and Confrontations Make Them Feel Good About You.
  • You Will Never Prove Them Wrong Have you ever done it before? Would you rather be right, or would you rather be happy? How would you feel if someone proved you wrong? www.andrewurich.com
  • Avoid Confrontations What they say – has a lot to do with what you already said. Theirlife experience is different than yours. Focus on the issue – don’t make it personal. Be very considerate. www.andrewurich.com
  • Keys to InfluenceStrategy for Success: Five Factors for Planning1. Overcome communication blockers. (First, get them to listen)2. Look for win/win opportunities (manage self-interest).3. Become a persuasive messenger. (Be likeable and look the part)4. Don’t create conflicts and confrontations. (Make them feel good about you)5. Get control of information and misinformation. (It’s not all about the facts…but facts are important) www.andrewurich.com
  • Summary of Influence and Persuasion The Ten Most Important Things to Remember1. The most important thing – do they like you?2. The other most important thing – break through communication blockers.3. Authority is out – influence is in.4. Planning influence opportunities in advance can lead you to great success.5. Look for Win/win opportunities. www.andrewurich.com
  • Summary of Influence and Persuasion The Ten Most Important Things to Remember6. You have a point of view.7. Do not underestimate self-interest.8. You will never prove them wrong.9. It’s not what you say….it’s how you make them feel.10. Good relationships provide power, security and success! www.andrewurich.com
  • Thank You Please keep in touch. aurich@okstate.edu www.andrewurich.com www.andrewurich.com
  • References Ailes, Roger. You Are the Message. New York. Doubleday, 1988. Cialdini, Robert B. Influence: Science and Practice. 3rd Ed. New York: Harper Collins, 1993. Cohen, Herb. You Can Negotiate Anything. Secaucus, N.J.: Lyle Stuart, 1980 Covey, Stephen R. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. New York: Simon & Schuster, 1989. Dayton, Doug. Selling Microsoft. Holbrook, MA., Adams Media Corporation, 1997. Fisher, Roger and William Ury. Getting to Yes. New York: Viking Penguin, Inc., 1981. Forsyth, Patrick. The Negotiators Pocketbook. London: Alresford Press Ltd., 1993. Johnson, Spencer. The One Minute Sales Person. William Morrow, N.Y, 1984. Karrass, Chester L. Give and Take. New York: Harper Collins, 1993. Karrass, Chester L. The Negotiating Game. New York: Harper Collins, 1992. Kozicki, Stephen. The Creative Negotiator. Pyrmont, Australia: Gower, 1993. Lewicki, Roy J., et.al. Negotiation. 2nd Edition. Burr Ridge, Il.: Irwin, 1994. Nierenberg, Gerald 1. The Art of Negotiating. New York: Barnes & Noble, 1995. Paul, Richard. Critical Thinking. Santa Rosa, CA: Foundation for Critical Thinking, 1993. Schoonmaker, Alan N. Negotiate to Win: Gaining the Psychological Edge. Englewood Cliffs, N.J.: Prentice Hall, 1989. www.andrewurich.com